set it forth from day to day Ps 96.2 part 2 The Second part of the Soliloquie wherein is set forth the certaintie of Death A Braham is dead the Prophets are dead and my Saviour Christ sayd Io 8.52 If a man keepe my sayings hee shall never tast of death At this the Iewes were very much stumbled and mee think 's they had some collour for their contention about it For if Abraham were dead Rom. 4 11. Iam 2.23 Gen 22 18. Lu 1.70 who was the father of the faithfull who was the friend of God hee in whose seede all the nations of the earth were promised a blessing because hee obeyed the voyce of the Lord And if the Prophets were allso dead those holy Prophets which have beene since the world began and by whom the Lord did reveale his pleasure unto the people If all these were dead well might the Iewes wonder when our Saviour said If a man keepe my saying hee shall never tast of death Well indeede they might wonder for ignorance is the cause of all our merveiles Did wee but know a certaine reason for every event wee should never wonder at that which happeneth but wee should magnifie the first greatest cause which is God The Iewes wondered because they were ignorant and supposed that our Saviour had spoken of a temporall death whereas hee meant that which is eternall True it is that the temporall death is an effect and fruit of the first sinne but eternall death is the punishment of impenitencie and infidelitie for those who both can and truely doe repent neither can nor shall be lyable to an eternall death Nay dye they cannot in any kind for this which wee call a death shall be to them but a deliverance and that death which is a perpetuall living death in the land of darknesse they shall be certainly freed from by the blood of the Sonne of God Yet this passage this sweete change in the godly and allso this gate which openeth to the ungodly the way to eternall woe the Scripture doeth commonly tearme a death this death cannot possibly be avoyded by the children of Adam Heb. 9.27 for it is appointed unto men once to dye 'T is true 't is true indeede I am ready to find it verefied in my selfe for the harbingers of this death have taken up my body where it intendeth to lodg The weakenesse of my limbs and the faintnesse of my spirits and the shortnesse of my breath and the lownesse of my voyce and the palenesse of my cheekes and the hollownesse of mine eyes all these doe but assure mee of the approaches of this death But is there noe resistance Is there noe reversing of the decree Noe repealing of the statute Alas noe none at all This body which hath beene pampered with the delicacie of meates must now be slaughtered and make a feast for the wormes These bones which have layen upon the beds of ease must become as tables for the loathsome vermine And this skinne this prowde skinne which hath stollen so much time to imploy in the suppling and colouring and smoothing and covering of it must serve like a cloath spread on these tables whereon must be presented this collation for the wormes Short is my life fleeting are my dayes and my winged minuits fly with such speede that I caâ— hardly count them so fast as they consume Wheâ— I enjoyed the most sound and beloved health even then the shortnesse of my life was discovered in my breath for I was intrusted onely with a litle ayer which neither was in my power long to keepe nor long without it could I possiblie continue I was so false in my promises which I made unto my God that hee would not trust mee long with the keepng but of a litle of that element I have allways lâ—ved at the brinke of death and yet never seriously enough thought of that which now is ready to approach I never thought indeede of the hower of my death by a due preparation to entertaine it when it should come Nay I fondly imagined that it must of necessitie keepe the roade of diseases sicknesse whereas it might have hastened by wayes un-expected When I was healthfull I grew so proude that I imagined certainly it either could not or durst not assayle my body and yet when I was afflicted with the smallest paine then againe I was so cowardly dejected that I was afraid it hastened by each part and member When I smarted I was taken off from my pride but the cure of that sinne was an immoderate and a slavish feare But now I am well assured that neither strength nor youth nor beauty nor physick nor any thing else can secure our bodies from returning to the earth True it is that the dead know not any thing Eccl 6.5 neither have they any more a reward for the memorie of them is forgotten but the living know that they shall dye c 8.8 There is noe man that hath power over the spirit to reteine the spirit neither hath hee power in the day of death Wherfore then have 〈◊〉 so long lived in ignorance or forgetfullnesse of mine end If I had remembred it I would have fitted and prepared mine accounts against the time it should come If I had knowne it I would have laboured to have made the judge my friend But ô I forgot it for I increased my sinnes and thought not of the debt I was ignorant too and knew not the terribloesse of the Iudg. Now mee think's these cold and clammie sweats doe chiefely arise from my chiding conscience and from the convulsions which there I suffer through the guilt of my sinnes I never was so carelesse or ignorant of death as I now am certaine of it yet afraid to dye Eccl 12.7 Iob. 30.23 Now I am sensible that my dust shall returne to the earth as it was I know that the Lord will bring mee to death to the house appointed for all the living Die say I Yes But must I dye Yes But when That I know not many dayes or howers I cannot expect to live who am allready pined into the leanenesse of an Anatomie But where must I dye That I know not neither even in this bed it is most likely where I now lye languishing in the torments of my disease But how or by what meanes must I dye Nor can I tell that allthough this sicknesse seemeth to be dispatched hither for this very purpose But if it be so sure that dye I must is it likewise as sure to what place I shall goe O this question is the common troubler of the dying There are but two havens where soules can arrive the one is the holy land the new Ierusalem the haven of eternall happinesse the other is a land too but it is a land of darknesse a land of smoakes and stinkes a place of eternall horrour To the former the godly are wafted by a convoy of
description of the manner of the sease p. 575 2 The cause of the Malady p. 581 3 The hope of recovery p. 592 The Prayer p. 605 25 Teares of a Mother on her deathbed blessing her children The Soliloquie Consisting of two parts viz 1 Her preparation to blesse them p. 609 2 The blessing it selfe ending in a Prayer p. 616 26 Teares of a dying Woman wherein is set downe her Religious exercises 1 a Soliloquie in which is set forth 1 a desire of life p. 627 2 Certainty of death p. 637 2 A godly preparation against the minuit of death p. 644 3 A Prayer of the Sicke p. 654 4 The Consolation of the godly in the hower of death p. 658 5 The Resignation of the foule into the hands of God p. 664 27 Teares in the distressed time of Civill Warrs The Soliloquie Containing a Patheticall grievous Lamentation for the present distractions both in our Church and Commonwealth by reason of these cruell most bloody warrs p. 669 The First prayer wherein is set downe 1. Gods Iustice in punishing his owne people in former times 2 His Iustice also in the present punishing us for our offences 3 An earnest supplication for our repentance and his forgivenesse p. 701 The second Prayer consisting of 1 A dolefull complaint of our grievous Calamities 2 An humble desire of the Remission of our sins 3 A fervent supplicatioÌ„ for righteousnesse peace p. 713 The third Prayer wherein the Lord is humbly implored that our bloody battels may bee turned into a spirituall war fare p. 722 FINIS THE FIRST SVBJECT Teares of godly sorrow or Devout Melancholy wherein a flexible disposition apt to weepe imployeth those Teares in a sorrow for sin The sanctified Ejaculation to precede each severall meditation and prayer Psal 5. vers 1. Give eare to my words o Lord consider my meditation vers 2. Hearken unto the voice of my cry my king and my God for unto thee will I pray THE MEDITATION WHy art thou so full of heavinesse Ps 42.6 o my soule and why art thou so disquieted within mee What nothing but teares Nothing â—ut sighs and throbs of â trembling soule Griefe without cause is madnesse and without moderation it is hopelesse I must â—herfore looke into the cause and hope it is Religion that raiseth this tempest But let mee not erre in my judgment Is my sin the cause of my sorrow Or doe not I rather adde to my sinne by the pretence of my ground That teare of a faithfull soule which floweth from the conscience of evill purifieth the conscience and freeth from punishment If the weight of my transgressions depresseth my soule the comforts of the Crucified shall restore me to ioy Oh the first cause of my blubbered eye was that which made our parents strive to hide them selves from the sight of our Creatour Gen 3.8 Since that very offence it hath beene a sin not to weepe and yet too much weeping may be turned into sin Teares are the effect of sin and teares may be the actours of sin Thus even our best actions have their pollutions our griefe for our offences may as well displease as pacifie the offended Deitie But surely I grieve for mine iniquities which have incensed my Creatour I sorrow because I can expresse noe more sorrow for my faults Thus farre my passion then is religion Ps 56.8 Lu 7.38 my God shall put these teares into his bottell Thus Mary Maydalene stood at the feete of my Saviour behind him weeping washing his feete with her teares and wiping them with the haires of her head My sin is the ground of my shame and my shame enforceth mee to come behind that Iesus Ier 9 1 whom Mary thus embalmed O that my head were waters mine eyes a fountaine of teares that I might thus weepe day and night for the offences which I have committed But doe not I slaunder my teares Am I not mis-taken in the cause God forbid Noe cause can be so great as the greatnesse of my sinns and yet even these may multiply when I most lament them O my God accept of the teares which I shed for my sinns sanctifie my sorrowes that they turne not into offences Yet I find in the Scripture other causes of laments 2. King 20.5 Ier 9.17 Thus the All-mighty not onely heard the prayers of Hezekiah but saw his teares too when hee pleaded for life The Iewes were commanded to call for the mourning women to make hast and take up a wayling for them that their eyes might runne downe with teares their eyelids gush out with water because the voyce of wayling was heard out of Zion the destruction of the lewes was hard at hand Thus the Prophets eyes did faile with teares Lam 2.11 his bowells were troubled his liver was powred upon the earth for tâe destruction of Ierusalem This griefe arose from the sense of their sorrow That the most high was prouoked by the sin of the prople What the Iewes deserâ—ed may be my râ—ward and what Ierusalem expected may be my heavy doome for the fame God is offended with mee and my sinns have merited the height of his vengeance Yet the more I sin the more hee spare's expecting some measure of my sorrow for my boundlesse offences O let my teares be his by a gracious acceptance as my sin is made his by his fathers imputation for hee alone who wept in the garden can pleade my attonement and by the power of his passion restore mee to comfort Incredulity in part did trouble the man in the Gospel Mar 9.14 whose sonne was Possessed with a devill both deafe and dumb yet hee cryed out and said with teares Lord I believe help my un-beliefe Deafnesse I find doeth hang in mine eare too even in the house of my God for when mine attention is required to the words which distil from the mouth of the preacher even then the poison of the serpent makes mee imitate the adder refusing to heare the voyce of the charmer Ps 58.4 5. When I should counsaile my brethren when I should publish the trueth when I should confesse my sinns woe is mee the string of my tongue is knitt Iam. 3.5 the dores of my lipps are sealed up and though mine unruly litle member is active in the language of all impiety yet it is stricken dumb with silence when it should publish mine enormities Whence growe's this dumbnesse whence this deafnesse Lord shouldest thou be so deafe to my cries or dumb to my heart I should never hope for the mercies of my Redeemer But some faith thou hast given mee in the merits of his passion doe thou increase it The seede is thine the planting is thine Lord let it flourish that the advantage may be mine Mar 13 32. It is as yet the least of all seedes let it grow into a tree that the birds the birds of Paradise may nest in the
and yet 't is a paine to mee to cry yea and 't is follie to cry because I receave 〈◊〉 certaine hurt by it but noe release from thâ— which I cryfor I envy all that enjoy theâ— health and each moment I am ready to repiâ— at him who hath brought mee so low Thâ— smile of a visitant is a dagger at my heart for while I find my selfe thus lingering in a sicknesse I looke that the whole world should decay for companie I am fretfull and peevish and disturbed with every thing yea even by a continuance of the fretfulblesse it selfe One while I faine would have my life prolonged another while I cry out for a speedie departure Sometimes I have a kind of glimmering oâ— health and then I am so proude of it that 〈◊〉 adventure too much Either I eate too much or I walke too much or I discourse too much or one thing or other exceeding its proportion speedes mee back againe to my former weaknesse then am I sorrie for what I have done and yet am I apt either to denie or excuse it Thus ô thus is my body perplexed but all this while I say nothing of my soule I am sensible of the anguish which I feele in my body but in what estate or condition doe I find my foule My body is allmost resolved into that whereof it was framed my soule therfore is not long to continue upon earth When they shall part it will prove either a day of tryumphant blisse or else a dismall time â—t will be of horrour and confusion O come come thou fond and foolish woman looke â—o that darling which ere long shall be crowned with a diademe of glory or else be damned with the rebellious ghosts Well I am resolved I will now take up banishing the thoughts or hopes of recoverie I will prepare my selfe that I may meete my God O my God assist mee in this my resolution and blesse mee in the performance part 2 The second part of the Soliloquie expressing the cause of the maladie HAd Adam continued in his integritie man should have beene freed from the tortures of sicknesse The dead and trampled earth should not have beene freer from thornes and thistles then man the living earth from maladies and infirmities But ô I feele the sowernesse of the apple in the bitternesse and sharpnesse of my disease and needes must I therfore remember mine originall corruption This is the cause of my languishing this is the ground of my feeblenesse But is this all Have I nothing but the staine which I inherit from my parents to be termed the cause of this my miserie One onely offence to my greate creatour hath power enough to purchase my disquiet But have I but one Is mine hereditarie sinne mine onely crime Surely I feare that I have something amisse in mine owne thoughts and words and actions as well as in my parent's un-kind legacie I cannot believe that God doeth afflict my body with these chastisements yea and threaten my soule too with eternall tortures and all this onely for a sinne of Adam so many ages since committed Thus indeede hee might doe and yet I should not chuse but justifie him when hee should speake Ps 51.4 and cleare him when hee should judg Oh but I feele some-thing else at my heart as weightie as lead which make's mee cry out it is some-thing at my conscience which telleth mee that I have more to answer for then the pollutions of nature it assureth mee that I have offended cruelly deepely desperately I have offended 'T is true ô mine angrie my disturbed conscience I must confesse I have Oh my heart I feele there I feele there something more then an universall guilt I have offended I have sinned actually greatly mightily bloodily in every thought in every word in every action I have so industriously imployed my time to the dishonour of my God that I cannot remember I ever pleased him Guiltie guiltie I must I doe confesse my selfe highly guiltie of fearefull crimes such as disturbe mee in the very remembrance O my God vouchsafe mee a repenting heart for them yet never without the assurance of thy mercy and pardon through the sufferance of thy Sonne How can I choose but find my sinnes even in my very feeble and consuming sicknesse Since I have so many testimonies in the sacred pages that God is noe revenger untill mee are delinquents All disturbances of the body doe un-doubtedly arise from the pollutions of the soule The Prophet David confessed it and said Ps 38.3 There is noe soundnesse in my flesh because of thine anger neither is there any rest in my bones by reason of my sinnes My Redeemer justified it when hee who had beene shaken with a palsie was brought unto him lying upon his bed for hee cured him Mat 9.2 and said Sonne be of good cheere thy sinnes be forgiven thee And againe when thirtie eight yeeres had beene spent by a man in a lingering disease and after that my Iesus had cured him when hee found him in the Temple Io 5.14 his words to him were Behould thou art made whole sinne noe more lest a worse thing come unto thee Saint Paul assured the Corinthians that because they did unworthily approach the table of the Lord 1. Cor 11.30 even for this cause many were weake and sick among them and many slept Thus the punishment is sent from God but the offence is both in and from our selves But have all diseases the same originall Is sinne the ground of every sicknesse Cannot I be afflicted with this languishing maladie but it must needes proceede from the wickednesse I have committed Noe doubtlesse for this very kind and manner of sicknesse hath particularly beene threatned yea and sent too as a punishment for disobedience A languishing hath beene threatned and sent upon the very creatures for the sinnes and wickednesse of the offending people Thus the Prophet bemoaneth the punishment of the Iewes for their greate rebellions and saith The earth mourneth Is 24.4 and fadeth away the world languisheth and fadeth away the height of the people of the earth doeth languish Ier 14.2 Thus in a grievous famine Iudah mourned and the gates thereof languished they were black unto the ground and Ierusalem was gone up Is 16.8 Thus the fields of Hesbon languished and the vine of Shibmah the lords of the heathen brake downe the principall plants thereof Ioel 1.10 Thus among the Iewes the field was wasted the land mourned for the corne was wasted the new wine was dryed up the oyle languished vers 12 the vine was dryed up and the figg-tree languished Thus in the confusion of Egypt the fishers mourned Is 19.8 and all that did cast the angle into the brookes lamented and they that spread netts upon the waters did languish Thus among the enemies of the church the earth mourned and languished c 33.9 Lebanon was ashamed and hewen
was as mine owne soule the sad losse of whom still doeth and still will sitt cold heavy upon my wounded heart Some comfort indeede I have in that sweete odour he left behind him from whence every Christian may receave an Aromatick perfume of learned profit and content yea even those who too unkindly were the cause of putting salt water upon that sweete waxe whereby the Tapour was extinguished To these losses afflictions I might adde many many more beside my present condition among strangers and forrainers and my continuall heart-quakes at the strickt menaces of the ruine and Desolation of my poore bleeding gasping countrie Yet while there is life there is hope even that hee who hath made our land to tremble Ps 60.2 and hath broaken it will in his owne due time heale the breaches thereof for it shaketh In this Manuall thou shalt find noe Author quoted but the Best of all and noe language but English The whole booke is in thy mother tongue and all the proofes excepting a very few are Scripture Luc 23 â—8 The weeping daughters of Ierusalem love best to be comforted in the language of Canaan Is 19.18 Here I â—ould an Ewer nay a Fountaine of â—ater to those that neede it for the reâ—eshing of their soules yet I hinder â—…ne from turning their owne Cocks â—…d letting them runne If any conâ—emne the worke as needlesse in these rightest times for so they are â—ought to be set formes of prayers beâ—…g by many dashed quite out of counâ—mance let them know that these are â—…t intended for them but for those â—ho doe neede and will use them I â—nfine not any to these Formes nor â—e I deny them to any who shall wilâ—ngly accept them In them thou hast â—e helpeâ— â—f many choice places of â—cripture 〈◊〉 for thy severall occasiâ—…s which â—eradventure otherwise would not be so ready at hand when â—ou shouldest stand in neede of them Whatsoever throughout the whole â—ooke thou findest good know that 〈◊〉 is Gods now made thine as well as mine blesse him for it What thou â—ndest here amisse except the faults of the presse I confesse it mine yet â—either wittingly nor willingly is it mine howsoever charge it to mine account Doe thou friendly reckon with mee and I will thankfully satisfie thee and be sure to remember that as it is thy duety to be thankfull for the best so thou oughtest to be charitable in thy censure of the rest Consider what I say 2. Tim. 2.7 and the Lord give thee understanding in all things Thy servant in him Phil 2.7 who tooke upon him the forme of a servant for us IOHN FEATLEY From my house in Flushing April 17. 1646. A Table of the particular contents THe First subject Teares of Godly sorrow or devout Melancholy wherein a flexible disposition apt to weepe employeth those Teares in a Sorrow for sin The Soliloquie p. 1 The Prayer p. 7 Teares from the Heart The Soliloquie confistnig of 3 parts viz 1 The wickednesse of a corrupted heart p. 11 2 Alamentation for the losse of an honest heart p. 23 3 Griefe for an old and sinfull heart and an earnest desire of a righteous new one p. 35 The Prayer p. 45 Teares of Time The Soliloquie consisting of 3 parts viz 1 A Revieuw of the time past p. 48 2 A Consideration of the time present p. 64 3 A Resolution for the time to come p. 75 The Prayer p. 83 Teares in the night The Soliloquie Devided into 3 parts fitted for the time 1 Immediately before going to bed p. 85 Evening Prayer p. 98 2 Of lying downe in the bed p. 100 3 Of awaking in the night p. 111 Teares in the Day Devided into 3 parts and fitted for the time 1 Of awakng early in the morning p. 123 2 Of beeing newly risen p 136 The morning Prayer p. 146 3 Of preparing to goe to dinner p. 149 Teares of Compassion in time of prosperity The Soliloquie treating of earthly riches and the rewarâ— of Charity p. 161 The Prayer p. 18â— 7 Teares in time of adversity in 4 Soliloquies treating of 1 A decayed estate or plenty turned into poverty p. 18â— 2 The prayer p. 204. 2. Hunger both corporall spâ—rituall p. 208 The prayer p. 23â— 3 Thirst both bodily and ghostly p. 23â— The Prayer p. 24â— 4 Nakednesse both of the Outward and Inwarâ— man p. 249 The Prayer p. 260 8 A Virgin 's Teares The Soliloquie p. 26â— The Prayer p. 27â— 9 Teares of a Married woman Soliloquie treating of thâ— dutyes of a wife to her husband p. 275 the prayer p. 29â— 10 Teares of an Aged woman p. 293 The prayer p. 307 11 Teares of a Barren woman p. 311 The prayer p. 321 12 Teares of a Childbearing woman 1 At the time when thee beginneth to fall in travell 2 After her delivery The soliloquie consisting of 3 parts 1 The Cause of the forrow and the confidence of thâ— sorrowing p. 324 2 The greatenesse of the pangs hazards and feares of a Travelling woman p. 332 3 Consolation and comfort for a woman in the bitternesse of her Travell p. 340 The prayer p. 343 2 Teares of a woman after her delivery from the paines of childbearing p. 346 The Prayer p. 351 13 Teares in time of Pestilence The Soliloquy consesting of 6 severall parts treating of 1 Mourning by example in a publick calamity p. 354 2 Severall causes of gods visitations p. 368 3 Sin especially the cause of the pestilence p. 381 4 Severall examples of dreadfull Pestilences p. 388 5 Gods threatning before his visitation p. 395 6 The duty of a Christian decreeing to whome and for whome wee ought to pray in time of Pestilence p. 403 The Prayer p. 413 â—4 Teares of her whose house is shutt up for the Pestilence The Soliloquy p. 420 The Prayer p. 431 â—5 Teares of her who is visited with the Pestilence beeing 1 Either wounded with a Sore p. 437 2 Or marked with the tokens p. 445 The prayer p. 455 â—6 Teares of a Mother for the sicknesse of her child the Soliloquie p. 461 The Prayer p. 469 â—7 Teares of a Mother for the death of her child The Soliloquie p. 473 The Prayer p. 480 â—8 Teares of a Wife for the sicknesse of her husband The Soliloquie p. 484 The Prayer p. 492 â—9 Teares of a woman lamenting the death of her beloved husband the Soliloquie p. 495 the prayer p. 506 â—0 A woman's Teares at the Funerall of her husband the Soliloquie p. 510 The Prayer p. 528 â—1 Teares of a woman in the state of Widdow-hood the Soliloquie p. 531 The Prayer p. 543 â—2 Teares of an Orphan at the death of her father The Soliloquie p. 545 The Prayer p. 561 â—3 Teares for the death of a beloved Freind or Brother The Soliloquie p. 563 the Prayer p. 573 â—4 Teares in a Cousumption or any languishing sicknesse the Soliloquie consisting of 3 parts 1 a complaint and
the power of thy grace that they may neither sinne by excesse nor offend in the cause Put them into thy bottle Ps 56.8 note them in thy booke In thy mercy Mat. 26.38 finish soone these dayes of sinne that by the merits of him that was sorrowfull in the garden Rev. 7.17 all teares may one day be wiped from mine eyes all sorrowes expelled driven from my heart my soule may be receaved into the quire of Saints there to live and reigne with thee world without end Amen Teares from the heart THE SECOND SVBJECT The Soliloquie consisting of three parts viz. 1 The wickednesse of a corrupted heart 2 A Lamentation for the losse of an honest heart 3 Griefe for an old and sinfull heart an earnest desire of a righteous new one The first part The wickednesse of a corrupted Heart THE EjACULATION Ps 5. 1. Give eare to my words O Lord consider my meditation 2. Hearken unto the voice of my cry my king and my God for unto thee will I pray THe heart is deceitfull above al things and desperately wicked Ier 17.9 who can know it saith God by his Prophet What is here A heart Adeceit full heart A heart deceitfull above all things A wicked heart Desperately wicked A heart inscrutable Lord surely this is the just description of my heart if yet I have any if I have any at all for 't is a doubt whether I have one or not It is said of Ephraim Hos 7.11 that shee was like a silly Dove without heart Surely so am I too not for the innocency but the simple folly of the Dove for like Ephraim too I have fled from my God vers 13 But why should I be so simple as to thinke that I have noe heart Doe not I feele one with in mee Yes sure for my meate comfort 's it Gen 18.5 Pro 14.30 Ps 38.19 as Abraham desired the Angells to doe by theirs I have a sound heart which is the life of the flesh I know I have one for like Davids it panteth I can feele it beate and that 's a good signe that I have one I know too by the passions which I have in it for I am subject to joy and sorrow to love and batred to feare and courage to hope and despaire I have the seede's of all the vertues and vices in mee I have an understanding too a will and imagination and what not which others are endued with Why then doe I complaine that I have noe heart when as this very complaint ariseth from my heart Alas I have a heart indeede the heart of a woman But I want a heart yet a better heart the heart of a Christian What 's this heart to mee this poore inconsiderable heart which nature lend's mee T' is but a morsel of thick solid flesh placed in the midle belly the seate indeede of the vitall faculties the heart that preserveth the heate of the body the spring head of the arteries the chiefe author of breathing and working of the pulse a poore thing which nature was feint to take such compassion of as to wrap it in clowtes in a caule that it might lye quiet in it 's place and be kept from the violence and pressures of the neighbouring members Yea shee 's feint to dip this caule too in a kind of waterish humour and wrap it about this heart least the litle trifle should be so hot or dry that it should fall into a swoone What s' all this to mee as I am a Christian This poore thing shall have but a litle time to lye panting in my breast and then though it be the eldest enlivened member and shall linger and out-live all the rest yet at length it shall faint depart away it shall goe and make a pleasant collation for the wormes in the with-drawing chamber in the coole vault of my silent grave and so even fare them well But what then Is this all The very beasts have such a dispatch and when they are gone there 's noe more expectation of sense or any thing else Surely I who am placed upon earth as a kind of mistresse over the inferiour creatures must one day render some account to my Lord who hath thus intrusted mee When I die I must goe to another place Either I must be doomed to eternall miserie or else receaved and admitted to unspeakeable and everlasting content I am not all flesh I am some spirit God hath not confined mee to those narrow bounds of vegetation and sense Noe hee hath added reason to them and made mee a woman so that although I have a heart common with the beast according to sense yet I should have another heart too a heart a bove either them or that 1. Pet. 3 4. Deut. 11.16 Rom. 10.10 c. 2.15 Deut 29.4 1. Thes 3.13 2. Sam. 24.10 Deut 29.4 I have a reasonable soule a mind an understanding a conscience and each of these in the scripture is termed a heart but this o this is that heart which I feare I want Want it Yes I so want it that either I have it not at all or if I have it it is such a one as 't is worse for mee farr worse then if I had none at all But I have none indeede The Lord hath not given mee an heart to perceave nor eyes to ser nor eares to heare unto thit day When I pray I have none when I reade the sacred oracles of the most high I have none when I goe to the temple and should attend to the instructions of the ambassadours of Christ I have none when I should put in practise what hath arrived at my knowledg I have none when I should confer discours of God and goodnesse I have none none at all none in the church none in my closet nor in the society of the godly at noe time in noe place upō noe good occasion can I find that I have any Or if I have one I had as good be without it for 't is a dry one for want of watering it with my teares I find that 't is smitten down and withered like grasse Or 't is dead or at lest Ps 102 4. just dying at the last gaspe I have beene drunke with wickednesse very drunke as Nabal was with wine at his kingly feast but now I begin to grow a litle more sober and recollect my selfe 1. Sam 25.36 vers 37 Mat 13 15. Ps 119.70 Iam 5.5 Io 3.19 c 9.39 I find that my heart like his upon the newes which his wife tould him even dyes within mee and I am become as a stone Or if it be yet alive 't is a fatt one 't is waxed grosse 't is as fatt as grease 't is nourished as in the day of slaughter so that through the unweildines of it and through the destruction approaching it I had better be without it Or else 't is a blind one for it loveth darknesse rather
shall be greater if wee continue in our industrie This is my way and thus I will follow him Hee who sate upon the throne Reu 21 6. and said It is done I am Alpha and Omega the beginning and the end even the same Lord said I will give unto him that is a thirst of the fountaine of the water of life freely Hee inviteth mee by his Prophet and speaketh to mee among the rest when hee saith Is 55.1 Ho every one that thirsteth come yee to the waters and hee that hath noe money come and buy and eate yea come and buy wine and milke without money Reu 22 17. without price The Spirit and the Bride saith Saint Iohn say Come and let him that heareth say Come and let him that is a thirst Come and whosoever will let him take of the water of life freely I am thirstie hee hath promised therfore to mee the fountaines of the water of life I am thirstie and yet I am poore and have not wherewith to buy what I neede My deedes are wicked and of noe validitie my words are idle and deserve noe good my thoughts are sinfull cannot merit What then Shall I starve for want because I have not price to give Noe noe mee it is hee calleth unto that I may buy without money mee hee meaneth to make partaker of his promise I will buy what I want but I can give nothing but teares or at most which indeede is the best even the blood of him who was slaine for my peace But why doe I call that blood mine owne May I safely doe it Yes it was his but it is mine Because hee needed not that price as a ransome for himselfe hee gave it to mee and all the faithfull to purchase our redemption This ô father I offer unto thee upon my knees I tender it with a lowly heart and a bleeding soule and a submissive speech praying unto thee and saying The Prayer GRacious father Ps 123.1 Mat 5.45 thou that dwellest in the heavens and from heaven doest send the raine both on the just and the unjust take pitty and compassion on the meanest of thy servants who cryeth unto thee out of the depth of miserie O my God thou seest how I am dryed up with thirst and am wearie of my life for want of thy comforts I know that thou hast power to breake a clowd and canst command it to water my parched body Thou canst give mee drinke out of the windowes of heaven Gen 7.11 or canst cause the earth to answer my desires Ps 6 1. Lord rebuke mee not in thine anger neither chasten mee in thy heavy displeasure I must confesse that I have worthily deserved thy severest punishments and most justly therfore doe I feele the heate of thine anger in my burning thirst Ps 79.5 But Lord shall thy displeasure burne like fire for ever Shall it never be allayed with the shewers of my teares or with that which infinitely exceede's them both in vallew and power even the dropps of blood which fell from my Redeemer O thou who with a stroake of a rod diddest make the relenting rocks to relieve the thirstie doe thou be pleased to pittie the complaint of a fainting sinner Coole my body which burneth with heate and refresh mee now in this extreamest anguish if it may stand with thy gracious will and pleasure If thou seest it fitting that my life should be prolonged afford mee the meanes for the preservation thereof On thee alone doe I depend and to thee alone doe I addresse my supplication To thee I referre the disposing of this parched and dryed earth humbly besieching thee to bend my will to submit unto thine O let mee never utter any words of despaire or discontent but in all my groanes let mee acknowledg thy justice Holy Father be pleased to fixe my thoughts upon my inward man that my care may be greater for the spirit them the flesh I want that spirituall desire which thou requirest I thirst for that thirst My soule is drie for want of thy grace and so seered is my conscience that I know not my miseries Lord open mine eyes that I may see my wants that so my thirst may be turned into a thirst for thy mercy Thou ô God art rich but I am poore thou art filled with blessings but I am not yet so much as sensible of my want of them O give mee both a sight of my povertie and a desire of thy grace and then graunt unto thy servant according to my desires I thirst Lord I thirst after thee the well-spring yea the ocean of mercy O send mee but a drop of thy heavenly ocean that it may increase in mee a desire of enjoying thy selfe Ps 36.8 Give mee to drinke of thy pleasures as of a river that so I may referre my body to thy holy will willingly yeeld this dust to thy disposall Gen 3.19 This dust shall returne to the dust whence it came but ô let my soule be vallewed so deare in thy sight that it may here have a tast of thy bottomelesse bountie hereafter be admitted to the paradise of thee my God Reu 2.7 Heare mee ô father and graunt my requests Zech 13.1 for the worthinesse of him who opened unto mee a fountaine for sin even Iesus Christ my onely Lord and Saviour Amen soliloquy 4 THE FOURTH SOLILOQUIE Treating of Nakednesse both of the out-ward and in-ward man THE EjACULATION Psal 5. vers 1. Give eare to my words o Lord consider my meditation vers 2. Hearken unto the voice of my cry my king and my God for unto thee will I pray WHen Noah was over-come with the wine which hee had dranke sleeping hee lay un-covered in his tent Gen 9.21 vers 22 Accursed Ham saw the nakednesse of his father and tould his brethren but Shem and Iaphet tooke a garment vers 23 and laid it on both their shoulders and went back-ward and covered the nakednesse of their father and their faces were back-ward and they saw not their father's nakednesse All these were the sonnes of one and the selfe-same father but they differed in conditions as if they had not beene hrothers One was so unnaturall that hee seemed to boast in the folly of his parent and when wine had disturbed the braine of his father and the heate of the drinke had layed him naked the wicked sonne as rejoycing at his weakenesse tould his brethren the effect of the drunkennesse But the other two blushing at the effect as well as the cause modestly hid what ought to be concealed Such a Ham have I it is my poverty Onely in this it differeth from the sonne of Naoh that it first inebriateth mee and then uncovereth mee I am so intoxicated with want that it bereave's mee of my senses and being thus poore it leave 's mee naked O where shall I find a Shem or a Iaphet to cover my nakednesse I
am cloathed indeede Zech 3 3. but it is with ragges and filthy garments as bad or worse then was Ioshua when once hee stood before the Angel Such an Angel I want vers 4. as was hee who spake unto them that were before him and said Take away the filthy garments from him The cause of my shame is sinne the cause of my poverty is mine iniquity O that the Angell of the covenant would say unto mee Behold I have caused thine iniquity to passe from thee and I will cloath thee with change of raiment Mee think's I looke like the counterfeiting Gibeonites when by craft they obtained a league with Ioshua Ios 9.4 for they tooke old sacks upon their asses and wine bottells old and rent and bound up vers 5. And old shooes and clowted upon their feete and old garments upon them and all the bread of their provision was drie and mouldie Ierusalem's curse is fallen upon mee as God threatned her so am I punished Eze 16 39. I will give thee saith the Lord into thine enemies hand and they shall throw downe thine eminent place and shall breake downe thine high places they shall strippe thee allso of thy cloathes and shall take thy faire jewells and leave thee naked and bare It is thus with mee too Poverty is mine enemie into whose hands I am fallen It hath throwne downe mine eminent place it hath dejected my countenance My high places it hath broken downe my loftie thoughts and prowd imaginations It hath allso stripped mee of my clothes and tooke away my faire jewells and thus hath it left mee naked and bare The curse which David wished to his enemies hath seized on mee Ps 109 29. for I am cloathed with shame and covered with confusion as with a mantle And yet if I truely consider the state I am in I cannot deny but my sufferance is just for apt I have beene to wish evill to others and the same is fallen now upon my selfe In my passion I have beene ready to cloath my selfe with cursing vers 18 like as with a garment and it is now come into my bowells like water and like oyle into my bones O that I could bemoane my selfe of my former prosperitie as Iob did him selfe and that I could as truely say of my selfe that I put on righteousnesse and it cloathed mee Iob. 29.14 my judgment was a robe and a diadem But for want of that robe of righteousnesse I am cloathed now with the ragges of poverty in so much that I am allmost as much ashamed of the cover of my nakednesse as I am to appeare naked without a covering Where ô where is that courteous Saul 2. Sam 1.24 at whose death King David lamenting sang this Elegie Yee daughters of Israël weepe over Saul who cloathed you in scarlet with other delights who put on ornaments of gold upon your appearell Alasse here is neither scarlet nor ornaments noe nor a Saul to bestow them on mee Mat 11 8. Luc 16 19. They that weare soft cloathing are in Kings houses It is for such as Dives was to be cloathed in purple and fine linnen I can expect noe such costly coverings But is not my heart desirous of the gayest robes Is not my mind imployed in wishes for such vanities Let mee not deceave my selfe When I see another sumptously arayed doe's not the sight thereof incline mee to pride Could I not dispence with the vanity of silkes and colours and fashions if I had but meanes to purchase or procure them Doe not I honour the person for the borrowed habit and vallew more the richnesse of the cloathes then the vertue of the person I feare that my heart is not truely humbled for if I long for that which now I am denyed if my mind submitt not to the weakenesse of my fortunes it is much to be feared I am poore in habit but not in spirit But whence proceede my murmurings and discontents Why am I so desirous of sumptuous apparell Doe colours adde any thing at all to the heate Or doe onely silkes and costly stuffs preserve the body from the view of spectatours Certainly the coursest wooll which groweth on the sheepe hath power enough both to cover and to warme From whence then proceedeth the ground of my discontent Is it not from pride yea such pride as standeth not either with religion or reason Religion forbiddeth it Iam 4.6 for God resisteth the proude but giveth grace to the humble Reason contradicteth it for why should wee strive for a pompous covering and to out-vye each other in the glory of our garments when as all of us have beene equally naked at our births and shall equally returne to the earth our mother Those silkes which so highly are vallewed in our esteeme are but the intrails of a very worme which seemeth to lye as an agent for the tempter Shee seeing how vainely wee magnifie her esteeme preserveth her vallew by losse of her bowells and all to maintaine the pride of fooles But why should it reteine such respect among us as if the carkenet were much more worth then the jewell or the labour of a worme were of more account then the skinne of a Christian If wee prize the colour that 's sett on the silkes wee doate upon that which is fondly made and quickly decayed Some borrow of the tree the berrie that dye's and some of the fields the herâ—s that colour's and some of the earth that which fitt's for a tincture and yet when the choycest colours are sett on our silkes wee cannot deny them all to be staines Mee think 's the very flowers chide our madnesse for our esteeme of colours The Lillie is afraid lest wee should adore its whitenesse and the feare thereof enforceth a palenesse The Tulip blusheth at the simplnesse of our opinions and to teach us our vanity it withereth in a day Our coverings are onely remembrancers of our fall yet to increase the number of our sinnes wee have added pride to the necessitie of apparell Wee magnifie our selves in these emblemes of our disobedience and render them such honour as if wee rejoyced at our miserie Nothing upon earth offended the Creatour but onely our parents and nothing therfore save onely their off-spring doth borrow a covering It is true indeede that the wretchednesse of our condition was the parent of a vertue for modestie had noe name in the time of innocency This vertue is since become a duety but wee out-doe our commands in the excesse of our apparell But what can wee weare which properly and truely may be termed ours Or how long can that continue which wee borrow of the creatures The Parrat the Finch and the bird of Paradise all these outshine us in the varietie of colours and in their naturall glory teach us the vanitie of our imitating art Those colours which wee have are not properly ours nor can their beauty long continue for they dye
know that my God is powerfull who dwelleth in heaven This barrennesse may peradventure be sent mee in mercy allthough so heavily I take it for a judgment It may be I should faile in the duety of patience in the time of my travell or of love and care in the education of my children or I might be too fondly guiltie of doating on them so idolatrously robbe my God of his honour to conferre it wickedly on the issue of my loynes Moreover who knoweth what times of trouble may come upon the land or what destruction and desolation may be sent upon my countrie If persecution or warre should enforce mee to flee I can the better escape now I am free from children For this very cause my blessed Redeemer foretelling the distruction of the citty of Ierusalem sayd unto the women Daughters of Ierâ—salem weepe not for mee Lu 23.28 vers 29 but weepe for your selves and for your children For behold the dayes are comeing in the which they shall say Blessed are the barren and the wombe that never bare and the pappes that never gave suck So this barrennesse may bring content in that it freeth mee from cares and various perturbations although if it might seeme good in the eyes of my God most willingly would I embrace the trouble that I might increase his Kingdome I will resolve howsoëver to submit my selfe to the greate disposer and will hope that it may be his pleasure to send mee my desires Time was when the Gentiles knew not God which made the Psalmist so magnifie God for his mercies to Israël Ps 147.19 when hee sayd Hee sheweth his word unto Iacob his statutes and his judgments unto Israël vers 20 Hee hath not dealt so with any nation neither have the heathen knowledg of his law Then had the Gentiles a spirituall barrennesse for they were barren of religion and yet the Prophet comforteth them Is 54.1 saying Sing ô barren thou that didest not beare breake forth into singing and cry alowd thou that didst not travell with child for more are the children of the desolate then the children of the maried wife saith the Lord. This Prophesie is fullfilled to the joy and rejoycing of my selfe and many millions more for the song doeth noe longer runne in the phrase of the Psalmist Ps 76.1 ves 2. In Iudah is God knowne his name is greate in Israel In Salem allso is his tabernacle and his dwelling place in Sion Noe noe Lu 2.32 hee who was the glory of the people Israel did come to be a light to lighten the Gentiles Thus the Gentiles which had not beene a people Rom. 9 25. were called to be the people of the most high God shee who had not beene beloved did through his mercy become the beloved of God and shee that was barren through ignorance and infidelitie grew the faithfull spouse of the most high Why should I then give over my hopes Hee who made a fruitfull church even of the heathen which knew him not Is 54.3 can if hee pleaseth make mee a fruitfull mother of children verf 5. Her maker is her husband the Lord of hosts is his name and her redeemer is the holy one of Israel the God of the whole earth shall hee be called I am one of the members of that church which hath Christ to her husband I will therfore never despaire either of his power or mercy I dare not repine as Rachel did when shee bare Iacob noe children and envyed her sister Gen 34 1. vers 2. I dare not say to my husband as shee did to hers Give mee children or else I dye lest his anger should be kindled against mee and hee should answer mee as Iacob did her and say Am I in God's steed who hath withheld from thee the fruit of the wombe I know it is God who giveth and I know it is God who withholdeth these mercies I dare not be too inquisitive into a reason in nature lest I dis-honour him who is the God of nature I may and I will desire this blessing at the hands of him who giveth liberally Iam 1.5 and upbraideth not Yet lest my petitions should be empty if they rise not with teares I will weepe for my sinnes which have caused his displeasure and yet I will weepe in hope that hee will be reconciled unto mee Of every judgment I must find the cause in the wickednesse of my selfe I want the comfort and content of children because I my selfe have beene a child disobedient to my God But I will bewayle my sinnes and bemoane my condition and allthough hee cannot be ignorant of my servent desires yet I will lay open to him the griefe of my heart Gen 25 21. Isaak intreated him for his wife because shee was barren and hee was intreated of him and Rebekah his wife conceaved And shee had two children which strugled together in their mother's wombe ver 22 At the prayer of Elisha the good Shunamitish woman conceaved 2. King 4.17 Gen 20 17. and bare a sonne at that very season that Elisha had sayd unto her according to the time of life Faithfull Abraham prayed unto the Lord and the Lord healed Abimelech and his wife and his mayd servants and they bare children vers 18 for the Lord had first closed up all the wombes of the house of Abimelech because of Sarah Abrahams wife The Lord did promise unto Israël upon obedience saying There shall nothing cast their young Ex. 23.26 Deut. 7 12. nor be barren in thy land Another promise was made unto them by God himselfe when hee sayd It shall come to passe if yee hearken to these judgments and doe them Thou shalt be blessed above all people there shall not be male or female barren among you or among your cattell Againe they were promised by the mouth of Moses saying It shall come to passe c. 28.1 if thou shalt hearken diligently unto the voyce of the Lord thy God to observe and to doe all the commandements which I command thee this day vers 11 the Lord shall make thee plenteous in goods in the fruit of thy body and in the fruit of thy cattell and in the fruit of thy ground in the land which the Lord sware unto thy fathers to give thee But I have not such an Isaak to intreate for mee as Rebekah had nor such an Elisha as the Shunamitesse had nor such an Abraham as Abimelech had What then I have the promise of my God if I be a true Israëlite indeede Io. 1.47 such a one as Nathaniel was in whom was noe guile If I obey my God and hearken to his judgments and doe them If I hearken diligently unto the voyce of the Lord my God to observe and to doe all the commandements which hee commandeth mee to doe then I may expect the blessing which was promised unto Israël The promises of God are made upon conditions
and this child have dyed so should the teares which I had shed through the extreamitie of my pangs be seconded with more for the losse of my desires In all these mercies I must looke up to my Redeemer and acknowledg him the father and donour of these blessings I will therfore magnifie him for his goodnesse and praise him for his loving-kindnesse Ps 106 1. I will give thankes unto the Lord for hee is gratious because his mercy endureth for ever The Prayer O Mercifull God heavenly father who hast now most especially made knowne unto mee Eph 3.20 that thou art able to doe exceeding aboundantly above all that wee aske or thinke make mee thankfully rejoyce in the worke of thy love and thy tender mercie Thy favours are greate and wonderfull in sparing the life of my selfe mine infant in freeing mee from my pangs and him from the darknesse of the silent wombe Thine ô Lord is the power by which I am delivered thine is the mercy by which I am safely returned unto my bed thine is the worke of the frame and fashion of this my babe thine therfore shall be likewise the glory for ever and ever Graunt blessed Father that I may never sorget thy goodnesse but expresse my thankfullnesse in my new obedience Make mee carefull in the performance of what service I promised thee in the extreamitie of mine anguish As thou hast given mee the fruit of my body to the joy of my heart so give mee the fruit of righteousnesse sowen in peace Iam 3.18 vers 17 Give mee the wisedome which is from above that is full of good workes without hypocrisie Lord make mee thy servant by grace and make this child thy child by adoption and mercy Give mee comfort in his life for the sorrowes which I endured at his birth Gal 1.15 Seperate him from the wombe as thou didst Saint Paul that hee may be a chosen vessell of sanctification and honour Teach mee innocency and simplicitie by the example of this infant and make mee hereafter teach him goodnesse and righteousnesse by the power of thy grace Make us allways children in wickednesse 1. Cor. 14.20 1. Pet 2.2 Gal 4.19 but not in understanding that so as new borne babes wee may desire the sincere milke of thy word that wee may grow thereby Let thy sonne Christ be formed in this litle infant that as it hath beene preserved by thy power and providence in the first birth so it may feele thy mercy and grace in the second Lord give a blessing to whatsoëver shall be used for the recovery of my strength that I may allways praise thee both in prosperitie and adversitie Give thy blessing to the meanes for the nourishment of this child Give it strength that it may live to receave the seale of thy mercy in the laver of Baptisme and doe thou be present with thy blessing when the signe shall be administred Lu 2.52 O let it live if it be thy blessed will and grow up in wisedome and in stature and in grace both with thee and with men that so I may magnifie thy name for making mee an instrument to propagate the number of thine elect who am the weakest and the unworthiest of women Increase thy Kingdome daâ—ly Take pittie upon all that suffer afflictions especially on those women who are in labour of children Give them comfort in the time of their miseries ease from their torments joy in their desired issue and thankfullnesse for thy blessings Lord graunt that both I they may sing praises to thy name for the greatnesse of our deliverances and expresse our thanks in our godly lives that when this painfull life shall have an end wee may sing tryumphantly in eternall glory through Iesus Christ our onely Lord and Saviour Amen 13. THE THIRTEENTH SUBJECT Teares in the time of a generall Pestilence The Soliloquie Consisting of sixe severall parts and treating of 1 Mourning by example in a publike calamitie 2 Severall causes of God's visitations 3 Sinne especially the cause of the Pestilence 4 Severall examples of dreadfull Pestilences 5 God's threatning before his visitation 6 The duety of a Christian decreeing both to whom and for whom wee ought to pray in the time of Pestilence The first part of the Soliloquie treating of mourning by example in a publike calamitie THE EjACULATION Psal 5. vers 1. Give eare to my words ô Lord consider my meditation vers 2. Hearken unto the voyce of my cry my king and my God for unto thee will I pray THe heart of the wise is in the house of mourning Eccl 7.4 saith Solomon but the heart of fooles is in the house of mirth Is the heart then sometimes in a pilgrimage from the body Or is the body required to visit the sick yea though the disease be infectious Or are wee allways by command Ps 42.3 to imitate the Prophet whose teares were his meate day and night The heart indeede is often from home and is least where it liveth most where it loveth The sick must be visited or else my Saviour will complaine as hee doth in the Gospel saying I was sick Mat 25 43. Iob 2.11 and yee visited mee not When Iob's three friends heard of the evill that was come upon him they came every one from his owne place for they had made an appointment together to come to mourne with him and to comfort him vers 13 So they sate downe with him upon the ground 2. King 13.14 and mourned seaven dayes and seaven nights When Elisha was fallen sick of his sicknesse wherewith hee dyed Ioash the King of Israël came downe unto him and wept over his face and said O my father my father the charet of Israel and the horse-men thereof c 8.29 When wicked King Ioram went to be healed in Iezreel of the wounds which the Syrians had given him at Ramah Ahaziah the sonne of heboram King of Iudah went downe to see him in Iezreel because hee was sick Thus doe I reade of a holy Patient visited by friendly mourners a holy Prophet visited by a weeping King a wicked King visited by another as wicked as himselfe All these were visiters or visited but I doe not find that the diseases were infectious Noe I must therfore imitate the best of them in my charitie to others but I may not forget charity to my selfe Willfully to runne into apparent danger is desperately to tempt the keeper of Israel What shall I then doe The passing bells informe mine eares of the mortalitie of my neighbours yet I cannot I must not visit them What I say shall I doe What course shall I take Charitie commandeth mee compassion hasteneth mee to the dying Christians that by my advice or at least by my prayers I might expresse my commiseration And yet when I am just at my doore provided resolved intended to goe even then mine owne health the health of my familie and which is
out Ier 23.9 and say Mine heart within mee is broken all my bones shake I am like a drunken man and like a man whom wine hath over-come because of the Lord because of the word of his holinesse Here I find the Prophet in a strange and fervent passion in a trembling exstasie yet not too greate if I consider the cause if I weigh the verse that immediately ensueth For the land saith hee is full of adulterers vers 10. for because of swearing or cursing the land mourneth the pleasant places of the wildernesse are dryed up and their course is evill and their force is not right Was Ierusalem thus visited for swearing and cursing Was Samaria thus burnt up with drought for adulterie Lord what then hath not this land deserved An oath in every tongue causeth a crosse upon every doore Vncleanenesse in every person causeth the fowlest sores in every patient The sinns are universall the punisbment must needes therfore be as universall The punishment is become generall ô that our sorrow would grow as generall This disease may be cured by lotion For my part therfore I will be the first that shall steppe into Bethesda Io 5.2 for I have layne the longest in my sinnes long have I allso wayted for the salvation of my God I will imitate the Prophet Ieremiah and cry out with him and as truely as hee Mine heart is broken example 2 Why did the Prophet Micah resolve to Wayle and to howle to goe stript and naked Mic 2.8 to make a wayling like the Dragons and mourning as the Owles vers 3. Was it not because the Lord was comeing forth out of his place comeing downe to tread upon the high places of the earth Was it not because the mountaines should be vers 4. molten under him and the valleys be cleft as waxe before the fire and as the waters that are powred downe a steepe place Here was destruction for Samaria and ruine for Ierusalem vers 5. but all this was for the transgression of Iacob and for the sinnes of the house of Israel The graven images were the sinnes of the people idolatrie incensed the wrath of the All mighty Well might hee punish when the worke of men's hands robbed him of his honour whose worke-man-ship wee are Well might hee resolve to be knowne the mighty God in his revenge whom they would not acknowledge to be God when hee forbore them But is it not just so with us as it was with them vers 5. Is not Samaria the sinne of Is not Samaria the sinne of our Iacob Are not the high places of Iudah our Ierusalem Here is wrath and wrath and plague and plague but is not idolatrie still in our gates The God of the Patriarch saith unto us Gen. 35.2 as Iacob did unto his house-hould and to all that were with him Put away the strange gods that are among you If therfore wee have still a noise of the beades of the chaplets pretended to be consecrated at Rome if wee have pictures worshipped crucifixes adored prayers not understood and other footesteps of the heathen remaining amongst us I cannot choose but remember what our incensed Creatour saith by his Prophet concerning the sinnes of the Iewes Ier. 9.9 Shall I not visit them for these things saith the Lord Shall not my soule be avenged on such a nation as this Lord where thou art not truely worshipped thou wilt be dreadfully feared Though this sinne be not generall though not universall amongst us is it not to be found in private Doeth it not lurke in private closetts Is it not harboured in some secret hearts Io 3.30 It hateth the light because it is not the trueth but yet our sinnes may multiply in the darke untill they have brought us to the land of darkenesse O that with Iacob wee would all arise Gen 35.3 and goe up to Bethel and make there an alter unto our God then wee know hee would answer us in our distresse This is our plague this is our punishment which now doeth rage amongst us and is not that our sinne Is not that our iniquitie What remaineth but that so farre as lyeth in mee I should strive to appease the wrath of my God I will therfore endeavour to blunt his arrow that it may stick noe more when hee shooteth it at us I will pray unto him to remove at once both the sinne and the punishment I will doe as did Micah I will wayle and howle I will wayle like the Dragons and mourne like the Owles example 3 When Ezra had confessed the sinne of the people weeping Ezra 10.1 and casting himselfe downe before the house of God there assembled unto him out of Israël a very greate congregation of men and women and children and the people wept very sore What ayled the Priest to cast himselfe downe and the people so sorely to weepe were they not come out of captivitie Were they not busied in reedifying the house of the Lord Were not their burnt offerings and their sacrifices made unto the God of Israël What now should deject them What should dismay them The Lord questioneth Cain the murderer Gen 4.6 the fratricide saying Why is thy countenance fallen If thou doest well shalt thou not be accepted vers 7. And if thou doest not well sinne lyeth at the doore Thus might Iudah and Benjamin be likewise examined They had a sinne that lay at the doore yea neerer clâ—ser to them if possible might be even in their beds Ezr 9.1 in their bosomes They had not seperated themselves from the people of the lands and from doeing according to their abominations but they had taken of their daughters for themselves vers 2. and for their sonnes yea the hand of the Princes and rulers had beene chiefe in this trespasse Yet for all this their punishment was not hitherto come upon them to the full They had yet but a sprinkeling of it onely some droppes or at most but a gust a small storme a shewer or two of raine When the Lord was angry the clowdes frowned they knitt their browes and as it were in the aboundance of their compassion c 10.9 they dissolved into teares for the sinnes of the people But more vengeance was expected therfore the children of the captivitie turned away their wives vers 14 that the fierce wrath of God for this matter might be turned from them If such a sinne as this be the cause of this our dreadfull visitation wee ought allso with them to sit in the streete of the house of God trembling vers 9. because of this matter Whether this or whatsoëver else is the cause of this contagion the sinne of this land for my part I will resolve with the same Ezra to sit astonied at the sinnes of the land c 9.4 and with the people I will tremble at the words of the God of Israël because of the transgressions of
the people of this land I will not arise from my heavinesse vers 5. Ioël 2.13 But I will rent my garment or rather my heart and not my garment and turne unto the Lord my God for hee is gracious and mercifull slow to anger and of great kindnesse and repenteth him of the evill I will fall upon my knees Ezr. 9.5 and spread out my hands unto the Lord my God example 4 Zion was threatned that her gates should lament and mourne and that she being desolate Is 3.26 should sit on the ground Here was the punishment a grievous punishment desolation by warre destruction by the sword vers 25 Her men should fall by the sword and her mighty men in the warre But what was the cause What stirred up the All-mighty to shewer downe his vengeance Alas it is too easily found The pride of the woman was the destruction of the men vers 16 It was because the daughters of Zion were haughty and walked with stretched-out necks and wanton eyes walking and mincing as they went and making a tinkling with their feete Wee are punished wee are afflicted not by the sword but which is more dreadfull by the Pestilence Our sufferances are not in the same manner indeede as were theirs and yet wee deserve both the manner and the measure Our sinnes are alike our punishments must therfore be expected alike alike in the greatnesse though they are not in the kind They seeme mee think's allready to agree in part for besides our sicknesses Mat 24 6. wee heare of warres and rumours of wars Yea they come yet neerer alike Is 3.17 for they were threatned that the Lord should smite them with a scab on the crowne of the head of the daughters of Zion and this very judgment appeareth among us in every blaine in every botch in every carbuncle Surely our sinnes are as greate or greater then theirs The pride of our sexe in their dresses in their laces in their jewells in their fashions in their gaites in their behaviours in their attendants in every thing is greater then Zion's The effects of pride their lascivious embracings their amorous â—urtings are commoner are frequenter then Zion's vers 18 Lord is it not just with thee then to take away from us as thou didest â—…om Zion the braverie of our tinkling â—naments and our tyres and our chaines vers 19 vers 21 vers 22 vers 23 and our bracelets and our rings and our changeable suits of apparell and our manâ—les and our glasses and our fine linnen and our hoods and our vailes Wee may most justly indeede expect a stinke vers 24 insteed of a sweete smell and instead of a girdle a â—ent and instead of well-set haire baldâ—esse and instead of a stomacher a girdle of sack-cloth and burning instead of beauty For us the land mourneth for our pride he people are humbled for our sinnes the Pestilence reigneth Lord make us all with Zion lament and mourne make us fit on the ground acknowledging thy justice and our sinfullnesse Eze. 31 15. God hath come downe to the grave among us as hee did at the destruction of Assyria for the pride thereof and caused Libanon to mourne for us and the trees of the field to faint for us therfore with Zion I will lament I will mourne I will sit on the ground example 5 A voyce was once heard from the high places of Israël Ier 3.21 weeping and supplications of the people because they had perverted their way they had forgotten the Lord their God Here was sorrow at the heart for the sinne of the soule and yet noe destruction of the body threatned for disobedience Had they continued in this their repentance they might have prevented the ensueing judgments but intermission of sorrow proved to be the ground of their sorrow Hence came theâ— land to be cursed with barrennesse and the Prophet to cry out c 12.4 How long shall the land mourne and the herbes of every field wither for the wickednesse of them that dwell thereinâ— Here wickednesse was the cause and barrennessâ— the effect But why should the herbes and flowers of the field suffer for the sinnes of the people Alas they grew up towards heaven in their gratefull acknowledgment that from thence they receaved their nourishment in the earth Yea so innocent they were that when they looked about them and saw as it were the wickednesse of them for whose service they were made every morning hung pearlie teares upon their drooping eyes and when they saw that men had not halfe so much remorse as they themselves they sadly shrunke to bed againe in the earth It was a curse to them to be enslaved in the service of cursed sinnes so poisonous is transgression so mischievous is iniquitie Thus the herbes were cursed for the sinnes of the Iewes but what had the Iewes done amisse which wee have not exceeded What wickednesse had they committed which wee have not surpassed Therfore our herbes and our flowers the beauty of our gardens and the pride of our knotts is nipped is withered with the poisonous breath that ariseth from our infected bodies and yet wee feare that what wee dispatched the aire to kill in our gardens will bring poison to us and slay us in our houses Thus wee suffer for thus have wee finned I will therfore resolve with the Prophet David Ps 119 136. that Rivers of waters shall runne downe mine eyes because wee have not kept the â—aw of our God example 6 Shall not the land tremble for this Amos. 8.8 and every â—…e mourne that dwelleth therein Saith the Prophet Amos. Tremble For what Israël knew well enough the poore were sensible enough vers 6. even the poore that were bought for silver and the needy that were sould for a paire of shooes Here was oppression in the streetes and crying in the gates vers 5. for the Ephah was made small and the Shekel greate and the ballances were falsified by deceit Noe marveile that the Psalmist concludeth Ps 62.9 Surely men of low degree are vanitie and men of high degree are a lye to be layed in the ballance they are alltogether lighter then vanitie It was thus among the Israelites and thus it is among us allso Men of low degree are vanitie vanitie in the account and contempt of superiours vanitie in the cruelty of superiours Men of high degree the richest traders the merchants of corne and the other fruits of the earth are a lye their measures are false theâ— weights are false yea they buy by one and they sell by another They devoure their brethren and yet they doe it by aâ— shew of Iustice for the ballances they haw corrupted and the weights they have pared insomuch as men erre most they are most deceaved when they thinke themselves most righted best dealt with This injustie commandeth us justly to mourne so the belly cryeth and the back cryeth The
hungrie cry when they buy of the rich and are cozened by the rich when they suffer in the cozenage and suffer likewise in the publike in the generall punishment for the cozenage For this our land mourneth for this our people are visited our houses are shut up our streetes are not frequented ouâ— markets not filled and yet the hungry lament and the thirstie doe mourne The poore can neither buy for their money not be imployed in their willing labours to earne them money Is 59.11 nor live without money Wee roare all like Beares and mourne sore like Doves Wee looke for judgment but there is none for salvatien but it is farre from us Therfore with the oppressed I will cry and with the visited allso I will cry I will cry with the oppressed for right and I will cry with â—…e visited for health How long Lord â—ow long wilt thou punish us c. 44.22 O remove â—…ur sinnes like a cloude blott out as a thick cloude our transgressions and as a cloude our sinnes returne unto us for thou hast redeemed us part 3 The Third part of the Soliloquie shewing that Sinne especially is the cause of the Pestilence THe diseased ignorant of the kind of their maladies cause the Phisitian 〈◊〉 consult with their pulses to examine their â—rine and by symptomes to find out the â—ause of their disturbance So should the sick soule allso or else the ignorance of the sinne may hinder the cure Generall complaints have beene made by men groaning under the burdens of severall visitations but doeth the Pestilance come by the same rules and arise from the same causes Surfeits and Consumptions and Feavers and Palsies and Plurisies and other such sicknesses may have their causes in nature and their remedies oftentimes by physick but neither is the cause of the Pestilence so cleere in nature nor is the cure thereof so easie by physick Or if it be yet is this disease more infectious more mortall and therfore more dreadfull then any of the rest It shall therfore be my first care to find out the cause in my soule before I looke upon the effects thereof in the bodies of sinfull mortalls I will examine our times by those of our ancestours and see whether this generall contagion doeth not rather proceede from the mallice of the soule then from the aire dyet or whatsoever else the Phisitians conjecture at The men which Moses had sent to spie out the land of Canaan returned 1. Num 14.36 and made all the congregation to murmur against Moses by bringing up a slaunder upon that land of promise those very men that did bring up that evill report upon the land vers 37 dyed of the plague before the Lord. What Of the plague Of the Pestilence There were but ten of those spies and those ten onely dyed Wee have the Pestilence too but it contenteth not it selfe with ten ten and ten and ten but hundreds dye hundreds are visited thousands complaine every one feareth But was their disease the same as ours Was not theirs an inflammation of their tongues and wormes issueing out of them as a just recompenseâ— because with their tongues they had lyed Or was it not some other extraordinarie plague from the hand of God Or was it not that Pestilence which was threatned when the Lord said unto Moses vers 11 How long will this people provoke mee and how long will it be ere they believe mee for all the signes which I have shewed among them vers 12 I will smite them with the Pestilence and disinherit them and will make of thee a greater nation mightier then they Whatsoever their disease was though I cannot determine it yet will I consider the cause thereof The cause was a sinne a grievous sinne a lye and the effect of this was a sinne a grievous sinne it was murmuring O thus have wee allso added sinnes unto sinnes Wee allso lye wee lye grievously desperately impudently Like unto Iob's friends wee are forgers of lyes Iob. 13.4 Ps 40.4 Ps 58.3 Ps 62.4 Eze. 24 12. Hos 10 13. wee turne aside to lyes wee goe astray so soone as wee be borne and speake lyes wee delight in lyes and wee have wearied our selves with lyes justly therfore now doe wee eate the fruit of lyes And yet not contented with this wee murmur too Against our superiours wee murmur for not governing us according to our licentious and sinfull desires against the rich wee murmur because wee floate not in their plentie yea even against God himselfe wee murmur because hee graunteth not our sinfull desires Thus in every thought and in every word wee either find a sinne or make a sinne For this our lying for this our murmuring wee are now visited wee are now stricken wee are as those spies were destroyed of the destroyer 1. Cor. 10.10 The rebellious Israëlites were threatned by Moses that Every sicknesse 2. Deut. 28.61 every plague which was not written in the booke of the law them should the Lord bring upon them untill they were destroyed vers 62 And they should be left few in number whereas they were as the starres of heaven for multitude These were the menaces these were the threats to the children of Israël but among all these sicknesses where is that which reigneth among us Hath God prepared a new punishment for us such as the Israëlites never suffered nor the law ever mentioned nor skill ever cured Doubtlesse thus God could afflict us but hee chuseth rather to punish us as hee did others that so wee might find out the cause as others have done Hee was pleased to tell the Israëlites the cause of their plague which hee would send upon them vers 62 even Because they would not obey the voyce of the Lord their God Iust thus hee punisheth us as hee punished them even untill wee are allmost quite destroyd and hee telleth us our sinne our offence too by his word by his ministers by our owne consciences even that wee refuse to obey the voyce of the Lord. Iust therfore most just it is that seeing wee have wee doe wee will thus sinne even thus yea thus severely likewise wee should be punished Yea wee deserve it in a farre greater manner in a sarre greater measure Hee who threatned those that would walke contrarie unto him and would not hearken unto him Lev 26 21. that hee would bring seaven times more plagues upon them according to their sinnes Hee who by Moses threatned them that If they would not observe to doe all the words of that law which are written in that booke Deut 28.58 that they might feare this glorious name The Lord thy God vers 59 Then the Lord should make their plagues wonderfull and the plagues of their seede even greate plagues and of long continuance and sore sicknesses and of long continuance The selfe-same God hath found us walking contrarie unto him and therfore hath
brought on us seaven times more plagues then formerly Hee seeth that wee feare not this glorious name The Lord our God therfore hath hee sent us greate plagues of long continuance and sore sicknesse of long continuance Thus I sitt and muse and consider of the sicknesse I heare the bells tolling even those bells which were wont to invite us to the temple that wee might know our sinnes at the mouth of the preacher and pray for remission of our sinnes by the helpe of the preacher the very selfe-same bells serve now to tell mee that one man lyeth languishing and desireth my prayers another man is departed and wanteth nothing but a funerall a third man is to be buried but a neighbourly and friendly companie is wanting Every stroake of a bell mee think's hitteth mee at the heart and biddeth mee to prepare for my last fare-well Every toul awakeneth my conscience and biddeth mee remember what my sinnes have merited Thus mine eares receave a sound and thus my trembling heart feeleth a throb a heating a panting for my particular sinnes which have beene some cause of this generall sicknesse Moses went unto the Lord 3. Ex 32.31 and sayd Oh this people have sinned a greate sinne and have made them Gods of gold But what followed The Lord plagued the people vers 35 because they worshipped the Calse which Aaron had made There was the sinne there was the punishment But was that plague the same as this which now doeth rave and rage amongst us Surely our sinnes are the same as were theirs for wee digge the entrailes of our mother earth and like the Augures the Sooth-sayers though they sayd noe sooth noe trueth at all wee conjecture wee divine by those entrailes yea and wee decree him who is rich to be a good man a fufficient man an honest man and what not Wee vallew the man for the gold wee worship him for it wee honour him for it And is not this to sinne with the Israëlites Wee doe very litle differ from those idolaters even nothing at all They made them Gods of gold and wee make gold our God Iustly therfore are wee thus punished by the true God because wee honour that which is noe God The Israelites had this very kind and sort of plague such a very pestilence as ours and for just such a sinne as this of ours Though Moses prayed for them yea though hee desired to be blotted out of the booke of God vers 32 rather then they should not be forgiven yet God decreed saying vers 33 Whosoëver hath sinned against mee him will I blott out of my booke Whosoëver hath sinned against him If hee should deale so with us who should people the land Who should inhabit our dwellings Who should enjoy our treasures Hee hath begun blotting indeede allready His inke is found in the blacknesse of every blaine in the blewnesse of every token in the rednesse of every crossed doore But will this blotting allwayes continue Will hee not stay his hand Will his wrath burne like fire for ever Ps 141.7 Our bones lye scattered at the graves mouth as when one cutteth and cleaveth wood upon the earth vers 8. But mine eyes are unto thee ô God the Lord in thee is my trust Either blott not at all or onely blott out our offences Hide thy face from our sinns and blott out all our iniquities Say unto every one of us as thou diddest unto Iacob by the mouth of thy Prophet I Is 43.25 even I am hee that blotteth out thy transgressions for mine owne name's sake and will not remember thy sinnes The Fourth part of the Soliloquie consisting of Severall examples of dreadfull Pestilences LOrd what a hideous dinne is this in mine eares There was a groane able to have shaken even the earth it selfe had it beene imprisoned in the deepest bowells thereof What another Hearke There 's weeping too Oh this is the sad and wearisome life of us poore sinners who are caged and miewed up in our infected citties and townes and villages The diseased groane through the extreamitie of their paines and for want of comforts both of body and soule The sound are weeping for the miseries of the sick and long for the deliverance even of their whole familes from the burden of the flesh Some habitations are made both hospitalls and charnell houses where many a one lyeth sick and for want of helpe they sicken without hope they dye without comfort and they consume without interment Sometimes againe the mother who dandled her infant in her clasping armes is enforced in those armes to carrie it to the grave Sometimes the husband who deerely affected the wife of his bosome is enforced to make her the burden of his shoulders and to beare her dead corps to the devouring earth for want of friends neighbours to ease him of the burden Yea sometimes the children are enforced to assist their father in the cariage of their mother to her longest home O horrour horrour horrour Can pittie find noe enterance at the hearts of strangers Can compassionfind noe harbour in the bowells of neighbours Will none performe this act of pietie to key-cold woman to the carkeise of a woman but onely her husband the husband of her affection and her children the labour and the fruit of her wombe O how divers in the world would stand amazed at the sight hardly determine whether the dropps which fall from the faces of the bearers be the sweate of their browes or the teares of their eyes Oh what adreadfull time is this Did ever any age produce a paralell to this severe contagion Was it ever knowne that a Pestilence was so generall and so malignant Did ever any people drinke so deepe of the cup of sorrow astonishment Eze 23 33. vers 4. and desolation as wee doe Was ever Samaria or Aholah or Aholibah or Babylon or Ierusalem Ier 25.20 was ever the king of the land of the Philistines or Askelon or Azzah or Ekron vers 21 or Ashdod was ever Edom or Moab or Ammon or Tyrus or Zidon vers 22 was ever Dedan or Tema vers 23 or any other place so drunke with the cup of furie from the Lords hands as wee are Hos 4.18 Our drinke was formerly sowre with our whoredomes with our abominations now therfore wee have waters of gall to drinke Ier 8.14 c 23.15 c 25.15 Eze 39 17. vers 18 vers 19 Lam 1.12 wee are fed with wormewood and our cup is a cup of furie of trembling and of astonishment O the plague the plague it is that eateth our flesh and drinketh our blood it eateth the flesh of the mighty and drinketh the blood of Princes it drinketh even untill it is drunken with our blood Was there ever any sorrow like unto our sorrow where with the Lord doeth afflict us in this day of his fierce wrath But why doe I thus cry out Why
and have mercy upon us Lord be thou our helper O be thou our helpe in trouble for vaine is the helpe of man part 5 The Fifth part of the Soliloquie shewing how God threatneth before his visitation IT is a weakenesse it is a fondnesse it is a madnesse in people not to believe the sure effects of certaine causes before they become obvious to their senses In the course of nature wee are apt to believe what wee dare not try Who will put his finger into the fire to try if it will burne Who will cast himselfe into the water to try whether it will drowne him Yet in things divine wee are too incredulous too full of un-beliefe I find that my God hath stricken divers with plagues for the sinnes which they have committed But I likewise find that hee hath threatned divers before hee visited them that so by their amendment they might prevent those judgments which otherwise would ensue It is my best way to find out the crying sinnes of the land by observing the punishments which are sent us for them but I must not forget either the patience of our God or the obstinacie of men the long-suffering of our Creatour or the impenitencie of his creatures Sure I am that the Lord did allways call to repentance before hee punished offenders hee hath ever wooed transgressours both by promises and by threatnings before hee ever made them sick in smiting them for their transgressions Mic 6.13 example 1 When the Israëlites were to be freed from the Egyptian bondage ô how often was Pharaoh admonished to let them goe Moses and Aaron sayd unto him The God of the Hebrewes hath met with us Ex 5.3 let us goe wee pray thee three dayes journie into the desert and sacrifice to the Lord our God lest hee fall upon us with the Pestilence or with the sword Lord how meeke Moses begged for the people yea and in the name of God too and for an act of religion too and for feare of judgments too yea and those judgments not small or triviall for they should be either the Pestilence or the sword yea and hee pretendeth that those judgments should fall upon the Israelites the people of God if they neglect their sacrifices hee saith not upon the Egyptians hee saith not upon the King And yet for all this the King yeelded not the Israelites sacrificed not and therfore the plagues the vengeance came upon the heads of their oppressours example 2 Gog was threatned for a thing which yet hee was suffered to doe The Israelites were to be his purchase Eze 38.11 the un-walled villages his pray all that dwelled without walls and had neither barres nor gates should be made desolate by him Thus the people of God were to suffer for the sinnes committed against their God But was the enemie to escape by whom the people should be corrected Was Gog to be enriched and to enjoy the spoyle Nothing lesse The very instrument of revenge was not to be freed from the wrath of the revenger nor the executioner to be accounted innocent though hee punished the guilty vers 22 I will pleade against him with pestilence saith the Lord and with blood I will raine upon him and upon his bands and upon the many people that are with him an over-flowing raine and greate hailestones fire and brimstone Thus the Israelites offended and were threatned with the armies of Gog. Gog offended in that hee knew not his maker in that hee looked onely to his advantage and spoyles whilest yet hee executed the vengeance of God hee 's therfore threatned hee shall therfore be consumed When hee should have revenged God upon the rebellious people then God himselfe would be revenged upon him with judgments from heaven example 3 The Prophet Ezekiel was sent to threaten the Israëlites for their many rebellions and thus sayd the Lord God unto him Eze 6.11 Smite with thine hand and stampe with thy foote and say Alas for all the evill abominations of the house of Israël for they shall fall by the sword by the famine and by the pestilence vers 12 Hee that is farre off shall dye of the pestilence and hee that is neere shall fall by the sword and hee that remaineth and is besieged shall dye by the famine thus will I accomplish my fury upon them Here is warning given before the blow be stricken there is the sword allready halfe out here is the famine allready in a due preparation here is an Angel ready to disperse the pestilence but before execution here is notice given before the punishment here is a threatning sent Even thus allso hath our good God dealt with us thus hath hee warned us Eze 33 11. Hee who delighteth not in the death of a sinner doeth never strike before notice given for hee had rather that our repentance should quiver his arrowes then that by our sinnes hee should be enforced to hit us at the heart example 4 I will smite the inhabitants of this citty saith God by Ieremiah concerning Ierusalem both man Ier 21.6 and beast they shall dye of a greate Pestilence Loe here is still the future tense I will not I doe God delighteth not in the execution of his wrath but yet his I will is as sure as his I doe Thus hee hath formerly threatned us with his I will I confesse indeede hee hath and yet wee would not believe what was to come onely because wee found it not instantly present Hence it is that now our people cry now our beastes doe roare and it is but just that men and women should be ranked in the order with beastes seeing that our sinnes have discovered us to be more stupid then them Yet the beasts perish though they could not sinne and wee perish because wee can doe noe-thing but sinne So the servant suffereth for the offences of the master so the beasts are punished for the sinnes of the owners The Pestilence putteth noe distinction betweene them both allthough the one could not the other would not avoyde the punishment example 5 In the booke of Exodus the Lord saith concerning Pharaoh Ex 9.15 the Egyptians Now I will stretch out mine hand that I may smite thee and thy people with Pestilence and thou shalt be cut off from the earth Take heede Pharaoh hee is true who threatneth and allthough hee saith I will yet hee saith allso now I will Hee is ready for thee allthough thy heart be not ready for him hee is just now prepared to punish if thou be not just now prepared to obey I will bring a sword upon you Lev 26 25. that shall avenge the quarrell of my covenant and when yee are gathered together in your citties I will send the Pestilence among you and yee shall be delivered into the hand of your enemies saith the Lord to the Israëlites And againe Deut 28.21 The Lord shall make the Pestilence to cleave to
healeth Ex 15.26 Psl 6.2 Have mercy therfore upon mee ô Lord for I am weake ô Lord heale mee for my bones are vexed Ps 41.3 Ier 17.14 Strengthen mee now upon my bed of languishing make thou all my bed in my sicknesse Heale mee o Lord and I shall be healed save mee and I shall be saved for thou art my praise c 30.12 O let not my bruise be incurable though my wound be grievous Let mee have one to pleade my cause vers 13 even that Holy One thine onely begotten Sonne that hee may bind mee up and give mee healing medicines Thou art hee who didst promise Iacob to correct him in measure vers 11 though not to leave him altogether unpunished Thou rebukest mee for my sinne Ps 39.11 and makest my beauty to consume away like as it were a moath fretting a garment These Markes in my flesh doe cause a trembling even in my spirit Rev 13.17 Ps 86.16 Lord graunt that upon my soule be not found the marke of the beast but the marke of thy sonne that hee may owne mee for his O turne thou unto mee and have mercy upon mee give thy strength unto thy servant and save thy distressed hand-mayd Shew now some good token for good vers 17 that it may appeare unto the world that thou Lord doest helpe mee and comfort mee But if in thy secret purpose thou hast decreed at this time to gather mee unto my fathers make mee with joy comfort to render mine account unto thee the Lord of heaven earth Looke not upon the sinnes and offences of my misse-led life but rather looke upon my Redeemer's death Is 53.5 who was wounded for my transgressions bruised for mine iniquites the chastisement of my peace was layed upon him by his stripes therfore let mee be healed In the midst of the streete of thy throne ô God Reu 22.2 of either side of the river of life there is a tree of life bearing twelve manner of fruits and the leaves of the tree are for the healing of the nations O my God let mee but come to tast of those fruits let mee but be shaded under the leaves of that tree of life Ps 41.4 Ps 103 1. Be mercifull unto mee heale my soule for I have sinned against thee Then shall my soule blesse thee O my Lord and all that is within mee shall praise thy holy name who forgivest all mine iniquities vers 3. and canst heale my diseases Into thine hands I commend my spirit Ps 31.5 for thou hast redeemed mee ô Lord thou God of trueth The Spirit and the bride say Come Reu 22.17 therfore let mee who now heare it say Come Let mee heare thy voyce ô God Gen 3.8 in the coole of the day not in the heate of thy displeasure And thou ô my Iesus who for such sinners wert made a sacrifice on the altar of the crosse how downe thine eare as thou didst upon the tree and heare and fullfill the desires of thy wounded supplicant Come ô Iesus and embrace mee in thine armes hide mee in thy wounded side from the wrath of thy father In thee alone doe I trust to thee alone doe I flee succour mee helpe mee save mee O Christ The world I leave to thee I come At the doore of thy mercy doe I knock I call I cry Lord protect mee Iesus comfort mee Strengthen my faith and confirme my hope As my earthly body draweth neerer to the earth so doe thou draw my soule up neerer unto thee who art the father of spirits Heb 12 9. O God make speede to save mee O Lord make hast to helpe mee Finish soone these dayes of sinne and then let mee enter into thy celestiall paradice and that for his sake in whom alone thou art well pleased even Iesus Christ my onely Mediatour and Redeemer Amen subject 16 THE SIXTEENTH SUBjECT Teares of a Mother for the sicknesse of her child The Soliloquie THE EjACULATION Psal 5. vers 1. Give eare to my words ô Lord consider my meditation vers 2. Hearken unto the voyce of my cry my king and my God for unto thee will I pray IT shall come to passe saith Moses to the house of Israel if thou wilt not hearken to the voyce of the Lord thy God Deut 28.15 to observe to doe all his commandements and his statutes which I command thee this day that all these curses shall come upon thee and overtake thee vers 16 Cursed shalt thou be in the citty and cursed shalt thou be in the field Cursed shall be thy basket and thy store vers 17 yea Cursed shall be the fruit of thy body c. vers 18 What all these curses from heaven for the sins of poore distressed mortalls O what a multitude of evills doe our sinnes deserve What punishment doeth not iniquitie cry for It cryeth for the curse of the citty the decay of trading the curse of the field whole rivers of blood in furious battailes the curse of the basket and the store the dearth of provisions Yet all these are but outward punishments and reflect onely upon the baser the worse part of our selves the body but Cursed shall be the fruit of the body oh this biteth like a Serpent stingeth like a Cockatrice Prov 23.32 The fruit of my body Is afflicted with sicknesse but is the sinne of the parent the cause of his affliction Yes yes my conscience acknowledgeth the guilt let my tongue be as ready to confesse it and my heart to repent of it But how standeth this with the justice of the Creatour Gen 18.25 Shall not the judg of all the earth doe right The Prophet Ezekiel telleth mee from God that The sonne shall not beare the iniquity of the father Eze 18 20. Mich 7 6. Ier 9.20 neither shall the father beare the iniquity of the sonne but the soule that sinneth it shall dye Else the daughter might rise up against her mother as saith the Prophet and the women by reason of the vengeance due for their sinnes might teach their daughters wayling c 31.29 Rom 3 4. if the sowre grapes which the parents have eaten should set their childrens teeth on edge But let God be true and every man a lyar that hee may be justified in his sayings and may over-come when hee is judged Hee it is who hath threatned to visit the iniquity of the fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth generation of them that hate him The sinne is mine Ex 20.5 but the punishment is mine infant's againe the sinne is mine infant's and the punishment is mine And yet farther The sinne is of and from both and the punishment is inflicted upon both His sufferance is my sorrow and his paines my distresse Lord what a due reward of sinne is punishment My child as yet it may be knoweth not sinne and yet is hee punished
1. King 14.18 Had not my husband beene King yet how should I forbeare the expence of a teare when death depriveth mee of the name of a wife Had hee not beene godly then the words of the Psalmist might peradventure have beene verified even of him Ps 27.15 His widow shall not weepe But ô hee was full of love and hee was truely religious for mine owne losse therfore must I freely weepe because my loving my religious husband is taken from mee Naomi requited the love of her daughters in law expressed to their dead husbands with a fervent prayer saying Ruth 1.8 The Lord deale kindly with you as yee have dealt with the dead and with mee vers 9. The Lord graunt that yee may find rest each of you in the house of her husband When the wife of Ezekiel was taken from him I doubt not but hee loved her so well that hee would have bemoaned her departure had not the Lord expressely charged him the contrarie Eze 24 16. But the Lord said unto him Sonne of man behold I take away from thee the desire of thine eyes with a stroake yet neither shalt thou mourne nor weepe neither shall thy teares runne downe Forbeare to cry vers 17 make noe mourning for the dead bind the tire of thine head upon thee and put on thy shooes upon thy feete and cover not thy lipps Surely his teares were not forbidden as if it were un-lawfull to lament the dead Noe it was onely because the Lord by that figne would shew that the calamitie of the Iewes should be beyond that sorrow which enforceth a weeping But what was Ezekiel's losse in comparison of mine Hee was a man and a Prophet set over his wife to be her instructer so was mine set over mee allso but there the scholler onely departed the wife here the very Oracle is ceased my husband is gone While hee was alive my knowledg was increased for if I would have learned any thing 1. Cor 14.15 1. Pet 3 7. I could aske him at home Hee dwelt with mee according to knowledg giving honour unto mee as to the weaker vessell and as being heires together of the grace of life Eph. 5.28 1. Tim. 5.8 so that our prayers were not hindered Hee loved mee even as his owne body hee provided both for mee and mine But now alas I may live in ignorance dis-respected and un provided for none will comfort mee none will helpe mee as did my husband that 's gone Act. 5.4 Though wicked Saphira had joyned with Ananias her husband in lying unto God concerning the sale of their possession vers 5. and her husband at the words of Saint Peter fell downe and gave up the ghost and was caried out by the young men vers 6. and buried yet shee lived not long enough either to bewayle his death or to consider of her losse Shee continued a widow but about three howers space vers 7. vers 10 and then fell downe at the Apostles feete and yeelded up the ghost Shee quickly followed her husband in death who joyned in the wickednesse with him in his life Shee hastened to the grave of her departed consort as if love had forbad her to survive her husband Yet it was not love but justice which made them lye together in the silent grave since they joyned together in a lye in their lives This alas was not a testimonie of her love so quickly to follow her husband to the land of darknesse Mee think's that I could be well contented to have dyed with my husband and to be layed in the grave by his frozen body but neither would I have sinne to be the cause nor judgment the effect Why then doe I so much lament his departure whose death was full of an assurance of life and whose hope was full of immortalitie Had Saphira survived her deceased husband but so long as to have beene sensible of the manner of his death it may be imagined that shee would have sighed her selfe to the grave and even griefe alone would have joyned them in the vault of darknesse and silence But God delayed not the punishment of her who obstinately persisted in the crime of her husband Here is yet some comfort for mee in my deepe calamitie that neither my husband was guilty of the sinne of Ananias nor yet did his death come so unexpected Why then should I grieve so much for the departure of him who is gone from hence to eternall rest Hee dyed in the Lord Reu 14 13. and I cannot therfore doubt but hee is assuredly blessed Hee resteth from his labours and his workes doe follow him Why then doe I shed such an aboundance of teares as if I either distrusted his happinesse or envyed his felicity My cause is not so greate if I rightly weigh it as to cause these floods to arise in mine eyes When I thinke upon him I have reason to rejoyce both because hee is freed as well from the tyrannie of sinne as from the miserie it produceth and allso because hee is at rest in my God If I consider my selfe allso mine affliction is not so greate nor my teares so just as I doe imagine for they will prove rather an argument of my distrust in God then of my love to my husband if I give them the freedome to flow beyond moderation Hee who lent mee him can send mee another yea such a one as may deserve as well and to whom my love may be as fervent If I have lost mine estate yet I have not lost my protectour unlesse I forsake him in my distrust If I complaine for want of the joy of societie even my very thoughts so they be religions will delight mee with their companie If I want an instructer my God will be my guide If I want a comforter my God will wipe these teares from mine eyes If I want either foode or sustenance for my body Prov 15.15 yet a good conscience will prove a continuall feast My losse is not so greate as ever was sustained if I compare it with those which others have soffered Naömie's affliction was greater then mine Ruth 1 3. when not onely her husband Elimelech but allso her two sonnes Mahlon and Chilion dyed and the woman was left of her two sonnes her husband at once 1. Sam. 4.11 It was worse by farre with the wife of Phinehar then it is with mee for her husband and his brother were both slaine in one day by the Amalekites yea and that in judgment too c 3.13 even because they made themselves vile and their father restrained them not When the newes came to her that the Arke of God was taken by the un-circumcised c 4.13 that ould Eli her father in law hearing the newes that the Arke was taken and that his sonnes were slaine vers 18 fell from the seate back-ward by the side of the gate and brake his neck and
downe Sharon was like a wildernesse and Bashan and Carmel did shake off their fruits But what was the reason of all these judgments of all this languishing sent upon the creatures I neede not goe farre to seeke the cause the Prophet will soone determine it for hee complaineth of the people that By swearing and lying Hos 4.2 and killing and stealing and committing adulterie they brake forth and blood touched blood These were their sinnes but what was the effect The selfe same Prophet immediately after threatneth them with it saying vers 3. Therfore shall the land mourne and every one that dwelleth therein shall languish with the beasts of the field and with the fowles of heaven Here was the earth and the world the citties and the fields and the vines and the plants and the lands and the corne and the oyle and the figtrees and all languishing grievously languishing and the cause thereof was the people's sinne But yet mee think's this cannot much concerne mee Shall I for a smootie eare of corne or two or for the drying of the branch of a vine or a figtree presently conclude that the withering of them can paralell my consumption Yes doubtlesse I must if I looke into the cause The trees and the other of the smaller plants could never either be guiltie of an offence or be sensible of a punishment but the men the men they were the offenders and for their transgressions their mother earth had her second curse I cannot pleade mine owne innocency or pretend that I am free from the guilt of enormities Noe noe I cannot I may therfore conceave my selfe one of the trees which I find so cursed for my branches mine armes my leggs my thighs doe pine away my fruits my workes and my labours are now decayed and what can I say or pleade for my selfe I am one of those trees which the Apostle speaketh of whose fruite withereth Iud. 12 without fruit twice dead and now am I ready to be plucked up by the rootes Yet for all this my stubborne heart mee think's stand 's out and would faine perswade mee that the curse of the trees resemble's not my disease But I hope that I shall came this heart of mine and put it to silence when I shall search more narrowly in to the sacred booke Wherfore did the Prophet say that hee heard from the Lord God of hosts a Consumption Is 28.22 determined even upon the whole earth VVas it not because the people sayd vers 15 They had made a covenant with death and with hell they were at agreement when the overflowing scourge should passe thorow it should not come nigh them for they had made lyes their refuge and under falsehood they had hid themselves Doeth not the Lord by the mouth of Moses threaten the people saying If yee will not hearken unto mee Lev 26 14. vers 16 and will not doe these commandements I will allso doe this unto you I will even appoint over you terrour Consumption and the burning ague that shall consume the eyes and cause sorrow of heart Doeth hee not againe menace them and say Deut 28. The Lord shall smite thee with a Consumption and a feaver and with an inflammation and with an extreame burning Doeth not the Prophet tell the people saying Is 10.22 vers 23. The Consumption decreed shall over-flow in righteousnesse for the Lord God of hosts shall make a Consumption even determined in the midst of all the land O my conscience my conscience thou art now at a standâ— O my heart my hardest heart thou art now struck dead Loe here 's my very disease my Consumption and is here not my sinne too Have I never made a covenant with death or beene at agreement with hell Have I never made lyes my refuge or hid my selfe under false-hood Have I not refused to hearken to my God and to doe his commandements O how faine would I have attributed my disease to fecond causes and rather have thanked the Physitian then the Divine for telling mee the ground But now I am at a stand and must needs confesse in the midst of my torments that I find in them the displeasure of my maker I cannot urge one act of goodnesse that ever I did to pleade my pardon for the least for the smallest sinne which I have committed Alas I find my destinie in the booke of Psalmes where the Prophet telleth mee that The wicked shall perish Ps 37.20 and the enemies of the Lord shall be as the fatt of lambs they shall Consume into smoake shall they Consume away O were I but worthy to be ranked in the forme with Aoraham I might as well as hee be styled The friend of God Iam 2.23 But my conscience telleth mee that though God be my friend in his goodnesse and longsuffering yet never was I hitherto a friend of his Such a friend to him indeede I am as hee was whom in his meekenesse hee called a friend Mat 22 12. hee who shifted in for a dinner among the guests that were invited But what became of him Alas when hee was found not having on a wedding garment vers 11 vers 13 the Lord then said unto his servants Bind him hand and foote and take him away and cast him into outward darknesse there shal be weeping and gnashing of teeth O this dreadfull sentence have I deserved besides this consumption which I now groane under and all because I am an enemie of the Lord's This shall be the plague saith the Prophet wherewith the Lord shall smite all the people that have fought against Ierusalem Zech 14.12 Their flesh shall consume away while they stand upon their feete and their eyes shall consume away in their holes and their tongue shall consume away in their mouth Ierusalem is the vision of peace Gal 4.26 But I have allways warred against it The Church upon earth hath found mee an adversarie and that Ierusalem which is above hath found mee an enemie This is my fault and justly therfore doe I feele this punishment For this offence my flesh consumeth away while I stand on my feete mine eyes are mistied and over-cast with dimnesse and my tongue is so feeble that I can skarce complaine I may now cry out as Hezekiah did and say Mine age is departed Is 38.12 and is removed from mee as a sheep-heard's tent I have cutt off like a weaver my life hee will cutt mee off with pining sicknesse from day even to night wilt thou make an end of mee But let mee not forget the sinne of Hezekiah His heart was lifted up 2. Châ—… 32.25 therfore there was wrath upon him and upon Iudah and upon Hierusalem Let mee not forget mine owne sinne My heart hath beene lifted up too I have beene proude yea I have swelled with scorne and contempt O that with Hezekiah too vers 26 I could humble my selfe for the pride of my
heart so that the wrath of the Lord might not come upon mee O that I could pray with Hezekiah weepe with Hezekiah that the Lord might say unto mee as hee did unto him Is 38.5 I have heard thy prayer I have seene thy teares That curse which David prophetically layed upon the wicked in his time Ps 58.7 mee think's doeth seeme at the first severe but yet it is just Let them melt away as waters which runne continually vers 8. as a snaile which melteth let every one of them passe away like the untimely sruit of a woman that they may not see the Sunne The snaile consumeth wheresoëver it crawleth and yet the providence of God is such that the consuming snaile is often found a remedie for the Consumption Thus what is good for my disease is troubled with the same and that which some have found to be a remedie is to mee a certaine remembrancer of my miserie ô that every thing might put mee in mind as well of the cause of this my disease Lord how my flesh doeth quiver though but litle is left of it How my heart doeth tremble as if noe comfort were left mee I have sinned I have done very wickedly But doeth the cure of my sicknesse as much exceede the power of my God as the skill of my Phisitian Noe noe hee may if hee please restore mee to health againe and hee may when hee pleaseth commit mee to the wormes All is in his hand ô what shall I doe to purchase his favour What shall I doe to have him reconciled Faine I would weepe for my sinnes but I know not how Faine I would shed some penitent teares but hardly will nature afford mee moisture enough But I resolve howsoever that noe excuse shall save a teare or a throb since without these I cannot hope for excuse and pardon Alas my sinnes lye heavie at the doore Gen 4.7 but I will rowle them away with the force of a water course I will grieve for my offending so mercifull a God I will lament for the offences which I have committed against him that visiteth mee I have but a litle time to continue upon earth unlesse it shall please him to restore mee to health Earth I am I must confesse it but I would not be drie I would not be dust untill I am layed to sleepe in the dust Io 9.6 Hee who made clay with his spitle to cure the blind can open mine eyes with the blessing of a teare Mee think's I am like unto the corne that is ground in a mill for so am I torne so am I crumbled worne into meale But since I am so I will make dough of this meale I will leaven it with my sorrowes I will adde unto it the water of my teares I will kneade it by contrition and bake it with the heate of that zeale which I will preserve in my heart and then will I pray that it may be a present accepted by my God Thus will I weepe in my languishing sicknesse thus will I lament for the cause of my sicknesse but I will weepe in faith and I will lament in hope that my Iesus will say unto mee as hee did to the woman that touched his garment Mat 9.22 Daughter be of good comfort thy faith hath made thee whole thy sinnes are forgiven thee part 3 The Third part of the Soliloquie setting forth the Patient's hope of recoverie THe hower of death seemeth neere approaching and putteth mee in remembrance of my last account The weakenesse of my body telleth mee now that the time is comeing wherein I must appeare at the greate tribunall Mee think 's these leane and languishing joynts doe seeme to wonder at mee for so long entertaining the fleeting ayre and doe groane under the burden of this sharpe disease Lord I cannot hope to continue here long since the litle house of my body is so tottering and shaking And yet mee thinks I have not sufficiently compleated the worke of my repentance and cannot therfore account my selfe ready to meete my God I repent indeede of whatsoever formerly I have done amisse and yet I cannot choose but doe amisse againe even as soone as I have repented I tremble when I thinke upon the punishment due to offenders and yet I tremble not when I commit when I act mine offences Readie I am not to dye too desirous I would not be to live and yet dye I must and yet live I may Lord if thou prolongest my life renew mine obedience I would be contented to live but then I would live without sinne I could yeeld to continue a while that I might perfect my repentance but then I am sure I should adde to the number of those sinnes whereof I repent I will resolve therfore neither to hasten my death nor yet too eagerly will I desire life I must needes confesse that I am willing enough to live Lord graunt that if I doe live I may live to thy glory and if I doe recover my health I may expresse my thanks in a religious life Thus I pray with my lipp but doe I pray so with my heart I am apt to promise unto God more then I feare I shall be able to performe and all these promises are made in hope that I may recover my strength Yea and it may please him who is the Physitian both of the soule and body to restore my body to health and strength I know that it is in his power hee may doe it if hee pleaseth Mat 19 26. With men indeede this seemeth impossible but with God all things are possible If I live I will spend my time in his service and upon these conditions I may hope to live Yea and so I will hope why should I not Hee in whom alone I doe hope hath power to graunt the thing that I hope for yea and to give a blessing thereto if hee full-filleth my hopes By him even dead bodies have beene restored to life it is not hard therfore for him to restore a living body to health When Tabitha was dead Act 9.37 vers 39 and washed and layd out Peter went into the upper chamber where all the widowes stood by him weeping and shewing the coates and garments which Dorcâ—s had made whilest yet shee was with them vers 40 Then the Apostle put them all forth and kneeled downe and prayed and turning him to the body hee sayd Tabitha arise and shee opened her eyes when shee saw Peter shee sate up Here was a wonder wrought by a man farre greater then the recoverie of my health would prove but this man receaved his power from God Mat. 9.8 Well might the people marveile when they saw such things and glorifie God who had given such power unto men But Saint Peter is dead and in these latter times those miracles are ceased of restoring the dead What then I am yet alive and my cure is not difficult to
Ier 3.22 And this is hee to whom Israel replyeth and saith vers 23 Behold wee come unto thee for thou art the Lord our God Truely in vaine is salvation hoped for from the hills and from the multitude of mountaines truely the Lord our God is the salvation of Israel This is hee who promiseth unto Zion c 30.17 saying I will restore health unto thee and I will heale thee of thy wounds saith the Lord because they called thee an out-cast saying This is Zion whom no man seeketh after This is the same Lord to whom the people of Israel addressed themselves Hos 6.1 when they said Come let us returne unto the Lord for hee hath torne and hee will heale us hee hath smitten and hee will bind us up Since then my God hath cured both lands and waters and bodies and soules Since hee woundeth and hee healeth none can deliver out of his hand Since hee bringeth downe to the grave and bringeth up Since hee woundeth and his hands make whole Since it is hee onely who forgiveth all our iniquities healeth all our diseases and saveth our lives from destruction Since it is hee that bindeth up the breach of his people and healeth the stroake of their wound Since it was hee that promised to penitent Iudah that hee would restore comforts to him and to his mourners Since it is hee alone who is the salvation of Israël Since it is hee that promised unto Zion to restore health unto her and to heale her of her wounds I will resolve therfore with the people of Israel to returne unto him for hee hath torne mee and hee alone can heale mee hee hath smitten mee and hee alone can bind mee up To him to him will I humbly sue for the cure of my wounded and distressed soule and to him will I willingly submitt my weake and feeble body I will powre out my soule unto him I will send up my supplications unto him and will pray and say The Prayer GReate Creatour full of compassion who both sendest sicknesse and restorest health be thou graciously pleased I most humbly beseech thee to turne thy wrath from thy distressed servant Thy hand ô Lord is heavie upon mee in this languishing consumption and the sting of my transgressions pierceth mee with sharpe and grievous torments Yet I must confesse ô my God that my sufferances doe not any wayes equall mine offences nor can the paines which I endure satisfie thee mine offended Lord for the least of my transgressions O my sinnes are upon mee Eze 33.10 and I pine away in the punishment for them how then shall I live My body languisheth my flesh consumeth Ps 22.15 Ps 39.11 Iob 33 19. vers 20 and now am I very neere drawne unto the dust of death Thou with thy rebukes doest correct mee for mine iniquities thou makest my beautie to consume away like a moath I am chastened with paine upon my bed and the multitude of my bones with strong paine so that my life abhorreth bread and my soule the daintie meate that is to be desired vers 21 My flesh is consumed away that it cannot be seene and my bones that were not seene vers 22 stick out My soule draweth neere unto the grave and my life to the destroyers But yet I know that with thee ô God is compassion Mat 9.12 and tender mercies The whole have noe neede of the Physitian but such as I who am sick and in miserie O that it might be sayd of mee as it was by Mary concerning her brother Lazarus Io 11.3 even that Shee whom thou lovest is sick O my God make mee thy friend in heart and soule and graunt that I may expresse it in my dutifull obedience to all thy commandements and then be thou my friend in thy succour and reliefe Ps 41.1 vers 2. Deliver mee now in this time of trouble preserve mee and If it may be thy good pleasure keepe mee alive make mee blessed upon the earth and deliver mee not over into the hands of death vers 3. Lord strengthen mee upon this my bed of languishing make thou turne thou all my bed in my sicknesse Thou hast chastened mee sore Ps 118.18 Ps 116.8 vers 9. Ps 143.6 ô give mee not over unto death but deliver my soule from death mine eyes from teares and my feete from falling that I may walke before thee in the land of the living Vnto thee ô my God doe I stretch forth my hands my soule thirsteth for thee as a thirstie land vers 7. Heare mee speedily ô Lord my spirit faileth hide not thy face from mee for I am become like unto them that goe downe into the pit Thou hast promised by thine Apostle Iam 5.15 that the prayer of faith shall save the sick and that thou wilt raise him up Lord I pray unto thee strengthen thou my faith I am sick Lord raise thou mee up and make good unto mee that thy promise by thy holy Apostle Heale mee ô Lord Ier 17.14 and I shall be healed save mee and I shall be saved for thou art my praise O Lord I call upon thee Ps 141.1 hast thee unto mee consider my voyce now I cry unto thee and restore mee to health But howsoever if thou hast otherwise determined of mee ô my Iesus cleanse thou mee by thy blood and cure my soule by the merits of thy passion My sinnes I must confesse are the cause of my sicknesse but doe thou ô God Ps 44.22 blott out as a thick clowde my transgressions as a clowde my sinnes returne unto mee for thou hast redeemed mee O give mee patience in this time of adversitie give mee comfort in the examples of thy mercy and give mee assurance of thy love in the sanctifying of this sicknesse unto mee As my body doeth dayly draw neerer to the earth so make my soule allso dayly draw neerer unto heaven If it may be thy pleasure to restore mee to health againe ô let it be thy mercy allso to renew mine obedience But if thou art resolved by this disease to free mee from the labours of this wearisome world and to bring mee downe to my grave for thy Christs sake o my mercifull and indulgent father bring thou my soule into thy celestiall paradise O graunt that my sinnes may consume farre faster then doeth my flesh and as thou takest away the strength of my body so be pleased to adde unto the strength of my faith I am thine ô Saviour and cost thee deere even the very blood that issued from thy crucified body be thou allso mine ô Iesus both now and for ever Abate the temptations â—… Satan and arme mee with strength to resist his suggestions Ravish my soule with the love of thy selfe that so I may with willingnesse forsake the vanities of this world with readinesse lay downe this tabernacle of flesh and with comfort that my soule may
learne to depend upon God Some things wee thinke wee can certainly foresee consulting with reason about those causes and effects which are meerely naturall but yet wee often faile in our expectations either through the defect of reason or the indisposition and weakenesse of the second causes or else yea and most chiefely by the order of the Most High Yet some are so fond as to magnifie their reason and thereupon ground a necessitie of events not well considering that Allthough this reason obligeth men yet it tyeth not him who is farre above both reason and nature Some againe in their curiositie prying too neerely into things to come borrow their assistance from the Prince of the ayer accounting their knowledg an excellency not tyed to the lawes of religion Thus did that wicked King Ahazia but contrarie to his expectation hee receaved an answer from a Prophet of the Lord vers 6. for Elijah said unto him Thus saith the Lord Therfore thou shalt not come downe from that bed on which thou art gone up but shalt surely dye O what a dreadfull sentence was this Especially to him who sought to the Devill that lyer for his knowledg but receaved such an answer from God who could not deceave Thus am I gone up to my bed too as was that bruised King I am tormented with sicknesse and I languish in a disease O what shall I doe Faine mee thinks I would be certified how long I have to live faine I would live Ps 39.4 and yet I am not certaine of life I am not readie for death and yet I am heartily afraid that I shall find this death too readie for mee But why should I not dye Am I not disturbed with heates and colds with weakenesse and feeblenesse Am I not in a world that giveth noe content That can neither bound my desires nor yet afford what I seeke While I am here I am subject to miseries every moment When I shall be gone this faintnesse and weakenesse these troubles and perturbations shall forsake my weake and infirme body But what then When my body shall sleepe in the silent grave shall it continue there for ever Or shall the soule have a decay and yeald to corruption together with my body of clay and earth Noe noe nothing lesse The body shall indeede lye downe in the dust but yet it shall one day be summoned to rise againe but the soule is eternall it shall continue for ever For ever it shall rest in continuall peace or for ever it shall be tormented in ever-lasting flames Noe merveile then ô my sorrowfull soule that thou art unwilling to leave this tabernacle of flesh since thou knowest not whither thou shalt flye at thy departure But why should not I as well hope for felicitie as dread those torments when my life shall end Doe I aske Why The reason is too plaine What good can I expect from the hands of him whom I have never loved whom I have never obeyed Those whom hee crowneth with heavenly blisse are they who sought for it in a miserable life But I have so lived upon earth as if earth should continue and I have made choyce of this world for the seate of my happinesse But now alas to my woe I find that earth can neither afford any true content nor yet a continuance of that which I accounted good What now shall I doe O whither shall I betake my selfe that I may be partaker of those joyes which are the inheritance of the godly Num. 23.10 Faine I would dye the death of the righteous and I wish that my last end might be like unto his But is this a desire easie to be graunted Alas had I lived the life of the righteous I might then have beene sure I should have dyed the death of them But that ô that is it which pricketh mee at the heart I have lived in sensualitie and this evill day hath beene out of my remembrance so that I cannot comfort my selfe with the smallest hope of what I so eagerly covet But what then Is there noe remedie at all but that I must have the bitter portion with the damned in hell God forbid Hee who hath forborne mee so long when I went on in my wickednesse may yet if hee please afford mee his mercy It is not above his power nor will it eclipse his glory It was once his free promise to a thiefe even dying upon the crosse Lu 23.43 2. Cor. 1.20 This day shalt thou be with mee in paradise His promises allso are sure they are in him yea and in him Amen I doubt not therfore but his mercy was as greate as his word was sure Thus hee saved one which forbiddeth mee despairing yet it was but one which forbiddeth mee presuming But surely it can be noe presumption to build upon his goodnesse Hee delighteth not in the death of a sinner What good can the condemning of mee doe either to him or his creatures True it is that his justice maybe magnified by it but yet it will adde noe glory to his mercy Againe there are but a few in heaven to sing forth his praises but infinite millions in hell and destruction dishonour him in their blasphemies In heaven mee think's there is one too few untill I shall come thither to adde to the number In hell mee think's there would be one too many if I should be throwne into that gulfe of perdition O my God since thou hast vouchsafed mee the knowledg of a heaven yea and of thee the Lord of heaven and earth allthough my knowledg be imperfect thou art offended yet for the merits of thy Sonne be pleased to make mee a cittizen of heaven Rev 21 27. It is most true that there shall in noe wise enter into that place any thing that defileth neither whatsoëver worketh abomination or maketh a lye but they onely which are written in the Lamb's booke of life Upon these termes my hopes indeede doe languish and grow more faint then my feeble body But who is that which condemneth the wicked Is it not hee who likewise calleth the wicked and inviteth them to mercy Is it not hee who telleth mee by his Prophet and saith it himselfe Eze 18 21. If the wicked will turne from all his sinnes that hee hath committed and keepe all my statutes Vers 22 doe that which is lawfull and right hee shall surely live hee shall not dye All his transgressions that hee hath committed they shall not be mentioned unto him vers 23 Have I any pleasure at all that the wicked should dye Saith the Lord God and not that hee should returne from his wayes and live O who is more wicked then I Who more sinfull then I My life hath beene nothing but a continued rebellion and my time hath beene wasted in nothing but disobedience Yet while I have life I have hope If I can but know mine iniquities and get a sorrowfull spirit for them