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B22568 The pope shut out of heaven gates, or, A dialogue between Pope Julius the 2d, his Genius, and Saint Peter wherein is most elegantly, learnedly, and wittily set forth how Pope Julius (after death) imperiously knocking at heaven gates, is absolutely denied entrance by Saint Peter, so that though having been alwayes stil'd His Holiness, and made famous by his warlike actions, whereby he hoped to become Lord of heaven, he is notwithstanding delivered over as a slave to Satan, and hurried away to the Devil's mansion / exactly from the original of the famous and learned Erasmus Roterodamus. Erasmus, Desiderius, d. 1536. 1673 (1673) Wing E3208B 31,750 50

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common way of coming to the Popedom which you have now set forth Jul. For some Ages past there hath been no other unless he that is to succeed me do possibly create a new one For I was no sooner got into the Chair but I streight published a formidable ●●ll forbidding all attempts of arriving at that Seat by those means which Bull a little before my death I renewed Of what force it proves others will see St. Pet. I believe none could better describe that mischief then your self but I wonder there should be any would accept the gift of it since it is obnoxious to such cares and with such difficulty to be strugled for I should rather think Pontifical power should scarce compel any to undertake the office of Presbyter or Deacon Jul. I wonder not at you for in your times the Reveuue and Reward of Bishops was nothing but labours watchings fastings preaching and oftentimes death Now 't is Empire and Tyranny and who for a Kingdom when there was hopes of it would not venture to die St. Pet. Well said But for Bononia was it departed from the Faith that it was to be restored to the Roman Church Jul. No no there was no such thing in it St. Pet. Perhaps the Bentivolii by their ill administration ruined the Commonwealth Jul. Rather that City flourished and increased under them with large and stately Buildings which made it the more greedily thirsted after St. Pet. I understand you they had then wrongfully invaded it Jul. Not so neither they possessed it by Covenant St. Pet. The Citizens then endured not him for their Prince Jul. Rather they doted on him and universally hated me St. Pet. What could then be the cause Jul. Because he so governed that out of the vast sums he gathered from the Citizens scarce a few thousands returned to our Treasury Besides it was convenient for advance of other matters I had then plotted therefore the French labouring in the business and others affrighted with my thunder-bolts Bentivolio driven out I placed Cardinals and Bishops over the City that the whole benefit might accrue to the Roman Church Besides whereas whilst in their Possession there was to be seen nothing but the Imperial Titles and Arms Now our Statues were every where to be seen our Titles read and our Trophies adored Everywhere now stands a Brass or Marble Julius Lastly had you beheld with what Royal Triump● I entred into Bononia you would perhaps have contemned all the triumphs of the Scipio's and Octavius and have thought it was not without cause I fought so sturdily for Bononia nay then would you have seen at the same time the Church Militant and Triumphant St. Pet. 'T was then in your dayes I perceive that happened which Christ has commanded us to pray Thy Kingdom come But the Venetians what had they done Jul. They began to follow the Gre k's example making only a laughing-stock of me and casting on me all reproaches imaginable St. Pet. Were they true or false Jul. What 's that to the purpose 'T is Sacriledge to whisper any thing of the Pope of Rome unless in his praise Then they disposed Benefices as they pleased no Centroversies were transferred to me no Dispensations traffick●d for what need I say more They afflicted the See of Rome with intolerable damage by usurping no small part of thy Patrimony St. Pet. My Patrimony Prithee what do'st talk of my Patrimony who forsaking all naked followed naked Christ. Jul. I mean certain Towns belonging to the See of Rome for so it pleased the Holy Fathers to call a peculiar part of their Possessions St. Pet. You consulted my infamy with your own gain but is it this you call intolerable damage Jul. What else St. Pet. But were their Manners corrupt or was Piety grown cold Jul. Pish thou talk'st of trifles I 'le tell you they cheated us of an infinite thousands of Duckets which would have maintained some legions of Souldiers St. Pet. A dreadful damage indeed to an Usurer But what was Ferrara's fault Jul. His He was the most ungrateful of all mankind Pope Alexander the Vicar of Christ had so much respect for him that he gave him his younger Daughter in marriage adding by way of Dower a rich and plentiful Jurisdiction to a false-hearted man who forgetful of so much humanity and kindness was continually barking against me for Simony and Buggery some Subsidies and Tolls likewise he laid claim to but that was not much but yet too much to be neglected by a careful Pastor Gen. Ay that was such a trader Jul. But to make short the story It was very necessary to the business I had in hand to joyn this Dominion to ours by reason of the conveniency of its scituation therefore I endeavoured by raising this disturbance to confer this Government on my Kinsman a stout Man and ready to dare any thing for the Churches sake as who lately with his own hand had for my sake slain Cardinal Papeias For as for my Daughters Husband he was content with his fortune St. Pet. What 's this I hear Have Popes Wives and Children Jul. Wives of their own indeed they have not but what a mighty wonder is it if they have Children since they are Men and not Eunuchs St. Pet. But that Schismatical Cabal what were they doing Jul. It would be too long to repeat that story from the beginning I 'le mak 't as short as I can The Court of Rome began to be scandalous to many they reported it every where defiled with Markets and Fairs of filthy lucre prodigious and abominable lusts witchcrafts sacriledges murders and simony me they declared a Simoniac drunkard swine covetous wretch and every way unworthy of that place which I held to the dammage of the whole Christian Religion therefore a generall Council was to be called to redress these grievances they alledged that I had sworn upon my taking on me this honour that within two years I would call a Council upon which condition only I was created Pope St. Pet. And was not that true Jul. Yes very true but as soon as I saw fitting I absolved my self of that Oath or if I had not who would have stuck at alittle perjury when a Crown was at stake In other things indeed Piety may be regarded as another Julius my second self elegantly said But see the impudence of these men and whither it arrived N●ne Cardinals revolt from me summon a Council invite and intreat me to Praeside it which when they could not obtain they declare Maximilian as Emperour Histories testifying that Councils of old used to be summoned by the Roman Emperours and Lewis the 12th of France Heads of it I tremble in the repeating it Thus they rend in pieces the seamless Coat of Christ which even his Crucifiers left whole St. Pet. But wert thou such a one as they represented thee Jul. What 's that to the purpose Paint me more wicked then the Cyclops more foolish
this day there is no Christian King whom I have not stined up to Arms breaking and trampling in pieces all League wherewith they had Allyed themselves together Next that League which at Cambray the Kings of France and Romans and other Princes entred into with me I utterly abolished so that not the least mention was made of it But above all this after having maintained so great an Army Adorned such magnificent Triumphs Exhibited such expensive Plays Built so many Places yet dying I left fifty hundred thousand Duckets and had done greater things if that Jew Physician who by his Art so long prorogued my life could have spun it out yet further And Oh! that now some Magician could restore me to life that I might see an end put to those glorious Actions I have begun yet dying I took diligent care that the Wars by me set afoot in the World should not be composed and made it my business even at my last gasp to have Money set a part only for that use Now to a Pope meriting so much from Christ and the Church do you delay to open the Gates of Christ But that which is most wonderful is That all these things were perpetrated by the sole virtue of my own mind and I had none of those little helps which others use to have Not from birth since I never knew my Father which I may say to my own glory Not from beauty for all men abhorred my Goblin-face Not from learning which I never attained to Not from strength of body being subject to those infirmities I before told you of Not from youth for I did these things in my age Not from the sailes of popular Applause for there were none but hated me Not from my clemency or granting favours to others for I was so inexorable that I even raged against those to whom others coneeded all things St. Pet. How can this be Gen. Though it seem hard you 'l find it somewhat easie Jul. But Fortune Age Sickness in short Gods and Men opposing only buoy'd up by my own Courage and Money in so few years I acted such great things and left so much matter to my Successors that they have Work cut out for ten years Thus much I have truly but modestly said of my self which if any of those which were wont to be about me at Rome should set off in their flourishing colours you would hear of a God and not a Man St. Pet. Invincible Warrior since all the Exploits you tell me are new or unusual let me plead an Excuse from my wonder or my ignorance and let it not be a trouble to you to answer to some particulars I would inquire into What are those neat pretty trim'd things with you Jul. These I brought up for my Soul's sake St. Pet. And what are those black and scarrified ones Jul. They are Souldiers and Captains who bravely died in Warfare for me and the Church some at the siege of Bononia more in the War against the Venetians and most at Ravenna to all which Heaven is due by Covenant for long ago I by large Bulls promised they should go directly to Heaven whoever lost their lives fighting for the cause and service of Julius St. Pet. I guess then these to be them who were often troublesome to me before your coming hither only they did not endeavour to force their entrance but shewed some leaden Bulls Jul. Then you did not admit them for ought I hear St. Pet. Admit them no sure nor any of those kind of People for so Christ taught me that these Gates were not to be opened to those who brought great Leaden Seals but those who had cloath'd the Naked fed the Hungry given drink to the Thirsty visited the Captive and lod●g the Stranger for if he would have those excluded who Prophesied in his Name and in his Name cast out Devils and did many wondrous works Canst thou think he would have those admitted who only bring a Bull hither in the name of Pope Julius Jul. Had I but known it St. Pet. I understand you if any of them had come from Hell and told it you you would have declared War against me Jul. Yes and have Excommunicated you too St. Pet. But to proceed Why are you arm'd your self Jul. As though you knew not that two Swords belonged to the Pope or would you go to War naked St. Pet. Indeed when I sat in that place I knew of no Sword unless it were the Sword of the Spirit which is the Word of God Jul. Malchus did not preach the same Doctrine whose eare possibly you cut off without a Sword St. Pet. I remember and confess it but then I fought for my Master Christ not for my self for the Life of my Lord not for money or secular power nor fought I then as high Priest the Keyes being only promised not given nor had I received the Holy Ghost and yet I was commanded to put up my Sword that he might publickly admonish this kind of fighting was not fit for Priests no not for Christians But again Why dost thou so gloriously boast hy self a Lygurian as if it were any thing pertinent to Christ's Vicar what People he was derived from Jul. Yes I esteem it an act of great Piety to ennoble my Nation and therefore have inscribed this title on my Money Statues Walls and Arches St. Pet. Then you know your Country though you did not know your Father At first I thought thou wouldst have talked of the Country of the Heavenly Jerusalem and of the Faithful and of its only Prince whom they desire to Sanctifie that is to praise his Name But why dost thou add Nephew by the Sister to Sixtus a man I wonder should never come hither especially having been Pope and Allyed to so great a Captain as thou art Therefore pray tell me what manner of man he was Was he a Priest Jul. Ay and a brave Souldier besides of a strict Religious Order to wit a Franciscan St. Pet. Indeed I knew among the Laicks a very good man called Francis a pious contemner of riches pleasures and ambition has that poor man now such Lordly followers Jul. You as far as I can perceive would have nothing improve or grow better He was poor and blessed and now his followers are so rich that even we envy them St. Pet. 'T is well But to return where we were Why Nephew to Sixtus Jul. I 'le assure you that 's done very advisedly to stop the mouths of those affirm me to be his Son and talk it a little too freely St. Pet. Freely and is it not as truly Jul. But that suits not with the honour of the Papacy to which alwayes respect should be had St. Pet. It would have the best respect and care of its own honour and dignity if it admitted nothing might fall under just reproach but let me conjure you by the Papal Majesty to tell me truly whether this be the solemn and