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ID Title Author Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication) STC Words Pages
A28082 A collection of apophthegms, new and old by Francis Bacon, Baron of Verulum, Viscount St. Alban. Bacon, Francis, 1561-1626. 1674 (1674) Wing B278; ESTC R25903 39,288 97

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unto ●nother man 84. Stilpo the Philosopher when the people flocked about him and that on● said to him the people come wonderin●● about you as if it were to see som● strang beast No ●aith he it is to see man which Diogene's sought with his La●●●orn at noon day 85. A man being very jealous of h●● Wife insomuch that which way soev●● she went he would be prying at her heel● and she being so grieved thereat in pla●● terms told him That if he did not for 〈◊〉 future leave off his proceedings in this n●●ture she would gra●t such a pair of hor●● upon his head that should hinder him fro● coming out at any door in the house 86. A Citizen of London passing t●● streets very hastily came at last whe● some stop was made by Carts and fo● Gentlemen talking together who kn●● him where being in some passion that●● could not suddenly pass one of them●●● this wise spake to him That others had 〈◊〉 by there was room enough only he co●●● not tell if their Horns were so wide as his●● 87. A Tinker passing Ch●●pside wi●● his usual tone Have you 〈◊〉 work for Tinker an Apprentice standing at dore opposite to a Pillory there set u● called the Tinker with an intent to 〈◊〉 a jest upon him and told him that should do very well if he would stop those two holes in the Pillory to which the Tinker answered That if he would put his head and ears a while in that Pillory he would bestow both brass and nail upon him to hold him in and give him his labour into the bargain 88. A young Maid having married an old Man was observed on the day of Marriage to be somewhat moody as if she had eaten a dish of Chums which one of her Bridemen observing bid her●● be cheery and told her moreover that an old horse would hold out as long and as well as a young one in travel to which she answered stroking down her belly with her hand But not in this Road Sir 89. There was in Oxford a cowardly fellow that was a very good Archer he was abused by another and moaned himself to Sir Walter R●leigh then a Scholar and askt his advice what he should do to repair the wrong had been offered him Raleigh answered Why challenge him at a match of shooting 90. Whitewood a grave Divine was much esteemed by Queen Elizabeth but not preferred because he was against the Government of Bishops he was of a blunt Stoical nature he came one day to Queen and the Queen happened to ●●ay to him I like thee the better Whitehead because thou livest unmarried He answered In troth Madam I like you th●● worse for the same cause 91. Doctor Lawd said that some Hypocrites and seeming mortifyed men 〈◊〉 held down their heads like bulrushes were like the little Images that they place in the very bowing of the Vaults o● Churches that look as if they held up the Church but are but Puppets 92. A Noble Man of this Nation famously known for his mad tricks on 〈◊〉 time having taken Physick which h● perceiving began well to work called up his man to go for a Surgeon presently and to bring his Instruments with him th● Surgeon comes in with all speed t●● whom my Lord Related that he foun● himself much adicted to Women and therefore it was his will that the cause of it might be taken away and therefore commanded him forthwith to prepare hi●● Instrument ready for to gueld him 〈◊〉 the Surgeon forthwith prepares accordingly and my Lord told him he would not see it done and therefore that h●● should do his work the back way 〈◊〉 both parties being contented my Lord makes ready and holds up his 〈◊〉 and when he perceives the Surgeon very neer him he lets flye full in his face which made the Surgeon step back but coming presently on again Hold hold saith my Lord I will better consider of it for I feell the retentive faculty very weak at the reproach of such sharp Instruments 93. The Lord Henry Howard being Lord Privy Seal was asked by the King openly at the Table where commonly he entertained the King upon the sudden My Lord have you not a desire to see Rome My Lord Privy Seal answered Yes indeed Sir The King said and why My Lord answered because and please your Majesty it was once the Seat of the greatest Monarchy and the Seminary of the bravest men in the world amogst the Heathen and then again because it was the See of many holy Bishops in the Primitive Church most of them Martyrs The King would not give it over but said and for nothing else My Lord answered Yes and it please your Majesty for two things especially the one to see him who they say hath such a power to forgive other mens sins confess ●is own sins upon ●is knees before a Chaplain or Priest and the other is to hear A●tichrist say his Cr●e● 94. There was a curst Page that h●● Master whipt naked and when he ha●● been whipt would not put on his cloath and when his Master bad him he said Take them you for they are the Hangma● Fees 95. There was a Lady of the We● Country that gave great entertainme●● at her house to most of the gallant Gentlemen thereabout and amongst other●● Sir Walter Raleigh was one This Lady though otherwise a stately Dame was notable and good House-wife and i● the morning betimes she called to one o● her Maids that lookt to the Swine an● asked are the Pigs served Sir Walt●●● Raleighs Chamber was fast by the Ladie● so as he heard her a little before dinne● the Lady came down in great state int● the great Chamber which was full o● Gentlemen and as soon as Sir Walter Ra●●leigh set eye upon her Madam saith he Are the Pigs served The Lady answered●● You know best whether you have had you● breakfast 96. The●e were Fishermen drawing● the River at Ch●lsey Mr. Bacon cam● thither by chance in the After-noon●● and offered to buy their D●augh they were willing He 〈◊〉 them what they would take They asked Thirty Shil●●ings Mr Bacon offered them Ten They refused it Why then saith Mr. Bae●●on I will be only a looker on They drew and catched nothing Saith Mr. Bacon are not you mad fellows now that might have had an Angel in your purse to have made merry withal and to have warmed you thorowly and now you must go home with nothing I but saith the Fishermen we had hope then to make a better gain of it Saith Mr. Bacon well my Master then I 'le tell you hope is a good Break-fast but it is a bad Supper 97. A Lady w●lking with Mr. Bacon in Grays-Inne Walks asked him whose that piece of ground lying next under the walls was He answered Theirs Then she asked him if those Fields beyond the Walks were theirs too He answered Yes Madam those are ours as you are ours to look on and no more
for Images answered yes For you read that thy people laid their sick in the streets that the shadow of Saint Peter might come upon them and that a shadow was an Image and the obscurest of all Images 155. Sir Edward Dyer a grave and wise Gentleman did much be●●eve in Kelly the Alchymist That he did indeed the work and did make Gold ins●much that he went into Germany where Kelly then was to inform himself fully thereof After his return he dined with my Lord of Canterbury where at that time was at the Table Dr. Prown the Physician They fell in talk of Kelly Sir Edward Dyer turning to the Archbishop said I do assure your Grace that that I shall tell you is Truth I am an eye-witness thereof And if I had not seen it I should not have believed it I saw Mr. Kelly put of the Base Mettal into the Chrysible and after it was set a little upon the fire and a very small quantity of the Medicine put in and stirred with a stick of wood It came forth in great proportion perfect Gold to the Touch to the Hammer a●● to the Test. My Lord Archbishop said you had need take heed what you say Sir Edward Dyer for here is an Insidel at the Board Sir Edward Dyer said again pleasantly I should have looked for an Infidel sooner in any place then at your Graces Table What say you Dr. Brown said the Archbishop Dr. Brown answered after his blunt and hudling manner The Gentleman hath spoken enough for me Why saith the Archbishop what hath he said Marry saith Dr. Brown he said He would not have believed it except he had seen it And no more will I. 156. Doctor Ionson said That in sickness there were three things that were material the Physician the Disease and the Patients And if any two of these joyned then they get the victory For Ne He●cules quidem contra duos If the Physician and the Patient joyn then down goes the Disease For then the Patient recover● if the Physician and the Disease joyn that is a strong Disease and Physician mistaking the cure then down goes the Patient if the Patient and the Disease joyn then down goes the Physician for he is discredited 157. Mr. Bettenham said That vertuous men were like some herbs and spices that give not out their sweet smell till they be broken or ●rushed 158. The Lord Archbishop Laud said T●at some Hypocrites and seeming mortified Men which held down their heads were like the little Images in the Vaults or Roofs of Churches which look and bow down as if they held up the Church when as they bear no weight at all 159. There was a Painter became a Physician whereupon one said to him You have done well for before the faults of your work were seen but now they are unseen 160. There was a Gentleman that came to the Tilt all in Orenge Taw●ey and ran very ill The next day he came again all in Green and ran worse There was one of the Lookers on asked another What is the reason that this Gentleman changeth his Colours The other answered sure because it may be reported That the Gentleman in the Green ran worst than the Gentleman in the Orenge-Tawney 161. Mr. Whitehead a grave Divine was much esteemed by Queen Elizabeth but not preferred because he was against the Government of Bishops He came one day of the Queen and the Queen chanced to say to him I like thee the better Whitehead because th●● livest Vnmarried He answered again In troth Madam I like you the worse for the same cause 162. Zelim was the first of the Ottomans that did shave his Beard whereas his Predecessors wore it long One of he Bashaws askt him why he altered the Custom of his Predecessors he answered Because you Bashaws may not lead me by the bread as you did them 163. Aeneas Sylvius that was Pope Pius secundus was wont to say That the former Popes did wisely to set the Lawyers awork to debate Whether the Donation of Constantine the great to Sylvester of St. Peters Patrimony were good or valid in Law or no The better to skip over the Matter in Fact whether there was ever any such thing at all or no 164. The Lord Bishop Andrews was asked at his first coming over of the Archbishop of Spal●●o whether he were a Protestant or no he answered Truly I know not But I think he is a Detestant That was of most of the Opinions of Rome 165. It was said amongst some of the grave Prelates of the Counsel of Trent in which the School-Divines bare the sway That the School men were like the Astronomers who to save the Phaenomena framed to their conceit Eccentricks and Epicycles and a wonderful Engine of Orbes Though no such things were so they to save the practise of the Church had devised a great number of strange positions 166. Aeneas Sylvious would say That the Christian Faith and Law though it had not been confirmed by Miracles yet was worthy to be received for the Honestly thereof 167. Mr. Bacon would say that it was in his Business as it is frequently in ways That the next way is commonly the foulest And that if a man will go the fairest way he must go somewhat about 168. Mr. Bettenham Reader of Grays-Inne used to say That Riches were like muck when it lay upon an heap it gave but a stench and it Odour but when it was spread upon the ground then it was cause of much Fruit. I69 Cicero married his Daughter to Dolabella that held Casars pa●ty Pompey had married Iulia that was Caesars Daughter After when Caesar and Pompey tock Arms one against the other And Pompey had passed the Seas and Casar possessed Italy Cicero staid s●mewhat long in Italy but at last sayled over to joyn with Pompey Who when he came to him Pompey said you are welcome but where left you your Son-in-Law Cicero answered with your Father-in-Law 170. Vespasi●● and Titus his eldest Son were both absent from Rome when the Empire was cast upon Vespasian Domitian his younger Son was at Rome who took upon him the Affairs and being of a Turbulent spirit made many changes and displaced divers Officers and Governours of Provinces sending them Successors So when Vespasian returned to Rome And Domitian came into his presence Vespasian said to him Son I looked when you would have sent me a Successor 171. Nero loved a beautiful Youth whom he used vitiously and called him Wife There was a Senator of Rome that said secretly to his Friend It was pity Nero's Father had not such a Wife 172. Galba succeeded Nero and his Age being despised there was much License and Confusion in Rome during his Empire whereupon a Senator said in full Senate It were better to live where nothing is Lawful than where all things are Lawful 173. Augustus Casar did write to Livia who was over-sensible of some ill words that had been spoken of them