to have in our former dwelling for there it was very meane having but a slender stock of money left after our too extravagant expence This miserable life I believe was a principall cause of a great indisposition besieg'd Perretta for Melancholly and discontent to see her self fallen from a plentifull condition to calamity gaining the ascendance over her Spirit the good woman felt her self drawing neerer dissolution and therefore as most People use in like extremity she would impart some documents before her death Considering me as her daughter I received from her dying mouth very apparent testimonies of a Cordiall affection of all her secrets and Maximes she profess'd she concealed not any from my knowledge and besides gave me divers wholesome Counsells which I have since made good use of In summe no scruple nor superstition harbour'd in her heart She lived so roundly that I imagine if what is reported of the other World be true the rest of humane Soules now play at Bowles with her's She knew no more what belonged to remorse or Cases of conscience than those of Topinambou for she said if she ever had heard any discourse thereof in her youth she had lived long enough to forget it as a thing that serv'd for nothing but to disturb the Mind's repose She had often told me before the riches of this World are so common that they ought not to appertaine more peculiarly to one than another and that it argued ingenuity and wisdome in any one to take a share though out of others hands if fortune favour'd the designe with a convenient opportunity For said she I came naked into this World and naked I will return If I have got any of others goods I shall not carry them with me let them goe seek where they are and take them it nere shall trouble me What! If I should be punisht after my death for committing that which they call Fellony or Theft might not I with reason answer my accusers that 't were injustice to bring me into the World to live and not permit me to take those things requisite to maintaine a Life After severall such discourses her soule took leave of her Carcase which I buryed without any Pompe as she injoyned me for she know there was nothing more unnecessary Soone after her decease I procur'd some new acquaintance that furnish'd me with a little Belly-timber But the losse of my good Mother was so sensible besides the ill hap I had to incounter now and then some persons too well acquainted with my former carriages that I resolv'd to leave Paris and to remove my station to the City of Roan My Beauty was yet powerfull enough to attract me many Visitants but making no respect or distinction of Persons in effect being a stable for all Horses among others I met with a running Nagg by whose virulency I was so paid that in short time I found my body infected with a foul disease Cursed be those brought it into France it disturbs the pleasures of well disposed people and it is favourable to none but Chirurgions who indeed owe Candles to one of our Kings for leading his Souldiers to Naples to get it there and bring the seeds of it hither The onely happinesse in my misfortune was that an honest and gratefull Chirurgion to whom I had done some courtesie before physick'd me for much lesse than any other of his profession would have taken I will not entertain you any longer with these Ordures though I know you are none of those squeamish people to whom a foul relation savours as ill as the thing it self Let it suffice to tell you I took a voyage as they say in Bavaria to see the Emperour inthron'd and at my return I found my face so changed I was inforced to make my recourse to Art Painting Waters and Perfumes were the daily remedies I used to repaire the ruines my Body and Face sustained Besides I began to consult my Looking-glasse for new attractions practised a certain affected manner of speech that infinitely inchanted those I had a desire to intrap At last a man very rich and without office became so vanquished by my charms that he took me into his own house to injoy me there with more liberty I grant he might have found a handsomer Mistress than I and so he confessed himself but there was something in my humour sympathised so with his disposition that he preferred me before all others of my sex The cause of our Separation proceeded from a little brangling betwixt us because I made more havock of his goods and spent his money more lavishly than he was willing to permit The practice of my first profession being yet fresh in my memory that was my present refuge I applyed my selfe eagerly to it a long time refusing no body that brought what would help to make the Pot boyle While I was in the height of my trading a certain Meacock that was soon after to be married desirous to know before-hand in what parts to attaque his enemies in Cupids combats where he never yet had shewn his valour was addressed to me by a Kinsman of his to receive instructions Having been at my Lodging one Sunday after dinner and informed I was gone to the Sermon thither came he to finde me out At his arrivall the Preacher falling upon the relation of the first part of Mary Magdalen's life inveighed bitterly against Courtezans and represented so lively the pains prepared for them in the other World that my Lover said to himself he might well enough go back again or seek another Mistress to do him that courtesie imagining I should be touch'd with too much remorse by the end of the Sermon to continue that life any longer But at the Sermons end he finding opportunity to accost me after he had discover'd me his thought of my conversion I return'd him this answer which perchance in your judgements will savour of much impiety However it is no matter I come not hither to make you believe I repent of my past iniquities Insooth Friend my soule must be very weakly principled to be startled at the stories this prating Monk has told us Don't I know well enough every one must follow his owne trade He makes it his profession to amuse the simple people with his Prattle disswading them from haunting debosh'd and lewd companies where they idly consume their time persons and purses or become ingaged in some desperate and unnecessary quarrell And I exercise my part to quench the Concupiscense of men by Charity Thus was my Novice paid and being a good silly soule according to the stamp of that old ignorant Age when people wip'd their Noses on their sleeves he wonder'd at my libertine humour which he took to be very wicked and inconsistent with his goodly Religion To make my story short we went together from Church to my Chamber where I read him a Love-Lecture and taught him what he desired to learn but
with him in a Chamber between that of the pretended Marquisses and the Chamber of her Father The amorous Warr was so pleasing to them that they began it as soon as possibly they could They made the Bed to shake in such a manner that her Father in the next room did easily perceive it and all the Night afterwards he did not put his eye lids together so much of unquietnesse did perplex his Spirit He could not but think of that which his Wife had said unto him and sometimes he so suffered himself to be carried away by distrust that he took Francion to be some grand pillager who had enterprised to rob him of whatsoever he had in his house in this violence of suspition he said unto himself As soon as day appears I will not fail to send to the Provost Marshal and all the Marshals men to apprehend this Companion He shall be taken in a snare But good God doe 〈◊〉 think to be more cunning than himself who is the Master of all inventions He peradventure hath done his work already and is fled away Ah miserable man that I am to be so desperatly ruined that I know not which way in the world to redresse my self As he was in these perplexities his Daughter and her Sweet-heart coming to re-imbrace each other did shake the bed again with so much violence that he heard it plainly He knew not that it was his own Daughter who lay there for he gave expresse Order that the Groom of Francions Chamber who served him as a Gentleman should be lodged in it And because there was a Coffer in that room in which were his richest habiliments he conceived that the noise which he heard did proceed from his guests who were breaking open the Coffer to empty it He listned again attentively and hearing no noise at all I know not what new revolution of thoughts did surprise his Fancy and he began to accuse himself of too much suspition and to believe that he had heard nothing at all but in imagination only and said within himself that he was a vain man to take a person so qualified for a thief Neverthelesse he could not take the least rest and going softly out of his chamber he did see if all his Gates were fast locked and if every one were asleep in their lodgings Being come down into the Court he was invaded by a thousand fears It seemed to him that he saw men coming down the window on a Ladder and ever and anon he would look behind him to see if any one was there ready with a prepared knife to cut his throat Perceiving at the last the error of his judgement and that it was overcome by vain Illusions he returned to his Chamber where he was no sooner entred but he heard the same noise as before He knew then that he was not deceived but did draw more near unto the wall and most attentively listned to that which they were doing in the other Chamber The young Lover who was not able to conceal his own joys did say at that instant unto his Sweet-heart I see now that there is not any thing which per severance is not able to bring to effect I have found the artifice to open that which was most close locked all must give way unto it Now as Men filled with presumption when they hear any doubtfull words reported they turn them all unto their own glory and as those who believe they are hated by every one do turn all to their own prejudice so the fancier of all men doe accommodate themselves to their own passions and ordinarily doe cause those things to appear unto them which they doe either fear or hope This most particularly doth appear by covetous persons who never see two men speaking together but they believe they discourse of the means how to pillage them of their goods This old Buisson the grand Horesleech of the world was of the same humour and hearing these words from the Lover of his Daughter he did give an interpretation to them according to his own suspition He immediatly believed that some one endeavoured to open his chests and the strong suggestion did grow upon his Soul when the young Gentleman did thus pursue his discourse I hereafter shall have no more cause to aâ—…ict my self for I am possessor of the choicest treasure that is here But we doe not consider that the Day by degrees is coming on I am afraid I shall be discovered if I goe not immediatly away but as I goe out of the window can I cleave like Ivy to the Wall I know not but I will make a tryal what I can do Upon my credit thou speakest the truth said old Buisson Thou art possessor indeed of the choicest treasure in my house since thou hast taken that which I had locked up in my Coffer but thou shalt not carry it away as thou thinkest I shall obstruct the passage Assuming then unto himself a generous resolution he took his Sword and came to the door of the Chamber which he thought to have broke open with his Feet Francion who that night slept soundly and heard not the shaking of the bed at all did awake at this new noise and did arise to see what the businesse was and knowing old Buisson by his Tongue he demanded of him for what cause he did grow into so great a choler What cause said he Have I not good reason There is in the next room one of your Servants who hath broken open one of my Coffers Francion replyed I cannot believe it I entertain no Servants but such as I conceive to be very faithfull Neverthelesse let me see if that be true which you represent if it shall appear so unto me I will afflict upon him the severest punishment my self As he was speaking these words Buisson called one of his Grooms who brought him a Candle and his Daughter having in the mean time caused her Lover to hide himself under her Bed did put on her Petticoat and came to open the door rubbing her eyes as if she were but newly awake Her Father was much amazed to see her and demanded of her if she heard no noise in 〈◊〉 Chamber She made answer No forsooth neverthelesse he searched up and down and came at last to look under the Bed where he perceived her Companion whom he knew to be one of his Neighbours He thought that some one had been there to steal rather the treasure of his Coffer than the treasure of his Daughters Honour conceiving that necessity and not love had brought him thither The young Gentleman said unto him Sir I beseech you to pardon the fault which Love hath caused me to commit you know I am not descended of so base a Family that it will be any dishonour to you to have me to be your Son-in-Law Madamoiselle your Daughter doth not disdain me make me then so happy that I may have your consent as well as hers Monsieur
pay She accused me also of negligence that I had not looked out some place for my self as promised her at my departure I was constrained therefore to wear an old gray Sute which I had a Cloak of colour de roy which had a long time lain by me I was so ill accommodated that there was none of any judgement but would have taken me for the Son of the brave Captain of the Port. Neverthelesse I did goe abroad more often than before such a desire had I at that time to understand how all things were governed in the City which was a thought that never troubled me when I was in the College On the day before St. Martins I did repair to the Palace where I was never but thrice before to buy Gloves Being upon the stairs I saw a young man of my age coming down of whom I had some knowledge when I was in the College he was in a red Gown I remembred that he had a good voice and I believed that he was one of the Choristers of the Chapel and he passing by I had no more thought of him in that Relation Howsoever if the throng of the people had not removed me from him I would have saluted him with the Nickname that was given him in the College and brought those ralleries unto his mind with which he was ordinarily upraided concerning his Father who was one of the basest Usurers Extortioners in the world Some dayes afterwards I had again the curiosity to return to that abominable place and walking along the Gallery of the Mercers I did see again this Sot in a gown faced with Velvet a Sattin Cassock he was speaking to a handsome young Girl that did sell perfumes and making as though he whispered in her ear he did kisse her cheek and plaid with her Brests I was resolved then to understand what was the worth of my Companion but seeing how he was imployed I did at that time excuse him and passing forward I resolved to come more early the next day And finding him not in that place I walked from one side to another and resolved to wander up and down in the severall turnings where immediately I happened on some Chambers very obscure and ill built where I saw an infinite number of Scribes some whereof searched the Rolls others were writing and from time to time did tell great sums of money which did infinitely possesse me I was amazed to observe with what speed they counted it at the last I beheld my young Gallant to come out of the next Chamber in the same equipage in which he was the day before He was followed by a disconsolate Damoisel who held a Paper in her hand and by an old Man of a good Countenance in a long Robe who did speak unto him bare-headed and with great Respect although the Damoisel did not so much as turn her head aside to look upon him but did sing to her self some part of a melancholly Ditty which began thus Alas who shall hasten the time where I attend But because he did go with great hast and I could not follow him I advised with my self to call him by that Name which the Scholars gave him conceiving that I who had such familiarity with him might speak more freely to him than those who followed him You you Tocaret said I whither do you run with so much hast wherupon one of the tellers of the money taking notice to whom I spake did come out of his place and striking me with his fist Impudent said he I will make you quiet enough if I knew Diminutive Clerk to what Proctor you do belong I would cause you to be soundly punished If there were not many about him who seemed to be all of them against me I had undoubtedly revenged my self but all that I could then doe was to answer his words and to tell him in my passion that I was no Proctors Clerk but a Gentleman This made that wretched fellow to laugh with an open mouth and say unto those who were about him Observe but what a countenance of a Gentleman he bath with his elbows out and his Cloak that laughs at us and all the world in shewing its teeth How you infamous Wretch said I Do you reckon of Nobility but only by the habit I had said more unto him but that an honest young Man who carried a good quantity of Velvet under his arm taking me by the hand did conduct me through the next Gallery and said unto me Have a care what you speak you ought to respect the place where you are and the persons to whom you speak He is one of the Registers whom you have abused What is a Register said I one who like a Griffon is alwaies scraping together with his Talons he with his Talons scrapes every day Silver enough which is laid forth upon the Table for him He made answer to me you are too scandalous You have also I know not by what Name miscalled one of the Counsellors within What that young Man said I who passed by I would fain have spoken with him for the last time that I was in the College where I received my education with him be did steal from me my pens my penknife and my Note Book I have certain proof of it and I have a desire to reprove him for it He who did speak to me and was a Sollicitor did advertise me to have a care of my self in regard of the quality of the person I made answer to him What do you say he is a Counsellor Undoubtedly he hath more folly in his head than Counsel The Sollicitor replyed the Court would not have conferred that dignity on him if it did not find him capable to receive it I made answer So it is most commonly observed that he who is advanced to the greatest honours in the Vniversity is commonly the greatest Asse and every new office that he hath doth serve but so much the more to declare his imperfections Be not so vain said the Sollicitor I am not vain at all said I for by my birth I am one of the most noble in France and he is but the Son of a base Merchant His Place and Office doe ennoble him said the Sollicitor And how did he come by that place said I. By his good Purse said the Sollicitor I made answer And even the basest Abject in the world may have such a quality and cause himself to be as much respected as long as he hath mony to command O good God! said I what a shame is this Where shall Virtue be now acknowledged Having spoke those words I did forsake the Sollicitor and did go into a great Hall full of a world of people who trotted up and down on this side and on that like pease boyling in a pot For my self if I had been carried into such a place when I was asleep I should verily believe when I waked That I was in
Tub rejoyced within her self at his disaster and soon after drew in the ladder believing her companions would not come that night The Thief that stayed below seeing Oliver who had got into the Castle look't no more after him and that his other Camarade was so hung in the Aire that there was no possibility of relieving him expected no good issue of their Plot concluding if his fellow were found hanging next morning in that posture he should gaine nothing by staying with him but the ill fortune to be condemned to beare him company on another Gallowes However a certaine blinde and groundless curiosity inviting him to walk round the Ditch he advances to Francion's Tub and feeling a Man in it he dragg'd him by the Armes out of the Water Then his Necessity with the naturall inclination he had to pilfering reviving his desire of prey made him presently dive into the strangers pockets where he found a Purse full of Carducu's and other money with a Ring that had so rich a lustre that maugre the Nights obscurity you might perceive its beauty This happy incounter somewhat qualified his former discontents and without taking farther care whether the Man he robb'd were alive or dead or inquiring what accident had brought him thither he presently left that place resolving to wander as his Starres should direct him Oliver who had a jewell in possession of far greater value than his fellow-Thief resolved to injoy it to the full and drowne his desires in delight having first shut the Chamber windows close lest the injurious Light finding an entrance there should too soon betray him Lauretta with an affected wantonnesse had carelesly throwne her selfe againe upon her Bed expecting her Champion who began his skirmish with so hot a charge of kisses as left no space for Words After this first Assault she whom the excesse of Pleasure had before struck dumb soon recovered the use of speech and putting her Armes about his Neck and her moist Lips to his Cheeks Eyes and Mouth broke silence with these acclamations Oh! deare Francion how much sweeter is thy Conversation than that old doting fellow's whom I have been forc't to marry O how winning are thy Charmes how great thy merit How happy doe I'esteeme my selfe for having the wit to discerne and be taken with thy perfections I shall never desire to be loosed from that pretious Chaine Thou dost not speake my deare continued she with a kisse more ardent than the former Is it because my company seems not so agreeable to thee as thine to me Alas if it were so I should indure penalty enough by my imperfections Then after a short silence she added O! really I must accuse my selfe of folly for putting out my Candle for what need I have fear'd the old fellow 's gone forth I thinke to practise the remedies thou taughtst him for his incurable diseases I must call to Katherine for a light I am not altogether of the opinion of those who hold the mysteries of Love are to be perform'd i' th darke I 'm certaine the sight of the beloved object contributes new fuel to lovers fires besides to be plaine with thee my deare heart I would gladly see the Emerald thou promisedst to bring me I believe thou hast so much care to comply with thy owne ingagement and my fancy that thou hast not forgot it hast thou tell me really Nothing could excuse Oliver from discovering himselfe being conjured so oft to speak as if he had been Francion But imagining Lauretta would be exceedingly displeased when she found her selfe deceived he determined to use all possible meanes to pacifie her So he arose and having a reasonable good wit he prostrated himselfe upon his knees before her with these words Madam I am infinite sorry you are deceiv'd taking me for another Truly had not your Caresses set an edge upon my appetite I should not so easily have fallen into the crime I have committed How ever inflict upon me what punishment you please I am ready to receive your doome knowing my life and death are both at your disposall This voice differing much from Francions made Lauretta presently perceive her errour Then Shame and Anger took such possession of her Minde that had she not considered what was done could not againe be undone she had probably been transported to some extream distemper But the most pleasing remedy she could apply to that sore was to consider that he whom shee took for Francion had given her a taste of such delicates as she could not repent the pleasure of enjoying them nor Francion himselfe perchance have furnisht better However she feigned her self much displeased asking Oliver with an angry tone who he was And seeing he answered her not immediately Wicked Wretch said she art not thou one of Francions Servants hast thou not murther'd thy Master to come hither in his place Madam reply'd Oliver remaining still upon his knees I 'le assure you I know not that Francion you speake of To give you an account who I am I shall doe is freely so you promise to believe what I shall tell you and let me suffer if I speak any thing but truth Goe on said Lauretta I doe promise it but be briefe in your relation You have a Maid continued he called Katherine who hath partly been the cause of this adventure and if your patience will permit I shall acquaint you how You are deceived in believing her a Maid Shee 's of the contrary sexe onely disguised in Womans Cloaths on purpose to give Thieves entrance here to rob you and this night she promised to cast a Cord-ladder out of a Window to facilitate their ascent The disorders of my youth invited me to leave my Fathers house and ranke my self in company with these thieves but I have framed a resolution a few dayes since to relinquish their abhominable Course of life Neverthelesse meeting with the ladder you had prepared for Francion and taking it to be Katharine 's I was forced to come up first yet Heaven in my witnesse I had no intent to assist them in the Robberie but rather to discover their plot to any I should chance to meet and so prevent the mischiefe To confirme your beliefe Madam be pleased onely to cast your eye from the Window downwards and you shall see one of the thieves hanging upon the Cord which I have halfe drawne up This is a cleare testimony that had I complyed with their villanious intentions I should not have used him in that manner Lauretta moved with admiration at these words went presently to satisfie her naturall curiosity and peeping through a little Window she perceived what Oliver had told her was no lye so she demanded no further proof of his innocence but longing to know how Katherine was imployed she called her to bring a light having first hid Oliver betwixt the Bed and Wall Katherine by the helpe of the Candle she brought lighted having a full view of Lauretta's naked
and Person not unhandsome was nothing unwilling to let him recommence the Game wherein at their first encounter he had so well played his part And he who was no novice in the art of Love reading the intentions of her yeilding heart in the wanton motion of her craving eyes neglected not the favourable opportunity was given him to please his appetite with a second taste of so delicious a Banquet The recreations of their bodies past they began to give some liberty to their tongues Oliver's chief discourse was of the happinesse Fortune had unexpectedly throwne upon him assuring Lauretta with the repetition of a multitude of Oathes that he esteemed nothing the whole Universe conteined comparable to the contentment he received in her company You have good reason to return thanks to th' Heavens for one thing said Lauretta And that is for being so propitious to your intents that when I saw you at the middle of the Ladder coming up taking you for a servant of mine I retired and set my selfe in a Chaire expecting till you were got through the Window for had I stayed there I should soon have perceived you were not the man I look't for and not to conceale the truth you had infallibly found a very bad reception whereas now your entertainment has been such as I believe you have little cause to complaine I doubt not answered Oliver but you would have ill-treated me and I cannot blame you if you had for what inclinations could you have for a man unknowne surprising you in that manner instead of one whose company you had frequented and affected But I shall beg your belief of this Protestation If I am not equall in parts of Body or Mind to him whom you intended this night to honour with your embraces I may compare with him if not exceed him in affection and desires to serve you These demonstrations of a fervent Love open'd the way to divers other discourses which now and then were interrupted with some amorous Dalliances the delights whereof they repeated as oft as the Spirit moved When Lauretta saw the over-early Sun dart in his prying rayes through the Crannies of her chamber Window suspecting by that time her husband was ready to returne she advised Oliver to hide himself among the Hay in the stable and when the Draw-bridge was let downe take his opportunity to slip away After divers sweet Adieu's and an infinity of assurances to register her favours in his memory he consented to follow her directions and made his Nest in the Mowe while she returning to her Chamber lock'd her self within expecting the successe of Katherine and her confederate's Adventure This being Sunday Morning Three lusty Countrey ladds had got up betimes to goe to the first Mass and afterwards to a Village not farre thence to challenge at long Tennis the best gamesters of the place But finding the Church doores shut and the Curate not yet stirring they tooke occasion to walk about the Castle where they presently perceived the Thief holding the Cord-ladder with one hand and the Iron grate with the other the next object they discovered was Katherine stark naked from the waste downwards and taking her for an Hermaphrodite they burst out into such loud laughters and shouting as made the whole Village ring with their rude noise This waked the Curates curiosity to descend buttoning his Doublet as he went and see what Novelty caus'd that wondrous merryment But their emotion was so extravagant that they could hardly keep themselves upon their feet and did nothing but clap their hands wrest their bodies into a hundred antick postures and joult one another as if they had been little lesse than mad The good Pastour casting his eyes onely upon them perceived no cause of such excessive laughter and though he never ceased asking what the matter was for a good while could draw no other answer from them but a redoubling of their cries and laughter At length taking one by the arm Come hither Peter said he prethee tell me what may be the reason of this transportment All these words the fellow holding his sides with both his hands and laughter often interrupting his speech bad him look at one of the Castle windowes The Curate directing his sight that way quickly discerned what had put them in that absurd humour and with a moderate smile that no way discomposed his gravity You are a company of right Lobcocks said he to make such a monstrous clamour for so slight a matter It is a sign you have seen but little since the meanest Object in the world incites you to such boundlesse laughter and deportments befitting none but Bedlamites I must confesse I laugh too but 't is at your folly What know you but that you scoffe so at may rather require your compassion We shall hear anon by Mr. Valentine what the meaning of this May-game is perchance there has been some tragedie acted within his house this Night As the Curate had ended his speech he was accosted by a great number of his townes-men who wondring at this strange spectacle fell to examining the Thief and Katherine who had put them in that posture but they not so ready nor willing to render them an account were much perplexed within themselves they had so many witnesses of their shame At length upon further instance the Thief promised if they would procure his releasment he would tell them every particular But the Curate charged them that accompanied him not to help him off his tenters till the Castle gates were opened and he had spoke with Valentine so some of the rout rounding the Castle to see if they could spie any body at the windowes a mournfull voice piercing their Eares invited their Eyes to the bottom of the Ditch where at first sight they discerned a tub and more curiously surveying the circumjacent place they saw Francion who after recovering of his swoun felt himselfe so cold and feeble that his leggs not retaining strength enough to support his bruised body he had laid himselfe down by it to repose The Clowns seeing him in a sad condition some of them ran down to him and one of them helping him up and wiping the blood a little off his face much amazed cryed out Mercy Heavens this is my Lodger the devout Pilgrim that came to my house a while since deare friend continued he looking still earnestly upon him What treacherous Villains were those handled you in this barbarous manner Carry me hence replyed Francion good friends lend me your hands I cannot now give you satisfaction in what you demand This said the Country-men lifted him out of the Ditch and as they were carrying him to his Inne they met one of his Servants who wondered to see his Master in that equipage the service he judged then most expedient for him was to run presently for a Chirurgion who came as he was undrest by the fire-side ready to be put in bed The wound searcht was
she 's a Woman said Francion and not insensible of the communicative pleasures with a person whose merit is agreeable It may be in hopes to finger good store of Ducats she may prostitute her Body to the desires of such a silly Coxcomb but she will never bend the inclinations of her mind to love him and when she sees his Purse empty she 'l empty her thoughts of the affection she made him believe she bare him Do the worst you can Agatha as soon as I can get this crack in my Crown cured I le go again secretly to see my Mistresse and receive of her as much satisfaction as my passion can desire This discourse ended Agatha took leave of the Company and setling her self again in the Cart she advanced towards her Niece's dwelling-place with whom she had no desire to treat in that manner as she had threatned Francion for she resolved to make his game sure with Lauretta without letting him know it and give the Lawyer the Lurch This wretched sort of people are and have alwaies been greatest observers and onely admirers of those that give them most or entertaine their boundlesse thoughts with highest promises yet we scarce ever finde any of them arrive to any competent Subsistence Their life is interwoven with continuall Miseries neverthelesse their insensibility robbs them of Remords and fils their vaine hearts with joy yet 't is but a false one a meere shadow of delight and farre different from that reall hearts-ease attends those that live uprightly We have here seen Agatha's deportments and heard her speak in termes very dissolute But the nature of the Comedie requires those expressions rightly to represent the part she was to personate yet that 's not capable to make us wrie our Soules to the desire or practise of Vice quite contrary it renders Vice more hatefull to see it so lively pourtraid in its true colour Hereby we may learn what diverse Persons account delight is nothing but a debosh'd Brutality which all well temper'd Spirits will ever abominate and shun The end of the second Book THE COMIQUE HISTORY OF FRANCION The third Book AS this pernicious old Hagg bade adieu leaving those had heard her discourse much satisfied with her facetious stories into the Inne came a Coach which the Gentleman who had laine with Francion sent for to his own house in the morning betimes And after dinner seeing the Rain was past he ceased not importuning the Pilgrim till he consented to take place in the Coach telling him he was big with desire to be honor'd with his companie at his house where he might be confident to finde as good entertainment as he could expect in the unknowne Village whither he intended to goe I must acknowledge my selfe exceedingly redevable to Fortunes kindnesse continued he for addressing me into the company of a man whose acquaintance I shall be proud to purchase Coming last night with no other attendant than my Lacquay from visiting a handsome Widdow in this Country named Helina after I had supp'd with her as I pass'd this way to shorten my Journey homewards I was arrested here all night by an ill favour'd Accident which now I blesse as the cause of my greatest happinesse It was the breaking of my horses legg as he leap'd a Ditch but I would not for fifty such Coursers have missâ—d the incounter of so deserving a Person In acknowledgement of these grand civilities Francion return'd those compliments he judg'd most requisite and having said in the close of his discourse for recompence of such signall favours he would not stick to part with his blood life or any thing else could be demanded of him the Gentleman replyed That for the present he expecteâ— no further testimony of his Gratitude than that he would please to recount him the Dreame had entertained his fancy the night before So overcome with Courtesie as the Coach trundled along the pleasant Plaines Francion thus began Sir Since your ingenuous spirit desires to be recreated with the Chimerical fancies of a troubled Brain I will tell you the most Extravagant you ever yet have heard imposing on my owne accord this Law upon my Lips that if any impertinences they let fall disrelish you I shall close them with the Seale of Silence as soon as you please to discover your dislike You should never make an end said the Bourgundian Gentleman interrupting him if you would continue speaking till I bid you cease for you can say nothing but what is extreamely to the purpose and will create singular satisfaction in the hearers And though what you dreamt may be void of Reason and without Order yet I will lend you my best attention that I may the better track your fancy and pick out some signification I shall hold you no longer in expectation of the contentment you so much desire replyed the Pilgrim though I am confident Artimidorus himself would want a thred to lead him out of this Labyrinth After I had ended my Story and bid you good-night I suffered my fancy to stray after an infinity of severall thoughts I fell a building rare Designs touching my Love and Fortune the two Tyrants that prosecute my life and being thus busied I was unawares surprized by sleep I first fancied my self in a solitary Plain where I found an old man that had large Ears and his Mouth shut up with a Padlock to open which it was impossible till the Letters that serve to compose these words IT IS TIME were assembled at the key-hole Perceiving the use of Speech was forbidden him I demanded the reason of his Tongue 's restraint thinking he would have answered by Signs but placing certain hollow Horns to his Ears the better to receive my Voice he pointed with his hand to a little Wood as if the dumb language of his gesture had sent my Curiosiry thither for satisfaction When I had made my approaches something near I heard a confused pratling noise that did but unpleasantly mend the old mans defect In the midst of many others there were six Trees which instead of leaves had slender Tongues tyed to their Branches with so loose a thred as every blast of wind which then was somewhat boystrous still knock'd them one against another This Concussion made them break into a Chat so loud as I might over-hear them brawl confusedly and exchange their spight in most reproachfull tearms The Contest had not continued long before a mighty Giant that was laid under the shade suspecting they would reveal somewhat he desired to keep ever secret unsheath'd his Cimiter and gave his Arm no respite till he had beaten them down and cut them all in pieces yet they retained still so much of life as made them often leap from the ground and indeavour to continue their injurious Prattle But his Fury soon found a greater cause of increase for passing something farther he spied me leaning against a Rock where he knew I might read an ample relation
that shall inherit the Estate you leave seeing these authentique proofes of your endeavours to preserve it will magnifie your care and solemnize continuall Anniversaries to your Remembrance These considerations ought to sweeten your sorrow and make you not so much repine at a little transitorie trouble that perchance may disgust in the pursuance of your just Claime In fine by my Advice you should not let your Adversarie rest nor hearken to any composition though he should offer it you need nothing but a definitive Sentence and make you no doubt of obtaining one to your owne contentment for your Cause has Reason and Equity to plead for it Hereupon he fell a turning over Bartolus and Cujas from head to feet and cited Law-cases of all sorts to prove my Fathers Right who good Man believed all he said not considering he was then in a place where they understood nothing better than supposing of false titles and never remember any reasons but such as they know will please their Clients To be short he was directed to a sucking Proctor lately sprung up who I am confident had payed money for his reception I know to whom for there was no likelihood his practise or experience in affaires at the Courts of Judicature could have purchased him the permission to plead Neverthelesse he was not so ignorant but he knew well enough how to increase his Talent and indeed he was so good a Proctor that he procured still for himself however his Clients far'd My Father was like to succeed well in mean time This Fellow to make his profit double suffer'd himself to be gain'd by the Adverse party so played his game with both hands and instead of advancing my Father's businesse retarded it maugre all his earnest solicitations making him believe all the needlesse Demurres he made were necessary and not to be avoided All his discourse was still Monie Monie which he affirmed he must have for severall fees and other charges though there was no occasion of disbursing any thing yet my Father refused not to furnish him as oft as he desired on purpose to induce him to make more Expedition in his Businesse On the other side the Counsellor drew up I know not how many Writings with two words in a line that he might get the more And to swell up the Number his Clerk used a certain kinde of Cacographie that admitted a multitude of superfluous letters you would have judged him a sworn Enemy to those that will have men write as they speak or fancy Duâ—gardismes and spell com hav c. without e and detor dout without b. Besides he had such a full Character eech'd out with long Cloak-bag-string dashes as sometimes a whole Line will scarce containe two Words But the Words were more to be excepted against than the Letters for they signified no more than Ciphers all was but frivolous discourse that had not the least reference to the businesse in agitation This Counsellor had this pretty custome among other commendable qualities that if he had any thing to buy he would be sure to get by the first Bill or Replication came to his hands to be drawn as much money as his occasions required for he did usually calculate before-hand how many sheets would amount to such a summe which computed he presently resolved to fill them though but with old Ballades My Father reflecting upon these Abuses one day as he was paying for some such Writings could not forbear saying All he had done and scribled to that instant availed not him a tittle that he could have done as much himself and perchance more though he was not of the profession that it was but frivolous and unnecessary babbling to quote so many Cases in Law whereas he was certaine the Court never took notice of them This reproach awaked the Lawyers passion and thinking his Honour highly interessed by this accusation he returned such unhandsome language as fomented their dispute and of a private Complaint began an open Quarrell But my Father the lesse to provoke his Counsellor by imputing all the knaveries of those Gown-men to one particular person made his Attaque generall and inveighed against the whole Tribe of Practitioners from the Pettifogger to the Bencher with such expressions as spake them little lesse Monsters than they are What shame is this said he among other things that these Villaines should exercise their Robberies thus publiquely without punishment They have found out a thousand subtill tricks to cheat men of their Estates they aggravate slight Trespasses on purpose to foment Contention and if any difference betwixt Partie and Partie grow to a Law-suit they are all furnished with such malices and shifts to protract the Cause and cover their cunning Contrivances that both Plantiff and Defendant shall returne home with losse while they insensibly convey the whole Profit into their owne Pockets Can men be such fooles to be dreyned by these Blood-suckers Doe they not plainly perceive all these bundles of Bill and Answers are made meerely to deceive them To what purpose serve all these unnecessarie Procedures but to render Causes more obscure Why doe they not proceed to sentence as soone as the Parties have produced their Evidence But the worst in all these Jurisdictions is there are so many different formes and manners of proceeding I would gladly know a reason why they should not in all places use the best and shortest way to decide differences yet what need of such a question 'T is palpable enough their Avarice invented these Demurres meerely to abuse and more covertly cheat those who understand not their Pettifogging tricks You are angrie for a slight matter said the Counsellour and I dare say you complain without a cause Is there any thing the Vniverse can boast of more admirable than the manner of canvassing Causes in our Courts Is it not a mark of the Grandeur of Justice to be attended by such severall Formalities which like as many secret Springs serve each in their due Order to compleat the Frame and give motion to that great Machine which you Clients cannot observe without admiration and much contentment As for the difference of Procedures in distinct Jurisdictions it is rather to be commended than condemned for doe not you know every Countrie must have its severall Custome I will grant all you say to please you answered my Father but I am angrie that after all your triflings and our patience Justice is not rendred as it ought if at length we could have but Right done us there as no Delaies no Formalities in your Proceedings that we should think insupportable Hereupon the Counsellor alledged divers things in justification of his honourable profession yet was constrained at last to acknowledge much might be said against it but in conclusion he gave this Reason That the Divinity had sent this Scourge among Mortals to punish the enormities of their Crimes After several like Arguments he was farther urged by my Father to confesse it
was a generall Vulgar Errour to call the perplexing of a Cause with Tricks in one word Practice without distinguishing of what it is a Practice as if there were no other kind of Practice or that this had gained so great a Prerogative over all others as the onely naming that terme suffic'd to make any capacity comprehend what was meant But to return to the Processe It was referred to the most fantasticall Councellour of the whole pack And it is remarkable I know not by what disfavour of the Starres that sort of people became half fooles by that time they arrive to those grave years as render other men more respected for their sage Counsels and Deportments All that ever hitherto frequented the supreme Courts are stumbled at this observation and the most probable reason can be given in my opinion is that for the most part they are fellowes of low decrested Souls descended from Parents of despicable extractions and to keep their absurd Gravity they sequester themselves from all good Conversation passing their time onely in such studies as render them as much more stupid as they are more vile and sordid than any other persons the whole world affords My Father's Reporter through his constant solitude was become at length a perfect Misanthropos no body could boast of having any ascendance over his Spirit he was so Chymicall neither party need feare his compliance or partiality the onely danger was lest he should misconstrue or not comprehend the Cause for which he was more famous than for any other quality except an impertinent Confidence that flattered his vain credulity no mans apprehension was so quick and solid as his own The first time my Father went to see him at a distance he took him for a Cryer of Funerals and finding him standing at his dore without any Company or Attendants he was about to aske him who was lately dead in that Quarter But a young Man handsomely clad accosting this ill-looking fellow with a low Reverence made him correct his thoughts and consider he might be the Master of the House and before he made his Addresses inquiring who that spruce Yonker was he learn'd 't was his Worships Clerk who from a Groom had raised himselfe to that degree where he omitted not to use his fingers to the best advantage and curry Clients purses iustead of his Masters horses The Councellor received this visit without discovering any of the odd humors diseas'd his braine but at the next interview my Father acquainting him with some particulars concerning his owne businesse he bid him hold his peade like an ignorant Pratler that knew not what he said and send his Attorney who had more experience and Judgement to state his Case Not many dayes after my Father returning to his house the old Idiot spied his sword I know not what foolish fancy fed his feares but 't was no lesse criminall for any Gentleman to weare Weapons in his house than Spurres in the Palace and as if some danger had required his speedy opposition he presently ran to take downe an old rustie Halberd that hung in his hall and brandishing it with his trembling hands stood upon his guard at the top of the stone steps as if he meant to stop the passage into the house My Father desiring to know the reason of this Antique Posture he answered That seeing him come into his court with Armes he knew not but his designe might be to take his house by Assault and therefore he resolved to stand upon his owne defence This was onely a laughing matter but there succeeded other Passages that made my Father curse the houre he ere began his Suit and at length notwithstanding all his Attorneyes perswasive arguments and advice he went to visit his Father-in-Law offering to come to a comprimise and the better to induce him to consent I beseech you Sir said he let us speedily withdraw from this Gulfe whereinto we have imprudently cast our selves otherwise we shall be both swallowed up for my owne particular I had rather have to doe in Hell than at the Hall rather endure any torture than the perplexities of Law and I believe the greatest torment has been invented for the damned is to sow dissention among them and make them receive injuries for which they shall never obtaine reparation notwithstanding all the paines and diligence can be used Be confident when we compute our charges neither of us shall finde much advantage against his Adversary nor any thing neerer the accomplishing his designe The whole Estate we contend for will become a prey to this execrable Tribe of Villaines who live onely upon others spoiles and desire no other occasion of establishing and enriching their owne families than the Ruine and impoverishing their Clients Had not We better keep our Money than sling it away upon fellowes that ne're returne us thanks but rather thinke us beholding still to them and for three lines of writing without Sense reckon us a summe beyond Reason Let us divide betwixt us what each coveted to preserve intire for himselfe or I protest I am so harast and discouraged by the Malices of these cheating Lawyers rather than suffer my selfe any longer to be made a Prey to their insatiable Avarice I will resigne my Interest and give you peaceable possession of the Whole This free proposition arguing a generous Candour in my Father and promising much advantage to the adverse Party so won upon his humour that though before he would hearken to no Proposalls of reconcilement he relished these Reasons and onely demanded some time for more serious deliberation Meane while happy chance presenting with some advantages to my Father's unprepared eyes the Beauty of a Compleat Virgin Daughter to his Step-Father by a former Venter who from her infancy had been bred at Pension in a Religious House he ne're was satisfied with seeing her this frequent looking begat an amorous liking and liking soon grew up to such fervent love as he presently resolv'd to demand her in Marriage which desire crown'd with the Father's and her owne consent made a perfect Pacification and concluded all differences by this Conjunction to the sorrow and shame of all their lawyers who expected no such Issue Within one yeare after the solemnity of the Nuptialls the Nocturnall private toiles were recompenced with a publick joy by the Birth of a pretty Female and about the Expiration of the like terme succeeded a second Fruit of the same kinde But five yeares were elapsed after their Marriage before I had a Being my first entrance into this World was remarkable upon the same day the three Sage Kings followed the direction of the Star For my Mother having been Queen of the Beane that Night sitting at the Tables end and drinking to all her Subjects felt some Throes that forced her to quit the Company and repose upon a Bed where she was soon after delivered of me without any other assistance than the Sage Matrons Fortune had
conducted thither to divert their duller thoughts and quicken Time's slow pace with some joviall recreation Thus I was borne Dolphin but when I shall see the Royall Crowne upon my head is beyond my knowledge they dranke so many full Carouses to my health as almost made all the Barrells in our Cellar empty So you must not thinke strange if I am a deep Drinker now for finding my selfe of a competent Age and Constitution I am resolv'd now to answer proportionably all those that challeng'd me then to the Combat of the Cup and I believe I shall beare away the Palme ☞ ☞ To avoid prolixity my Mother as she conceived being not so well resolved as to prove a Nurse delivered me unto a Farmers Wife of a neighbouring Village to be fostered nor doe I pretend to passe my verdict whether or no she did well to suffer me to suck any bodyes milke save her owne for that in the first place I am not so unnaturall a Son as to pry into her Actions for that I 'le assure you it concernes me not at all since I never sucked from my Nurse any humours which might be displeasing unto Men of Wit and Courage True it is that I doe remember I was taught as other children are a thousand fopperies invented by the Vulgar instead of being brought up by degrees even from my youth in high concernments and being accustomed to speak nothing that might favour of lownesse or Basenesse but since that time to my comfort be it spoken I did accustome my selfe to that which was praise-worthy And I must needs tell you by the by a pretty passage which happened unto me after I was weaned and thus it was I so excessively loved Pap that it became my daily food Now as the Maide had set the Skillet over the Fire in my Chamber whilst that I was yet a bed she was called upon from out the Yard and she leaving her Skillet on the Hearth went to know what was the matter in the meane while a crafty Ape which one of our neighbours had of late privately kept coming forth from under a Bed where be lay hid and having observed as you may imagine how formerly the children were used to be fed with Pap he seized upon the Skillet and taking the Pap all bespattered my face therewith after which he brought me all my cloaths and taking me up he did put them me on after a new Mode thrusting my Legs into my Coat sleeves and my Armes into my Stockins nor can you believe but that I cryed to some tune the uglinesse of the Animall terrifying me not a little But the Maid who was otherwise busied came never the faster for all that My Father and Mother being gone to the Church Finally the Ape having thus perfected his Comedy leaped out at the Widow upon the next Tree and thence gained his Masters house The Maide returning a while after and finding me in such a Jack of Lent like posture wherein the Ape had left me blessed her selfe a thousand times over and over skreeking and rouling her eyes too and fro being much astonished at length appeasing me with blandishments she asked me who had thus tricked me up and by reason I had formerly heard say that the Devill was some ugly thing I told her that it was a little boy as illfavoured as the Devill for I took the Ape who had a green Coat on to be a boy Nor was I so much mistaken therein as a Switzer who meeting with an Ape at a Taverne doore gave him a sixe pence to change and perceiving that in stead of the change which he expected the Ape made mouths at him he incessantly called on him saying speak little Boy wilt thou not returne me the change of my Moneys whence it may be the proverb sprang which saith making of Mouths Friskings and Flouts are the payment of Apes but this Switzer was not cousened alone for a Coridon being sent with a basket of Peares to a Lord at his coming into the house met with two great Apes on the top of the staires who immediately seizing on his basket shared best part of the Fruits now by reason the Apes had fine Coats on of cloath of Gold and Daggers by their sides which rendered them very Worshipfull Gentlemen to the Clownes thinking he having never seen the like before took off his Hat and made them a formall Leg the Apes having sufficiently stuffed themselves the Clown proceeded to make enquiry after the Lord to whom making his present the Master of the house asked him why he had not brought the basket full the Coridon made answer so it was Sir but the little Gentlemen your Sons took the halfe of the Peares and the jest was so much the better for that the Lord was so ugly a Gentleman as that a Coridon might well have supposed the Apes to have been his Off-spring and whereby you may take notice that since aged persons did take such creatures to be children it s no wonder I my selfe did so being as then but a boy But to returne to our Maid who was in downe-right earnest conceiting with her selfe that no children were come into our house nor any strange person whatsoever she really and firmely believed that some maligne spirits had played me this pranke and after she had unloosed and well washed me she did cast above a Pinte of holy Water about the Room My Mother being returned from the Church and finding the Maid thus busied she demanded of her the cause thereof and the poore silly wench told all that had past and the pickle wherein she had found me as also spending her judgement on the whole that assuredly it was a Devil that was come into the chamber Now my Mother although she was not of S. Thomas his kin yet she related the story to my Father who laugh'd at it and said it was but a meere whimsey endeavouring to perswade the maid out of her Christian name and making her believe that there was no such thing as she had related but one of my Fathers men coming immediately after the maid into the chamber and having seen me in the said pickle whereas she question'd me on the premisses did change the suspition which my Father harboured that the maid might be deceived by reason of her simplicity The knavish Ape came back againe to our house the following night and having emptied a purse-full of Counters which he had spread about the table in the Hall just as if he had been casting up of Accounts and getting into the Kitchin he there having flung down severall Platters and Dishes before day made his retreat again betwixt the barres of a small window which had never a shut and which was his accustomed passage Now when the maids had discovered the pranks which he had plaid they told them unto my Father and Mother who were thereby almost induced to beleive that a Spirit did indeed haunt our house And the
be Gluttons and yet we were constrained to dip our hands in the dish one after the other by a Mathematicall rule our Pedant accounted those his darlings who were satisfied with such a small proportion as was allotted them but you may imagine that they were Cockneyes daintily Pompered up and who were soon glutted but as for my selfe it was otherwise with me for I was not brought up so delicately however I had never a whit the better there although my Master would out-face me that I did eate more than foure others when as God knowes I had but my just allowance Finally it was unpossible for me to ingratiate my selfe with him and at our Meales he continually harped upon a Lecture of abstinency which was alwaies meant to me he alledged Cicero who saith That a Man must onely Eate to Live not Live to Eate and thereunto he annexed severall Examples of the Sobriety of the Antients nor did he forget the story of the Captaine who was found a rooting of Turnipps for his repast moreover he manifested unto us how that when the body is over-burdened with humours the spirits could not exercise their necessary functions telling us that we were put to him to study and not to glut our selves with Meat that therefore we should have a greater respect to the one than to the other But if any Physitian had been present and had sided with us as having the better cause he would have confuted our Pedant and proved that there is nothing worse for children than to make them Fast Besides doe you not thinke that he had a great deale of reason to preach Abstinency whilest eight of us were preying upon one poor leg of Mutton he had a whole Capon to himselfe so that never was Tantalus more tempted in Hell by those lovely Apples which he could not obtaine than we were by those dainty morsells which we durst not touch And whensoever any of us chanced to commit an Error he then enjoyned him a very profitable Pennance as to himselfe for he put them out of Commons for some certaine dayes and kept them at Bread and Water whereby he also kept cleane Sheets and spared the Money he should have laid out in Rods. Now on Holy dayes aâ— against Twelfetide Shrovetide Bartholmew-Faire and the like he never treated us a jot better unlesse we contributed every one of us a Crown extraordinary nor was he as then any loser by the great Feasts which he made us by reason that having accustomed us to Fast all the yeare long he then contented us with little or nothing for some few boyled Poultry and other small Foule and a little wasted Cates stood us instead of Lucullus and Appicius their most sumptuous Banquets and of which our Pedant never made mention but by his branding of them with the title of Infamous Hogs and Churls And by these and such like meanes he enriched himselfe to the great losse and griefe of our poor bellyes which cryed out vengeance against him and really there was nothing I apprehended so much as that the Spiders would make their Cobwebs on my Jawes by reason of my not stirring of them and keeping them in their due exercise at the usuall houres of repast And its best knowne unto God what shifts I was forced to make and how I was very often constrained to conjure for a belly-full When the Principall of our Colledge who was a very brave sparke was monyed and gave entertainment to his Friends we were present at the Feast and at the serving up of the last course with the Fruit we presented severall Epigrams unto the Guests who in returne of our Verses gave such a parcell of Tarts Custards Fruit and such like quickshawes and sometimes also some small fowle which were not as yet taken from the board as that we were faine to tip the seams of our Gownes to stuffe them up therein just like unto a Wallet And the best meales that ever I did eate at the greatest Princes Tables of the world never were so pleasing and delicious unto me as those conquests which I purchased by my Poetry O you most pitiffull Verses which I have since that time made which never as yet did produce me any salary I prized so high as those which I preferred before an Empire Nor was I lesse pleased when at the solemne Feast of our Lord the Advocate unto whom my Father had recommended me sent and invited me to dinner since that for my sake the good people inlarged their ordinary with some minc'd Pyes which I assaulted and fell aboard on with as much resolution as a couragious and magnanimous King would besiege a Rebellious City But together with my dinner my mirth was at a stand being straightway examined concerning my progresse in Learning and in case I gave not a punctuall and ready account thereof I was threatned that my Father should be made acqainted therewith It is an unquestionable truth that let a child be of what disposition soever he will he will be sure to be more addicted to play than to study as I my selfe was in those dayes however though I say it my selfe I must needs tell you that I was one of the learnedst of all our Classis whereby I lost nothing neither for the Advocate perceiving my ingenuity he alwayes gave me some few shillings which he put upon the account of my Fathers Law-suits and with this money in stead of playing at Tennis I bought certaine bookes which they call Romances containing the prowesse of the Knights of old and not long after one of my companions lent me one to read called Morgant the Giant which absolutely bewitched me having never before read any thing but Ciceroe's familiar Epistles and Terences Comedies at length I was wisht to a Book binder upon the Pontneuf who did sell such like fabulous Histories and thither I carryed my whole stock of moneys but my Trade I 'le assure you was a speciall one for I had such longing desire to possesse that which I had a minde to buy as that I never stood to bargaine with the Book-seller but ever gave him his owne price for feare I should misse of my purchase so greedy was I after my prey and he full well knew whom he had to deale withall I protest unto you Sir that at this time I desire to be as ignorant as I was then at that time in regard I should enjoy a great deale of pleasure in perusing such like trifling stories whereas at present I am constrained to make-another guesse divertisement for that I cannot light upon any one Author that pleaseth me unlesse I could passe by his extravagance for to tell you the truth though I knew where all Books are to be found yet know I not where to finde a good one nay I will hereafter prove unto you that there is not one good book in all the world when as I shall treat of this paradoxe and evidence unto you how that in
bid me let him alone I will not dissemble but that there was much malice on my side and that expresly I did it to revenge my self of the cruelty which he had exercised on me For if my Companion had continued to act his part I would not have been so mischievous unto him but I assure you never in any Mummery was there more contentment taken than at our play where the successe did arrive so pleasingly I had the glory given me for having played my part the best of all the Actors who were some of them of the rudest sort of the people of Paris and according to the instructions of our Regent who had in him no more humanity than a Hoggard had every one of them a fair Handkerchief in his hand for want of a more gracefull posture and did pronounce their verses as if they were singing them and oftentimes with a far shriller and a more disagreeing tone than any of the rest To doe well I did quite contrary to that which my Master taught me and when I was to salute any one my reverence was after the manner of the Court and not according to the mode of the Children of the Holy Ghost whom he constrained us to imitate And for other things I used no other gestures nor made any traverses on the Stage but only at such time as reason did direct me but I had leasure to repent that I had so well personated the Fury for my Regent observing that all the College and many personages of Honour in the City did laugh at him did take on me an exemplary revenge and for the first fault which I afterwards committed he with his Rods did so pink my breech that a barber Chirurgion doth not mangle more the back of a sick person to whom he doth apply his Cupping-glasses At that time I lived with Hortensius as I was before accustomed yet he did intreat us more severely than in the years precedent and the Winter being extremely cold finding that he would allow us no fire we were constrained to burn the boards of our Studies the straw of our Beds and afterwards our Theam-books to procure us a little heat One day he was pleased to take the pains to visit my Library and finding there many sabulous Histories in the French tongue he carried them all away with him alleging that they corrupted my good Inclinations and did pervert my spirit for it must be as he said Amongst those Books he found some so amorous that they served much to inflame his heart with the love of the Daughter of the Advocate who payed my Pension Take notice by the way that Love triumphs as much over the square Cap of the Pedant as over the Crowns of Kings And that which did the more invite him to follow the Command of that little God was that he did see his power to be reverenced and esteemed almost amongst all the Books of the Philosophers Being overcome by so agreeable a Temptation he began to seek out all means to please his Lady and did apparel and dresse himself more richly and more curiously than before he was accustomed to doe for whereas before he changed his linnen but once a month he now changed it every fortnight Every morning he turned up his Mustachioes with the handle of a hot spoon and the Botcher our Porter was imployed to make two dayes to put nâ—w sleeves to his old Cassock and to mend it every where were it never so much torn in pieces He never before did behold his own face but in a bucket of water but now he became so prodigal as to buy a very large Looking-glasse in which he ceased not to observe if he made his Reverences with a good grace and with what a plausible carriage his other ordinary Actions were attended and sometimes he did put himself to too much trouble for he had a desire to see in how good a posture he did read and having cast his eyes down on Tully which he had in his hands he would lift them up to look on his glasse but he could not thus content his Desire because he found the Image which was there represented did lift up its head as well as himself and at that instant did not look down upon the Book insomuch that at the same time he would have been very willing to turn his eyes into two places at once And although he was carefull enough of his Body yet he purposed to gain the good will of his Mistresse not by that meanes only the qualities of his Mind which seemed to him to be far more eminent were those forces in which he most confided Every day he turned over the leaves of the Books of Love which he had taken from me and from thence collected those Discourses which in his judgement seemed best to fill his mouth and to rectifie his understanding Amongst those Volumes there was one full of Metaphors and barbarous Antitheses and of such extraordinary Figures that no Name is to be given to them it was a gallamoffry so continued and confused that the most apprehensive spirit in the world must be obliged to demand What is it if he had a desire to understand it Neverthelesse he called this Author the French Cicero and formed all his stile according unto his unlesse that from some other of his time he took certain Phrases which to him seemed admirable because they were not common although there were so many faults in them that a Costard-monger who sells Fruit in the corner of a street would have discovered them and reproved him and his goodly Authors with him I come now to account unto you the Discourse which he held with his Mistress following therein those Books which he had read One day going to visit her Father and finding her alone Madamoisell said he I gain in losing and I lose in gaining that at this time losing the company of Monsieur your Father I gain yours which yet makes me to be a loser in another sense for I do lose my liberty in hearing your Discourse The incomparable charms of your incomparable perfections which none can magnifie enough do so assail me and hold me captive under their feet that he is deprived of Reason who believeth he is able to defend himself against them wherefore this shall alwayes be the Cause for which I will make bold to stile my self your incomparable Servant Fremond for so the Damosel was called had something to do to return an answer to so extravagant a Salutation In a short time she perceived the solly of the Person which before she never saw so manifestly discovered She could make her marker well enough and the young Sparks of the College who were my Companions told me they found by her deportment and complexion that she loved the trade and certainly they were not much mistaken for in the fourth year of her age being deprived of her Mother her jovial and frolick humor did afterwards transport
rest should follow by turns Hortensius having read this Answer did throw it into the fire affirming that he would have nothing to doe with the affections or the Feasts of Fremond and being more wise for the time to come he did swear that he would indear himself no more to any Girles but the Muses who also do allure us because they are of that deceitfull Sex Although the Message his old Mistresse did send unto him was full of flatteries yet he would never endure the frequentation of her Company any more neverthelesse he discontinued not to wear a Sword and hath ever since lived on his Revenues and what he hath gained by translating some Books out of Latin into French or by being a Corrector of the Presse I finished all the course of my studies in the same College paying my pension to the Usher where nothing arrived worthy of recital but what already I have related to you and the Vacations of the year of my Philosophy being come I was commanded by my Father to take my leave of the College and to return to Brittany When I was in my own Country I saw the end of all my happinesse I was perpetually vexed by being demanded in what Calling I would imploy my self my ears were furred with the importunate clamors and counsells of my friends who would have me study Humanity and the tedious Volumes of the Law to be one of the Counsellers in Parlament but opinions do change when age comes on and my Father afterwards hated no men more than those of the long Robe as since he hath made it appear by one who married my Sister And my Mother desirous to comply with him in all things did seem to desire as well as himself to have me a Counsellor of the Law This did rellish so ill with me that it is impossible to represent it to you At that time I declamed within my self against the wickednesse of the Age where the natural Laws are corrupted and the most generous Spirits are constrained to take upon them a great charge to trouble their repose and cannot live in Quiet which is a blessing that is not denyed unto Beasts From day to day I delayed to learn that dangerous knowledge which I have always hated more than the plague it being the cause of the greatest part of our Vexations Being on the point to forsake my Fathers house he did fall extremely sick In vain the Physicians round about him did their endeavour to recover him so it was that he dyed and left his Wife and Children much afflicted for so great a losse After his death my Mother who accorded with me in all things which I desired did leave off the Resolution she had taken to force me to take the long Robe and because I was a stranger in Brittany being accustomed to the Air of Paris I besought her that she would permit me to return thither she demanded of me what I would do there I replyed to her that I would passe away some time in learning honest exercises and that I would indeavour to put my self in the service of some Prince My Brothers in Law did give their advice upon it and represented to me that Fortune reign'd most imperiously at the Court and shewed there the greatest effects of her inconstancy And briefly when I presumed to be in the highest degree of all her favours she would throw me down into the bottom of despair All this did not detere me I had nothing in my head but the greatnesse of the world In the end they gave me leave to put in practice my intention I returned to Paris and lodged in the University which I could not forget I was afterwards acquainted with a Man who had Chambers ready furnished and took Pensioners and I dayly repaired to a Player on the Lute a Fencer and a Dancer to learn their art so that one hour was to exercise my self in one faculty and the other in another I imployed all the remainder of my time to read indifferently all manner of Books and I learned more in three months than I did before in seven years in the College when I heard those Pedantick absurdities which did so corrupt my judgement that I believed all the Fables of the Poets to be true stories and did conceive to my self that there were Sylvans and Dryades in the Forests Nayades in the Fountains and Nereides in the Sea Moreover I believed that whatsoever was spoken of transformations was true and I never saw a Nightin gall but I believed it was the Kings Daughter of Thracia Neither was I alone abused in this conceit for I know a great many more and some Masters themselves who were of the same opinion As these old Errors were chased out of my understanding I filled it with better knowledge and setting my self to review my notes of Philosophy which our Regent had dictated unto me I did confer them with the best Authors I could find so that by my industry I was sufficiently instructed in every Science for a man that would not make a particular profession of them In the midst of these various entertainments I lived about a year in the greatest solitude in the world and very seldom did goe out of doors and walked then no further than on the old Banks which were near unto my lodging I was only visited by two or three young Gentlemen with whom I was acquainted I remember that one day there came with them one of this Country whose name was Raymond who some few days afterwards returned without any one in his company Looking in my Coffer after he was gone I found my little Box empty in which I had put at least threescore Crowns I remembred that I left him alone in my Chamber not suspecting him to be so light finger'd as he was When ever I saw him I spoke openly unto him what I though and we came to very sharp words which I followed with threats In the end I demanded of him if our controversies on the next morning should be decided by the Sword in some place out of the City He answered me that he could not then meet me because he was very early to go out of Town according to his promise to some of his Companions with whom he was to travell into Flanders The next day I sought all over Paris for him but could not find him and since I never saw him and do not know what is become of him O how great was my grief of heart to have lost my money with which I intended to have appareld my self being about to leave off my mourning habit to write unto my Mother for more would be more hurtfull than profitable for she would not be perswaded but that I had lost it at play and would have sent me nothing but Reproofs I received a Letter from her wherein she represented that I was poorer than I thought my self to be and that my Father had left many debts to
Hell One cried out others domineer'd some did run some with great violence did carry others to prison On no side could be seen the least shadow of content Having observed these sad examples of the brutishnesse of men I return'd to my own Lodging but so full of Indignation that I cannot expresse it After Dinner being at my Window I descryed my young Coxcomb the Counsellor passing through the Street but in what Equipage think you in the Equipage of a Signior I was never more astonished He had a Cloak of three-piled Velvet of a Carnation colour his Breeches were of Velvet of the same colour and his Doublet of White Sattin his thigh was armed with a Sword of Miramont and he was mounted on a barbed Steed and followed by three lusty Lackeys I enquired of my Host if at Paris Men of the long Robe were also Men of the Sword He made answer to me that young Gentlemen as was that Counsellor whom I beheld did not take upon them the formality of the Gown but only for a quality to gain them the more respect to procure them Wives with greater Dowries and that their age leading them to the civilities of the Court when they are once out of it they are permitted to take the sword and the habit of a Cavalier Perceiving in what miserie I was I did wish I had been of the Profession to which my Father did perswade me but I conceived it would be a dishonor to be in the company of such vile people At that time I did feel to the quick the pricking thorns of my miâ—fortune for being cloathed with such poor habit there was not any one who did esteem me and in this forlorn condition I durst not wear a Sword for instead of serving to be a witnesse of my generous extraction it would make me to be taken by the most sotish people of all the Cities in the Earth for a lazie Vagabond In the mean time every day I suffer'd a thousand Indignities I dare not say patiently for I dare assure you if Power had answered to my Will I had throughly punished those stupid fellows that offended me One morning I entred into the Court of the Louvre thinking it had been a place of Respect where I should receive pleasure from the Variety of severall Objects and not be baffled as I had been at other places As I did regard that pompous Edifice looking sometimes on one side and sometimes on the other a Page who observed by my action that I was not accustomed to come thither supposing me to be a simple Novice did take my hat by the Brim and gave it such a twirl that it turned eight times quite round my head I had shewed him effectually who it was he had abused but that behind him I observed ten or twelve Lackeys who seemed to be there present to defend him I told him that he did me wrong to touch me since I never offended him At that he and his Companions opened their mouths altogether and called me Citizen for it is a word of derision which that Kennell doth give to those whom they esteem to be simple Fellowes in which number they comprehended all those who do not follow the Court. It is the infamy of this age that those people who are so despicable and so abject that it is impossible to expresse them should abuse a Name which hath been and is in so many Cities so passionately desired Neverthelesse understanding the malice of their mistake I took the boldnesse to intreat them to look more earnestly on him to whom they did addresse their words assuring them they would find I am not the Man whom they did take me to be And turning from them to be gone they followed me with absurd laughter and impertinent language and demanded of me what I was If I was not a Citizen I made answer I am that which you will never be and which it is impossible that you can desire to be because you have neither the courage nor the apprehension to be as I am To speak in that manner to those ignorants was to speak Greek unto them and I did repent my self that I took such Brutish things into my consideration at whom I ought not to be angry although they should have spurn'd me with their feet because they are Creatures deprived of Reason and have not the sence when they are chastised to understand that it is because they should return no more unto their follies This consideration working in my Spirit I retreated from them but this cursed crew taking offence at the last words which I spake did run after me to torment me The Page making a semblance as if he would strike his staff upon the ground did hit me so violently upon the Feet that at every blow I leaped up as if I were cutting so many Capers The Lackeys also being prepossessed with the simplicity of my deportment did assault me all at once and there was one of them who affirmed that they must tosse me in a Blanket Being excessively provoked at that word I suffered my self to be transported to the first motions of choler and retiring a little from them I did swear like a Waggoner wet quite thorough and covered with Durt Come forth and you dare unto me and giving me but a Sword Do you fall upon me all at once You shall see if I fear you or not you vile puddle you have no valor at all but when altogether you assault one Man who hath no Armes to defend himself If you have not the desire to gratifie me in letting me dy valiantly in my own defence doe one of you kill me for I shall no longer live but to my grief and on the other side I have mis-fortunes enough which do cause me to desire Death Their blind and stupid Rage was inflamed by these words when a great lump of flesh covered with blew Sattin and gold lace did approach unto them I know not on my faith whether it were a man or not but I discovered the form of a Body as for his Soul it was all brutish He was a Baron as afterwards I understood and was the Master of the little Page that did prosecute me He said to the three buffles who stood with their hats in their hands Tell me you Waggs Is not my Page a gallant Boy mark but the pleasant sport he makes he is a Boy of Wit and Spirit The Page hearing the praise which his Master gave him did determine with himself to make that Virtue yet more manifest for which he did esteem him and came unto me to give me a tweak on the Nose but I thrust him back so violently that I thought I had thrown him on his back The Baron who carryed an eye over him was angry and twirling his Mustachioes with one hand and threatning me with the other he said unto me You Sirrah look to your self if you abuse my Page I shall strap you as
to stay within doors all the Winter although it were a grievous punishment unto me for after some weeks I had seen a young and a most beautifull Wonder at her Fathers Door in that Street that joyneth to St. James and her attractions with such advantage had triumphed over my liberty that I did nothing else but sigh after her But what should I doe to have come out of my bondage Love is a mortal Enemy to Poverty I durst not shew my self to Diana for that was the Name of the Queen of mâ— heart I must be accommodated in another fashion for she had received some Impressions in relation to me which were not favourable In my Solitude I had no other imployment but to think of her and that was the Cause that my passion did inflame it self the more I was such a fool that I took some pleasure to passe every Evening by her door although it was to me the most unprofitablest trouble in the world In that time I could have joyned in the same Trade with some deboist Scholars of the City by whom I found it was an easie thing in a short time to supply my self with new habiliments for every night they did nothing else but steal Cloaks in a street in the Suburbs where were some scattered houses but I could never condescend to make my Spirit to stoop to such an infamous action I therefore entertained the Acquaintance of certain Philosophers who promised me Mountains of Gold by a way lawfull and honourable neverthelesse at the last I abandoned their conversation because I found they were but sellers of smoak who were unwilling to communicate themselves unto me because having nothing to lose their trompery would be of no use in my behalf In the beginning I was at least as subtile as themselves and making them believe that I had a round Sum of money coming out of the Country with which I would assist them in buying that which was necessary for the perfecting of their great work I did invite them to teach me many of the Secrets of their Natural Magick which in several occasions I have since made use of And this was some profit that I received in frequenting their Company Afterwards I addicted my self to another study which was Poetry in our Tongue with which I was so much taken that I shall for ever be inchanted with it my ordinary imployment was to make verses on the hatred which I did bear to the iniquity of the times and on my love to gentle Diana But. Good God what works were they in comparison of those which I am now able to perform All I did was after the mode of the College and there appeared in it neither neatnesse nor judgement I might safely swear that at that time I had never read a good piece in verse and the Authors from whom I might learn any thing were unknown unto me as well by my own negligence as my Regents so that all which I could doe was to admire what was sung by the old Poets of Greece in whose works we do find so many remarkable faults because that all proceeded from their invention and they had nothing to lay before them as a Pattern and one thing at the same time cannot be invented and made perfect Take notice in no place better than in this that the Muses are pleased to dwell with Poverty you shall seldom see a rich man to delight in making verses And the great possessions of the Goods of Fortune are the cause that men delude themselves and neglect to possesse the endouments of the mind Neverthelesse for Poesie there is nothing more pleasing to the Spirit or more usefull for Men in putting a great distinction betwixt our selves and Beasts It was in that time alas that I beheld my self frustrated of all Hopes which I had a long time nourished in my Soul I traced my adventures over and over to see if I could there meet with any that might parallel with those great personages whose History I had read and I imagined that undoubtedly I should find an issue equal unto theirs trusting in my courage and the inclination which I had to follow whatsoever was virtuous Oh how blind I was as not to fee the infinite obstacles which did oppose my good fortune although I had a valour more admirable than any of the antient Knights If I had not laid down on Paper the transportations of my choler I had inevitably fallen into the most violent Despair of the world Was it not wonderfull and did it not cure me against the rules of Nature After I had described my evill I did find it no more so violent upon me although I perceived the effects thereof most lively represented Will any Man of Reason now deny that Apollo was esteemed the God of Physick as well for the remedy which his verses do give unto the desperate wounds of the Soul as for what his herbs do give to the diseases of the Body which he causeth to grow when he taketh upon him the quality of the Sun to make the earth fruitfull So much had Francion spoke when his courteous Host locking his hand in his did say unto him It is enough for this time I perceive it groweth late I am afraid you afflict your self with too much speaking and with those words be caused him to cease but before he would take his leave of him he did entertain him yet a little longer and said unto him that truly he had been injurious to himself by indeavouring to hinder himself from the further knowledge of his Pedantick adventurrs but Sir said he I believe you endured torment enough for the losse of your Silver if I remember it aright you told me that his name was Raymond who took it from you would you make him suffer for it if you could find him out I professe unto you said Francion that as often as I remember the miseries which he made me to endure my rage doth kindle as red against him as ever for his fact was extremely odious and the more because he was descended of an honourable Family and of the richest in France The Signior of the Castle having a Custom with him not usual of which few can find out the Cause did say unto him That it was possible that this Raymond had taken his money in a wanton humor and not for necessity intending to conceal himself from his Parents and to lead a deboyst life in Flanders and therefore if Francion would look after him he would endeavour to inform him if he were in Burgundy or not that so he might call him to a strict accompt for it but Francion made answer That it would be the most ridiculous thing in the world if he should witnesse that he carried about him the Remembrance of such antient offences his Host neverthelesse promised him that he would inquire If in Burgundy or thereabouts there were any Gentleman who is or hath been known by the Name
ever since I have a great Desire to be called by the Name of that goodly Heritage Good God! said I to my self What is this A Man who thinks himself one of the bravest in the world is ambitious to carry the Name of a few Acres of Land when the Land should be known by the Name of the Master of it How ridiculous is this absurdity Why doth he not rather purchase some gallant Title by his atchievments Turning my self to the other side I observed two in a serious Discourse which made me the more attentive What is your judgement said one of them on my Suit of Cloaths Is it not of an excellent stuff and as good as ever was made at Lyons Is not my Taylor well versed in the Fashion He is a Man of Understanding and I will advance him if I can There is a Citizen hath a good Office in the Exchequer who is not to be compared to him But what think you of my Hat Doth the Fashion of it please you Alas Sir answered the other I find all things you wear to be extremely compleat that the more I doe contemplate you the more I am ravished with admiration I am of opinion that the Angels are not better cloath'd in Heaven than you are on Earth although they have every one of them six Ells of Stuff of a sky-colour embroydered with Starrs to make them a Suit Good God! You are Adonis himself What deep sighs doth Venus fetch for you What a charm do those Roses carry on your cheek The two even Ranks of your white teeth have power in them enough to murder a heart Neverthelesse Excuse me if I tell you Sir that your Hat doth flap a little on the one side thereof The Brims are with the largest Cause them to be cut more narrow Let me be your Counsellor of Estate in this affair I speak unto you as a Friend Far be it from me to disparage you I see well enough that you are accoutred with other rare Vertues for you have a pair of Boots the best made in the world and above all your hair is so well curled that I believe the Soules therewith intangled and made prisoners do wander up and down as in a Labyrinth of Pleasure The other kissing his cheek did reply Dearest of my Friends You better deserve those praises which you give me than my self It is known to the world that your brave Qualities do cause you to be cherished even by Majesty it self You are the Loadstone who attracteth all both Male and Female to you at the Court The Ladies for all their inexorableness are wounded with the Arrows of your Eys and acknowledge they feel no sires but what are lighted from your beauties The other made answer to him with a strange boasting It was true enough there were some Ladies who did love him and to give him a proof of what he said he did pull out of his pocket a Love-letter which it is possible he did write himself although he said It came from his Mistresse This Discourse was nothing pleasing to me I therfore turned aside to the Conference of some others which was not much better They judged of the affairs of State as a blind man doth of Colours And he who spake of his Acres of Land thinking himself to be the most judicious in the Company did affirm That since the King dismissed him of a Lieutenant ship which he had there hath been nothing but Disorder in France and that he was the Man who for so long a time did maintain the Kingdom in peace Afterwards they came to speak of War and every one of them did make a relation of the Imaginary exploits he had performed There were some of them who said That their Pages were called Squires to shew only in what reputation their Masters were and if they committed any Imployment to their charge it was to show that they were most deeply ingaged themselves I was so weary to see and understand their a pish follies that I would have given any thing to be gone At the last they all standing up to salute a Signior called Clerantes who was newly entred I found the opportunity to escape away in the Confusion having made a short reverence to the Company who I thought had taken no great notice of me At my departure having met with him who caused me to goe in I told him That the Gentlemen whom I had seen had no doubt a great deal of Eloquence with them but it was according to the condition of this Age in which to speak much is to speak well but there was nothing so sottish or vain as their Spirits that if the Court had not more generous Personages I was well contented not to trouble it and that I abstained from talking not the better to understand them or to gain from their language or experience but because I would not administer an occasion to be troubled to discourse with them which would have proved more tedious to me if particularly they had addressed themselves unto me I related to him how I observed their Vanity using seven or eight affected words at the beginning middle and the end of every clause which they thought to be courtly and very gracefull when it was most ridiculous as Sir Most undoubtedly you have the whole Property of it You are acute in Love and Musick You have all the habitudes with the Ministers of the affairs of State You are in a very good Posture with Monsieur the Treasurer You are here in the great Commerce of the world You are intricate and not to be fathomed and such other terms newly invented The Answer which my Friend did make unto me was That by the train of the Lackeys at the Gate be knew what persons were in the House and that they were Lords and Gentlemen who were esteemed to be the best wits in France to which I made Reply That in the Country of the Blind he who hath but one eye is King there But as since I have understood Clerantes knowing me because elsewhere I had been shewn unto him demanded of Lucy If she received not much pleasure in my Company for said he I am informed that this Gentleman makes very good verse and hath the clearest fancy and the smothest language and the livelyest accents in the world I have heard it so spoken said Lucy but nothing lesse appeared to me I believe it was his Statue sent hither by Art Magick rather than himself I saw I must confesse a dumb motion which made no answer to what I demanded of him but only by nodding of its head and in the same manner departed without the least complement You shall find said Clerantes that something discontented him who was it that gave you the knowledge of him Lucy made answer it was the Gentleman who did bring him to her house Some few days afterwards Clerantes spake unto him and according to his directions I repaired unto Clerantes with
Elementary fire shall never quench thy thirst although thy Physician with a nose as red as a Lobster doth perscribe thee to flea an Eel by the tail and to rost it against the Wind with the end of a great Log that shall go directly into Germany to protest unto the Protestants that Chitterlings do fly like a Tortoise and that on the year passed we shall see the Water of Seine sold more cheap than the blood of a Bullock Having ended this goodly Speech he did begin to laugh as loud as possibly he could and you may believe that those who heard him did not forget to doe the like but Clerantes Chamberlain did laugh more loud than any which the Advocate perceived and having given him two or three sound blowes with his fist he said unto him Canst thou not hold thy Peace thou ignorant Dost thou think I came hither to make thee laugh Hold your peace all of you said Clerantes I observe he hath some businesse of importance to declare unto me I will relate unto you a little Fable said he which steals into my Fancy from the backward shop of my Brain The Cacochymick Aesop hath nothing of it The Eagle more mindfull of Prey than Honour did one day mootch from the Thunder which lame Vulcan had made as crooked as himself for Almighty Iupiter A very fool the Eagle was to commit so great an oversight for every one did honour him before as the bearer of those Arms with which that great God doth punish all offences but be took more pleasure to be at freedom and plunder the Inhabitants of the Air. Iupiter being angry took two Pigeons and did prefer them to the same Office in which the Eagle was This is enough Gentlemen to inform you that the Court shall know if it pleaseth that my cause is right enough it being grounded upon an Hypothesis It was Saturn himself who played his part on my side when he was a Sergeant There came a great Thunderbolt which troubled all things The Sun fell into the Sea with fifty Stars who were his Pages They drank so deep that in the twinkling of an eye you might see them lye all dry upon the Sands which is the place from whence ever since we have received their light After that I threw my hat amongst the Stones and I know not what is become of it or any thing else In the pursuce of this humour he did speak a thousand times without reason by which it was perceived that he had a troubled brain Clerantes conceiving that I was he who brought him to his Chamber did imagine I had done it to give content unto him having called me he understood that I knew nothing of the distraction of the Man But to put the Advocate in a good humout I caused all those idle fellowes to depart the room who did too much incense him with their petulancies I did speak friendly and pleasantly unto him and giving him respect I did seem to a dmire his words which did invite him to return as pleasing words to me and I did put on so discreet a Restraint that I did not seem to laugh at all On the same day there came certain men to demand him his Servants brought them to Clerantes to whom they declared that he was their Kinsman and had a troubled Spirit for the grief he received in the losse of all his estate being overthrown by his Adversary in a Sute of Law and that in charity they would provide for him in their own houses although he had done them great mischief in the violent fits of his distempers I will ease you of that trouble said Clerantes he is come to offer himself to me I have a desire to retain him and give him good use His Kinsmen being glad to be discharged of him did leave him with Clerantes who immediatly did give him thâ— name of Collinet and commanded that he should be apparalled like a Gentleman There passed away some Weeks before he fell into his excesse of madnesse and during that time he would deliver himself very acutely and sometimes very eloquently although to speak the truth he was always extravagant in his Discourse The prohibition which was given to all the Servants not to incense him by their provoking words was the cause that he did not leap into his rages nor become to mischievous as he and others of his distemper are accustomed to be One could not but receive coutentment in his Company and there was not any man of quality who came unto the house but would be glad sometimes to listen to him and to see him perform some pleasant actions I was his only Governour he called me good Master and Clerantes good Lord. When I would touch any one to the quick I would by one artifice or other discover his vices to him of which he would afterwards upon any occasion give so lively a Character that many who heard him discourse so to the purpose would believe that he was not out of his wits but counterfeited In his youth he had so clear a Spirit that the marks thereof did still remain Sometimes he would give admirable answers without any instructions of mine Having heard us to speak of a Signior who was baffled in his reputation and yet was accounted by some to be an affable and a courteous man he mantained that he was the most discourteous man in the World the reason being demanded he said that the day before he observed him to be so incivil that he would not go out of the way to give his Brother the upper hand who to his knowledge was more aged and more deserving than himself It being told him that he mistook for that Signior had no Brother at all He made answer I do know he hath many Brothers and he that passed by him was one of them he was one of the gallantest Asses that ever I saw Another time as we were making a motion to play at dice he said he would not play against the Signior because he always carryed an Ace under his Doublet Having met him one day in the Louvre he approached to him and gave him hay out of his Pocket The Signior turning to him and asking him what he did mean by it Make much of that which I give you said Collinet it will prove good food for thee in time of necessity The Signior was so full of Honour that he would not be angry but did turn it into laughter But not long afterwards intending to be revenged of him he called him to him and did command him to hold his Fauchion for him a little while Collinet having drawn it The Signior took it out of his hand and did put his foot upon the blade as if he would have broken it Whereupon Collinet cryed out Behold Gentlemen the great miracle which is done to my Sword I brought it hither without any Hilts or defend five guard at all and now see they have put the greatest
Asse unto it in the world Diverse Gentlemen at that cry did run thither which was the cause that the Gentleman who took the Sword from him did leave it with him and departed in a great confusion being resolved to assault him no more because his replyes were so sharp and poynant As we were speaking one day of a Woman who every day did inlarge her Husbands horns he made a thousand conceits upon it He said that she ought to be afraid lest he should gore her with the Arms of his Head when he was offended at her And as for himself he might have businesse enough to find Hats that would fit his Head and that he ought to make his doors higher to enter therein with ease and without stooping And but observe his subtilty he said that Astaeon had Horns not because he saw Diana naked but they came to that Cuckold because he had not the curiosity oftentimes to behold his own Wife naked He understood that a light Huswife had a Child for which no Father could be found You are to consider said he that she hath been in the Army and her Champions having all drawn in her defence she knows not in the scuffle who it was that gave her the blow He compared her also to one who had pricked his hand by touching thorns and could not tell in the whole bush which was the thorn did hurt him Having heard of another Girl who was great with Child and no Man could tell who was the Father of it You may be sure said he that she is Helena and she is great with child by Paris Hearing us to speak of nocturnal pollutions He said we were punished by the night for lying on our backs Clerantes running at the ring at the Royal Palace some who were present did say he did run with so much speed that he did leave the wind behind him That may be true enough if I may give the explication of it said Collinet Without all doubt my Masters Horse did break wind when he was running in the List Sometimes he would undertake to make verses as you know that Poetry and madnesse are near of kin He recited his Verses to a Gentleman who came often to Clerantes house and understanding that he was to marry he offered to make the Epithalamy The Gentleman meeting him not long afterwards said unto him Oh Master Collinet How doth your Muse you told me you would pipe something at my Wedding Pipe said he Upon my Faith you and I can both of us make one good instrument You shall provide the Horn and I the Pipe and of that you may make a Hornpipe The Gentleman who had hardly been married three days was very angry to hear himself so soon called Cuckold and was much abashed at it Not long before I made mention to you of Melibeus who loved gentle Diana He came often to Clerantes and although he would fain be in favour with me I could not endure him when I remembred how he traversd me in my first Loves which came often into my mind with an infinite number of other pleasing thoughts for you know the first impressions will never be forgotten I often spake to Collinet of him so that he did abuse him more than any other whereat Clerantes took great pleasure for Melibeus was accounted but a Buffon at the Court and he must speak to our Madman whether he would or no or otherwise he would have played upon him Their discourses were filled with Injuries and extravagant reproaches according to their several subjects It will be too difficult to give you an account of them in particular I shall only relate unto you the most lively and pleasing passage which happened between these two who were one of them almost as wise as the other Melibeus sitting one day at Clerantes Table they caused Collinet to sit by him that they might dispute together Collinet spake whatsoever he could to Melibeus to which Melibeus did answer very coldly being then in a more melancholy humour than ordinary Dinner being ended Collinet observing that he would give him no answer did quit the Company and retired himself into his own Chamber where all the day afterwards he was constrained to do Penance because he was not permitted to come down into the Hall as long as his Master was there present having not 2 days before come down into the Kitchin and beaten there a little Page whom his Master loved very dearly Melibeus being advised of it would call him to an account for some affronts which he had given him and thought now was the time to put his Revenge into execution he therefore coming up the stairs over the Hall where his Chamber was did pinch him on the arms and tweak'd him by the nose and did speak unto him such opprobrious words that he took a good Cudgel in his hand and began to charge him home with it Melibeus who had nothing to defend himself did conceive that his surest Course was to take his Farewell of the Chamber and to run away Therefore to testifie his speed he leaped down the Stairs three by three but Collinet pursued him and at every leap did overtake him with a sound blow either on his head or on his shoulders When he was almost at the Bottom of the stairs he made a little pause and with his hat in his hand making a most humble Reverence he said unto him Sir I do beseech you to excuse me that I doe not wayt upon you to the Foot of the Stairs because I am forbidden to passe any further otherwise you may assure your self I would expresse my self most diligent in my attendance on you Having spoke those words he returned into his Chamber and Melibeus did make as much hast down as before without the least regard unto the Complement of Collinet It grieved me not at all to see Melibeus so intreated and because he appeared to be in a good humor Collinet his Enemy being gone I desired him to repeat by heart those Complements which heretofore he had used to Diana He had not forgot one of them and because he would act them with the greater grace he caused Clerantes Page to sit down to personate the part of Diana and did court him in the very same Complements And if at any time he failed or extravagantly did proceed following the Caprichiousnesse of his own Fancy I did demonstrate to him how he ought to speak it and did act his part for him Melibeus did swell with despite to see how I did play upon him for his old Love but he durst not return a word because he observed it was agreeable to Clerantes At the last being able no more to endure our Scoffs he by little and little did withdraw himself from our Company and came no more unto us Behold how Collinet here had assisted me to take vengeance of a Man who to speak the truth had offended me in the most sensible part of my
given way that we should have fought by Torch-light he would never have made mention of it He made these Rodomantadoes out of a vain custom he had used ever since he had been a learner in the Fencing School and when he did expresse himself most highest his heart did always at that time beat most In effect he did speak only of the Duel because he was constrained to it and did indeavour to amuze me by his connterfeit resolution At the fast Montespin did cause us to lie in two beds which he had prepared for us and in the morning he did indeavour himself to make us friends alleging that it would redound to our dishonour if we should kill one another for nothing I had no desire that our difference should be so taken up so that I did leave Montespin and said unto Baiamond Let us goe then to look out him whom you wor of to put an end unto our controversie He followed me not knowing what I would say and I then propounded to him to return unto the place where yesterday we were and to fight our Duel there I charged my Enemy as violently as possibly I could and gave him so many blowes that he was hardly able to sustain them As I was striking one blow with all the force I had his horse curvetting received it upon his eyes which were immediatly covered with blood and did put him in such a rage that he would be governed no more by the Bridle or the Spur. His Master had enough to do to save himself with all the art and industry he had neverthelesse he carried him into a place full of dirt where I followed him so close that I might have killed him if I would but I had no desire to wound him in his back I cryed out unto him to return At the last he got so much power over his Horse that approaching to me he did give me a wound in my left Arm. Immediatly after he had hurt me his Horse did shake himself with such a sudden violence that he did throw him into a Ditch full of dirt where to be revenged of my wound I might have given him a hundred mortal ones if I had a desire thereunto I was contented to put the point of my sword to his throat and to assure him if he would not confesse that he owed his life unto me I would take it from him He who could not rise from the place where he was was constrained to submit unto me in all things and afterwards I did the best I could to assist him I told him if he had got such an advantage over me he would hardly have used me with that humanity and because I said you shall not impute your misfortune to the disadvantage that I was on Horseback and you on foot and that our quarrel may at this present be decided Let us begin if you please the Combat again because I observe that nothing but you cloathes have received any prejudice by your fall As I spoke those words Montespin who followed us close enough did presse in upon us and said No No you have given both of you sufficient proofs of your valour you must not proceed so far as to have your controversie determined by Death It is sufficient Francion what you have demonstrated and I am the Witnesse of it that it was in your power to have killed Baiamond Although the Count had confessed this himself necessity forcing him thereunto yet he was much perplexed to behold that Montespin was present who was as a judge of the fight and were it not for the incommodity he re-received that his cloaths were so full of Mudd that he was hardly able to stir in them I do believe he would have begun the fight again His Friend did lead him to a Village hard by where he caused him to disvest himself and for my self I returned to Paris to take care of my wound I declared what had befallen me to Clerantes who did publish it to the disadvantage of Baiamond and withall insisted much on the Justice of my Cause seeing the Count would have assaulted me by the greatest treachery in the world for a subject of no moment It was brought also to the ears of the King who very much reproved Batamond And there was not so much as Collinet our Fool who did not highly exclaim against him for the Injury he would have done me On the other side I was by every one extolled I do speak it without presumption and my courtesie was much commended which I exercised toward my Enemy in that I would not kill him when it was in my power to doe it and when the many indignities I received from him did provoke me to it It undoubtedly did manifest that I had a great command over my Soul that I would not suffer it to be misgoverned by the importunity and impetuousnesse of my Choler By this occasion I procured to my self the favour of Protogenes who was one of the bravest Princes in Europe There was nothing in me which he esteemed not He much approved my discourse and the reasons I did give for whatsoever I did speak and gave me liberty to expresse my self freely before him whether the subject were good or evil knowing well enough that I would not reproach any one but those only who did well deserve it One time I published a Satyr which I had made against a certain Lord of whose degree I made no mention nor of his name There was at the same time another Lord in the Court who believed the Satyr was made on himself and complained of it to Protogenes who with smiles told me what he had heard to be reported I made answer to him My Lord It is easie to conclude that he who made this complaint unto you is extremly vicious for were he not he would never imagin that these lashing verses did strike at him When I made the Satyre I knew not if there were such a man in the world or not and yet because he hath all the Vices of other men I have not whipped that Vice which is not in his Soul Behold the Subject of his affliction he should have been more carefull of his honour and not of himself made the world to understand what is the life which he doth lead at the Court But grant that I had composed the Satyre on himself if he were a wise man he would not make the least appearance to be moved at all I remember that another Lord of the Court not long since did cause a poor Poet to be beaten for having defamed him in his verses But what think you was the Event of it It reflected worse on my Lord than it did before for although the poor Rimer received blowes on his back in as vast measure and cadence as were the verses which he made yet the people were unsatisfied until they knew what was the offence he had committed the occasion being known and divulged
honest man you shall presently be so we doe all proceed from Generation and propagation although we look as old as Cato himself You begin to be uncivil Sir she replyed who would have thought you would have these words Will you contest then will you be obdurate to me said he Speaking those words he would have taken hold of her to put his design in execution but she cryed out so loud that I was enforced to come down from my Chamber to hasten to her relief She demanded of me if I had sent for her to be used as one of the most debauched Women in the world I suddenly appeased her having told her what a distracted man Signior Collinet was But my dear heart said Raymond unto Francion Take you no care for she will not be so cruel to your Indearments and the Loves you shall make unto her no more will any of her Companions we shall find them to be of a flowing disposition Let me alone to give you content I will recompense you a hundred fold for the silver which heretofore I did take from you Francion having thanked him for his courtesie did goe to Collinet and said unto him that he did esteem more highly of him than of those men who conceiving themselves to be wise did glorifie themselves and yet had more vanity and folly in their Spirits than he had in his For that said he which is ordinarily taken for the greatest wisedom in the world is nothing else but folly error and defect of Judgement as I can make it to appear if it were needfull And we ourselves who sometimes do believe that we do wel to imploy our time in Love and Feasts and Mummeries shall find at last that we doe but deceive our selves and that we are but very Fools Sicknesse will afflict us the debility of our Members will surprize us before we can arrive to fifty years of age Leave off that Discourse let me beseech you said Raymond I am not now in the humor to give ear unto these Preachments neither do I well know if you are in the humor to make them Having spoken these words he departed from him to entertain a gallant number of Gentlemen and Burgesses who lived thereabouts whom he had invited unto Dinner with some brave Ladies who were a little more chast than those that were there already who came down into the Hall most richly attired and Francion having whispered and demanded of them Which of them it was who had shewed her Buttocks did mark them all very curiously to see which of them did blush that he might discover her by it but there was not one of them who had a Countenance more shamefac'd than another neither did they give any answer at all for she of whom he did speak intreated her Companions not to discover her so that for the present it was concealed from him Not long afterwards there was covered a long Table which immediatly was charged with such a diversity of Victuals that it seemed they had taken almost all the Creatures of the Earth to devour them at one Dinner When they had satisfied their greatest hunger Raymond told every one of them that He must observe the Laws which were inscribed on the portal of the Door to chase from them all shame and resolve to make the greatest Debauchment that was ever heard of Immediatly all the Casements of the windows were shut and the Curtains being drawn Candles were lighted for they would not have taken so much pleasure in that Course of life if they had seen the day Every one sung his Song with a glasse in his hand and they told so many merry Stories that they would make a Volume by themselves if they were all particularly related The Women having lost their shame did rehearse also the most wanton tales that possibly they could remember A Gentleman upon some Discourse told them That he would recite unto them one of the most notable stories in the world and thus began There was a Curate in our Village who loved as well the Company of a Woman as of his Prayer-book I beseech you Sir said Raymond that you will forbear to repeat it We must not speak of those People although they do offend It belongs to their Bishop and not to us to reprove them If you detract them you are to be excommunicated and to be numbred amongst the Libertins of this Age against whom so much Warr is waged Be not so rash as to fall on that Subject The Gentleman held his peace and all the Company having approved his opinion not to speak against those of whom already so much hath been said that no more can be added they determined with themselves not so much as to think that there was a Priest living in the world They found that there were enough of other Conditions of Men to be condemned from whom the depravations of this Age did receive their Original It is true that in the beginning of Heresies all the World made the people of the Church the subject of their Discourse There was no Account conceived to be witty that had not a Priest in it Erasmus Rablais the Queen of Navarr Marot and divers others delighted themselves in this Conceit and before them many Italians Neverthelesse we must avow That all this hath not the power to divert a religious Soul from the Path-way of Faith and at that time when it was shewed us that our Priests were very wicked it was not to conclude that our Religion was evil So Boccace who in his Novels did shew himself to be the Master of an excellent spirit doth tacitly accuse all those who speak of the People of the Church which but few Men do take notice of He informs us that a Jew at Rome having observed the wicked life of the Priests and Monks did not for all that forbear to make himself a Christian affirming That he plainly perceived that our Religion was the best because it subsisted and every day did fortifie it self in spite of the exorbitances of the Church-men and necessarily it must be That God had a particular Care of the Church Raymond had these considerations and moreover he alleged That weak spirits do believe all which they apprehend without diving into the depth of Causes and that to avoid Scandal it is alwayes Good not to meddle at all with the Dispencers of holy things I have been my self of the same Opinion and you shall observe that in all this History I do not so much as touch on the Priests at all The Gentlemans story being thus interrupted they discoursed afterwards on several other Subjects A certain Lord who sate near to Francion did shew him Agatha who was placed at the upper end of all the Table and whispering him in the ear did say unto him Sir Know you not the reason wherefore Raymond hath in that place seated that old Woman who seems to be rather a piece of some old Cabanet than a
since without just Cause thou so maliciously dost desire that I should depart out of this world Heaven the more to enrage and punish thee will permit that I shall continue here a long time Then they all three fell upon me and being unwilling to believe that I was alive because they desired I were dead they did their best indeavour to shrowd me and bury me in this Linnen sheet I made resistance as long as possibly I could crying out Help Help Murder Murder and telling them that I was not dead I do believe they had a desire to have strangled me and no doubt they had put it in Execution if out of your goodnesse you had not come to my succour being as I believe invited to it by my Cries Now Sir I do beseech you that you will vouchsafe to assist me having understood the Justice of my Cause Procure that they persecute me no more as they did before your Comming and be pleased to be a Protector of the miserable When he had thus ended his Speech Francion who understood the Justice of his cause desired to make peace amongst them and the young Ruffian and the old woman who accompanied him departed fearing they should be apprehended The woman of the house perceiving that the Gentleman desired to dine there did goe down into the Kitchin confused and ashamed to make preparations for his Dinner All that time her Husband was putting on his Cloathes and kept close to Francion with whom he discoursed on diverse Subjects After dinner Francion caused his wife to appear and said unto them both that they must both of them before him make a long and a durable friendship The Husband who desired nothing but Love and Honesty did easily consent unto it and the Wife did the same being constrayned by necessity I will then said Francion that Robin immediatly doe shew me if he be not sufficiently valiant of himself to give his wife content without making her to run to the Court for help Fair Ladies you that without blushing cannot endure to hear those things spoken of which best of all you do love I know well enough that if you cast your eyes on this passage and on many other places of this Book you will presently lay it by and peradventure will hate me or at least will so dissemble to doe to shew your selves chast and retired Neverthelesse I love the truth so much that for all the coynesse of your humour I will conceal nothing especially of that which doth profit more by being divulged than by having it buried in silence Robin after some unwillingnesse did accord to the desire of Francion being very glad to have the eyes of so great a personage to be the unreproachable Witnesses of the proofs of his valour but his Wife seemed to be much ashamed and affirmed that she had rather die than endure that such a thing should be seen before the eyes of the world And why so said Francion Doe not all men know that which you two doe being both together Doe you desire to conceal it To what purpose will that serve you When I have seen you to have done it were I the greatest babler in the world all that I could say would be but that I have seen you to have done it And what news would that be I may say as much now for it is but the Truth Moreover doe you think I am not as able to judge of this businesse as well as the Chirurgians and that I cannot make as true a judgement as they whereby you shall not be troubled to run to the Spiritual Court where it will cost you as much mony as attendance For all these reasons the Hostesse remained in her first obstinate Resolution and Francion pursuing his intentions told her that if she would not doe it he would command all his servants to hold her by her Arms until Robin had accomplished his Desire And without any more adoe he took her himself and threw her on the Bed and commanded Robin to begin what he had to doe who after that the Cavallier had commanded his servants to depart and stayed alone himself in the Chamber did shew himself ready to obey him But it is said that whenever his Servants were gone Francion caused him to wave the incounter for he would first see if he were well provided with all things that were necessary for him Moreover the Detractors doe affirm that he made them afterwards to begin the fight again and did furnish them with new precepts of Love you may believe which you please It may suffice to understand that he judged they had no cause to be discontented at one another without making any mention unto you either of erection or intromission or ejaculation which are words that rellish more of the Court of the Church than of the Court at the Louvre The Hostesse had a Sister to marry and some there were that did goe singing up and down the village That she must take a Husband upon proof because that her Sister was deceived But no great heed ought to be taken to that slander Behold this is all that we have to speak like a Libertine in this Book Are you ashamed to look upon it Gentlemen and Ladies who are the Readers The stories which are here to be read are not so guilty that they were made on purpose to prompt you unto Vice Our design is to make you expressely to hate it by setting before your eyes the bad successe of enormous enterprises Whatsoever it be it may easily be discerned that it was not made for the meditation of religious Votaresses but to instruct those how to live that are in the world where every day they are inforced to understand many other things of this Nature for what offences be there that are not dayly brought to the knowledge of the Courts of Justice and how can it be remedied but that they will administer a Subject of discourse in all Companies But if my excuses are of no validity and you can find nothing in this Book to please you Readers whosoever you are doe not read it the second time I did not make it for yours but for my own particular pleasure Doe not buy it if you have no mind to it there is no man will inforce you to it But if you have it and that altogether it doth displease you cast it into the fire and if there be but one part only which is disagreeable to you either tear it or blot it out and make your profit of the rest But if some words only be against your heart I give you the fair liberty to insert others which you shall better approve I believe there are very few Authors who will say as much and lesse that will grant it but they are all too stubborn and doe tye themselves to impertinent vanities For my part I will take my own Swing and delight my self without reflecting on any other Do you afterwards if
and reserved only one with him who was the Gentleman of his Chamber in the mean time he did lie down upon the grasse and contemplated on the Picture of Nays Some will say that following the Imaginations of Poets he made this Complaint which indeed is not much unlike to their ayr in the Romances Ah dearest Picture How many Miracles dost thou contain And in how little a room How can it be that the mixture of so few colours can have such wonderfull attractions Alas thou art nothing else but a Resemblance and yet thou causest in me a real passion I take delight indeed to touch thee and to kisse thee and I must confesse I touch nothing but Wood and yet the sight of thee doth cause in me unparalleld transportations What would become of me if I might be one day so happy as to have her in my Arms whose beauties thou representest the excesse of Love and Joy would be so great that I should lose at least my life since that but looking on thee I have already lost my liberty But fair Nays I would I were now dying so that I were but near unto your person There was a Gentleman of that Country in the same Forest who understood his complaints being hid behind a tree near unto him and being desirous to know who he was did approach unto him from his place of concealment and demanded of him Whose Picture he had in his hands to which he made such sad complaints Sir replyed Francion I am sorry that you have heard what I have said for if you have never proved the force of Love You will conceive it to be the most egregious folly in the World The other making answer that he was too well acquainted with the violence which that passion doth exercise upon humane Spirits desired to see the picture of Nays and knew so well to dive into the heart of Francion that he got the truth out of it and understood the whole design of his journey to see Nays and said unto him Be of a glad heart she is already arrived at the place to which you are addressing your self I doe protest unto you I have seen her and doe believe her to be the most beautifull Lady in the world Francion enquired further of the Gentleman what train she had he made answer she hath such a train as a person of her quality ought to have she hath moreover in her company a young Signior called Valerius who in my opinion is as much devoted to her service as your self They pretend both to be sick and to take for the present those waters for their recovery but I doe believe they doe not drink the waters which are brought unto them but doe privatly throw them away for that is not the water which is expedient for them you say true said Francion For Nays needs no other water than to drink of the River of the Paradise of Love which I will give unto her if she pleaseth and as for Valerius he must needs take full draughts of the water of the River of Forgetfulnesse to cause him to lose the remembrance of that incomparable beauty which doth not shine for the improvement of his fortunes but will procure his death if always he will adventure to approach it as he hath done heretofore Having had some other discourses on this Subject Francion did thank the Gentleman for the intelligence he had given him and departed to the Inn where Dinner stayed for him and after that he gave himself no rest until he came to the Village where the fountain was to which so many sick men did addresse themselves When he came thither in the closing of the evening he understood that Nays was there with Valerius accordingly as he was informed He enquired for the house where she lodged and passed by it in a good equipage as she did stand at the window to take the fresh air He there beheld the beauty which seemed to him more wonderfull than that of her picture for he observed there many excellent lineaments which the Painter had forgotten Nays perceiving him was as sollicitous to enquire who he was for she had never seen any Signior who in such a journey had people to attend him so richly habited Those that stood near unto her being ignorant of him she was constrained to send one of her menial Servants to inform her self who he was and what was his name He addressed himself to one of his Lackeys who as all the rest of them was commanded to say that his name was Floriander for Francion contrary to his first intention was determined through all hazards to follow the Counsel of Dorini by that pretence first of all to make tryal of his fortune At the name of Floriander the heart of Nays did leap for joy conceiving that he for whom she fetched so many sighs was arrived in that Country according to her desires She could not as he passed by observe Francion so precisely to know whether or not he was like to that picture of Floriander which she had She now did burn with a desire to see him and knew not what to doe to make her self so happy The worst of all was as she thought that Dorcini was not with her It did much afflict her that she had not any whom she thought capable to be imployed in this great affair and she knew not how to manage it her self because she was a stranger and did not well understand the customs of France Neverthelesse at the last she resolved to accomplish her desires and her Lover having so far prevailed according to the ordinary custom to give her a visit she did lead Valerius in a ring and did believe that although he had taken the pains to wait upon her yet she might use the liberty allowed to women and freely give that place to another which he hoped to enjoy in her affections As she was in these apprehensions a Post brought her a Letter which she unsealed and found that it came from Dorini Madam said the Post Before she had the leisure to peruse it wonder not that a Letter is sent unto you here from Italy which came from France for I was informed that there was something in it which did much concern you and that I must make no delay but bring it to you with all the speed that possibly I could fearing you were not advertised that you are more near to Dorini here than in your own Country When he had spoken those words she did let her eye fall on the Letter where she did read that her dear Lover was dead It undoubtedly must needs be that the faculties of her Soul were of an admirable temper that at the suddenesse of this unexpected and most melancholy news she did not seem to change her complexion or to swoun away That which at that instant much conduced to make her passe away her affliction was that a second Messenger belonging to Francion did
Servant being obliged to him did promise him to perform whatsoever was in the compass of his power and according to his directions he did repair to Valerius and told him That Nays was overcome with the pains he had taken to wait upon her and desired nothing more than to delight her self in his Company but she could not entertain him as she would because she had two other Lovers who were so importunate with her and especially the Frenchman whom they ought to stand in fear of because as yet they were upon the Lands of his Country where he had both Friends and Power Notwithstanding she was resolved to grant him some hours of Entertainment and desired him to come in the dusk of the Evening in a habit like to that of her own Servants Having acquainted Valerius with this he addressed himself to Ergastus to give him the same Invitation so that they both apparelled themselves accordingly as they were prescribed believing that it was highly necessary to keep them from being discovered Valerius came first to Nays House and as he was knocking at the door Ergastus arrived who taking Valerius for one of the Ladies Servants demanded of him if his Mistresse were in Bed or not Valerius answered something stubbornly That he could not tell Ergastus could not endure his arrogance and being transported into choler did give him some injurious language whereupon they fell to blows with their fists In this Commotion one came to the Gate with a Candle by the light whereof knowing one another they were two of the most amazed Creatures in the world and being confounded with shame they returned by severall ways to their own lodgings Meeting again on the next morning they had the curiosity to demand of one another wherefore they were so disguised And because they could not conceal that they were infinitely amorous of Naeys and did whatsoever lay in their power to procure her good will they accounted one unto the other the message they received and perceived that there was some one who had a design upon them They did send to seek out the Groom who did bring the message to them and conjured him to tell them for what cause he had delivered to them both the same errand Seeing they could draw from him no other answers but what carryed no probability of truth with it they promised him a great recompense so that being tempted partly with that and partly with the love which he did bear to those of his own Country he declared to them that he had done nothing but by the Counsell of Francion At these tydings they were resolved to be revenged and as soon as an occasion should offer it self to pay the Frenchman in his own metal Hereupon they did shake hands and became entire friends to have the better opportunity to hurt their common and dangerous Enemy and propounded to themselves not to prosecute their loves until they could be acquitted of his Company Nays understanding the ill will they did bear unto him whom she loved and fearing that some mischief might ensue would not look upon him with the least favour and did forbear to speak unto him but when necessity did oblige her to it This much perplexed Francion who propounding to himself that she disdained him it caused him to send many Letters of Love unto her by her Servants who at the last assured him that their Mistresse did charge them to acquaint him that she desired not that he should send any more such letters to her One day as privately as he could he accosted a female servant of Nays who did wish him well and conjured her by all manner of Imprecations to acquaint him with the cause of her Ladies displeasure She consented to discover it unto him provided that he would promise to keep it secret He having made all the protestations that she could desire she informed him that her Lady suspecting the dangerous enterprise of his Rivalls would not make manifest the affection which she did bear unto him until she was got forth from those unknown places and saw him in her own lands where she could interpose her authority whatsoever accident might befall This gratefull news did bring him as great contentment as he possibly could imagin and for his consolation he began to nourish in his Soul a great hope at the policy of his Mistresse who would make him to languish a little in despair to render afterwards her favours the more precious When they were come into Italy Valerius and Ergastus thought they should easily find the means to intrap him as indeed they well might doe They did prosecute him with extraordinary respect and did not speak unto him but in the most civil Complements of the world If his Spirit were not at that time entirely possessed with the agonies of Love which caused him to think on nothing else he might well conceive that this extraordinary entertainment of his Rivals proceeded only out of a desire which they had to draw him into their ambuscadoes Being therefore become a stranger to his accustomed prudence he took no care of them and fondly believed that they did bear unto him no lesse good will in their hearts than they expressed by their words To recreate himself he was seen altogether in their company because he durst not speak unto Nays and he did goe to seek them out himself in the places where they lodged One morning he did meet them just before the Gate of the house where Nays was lodged where he beheld a Gentleman with great joy to salute Ergastus as if he had not seen him a long time before afterwards he whispered some words in his ear to which Ergastus only answered by the shaking of his head Gentlemen said Ergastus turning himself afterwards to Valerius and Francion Behold here a fair occasion which offers it self to content your curiosities The Master of this Gentleman is Governour of a strong Castle two leagues from this place he hath heard of my arrival and hath sent unto me to invite me with my company to his Castle you shall goe along with me if you please according to his desire Valerius made answer that he had never the happinesse to know that Signior and therefore he could not believe that he desired his Company and for his own part he was not so ill advised as to be importunate with any man to be obliged to him for a courtesie Francion with greater reason made an answer much to the same sense But Ergastus seeming discontented thereat did say unto them Lose not the opportunity you have to behold many excellent things There are great rarities in this place to which you are invited to goe There are the true Bones of a man of a prodigious greatnesse There are to be seen all sorts of Arms and antient medals The most exquisite things in all the world are there in one abridgement to be seen Goe along with me I beseech you for I have no desire to
goe thither without you I am unwilling to lose the good opinion of my friend who may be angry with me for having failed to bring those persons to him whose Merit he infinitely doth esteem Francion who was not of the jealous humour of that Country did believe the words of Ergaesius and that there were many rarities in that place to which he would conduct him and seeing that at the last Valerius did consent to goe along with him he was willing to be their Companion without conceiving that all this was but a plot laid before hand to take away his life He was on Horseback as well as the rest and had his Gentleman to attend him whom he would have had to have followed him with all his train but Ergastus said unto him that he must not be allowed to take any one with him for they could not be permitted with any great company to enter into the Castle I take none of my people with me said Ergastus no more doth Valerius it is requisite that we doe leave them all behind us at Nays Court After dinner we shall easily overtake them We will have none to goe along with us but only a Groom of the Marchionesses whom I doe esteem above all the rest Having expressed these words he caused the Gentleman of whom he spake to come unto him who was the same person that heretofore was so much affectioned to the service of Francion In a short time they arrived at the Castle where they were honourably received by him who was the Captain Francion observing that they held one another in entertainments which prolonged the time was extremely sorry for he burned with impatience to behold the marvails that were related to him He softly acquainted Valerius with it who moved the Company concerning that Subject The Captain who had the watch-word given him no sooner heard of it but immediatly he took a great bunch of keys and having led them a long way he caused them to enter into a strong Tower where he said the greatest rarities of that place were locked up He shewed them a great round chair very ancient which had truckles under it to move withall He assured them that on whatsoever hour one should sit down in it he should hear a certain harmonious noise which came as is thought from under the ground but the cause thereof could never be found It was therefore imputed to some Spirits who inhabite the place Ergastus laughed at it and said it was a phantastical imagination and that he could give no faith to a thing so extraordinary all that stood by were of the same opinion with himself Make tryal of it said the Captain and you shall understand the Truth they then begun one after another to sit down in the chair and rising in a wonder they affirmed that they heard the sweetest Musick in the World Francion who stayed last of all and did laugh at the ridiculous affirmation of his Companions did to comply with them sit down himself And the Captain standing neer unto him did in an instant turn a little cord whereupon the springs flying open that held fast the chair it did run down with him that was in it into a deep Cave where he continued for a certain time so amazed that he stirred not either hand or foot Ergastus and Valerius seeing him so well surprized did thank the Captain for the good assistance he had given them and entreated him to continue it by putting his prisoner to death when he should see convenient From thence they departed toward Nays whom they found in a little Town at dinner She enquired of them what was become of Francion because it was told her that he was not in that place where all his people were lodged Her Groom of whom we have spoken did approach unto her and said Madam He is privately returned to France and meeting with me accidentally before his departure he did give me a charge to acquaint you that in whatsoever place he should be he would always assume the quality of your servant And Madam Doe not wonder that he is gone without his train It is because he would not make apparent the desire which he hath to depart from you fearing that if any longer he should stay it would redound to the prejudice of his affairs And there is a great apparence that it is so for he hath commanded me to charge his people to return all of them into France and without making any noise to overtake him in the way Having told this lie to Nays he repaired to the Gentleman who waited upon Francion in his Chamber and caused him to depart with all the other Servants to overtake their Master Nays had all the afflictions in the world for the sudden removal of him whom so intirely she affected Oh How often did she repent that she had been of late so averse unto him for she believed that she was the cause of his departure Accursed men said she speaking of Valerius and Ergastus If you had not persecuted me with your importunities I had not been constrained to use him so cruelly whose least action doth merit infinite favours May you be punished with the Evil which you have caused me to suffer Never hope that I will look upon you with a pleasing countenance again I will for the time to come be more cruel to you than ever yet I have been or peradventure you doe believe that I can be And as she said so accordingly she did deport her self but had she known the treason of those two Signiors she would undoubtedly have been inforced to have used them more cruelly At the last she arrived at her own house where more and more she did testifie her indignation and commanded her unfaithfull Groom to seek out Francion in all places and to give him a Letter from her in which she did demonstrate for what occasion she did not give him that respect which his Vertues did deserve and covertly did intreat him to come to that place where heretofore he had a great desire to arrive This Post did depart to put his charge in execution and took his way towards France in which he knew well enough that he should not find Francion Having travailed not far he returned and before he saw his Mistresse he passed by the House where Ergastus lodged of whom he demanded what expedient he should use in that affair Ergastus believing that Nays had never seen any thing written by Francion's own hand did cause a Letter to be written as if it came drectly from him in which amongst other things he did represent unto her that the pleasures in France had caused him to forget the delights of Italy and that she must never expect to see him again seeing there was nothing that could call him back into Italy Nays having received that Letter did call Francion a thousand times ungratefull and uncivil to write such a Letter to her But being out of the
draw your teeth Gentlemen without putting you to any pain at all and to put others in their places with which you may eat as well as with teeth naturally your own And with what dost thou pluck them out With the point of a Sword No Gentlemen That way is too old It it with this which I hold in my hand And what is it which thou holdest in thy hand Signior of Italy My horses bridle Gentlemen This Tooth-drawer had no sooner begun this goodly Oration but a Porter a Lacky a Woman that cryed Cherries three that cryed Mackarel two Apprentices a Ragg-man and a seller of Almanacks did all stand still to hear him For my self pretending as though I looked upon some of those old Books which the Booksellers do there commonly lay forth upon their Stalls I did listen to him as well as the rest Having so many venerable Auditors he re-inforced his eloquence and did continue in these words Who is he that draws out the teeth of Kings and Princes Is it the Carmelite Or the English man in the yellow Ruff Is it Master Arnault who to make the world believe that he is a Tooth drawer for Potentates hath painted about his own Picture the Pope and all the Consistory of Cardinals every one of them with a black plaister above his temple representing thereby that none of them are exempted from the Tooth ache No No It is not he Who is it then that draweth out the teeth of those great Princes It is the Italian Gentleman whom you see It is my self Gentlemen It is I. I it is who am the Man He did speak that shewing himself in a full body to them all and laying his hand upon his Brest Many other fopperies he represented and asked all the questions of himself and undertook to deliver himself in pure Italian when he was by his birth no other than a Norman To hear him speak it you could but believe him as well as hear him there is not any one who would have a tooth any longer in his head He presented a Beggar to them from whom he had taken six teeth he had put them in but a little before and holding something in his mouth which was moist and of a red complexion he seemed alwayes to be spitting of bloud Gentlemen said the Mountebank I cure the Souldiers for courtesie the Poor for the honour of God and the rich Merchants for money You may see what it is to have a tooth vitiated rotten or corrupted You will go to a Senator to recommend your Sute unto him you begin to open your Cause he turns aside from you and cryes out Oh the putrefaction Withdraw my Friend your breath is very noysome he will not endure to come near to hear you and so your Cause is lost But you will say unto me Have you any Remedy for it Yes Gentlemen I have and for many other Inconveniences I have a Pommada to make fair the skin It is white as Snow and odoriferous as Balm or Musk. See here my Boxes This great one will cost you eight Souses the little one with the writing five I have an excellent Oyntment for all wounds If any one be hurt I can cure him I am neither Physician Doctor nor Philosopher but my Oyntment is as soveraign and can do as much as all the Philosophers Doctors and Physicians in the world Experience is better than bare knowledge and the Practick than the Theory Whiles the Mountebank did thus extoll his own Art many honest people gathered about him and amongst others Hortensius whom I well observed I immediatly entertained an Invention to make him the Ladder on which my mirth should climb I stayed there not long after for the Tooth-drawer was constrained to retire There came another Mountebank on horseback who laughed him to scorn and did strike at him with the flat of his Sword Since they were both so cunning and so prompt in the drawing of Teeth I knew not why in a revengefull emulation they might not draw one another off their Horses I hoped they would have done it but our Italian fled and would appear no more giving place unto the other One Morning I repaired to him with Escluses and said unto him Sir there is a Kinsman of ours who is much troubled with the pain of his Teeth we have advised him to have them drawn but he is so extremely fearfull that we cannot prevail upon him to resolve upon it He saith that you will put him to torment although that very lately he hath seen you to take our many Teeth without any pain at all a little beneath the Bridge Alas Sir said the Mountebanck I will not put him to any pain If you please that I shall presently take out one of your Teeth you shall perceive how swift and easie is my hand No said I I will believe you rather But our Kinsman is afraid that having no teeth he cannot chew his meat for the time to come nor pronounce his words so pleasingly as now he doth If you provide for that inconvenience by artificial teeth you will do him a greater pleasure than he is yet sensible of in delivering him from so great a torment I know the man very well and he would with all his heart that it were done therefore we do desire you to go to him and whether he will or no to take out those teeth that are so painfull to him You are so excellent at it that when he but opens his mouth to speak unto you you may draw them out and he never so much as think of what you are doing That being done he will pay you very thankfully if not we will see you satisfied our selves The Mountebanck believing our words we acquainted him with the house in which Hortensius lodged and the Mountebanck foreseeing the difficulties that might ensue did take with him two Voluntiers to accompany him and if need were to aid him in his enterprise Hortensius who would take any pains for a livelyhood had with him four Scholars who were Pensioners and were then going to the College of Bon Court He caused them to repeat their Lesson when these people entred in Sir said the Mountebanck your Kinsmen have told me that you have teeth which do put you to great torment Is it your pleasure that I should draw them Who I said Hortensius I have better teeth Sirrah than thy self thou mistakest me for another No said the Mountebanck It was told me that you would conceal the pain you endure that I might not draw them out but I am commanded to ease you for ever of that torment I must perform it Boys hold him fast and open his mouth as wide as you can I will put you Sir to such little pain that you shall not feel it at all The two Voluntiers whom he brought along with him did begin to take him by the arms according to their instructions but he did beat them back and did strike
This is my Invention you shall find these words printed in the beginning of the second leaf in great Letters TO THE GRANDIES as if it were the addresse of a Dedicatory and under it shall follow this Epistle It is not to dedicate this Book to you that I make this Epistle but it is that you may understand that I do not dedicate it unto you You will peradventure object It is no such great Present and but a Packet only of idle and foolish actions which I have as idly observed and collected but you will say Why do you not give unto us an account of virtuous Deeds Why shall I not have the liberty to speak of those things which great men dare do I have too free a Spirit to conceal the Truth and if I had the leisure I had inlarged this Volume with the lives of infinite persons who do seem to challenge place in my History by their continual enormities But if those of whom in my Satyrical entertainments I have already made mention doe not consider that I appear first of all in the rank and are not contented to speak unto me because I have spoke of them Do you know what they will gain to find themselves offended T is this They will discover to all the world that it is of them whom I do speak which was not known before and moreover they will procure that for the time to come 〈◊〉 shall not feign to name them because they have begun to do it themselves Do you conceive that a man of such a temper doth perplex himself about the Dedication of Books and that I who can adore no perfections but what are divine ought to humble my self before multitudes who are obliged to give thanks to Fortune that she hath granted them riches to cover their defects You are to understand that I look not on the world but as a Comedy and esteem of men no more but only as they do act well the part which is given to them He who is a Peasant and liveth according to the Rules of honesty in that condition doth seem to me more commendable than he who is born a Gentleman and performeth not the actions of a Gentleman So that prizing every one according as he is and not according to that which he hath I do equally esteem those who have the charge of the greatest affairs with those who have only but a charge of raggs upon their baggs if Virtue doth not make the difference Neverthelesse I have not so little a consideration to the truth but that I do believe there may be found a Generation as illustrious for their Merit as their Birth and Fortunes and that this age is not so barbarous but that there are some of you who love honourable actions let but those who are of the number cause themselves to be known better than heretofore and I promise them that then I will not only dedicate Books unto them but shall be ready to live and dye in their service This is the Epistle which I have addressed to the Grandies which is for all that not an Epistle or at least is not dedicative but it is rather a negative Epistle Raymond replyed It is bold and gallant and no man can be offended at it for it is not to men of Virtue to whom you speak they are exempted but when will it be that in earnest you will set your self in work about it I hope said Francion that within a few days I shall put Pen to Paper to write my last work but I will not publish it no more than I will the entire History in which I will labour when I shall attain unto the Haven whereof I do desire to arrive For my self I do not affect to torment my spâ—rits I doe not write but only to divert my self and before I do take my Pen into my hand I do take my Lute from the Case and after I have wrote a leaf I do walk and play which is to me as the respite of Musick betwixt the acts of a Comedy Observe what are the pains which I take I bite not my Nails in meditation of what I am to write Would it be fit do you think to make posterity partake in things no better studied I should have repented to have been elaborate for I desire that none but my familiar Friends may peruse those works which I shall compose It will be some comfort to me said Raymond that I am one of that number and also I do perswade my self that your History being finished you will not forget me My brave friend said Francion upon my faith you speak too seriously concerning that which is nothing worth I will not leave you in this error you must understand I am no such great Scholar as since our first acquaintance in France I have made you for pleasure to believe There is more of me in apparence than in effect I have by heart some pieces of my friends of which I debate oftentimes with my self and when I have presented any thing to personages of Honour I in the like manner do assist my self with the labours of other men or do add something to it of my self which is of no value How can it be that so poor a Cavallier as my self should have learned so much It is for those to be learned who are Gentlemen of that profession and have slept upon Parnassus Hill See here a pleasing Dissimulation Do you think said Raymond to excuse your self from shewing me your works Because you will have it so replyed Francion I will shew unto you all that which I have composed although it be not worthy of your eye It was well known that Francion had not so narrow a capacity In a short time he was able to accomplish whatsoever he undertook but it was true that this was the season in which he had rather give a Subiect to others to write upon than to write himself He was now busie on other thoughts and seeing that Hortensius who was always the same man was indued with an incomparable presumption he determined to put some pleasant design in practice to make himself merry with him He communicated this design to Raymond Du Buisson and Audebert without whom he could do nothing at all and the more to advance the plot he made partakers of it four Alman Gentlemen with whom he was acquainted Men of a gallant Conversation and whom Hortensius as yet had never seen One day as he was with him Audebert entred into the Chamber and said There are lately some Polonians come to Rome Know you not what businesse they have to do It is said that their King is dead but I have not yet heard who is he whom they have chosen to succeed him It must be some Prince of Italy who is now in this City All who were present said it was the first news they had heard of it and discoursing with themselves who should be King of Polonia One named one
extraordinary importance when he was approached Francion told him that Bergamin was one of the most delightfull Companions in the world and that he would make him to believe that he had promised marriage to Emilia Raymond who had heard some Discourse concerning that Lady did begin to give ear to what was spoken but Bergamin redoubling his assurances did speak in this manner I am glad that you have called hither a witnesse for you shall both perceive that I speak nothing but what is to the purpose and most credible Take heed Francion that you are not deceived your self I protest unto you that Emilia hath assured me that you have promised to marry her upon the faith of a Gentlemen and that you ought not to conclude any thing with Nays to the prejudice of your Word and Honour Her Mother hath requested me to come unto you and to advise you not to be so disloyal as to proceed further in that marriage To this Bergamin did joyn a long Discourse against the unfaithfullnesse of Lovers where he shewed the excellence of his memory in reciting several Authors which he had read and he made apparent also the vivacity of his Spirit in appropriating several choice things of his own invention Sometimes he incouraged himself and gave more grace unto his words by the gesture of an Orator and kept his Countenance so well that he seemed to be as excellent an Orator as he was a Comedian Francion knew not well how he should deport himself whether he should laugh or whether he should be angry Neverthelesse he said unto Bergamin that by how much the better he did speak by so much he did testifie that he knew the better how to dissemble Bergamin made answer that in truth Francion had seen some mimick fictions proceed from him but they were appropriated to such persons as deserved to be abused and not to Francion who ought to be intreated in another manner and that he was resolved to speak no more unto him for suddenly he would hear of other assurances which would be more forcible than any which he had spoken of as yet Speaking those words he departed in a great passion to observe that because heretofore he was accustomed to prevaricate with Fables they did now believe that he neither was or ever could be able to speak one word of Truth By this manner of his abrupt departure it was collected That what he did speak was in earnest for had it been in jeast he would have at last turned into laughter all that he had said knowing well enough that he had not novices to deal with When he was departed Raymond said to Francion I am consident that your Conscience is clear of the Crime which is imposed on you Yes replyed Francion I dare assure you that there is no such thing and howsoever it be carried it must needs be some scandalous invention but it moves not me at all for I am above all these assaults They had some other Discourse on this subject and afterwards they parted to go to their repose The next morning Francion would wait upon Nays to give her a good morrow but thinking to enter into her House with that liberty which he thought did belong unto him one of the Servants came to acquaint him that Nays was not yet ready He stayed therefore some time below of his own accord but believed whatsoever the Customs of the Italians were that he might be permitted to come unto her if she were but half ready considering the Condition in which he was and having a little time continued in this Patience he attempted to go up the Stairs again but it was told him That on that day Nays was not disposed to see any one Francion replyed I believe you do not know me honest Friend or at least you pretend that you do not know me If Nays should give order that no Man should have accesse unto her I believe I ought to be excepted Tell her therefore It is I who am here and ask her If she cannot make a distinction betwixt me and others The Messenger made hast to perform the Command and there came one of her Pages from her to acquaint him from his Mistresse That on that day she would neither speak with him nor any one else but for the dayes following it might be she would admit some others to speak unto her but not himself Francion was so moved to understand this answer that he could willingly with his Cane have corrected the young Man for his sawcinesse were it not for the respect which he did bear to the Livery and the Colours of his Mistress At the first he perswaded himself that this Answer proceeded from the Invention of this malicious Servant but afterwards he concluded that he would never have been so unadvised as to bring such an answer to him if he had not received a Commandment expresly for it Believing therefore that this Answer came from Nays he could not find the Cause of this so sudden an alteration He asked those who were with him What they conceived should be the reason of this denyal but they could not render him any satisfaction to his demands Sometimes he represented to himself that it was altogether impossible that Nays should so undervalue him and that all this was but a Device to solace her self a little and he thus discoursed with himself thereon If it were a Camisade which my Mistresse is pleased to give me I shall give her a greater occasion to laugh at me if I should return without seeing her as having too great an apprehension to displease her so that it would be better to use violence and enter with confidence into the place where she is for all the advertisements of her Servants for although she should be a little angry I know how to appease her and the contract for our Marriage being already passed I am confident I may be well allowed to assume that liberty But on the contrary if it be true that she doth disdain me and that she already repenteth what but yesterday she did to what purpose should I go unto her would it not cause her choler to increase against me And were it not better to proceed more gently on this affair The Spirit of Francion was hereupon in a great Incertainty and sometimes he would conclude with himself that it was no easie thing to put up this affront and if shame had not diswaded him he would have forced his way to the sight of Nays but he considered with himself that if he could not then see her for all the violence he should use she would but laugh at him the more so that at the last he concluded that it was better to use some artifice and to dissemble that the Message sent unto him did not much displease him and to return without the least noise Having better thought upon it he said unto some of the Servants who were then about him I must professe unto
Intent to have deceived her for after that time she entertained me with no more favourable Language so that abruptly I did depart from her I afterwards did write three Letters unto her to which she returned but one Answer in which she accused me of treachery and ingratitude For all that I continued to come unto her Mothers House but I did see her Daughter but seldom or if I had seen her it was without speaking to her I only conferred with her Mother to be informed of the time in which I was to make my most powerfull Sollicitations on her behalf but Salviati did represent unto us That by reason of the crafty proceedings of the opposite Party a Demurre was made in the hearing of her Canse When I perceived there was no hope to gain what I desired of Emilia I did not with such heat follow the Sute and because at that time also I courted Nays who daily did increase her affections towards me I only served her and doubled my attendance on her At that time the learned Hortensius by his gallantries did cause us to passe away our time in laughter which brought some ease to the impatiency of my Spirit Salviati once or twice demanded of me How I thrived in my Loves And what was the reason that I was so rare a Guest at Lucindaes house But I coldly replyed That I was afraid to appear too importunate I believe he perceived well enough that I had a thorough change wrought upon me but because he did speak no more unto me I also did endeavor to eschew his Company as much as possibly I could and some time it is since I heard any mention made of Emilia until Signior Bergamin did now speak of her I made nothing of it as you perceived for what reason had I to yield unto that which he alleged It may suffice that I have told you the truth of all without augmentation or diminution and you may now understand if Emilia hath a just Cause to desire any thing of me Francion having thus finished his Discourse Raymond said unto him That if this in truth were all Emilia could not constrain him to any thing but since she had discovered her most secret affairs which were made known to Bergamin he ought to have a care of that Bergamin who by his flouting Arts might make him ridiculous to the World I know not what he will do said Francion for Lucindaes and Emilias sake but I conceeive he came to the intelligence of it from Salviati I believe they gave him this commission to come unto me being a man of a more apprehensive Spirit and of a more courtly presence than his friend But howsoever it be neither one nor the other of them have any cause at all to laugh at me I have taken much pleasure at the entertainment of Emilia and can tell you something else which is more than that but that was not able to recompence my service for at that time I desired nothing more than her presence and esteemed it to be equal to the greatest happinesse which the world could afford It may be alleged it hath cost me something it may be so but it is so little that it is not considerable Salviati taking notice one time that I was buying so many yards of Genoa Sattin as would make me a compleat suit did tell me that he would also buy some of the same piece to make him a Doublet which he would wear with a pair of Breeches of Spanish cloath He took some of the same and suffered me to pay for his Sattin with my own In the same manner he sometimes also sollicited my liberality and his Camrade was not wanting in the same invention but because they had done some courtesies for me I did not refuse to be assisting to them To what end do riches serve but for honourable expences You have reason so to say replyed Raymond we must have pity on those honest fellows whose imployment it is to make us merry Men are made to be helpfull one to another and for such Drols as these they could not live if it were not for such persons as our selves But if Bergamin shall come again I would advise you not to despise his Remonstrances It were better to gain him by mildnesse which I believe is an easie thing to doe that so you may me be assured of him and the management of your loves may be concealed As they were in this communication Dorini came to see them and turning to Francion he told him that all was spoiled and that Nays was in such a passion against him that she could not be appeased Her love he said was turned into hatred and she would break whatsoever had passed betwixt them and had sworn to the performance of it Are you in good earnest said Francion and is it by her expresse commandement that I must come no more unto her It is a resolution unworthy of her and I deserve not to be so rejected Dorini made answer But observe the reasons of my Kinswoman I will dedeclare unto you what most unfortunately hath happened Yesterday late in the Evening there came two Ladies to her house who desired to speak with her one of them was called Lucinda and the other was her Daughter Emilia they are both of Venice and are come to Rome to follow a sute of Law Nays believed that they addressed themselves unto her to sollicite some friends of hers on their behalf as she hath some Kinsmen who sit in the chief seats of Justice she therefore commanded that they should come in being extremely charitable to all of her sex But she heard another businesse quite contrary to that which she expected Francions heart began to pant at this word of Emilia and already did suspect his mis-fortune which when Dorini perceived he thus continued his discourse Lucinda having taken Nays aside did represent unto her that she was very sorry that she no sooner understood what had passed betwixt you and her but at the first intelligence she made all the hast she could to forbid the Banes and to declare unto her that you had promised marriage to her Daughter Howsoever she hoped that the affair was not so far advanced but that a remedy might be yet appled and that Nays had understanding enough not to be married to such a man who having contracted himself to another Lady had so manifestly abused both of them Nays had a good opinion of these two Ladies who were accounted to be honest and honourable and she made no doubt but that their allegations were true At the last Emilia produced a Letter which you had wrote unto her by which Nays most apparently did perceive that you were most passionately inamoured on her Lucinda moreover did acquaint her that you had seen her Daughter alone and that you then had promised to espouse her This did wonderfully possesse Nays and did exasperate her against you which at that time she did not
perswade them to it for they were ashamed to show themselves so insatiable to a Man that was so prodigal I have heard it spoken indeed that these Gentlemen desired every one of them to borrow money of him and he being uncertain what answer to give them did at last resolve upon this gallantry When the Table-cloath was taken off every one of them did put his Mony upon the Table and counting it there they did all promise to pay it back to him again with Interest He desired them not to take care for that and assured them that he desired no other profit of his money but only the contentment to be stiled their Friend It sufficed him he said if at any time without Interest they would return the Money again for he knew well enough that he must stay long for it and besides he was in great danger to lose it all and it was to no purpose to demand Bonds of such young gallants who had such Parents that they would never be induced to pay for their Childrens Debauchment In this he acted the part of a magnificent Signior and I know not if that great Pretender Bragad in who hath been so famous in Venice did ever perform so noble an act although he vaunteth that he hath found the Philosophers stone and can produce out of other metals so much Gold as he pleaseth by his Powder of Perfection This Man also who stands there would perswade us to a belief that to authorise his Prodigality he is the Master of the same Secret but let him make it if he can he may be sure he shall have my good word no more than Bragadin had who being condemned for a Sorcerer and an Impostor was put to death in Germany and for ought that I know this Man doth deserve the same punishment We are moreover to consider that the French who are in this City ought not to be accepted as Witnesses in the behalf of this Offender for the greatest part of them are obliged to him and have received from him remarkable courtesies There are many things worthy your observation in that which I have spoken for first of all to lend and give away so much money to such a multitude of Men and to live at so high a rate as he doth which may suffice a Princes Court doth prove that of Necessity he must drive some unlawfull Trade which gives him the means still to hold out and to supply himself with so vast a bank of monies You ought also to consider his Cheats and how he doth impose sometimes on one and sometimes on another and the great disgrace and losse he brings to Italy by making current those pieces which are either not weight or alltogether counterfeit We may do well to look out some Novice lately come from France who is not yet guilty of his Liberality who freely may inform us if ever he heard of him in France and if he be not a Counterfeit himself and one who ought not to abuse the name of a Gentleman and we shall then perceive that it is an easie matter to be Liberal by false Merchandise We ought also to apprehend some of his Servants and strictly to examine them that we may be better informed in the secret of their Masters affairs The Iudge who heard all this commanded the Accuser to be silent and taking him aside told him That he had done very ill so manifestly to discover these proceedings of Iustice He did well to enjoyn him silence for he laboured with such a flux of words that he did speak all that which he did know and all that which he did not know and he could hardly be restrained but would still have accumulated more calumniations on him which were all farr from the truth for he imputed to Francion alone whatsoever he had heard spoken before of all the Mountebanks and Impostors that were ever seen in Italy Francion who found that this Information had not the least apparence and observed the affected passion in which his Accuser did expresse himself and the strange postures and ill-favoured faces which he made could hardly in the despight and midst of his Misfortune forbear from laughter The Magistrate that was then present and was a Man of some understanding did give no great respect unto that Informer but commanded him the second time to hold his peace and it being much about the time of Dinner he said he would have this businesse examined again at some other time and so dismissed the Company The charge of Francions person was committed to one who kept him Prisoner in his own house untill his Processe could be better drawn up for he told his Accuser that he must put his Bill into a better form and not make such deviations in it nor allege such things against him which he could not prove After that he provided a Chamber for Francion and brought him wherewith to eat As for Francion himself he was wonderfully amazed that he was fallen into this Misfortune Sometimes he believed that he was taken for some other who was called by his Name or did resemble him in Countenance and had been guilty of such Impostures but the counterfeit pieces which were put into his Pocket did check that supposition and assured him that it could not be any such mistake but a design contrived on purpose unjustly to accuse him to take away his Life Neverthelesse he trusted in his Innocence which he knew would be then undisputably apparent when his Cause should be more maturely examined He had also an assured confidence of the Assistance of all of his own Nation that were then at Rome by whom he was wonderfully beloved and respected He was not deceived in that belief for as soon as Raymond had made it known that Francion was a Prisoner they all assembled themselves to understand the reason of it and to procure his deliverance if it were possible The Lackyes of Raymond had followed the Serjeants and took notice of the House into which Francion was carried As for his own Lackyes they had a design to play the Waggs and had left him in the Perfumers shop It was some content unto them to know in what place he was Neverthelesse they placed Spies up and down that Street to give notice if peradventure he should be conveyed to some other place They did sufficiently understand the cause of his Imprisonmen but alleged it was not ground enough to cause him to be apprehended All his Friends did joyntly indeavour themselves to sollicit all the Great Ones whom they knew for his inlargement by demonstrating unto them that he was of an unblamed Conversation and one who abhorred to commit any fraudulent act but on the contrary that he was indued with so much Merit that all persons of Honour and Virtue were obliged to defend him There were many Signiors of Italy who promised to use all the Authority of their Friends and their own power for his liberty Neverthelesse it
not use him roughly enough and because he perceived that they were unprovided of Instruments to rack him Neverthelesse he was resolved to burn his feet Therupon they pulled off his Stockings and took the hot Iron from out of the Fire He then perceived that they were in earnest believed he should be a very fool to suffer himself to be tormented for not discovering the truth He told them then that if they would forbear to torture him he would declare unto them whatsoever he did know Raymond assured him that what he had as yet confessed was of little or no importance and that he had contradicted himself in it and moreover he was confident that he had other secrets to reveal and untill he had declared them to him he neither could nor would be satisfied I will then declare unto you all said Corsegua and more than you do expect Begin then said Audebert and we will unbind you that with more ease you may discharge what lyes upon your Conscience But will you promise then to pardon me said Corsegua I swear unto you that I will said Raymond I told you before said Corsegua that I was a Servant to Valerius and I told you no untruth in it Valerius is a Gentleman of a good Family I many years did wear his Fathers Livery and I have since been a Servant to his Son but I never gained any great fortunes by him for my Master is more in apparence than effect and his wealth is not so observable as the antiquity of his Family neverthelesse I do love him so entirely that there is nothing in the World which I would not doe for him except to give away my life which to speak the truth is more dear unto me than all the obligations in the world as you easily may perceive by me for if I were content to die for him you should torment me as you please rather than I would discover his secrets to you which now I doe for the preservation of my life Understand then that a long time he hath born a deep grudge to the Frenchman that was yesterday apprehended and that before now he hath endeavoured to procure his death having betrayed him into a Castle from whence he thought he should never have come forth He was much astonished when afterwards he heard he was at Rome and that he continued to Court Nays whose good will he had gained This did fill him with such rage and jealousie that I am not able to represent it to you He himself loved Nays for her perfections and for her riches which would have conduced much to have repaired the Ruines of his Family and it could not but be a great grief unto him to lose so good a Fortune Hereupon he was resolved to destroy Francion and to take from him at once both his Life and his Honor by accusing him for coyning of false monyes We have often seen him in the Churches and other publick places and the nimblest and most experienced Cut-purses in this City have had notice of it but they could never untill this morning convey the money into his Pocket Immediatly afterwards we acquainted the Mercers That there was a brave French Gentleman comming up that Street who by his out-side promised to be an advantagious Customer unto them As he passed by they pressed upon him to buy some Silks of them with much importunity but at the last of his own accord he stayed at the Perfumers shop where taking the mony out of his Pocket we immediatly seized upon him and brought him before a Iudge who is altogether at my Masters devotion and will do according to his Direction There is a Man also bribed for a certain sum of Silver who hath accused Francion of divers crimes which he strongly will maintain To render the affair more criminal and undoubtfull I came hither this afternoon with a little Coffer under my Cloak in which were great store of counterfeit pieces I had a design to have conveyed it into Francions Chamber You were then gone into the City and the Servants were sweeping the Chambers I therefore entred without any difficulty pretending to ask for a Friend but I mistook one Chamber for another and instead of conveying the Coffer into Francions Chamber I have thrust it into this I believe you will find it on the further side of the Bed But it was not enough for my Master to have done this He hath given me since the Tools also which they use in the Coyning of false mony which being put into a leathern bagg I brought along with me when I came with the Officers who were all in a confusion My design was to have hid them in some Cabinet neer unto Francions Chamber and then to have brought thither my Companions to cause them to seize upon them as belonging unto him but I could not find the opportunity so to do I have therefore hid the Bagg in the Garret and as I came to advertise the Serjeants of it who had Commission to make a generall search I found that they were all gone and that I was left alone to my own destruction When he had spoke this they searched with a Candle behind the Bed where they found the little Coffer accordingly as he had said but they had no key to open it but by the shaking of it they found that within it there was great store of money at the last they did break it open by force and they found that they were all false Pieces As in a deep amazement they were beholding this Corsegua desired them that they would lend him a little longer their attention and thus he continued his Discourse If what I have now revealed to you should arive to my Masters ear he would be inexorably incensed against me but he hath no cause to complain of me for having done what I have I think I have done enough for him since I have thrown my self into the greatest dangers And because I have declared unto you his secrets there is no reason that I should spare others although you have not sollicited me unto it for I should be sorry that he alone should be accused for an enterprise when he hath others to be partakers with him You shall understand therefore that Nays hath been courted by a Venetian Lord called Ergastus He was heretofore wonderfully jealous of my Master and my Master was as jealous of him but because they perceived that neither of them were accepted and that she neglected their service to countenance a stranger they reconciled themselves to enter into a conspiracy against him and caused him to be imprisoned in a Castle of one of their friends and immediatly thereupon one Salviati was hired to counterfeit disobliging Letters in the name of Francion which were sent unto Nays to make her believe that he grew weary of her service and would abandon her for ever having no mind at all to come to Rome But Francion not long afterwards
us presently out of that quarter But before we dislodged we resolved to use some trick to be revenged of his malice His name was Lucrin and his disposition was not unanswerable being sordidly griping and of a base dull temper But there was another of the same faculty called Morizet who lived in a street somewhat more remote a joviall merry soule and no enemy to persons of our profession This Commissary using to visite us sometimes we acquainted Lucrin with his coming who took it as a great affront to him and an encroaching upon his Prerogative assuring us he would suffer no other Officer to meddle in his jurisdiction At length to make our accusation good against Morizet who we affirmed had spoken much to the prejudice and disparagement of the other one night we sent for Morizet as if we had some earnest businesse to impart to him having first hid Lucrin in a little closet next my chamber at his arrivall he found four Gentlemen in my company whom he taking upon him to examine what they came to doe with me they answered they would give him no account and I to second them said I was not obliged to declare my actions to him for Lucrin had told me he had no power to act as Commissary in our Quarter Hereupon he replyed Lucrin lyed like a Sot and so continued railing against Lucrin in such vilifying termes as made him like an enraged Lyon fly out of his Den upon him and for want of other weapons batter his face with his fists Morizet to defend himselfe and not seeme ingratefull return'd him as many blowes with a soure cudgell he light upon by chance and the hotter the combat grew the better were we pleased At last comming to cloze they scratch'd bit and tumbled together upon the ground where they so pummeld each other that their eyes look'd like eggs potch'd in black butter and the rest of their faces red blew and yellow like pieces of China Taffetas There wanted a third Commissary to part these two who instead of making others keep the Peace were ready to teare out one anothers throat But the Gentlemen who accompanyed us at length thought good to performe that office one of them as they went to separate em saying with an imperious tone How now Rascalls have you the impudence to quarrell in my presence What will you raise a scandall upon such an honest house as this is If your impertinence provoke my fury any farther I shall soon make Mince-meat of you both so let 's have peace presently embrace each other I bid you and that quickly nay let me see you kiss too and shake hands Upon this command the Commissaries left fighting both much ashamed for what they had done yet the animosity their hearts abounded with would not permit them to be so easily agreed However to confirme their seeming Amity the Gentleman commanded his Lacquay to get something for a Collation and some wine to make them drink together We thought it not convenient to send for any thing abroad but made them be contented with what we had in the house so with some eggs that remained of our Saturday night supper and a few slices of bacon a Froise was presently made and served in with great pomp and magnificence Come said the Gentleman to the two Commissaries you must eat with me or I le eat you That said he put his hand to the dish first and Morizet without farther invitation fell to exercise his teeth but Lucrin out of shame or a sullen reservation slighted the courtesie insomuch as the Gentleman seeming displeased forced open his mouth and holding him by the chin with one hand and taking a piece of the Froise with the other flung it in as a Mason does Mortar off his Trowel into a hole that wants stopping his Eyes Beard and Doublet had each their share of the spattering so seeing there was no remedy he reformed his crosse-grain'd humour and became more sociable After this the Lacquay was commanded to give Morizet a glasse of Wine and he bidden to drink a Health to Lucrin So without farther ceremony taking the Glasse Here Mr. Commissary said he I le drink to you to let you see I harbour no malice in my heart The Wiseman sayes We must forget injuries The next Plot was to make Lucrin drink to Morizet which he did with such shew of reluctancie as his hand shaking through feare or disdaine above halfe the Wine was spilt before the Glasse reach'd his mouth However seeing 't was in vain to withstand their wills I will drink to you because I must said he with a trembling voice And after that he would neither eate nor drink more in their company neither was he much intreated Morizet did that office for him and stirr'd not till our Bottle was suck'd out After this refection they desired to repaire home but seeing they had torn their Ruffs to pieces in the conflict loth to goe through the streets in that equipage they intreated the Gentlemen to give their Lacquayes leave to goe and desire their wives to send them other Linne The Gallants answered they could not spare their Servants to goe so farre but there were Semsters nearer could furnish them if they would send for one they were willing to doe them that courtesie So one of our neighbours was fetch'd presently who having the watch-word brought none but broad Bands with deep laces that were not for their Wear besides making her price was foure times more than they were worth the pittifull fellowes unwilling to part with so much money were forc'd to sneak home without and hide their noses with their long Cloaks for feare of being knowne onely Morizet's ingenuity furnish'd him with the invention to put his handkerchief about his Neck which serv'd instead of a falling band Next day the Gentlemen went in a Coach to their houses well attended with stout lacquayes and forc'd them to beare them company to our house where taking Perretta and me as if they intended to carry us somewhere to be merry and make a perfect reconcilement they brought us all together to the play-house and the Comedians already instructed by those Gallants of all the Passages betwixt the two Commissaries made their Scuffle the subject of all their Drollerie to the grand satisfaction of all the Spectators except the two Combatants who sensible of that publique affront complotted how to be reveng'd and though they left us without any shew of distaste they fomented a resolution to contrive our ruine laying their private enmities aside to unite their powers against us as occasion should invite them to doe us mischief But we fearing the storme should break unawares upon us to shelter our selves from theirs as well as others malicious practises forthwith forsook that quarter where I confesse we had made an indifferent good harvest We retired into the Suburbs to a paultrie little house afarre off where we remembred with regret the high cheere we used
jealousie and far from that Liberty which you Frenchmen do professe But because the Sollicitor whose Name is Salviati is of a sociable disposition I promise you I will take the opportunity to be more familiar with him Having spoke this Bergamin did withdraw himself to go to Dinner to a Signior who had that morning invited him The next morning he came to me again and told me That he had another conference with Salviati and that he had spoken to him of me and assured him that although I was a Stranger yet my Condition and Deserts did render me most esteemed amongst the Great Ones insomuch that I was very capable to assist those who were in Distresse and that having heard of the Disaster which had befallen the House of Lucinda I had pity of her and wished that it might lie in my power to do her any service He therefore advised him to addresse himself to me and to give me a particular account of the whole businesse for he said I was throughly experienced in the affairs of Law But as for the manner of the Death of Fabius the Husband of Lucinda he said It were better if I would be pleased to take the pains to speak with her my self I promised him said Bergamin to acquaint you with it and behold how all things do succeed according to your Desire Hereupon I did embrace Bergamin being transported with a great joy that I had found the means to be acquainted with Lucinda Bergamin said unto me But stay a little we must be wise and use precautions in this businesse I can speak to Salviati of Lucinda because she is antient and therefore not to be suspected but I know not how to make mention to him of her Daughter With much difficulty I have learned that her Name is Emilia I replyed to him Let me alone with it I will deport my self according to the Italian humor and because you have given such a good report to Salviati of me I will be carefull that you shall not therein be found a Lyar. Bergamin having continued with me a little while after this Discourse did repair into the City and assured me that he would bring Salviati along with him I was unwilling that he should come unto my own Lodging because of the great numbers of French Gentlemen who constantly came to visit me I was at that time brave Raymond lodged in the same House with you and I will not dissemble with you it was from you from whom most precisely I would conceal my self I thought if you had understood of my dealings and practices with the Italians you would have suspected something and hindred my Design Oh no said Raymond To believe that were to doubt of my affection You knew replyed Francion It was at the same time when I was courting of Nays and that was one of the Reasons why I did conceal it from you What said Raymond Do you take me to be an Enemy unto Nature Since you are not yet possessed of Nays Why shall it not be permitted to you to court another Nay Suppose that you had been married to her you would not be the first to whom Love hath given passions to inthrall your self to another Beauty Let us live together as we have been accustomed there is nothing that should disswade you from declaring your Secrets unto me So said Francion We should be guilty of one anothers Debauchments Give me leave to tell you There are some things which even Shame doth forbid us to declare unto our Friends and they ought not to be offended if they do not reveal them for if they be but Indifferences proceeding from Female causes it will no wayes diminish Friendship to conceal them But to perfect my adventure I must acquaint you That I desired Bergamin to bring Salviati with him to a Church where I would be walking Bergamin did applaud the counsel for that said he would be as if by accident we did meet with you and I will not acquaint him that you are waiting there in the expectation of him In this manner it was carried and although I perceived that Salviati did put on a grave and a reserved Countenance I with many Complements did invite them both to Dine with me Salviati seemed to be very unwilling and ceremonious but Bergamin overcame his resistances and we did go together into an Ordinary where we might be accommodated at what rate we pleased There we did enter into a perfect acquaintance and Bergamin taking an occasion to speak of Lucinda did openly professe that I might be very helpfull to her Sir you shall then perform a great work of Charity said Salviati she is a Widdow without Friends and without protection She knows not any one in Rome except my self who have a long time dwelled in Venice but all that I can do is but to follow the Law for her having no countenance at all from the great Officers of Iustice I could wish that she might be so happy as to find one that may assist her not only for the good will I do bear unto her but also for my own consideration for the compassion which I have had on her Misfortunes hath ingaged me in certain round Sums of moneys unto divers Merchants which I know not how to return if her Sute in Law doth not find a happy event I replyed to him That I was acquainted with some Cardinals of the greatest power with whom I had been familiar at Paris before they arrived to that height of Dignity and having saluted them since my comming to Rome they so nobly intertained me that I believe they will not deny any civil courtesie which I shall demand of them He made answer That in truth it is daily observed that those great Personages do render themselves more easie and favourable to Strangers than to those of their own Nation for they undervalue those whom they see every day and in obliging those who are Foreiners they do hope it will render their courtesy and their renown more glorious Those words were not acceptable unto me for they tended not to cause me to understand that if I were high in the favour of the Great Ones it was for some eminent Deserts with which they saw me to be indued I looked on him as a blunt Fellow who knew not what did belong to the Civilities of a Courtier and because they should not entertain a base opinion of me I gave them to understand That it was not my Custom to Dine in such places as where I then was but only at that time I did inforce my self unto it that more freely I might enjoy their Company Speaking those words they both stooped and made many Reverences unto me and having both expressed their thankfull obligations Salviati said unto me That if I would take the pains to give a visit to Lucinda that afternoon she would take it for a great honor and receiving the particulars of her Cause from her own mouth I
should be the better able to inform them to whom the greatest places in the Seats of Justice did belong I was ravished to hear this Proposition hoping that I should have the happinesse to see Emilia also although he made not the least mention of her Bergamin knowing that his presence was unnecessary did willingly leave us and accompanied with Salviati I came to the House of Lucinda It was but a little one but commodious enough for a Widdow-woman who lived alone in it Salviati entred into it as freely as if it had been his own and we found Lucinda in the Hall and her Daughter Emilia with her I must protest unto you that I never did behold a more delicat creature I fastned my eyes upon her but as soon as she perceived it she did retire her self into the Parlor Salviati represented to Lucinda that I was the Man of whom in the morning he had made mention to her and that he hoped I should be very profitable for the advancement of her Affairs She received me with very civil complements for she was a Woman of a gallant Spirit and Behaviour and was lovely enough being not so old as the weeds of her Widdowhood did make her to appear Having related to me all along the proceedings of her Husband against one called Tostat who deteined a great part of his Estate from him she told me also how he was killed as he was travelling from Venice unto Padua and that the said Tostat being apprehenhended she came to Rome to follow the Law against him and hoped that being condemned to Death she should have great Damages and Interests awarded her I repeated to her the promises which I had made to her Sollicicitor but I protest unto you I had much to do to remember the words she spake so much was my Spirit diverted by the Beauties of Emilia I could not but curse the Custom of the Italians which do not allow us the civil liberty to look on their Wives or Daughters At the last it so happily did fall out that Lucinda did begin to talk of her which was a great comfort to me She said That she did not much care for any great Dammages the Law should give her for she had enough already to content her during her life having but one Daughter who was shortly to enter into a Religious House and to have no more to do with the goods of Fortune I assumed the freedom to demand of her If it were she whom I saw when I first came into her House She told me Yes and as I did represene unto her that there were some Men who would think themselves most happy to have such a Wife She replyed she was descended of Honourable Parentage but having not means enough to marry her according to her Birth the safest way she could take with her was to put her into a Nunnery We maintained other Discourse on this subject and after that I conceived that I had stayed long enough I took my leave of her Being gone I demanded of Salviati if in good earnest Emilia was resolved to confine her self unto a Cloister He told me Yes and that she only stayed for money to give unto the Prioress which her Mother hoped to receive from the charity of well-affected people For my self said I I shall be ready to assist her but I should be more glad my money should serve to marry her than to retire her from the world He laughed at those words and we discoursed afterwards of her Beauty and her Merit I must confesse unto you that having seen her I was the more incited to do something for her Mother and I endeavoured what lay in my power that she might gain her Processe to the end that she might have wherewith to marry her Daughter according to her Condition and Degree I took my leave of Salviati and visited all those one after another whom I conceived to be capable to assist Lucinda After the end of two days I returned to her to give her an account of what I had done She thanked me most heartily and told me That she should confesse her self to be much obliged to me all the dayes of her life We were then alone in the Hall when behold Emilia came in She seemed to be something abashed to behold me and made as though she would return from whence she came but her Mother did command her to stay which was indeed a very acceptable recompence for the pains I had taken I parlyed to her with that discretion which is practised in that Country and I did not praise her but very modestly Neverthelesse I made it appear that she had touched me within my heart and that I much desired to have such a Mistresse I stayed with her as long as possibly I could and taking my leave I promised her Mother that I would visit some other Lords on her behalf which I performed with extraordinary care I must confesse that Nays is beautifull but Emilia hath such attractions that when I see not Nays I cannot but contemplate on Emilia I no longer did content my self with my antient delights I had rather have perpetually entertained my self with this if it had been possible for me but I found I could not arrive unto it but by marriage only To marry Emilia was not pleasing to me she having no other riches but what were grounded on a Processe which might be as well lost as gained Neverthelesse I deliberated with my self that if I would receive any Pleasure from her it must be by the pretence of Marriage so that oftentimes I discoursed with Salviati concerning her and told him that he must not give way unto her to enter into a Relligious house that it was no true Devotion that did perswade her to it but her Mothers and her own Ambition because for the present she had not wealth enough to Marry her according to her Condition She was endued I said with such perfections that divers persons of quality would take her freely without demanding any Dowry but her Vertue I in that manner did so discover my self unto him that he perceived I did speak of my self of which he was very glad and I believe did advertise Lucinda of it But because I could not see her every time I did go to her Mothers house and could not speak aloud unto her before her Mother it did much afflict me being accustomed to speak freely to young Gentlewomen after the Manner of the French I could not expresse my Love unto her nothing did speak but my eies only but in this Country of Italy but one glance or little action will oftentimes speak more to purpose than all the long entertainments of other Nations I could not be satisfied with that and was therefore resolved to write unto her and to desire Salviati to deliver my Letters To write unto her a Letter of Love seemed to be too bold and too difficult an enterprize for the first time I