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A67888 The Irish footman's poetry, or, George the rvnner against Henry the walker, in defence of Iohn the Swimmer being a sur-rejoinder to the rejoinder of the rusty ironmonger who endeavored to defile the cleare streames of the water-poet's Helicon / the author George Richardson ... Richardson, George, fl. 1641.; Taylor, John, 1580-1653. 1641 (1641) Wing R1383; Wing T471; ESTC R2346 3,300 12

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THE IRISH FOOTMAN'S POETRY OR GEORGE THE RVNNER AGAINST HENRY THE WALKER In defence of Iohn the Swimmer Being A Sur-rejoinder to the Rejoinder of the rusty Ironmonger who endeavoured to defile the cleare streames of the Water-Poet's Helicon The Author GEORGE RICHARDSON an Hibernian Pedestrian Printed in the yeare 1641. TO GEORGE RICHARDSON HIS CVRRANT FRIEND IN any part of the Kings Dominions NO more friend George shall wee see Thee marching in the Infantr'ie Now thou hast gotten greater force And mounted on the winged Horse After no charriot thou shalt runne Henceforth but that of Phaeton H. F. To GEORGE RICHARDSON the Pedestrian Poet WHen first thy lines I read I did admire Them like the learning of Promethean fire For he who knowes thee have so little Art Could thinke that nature should so much impart To raise thee to the height to vindicate Th' Aquatique Poet from the furious hate Of weavers tinkers through the nose that whistle Ironmongers and Brethren of the bristle Now trust me George this work deserves such praise That not to us but unto after dayes 'T will say thou wer`t a Poet of a maw As great as thy great namesake of the Law W. B. To my ingenuous Countryman the Authour 'T Is stranger you would goe swift pac'd steps forsak And rest a strangers taske to undertake Doubtles you meane to ride hence forth this matter Deserves a horse if not to ride by water T. LL. GEORGE RICHARDSON the Authour to the most ingenious aquatique Poet Mr: JOHN TAYLOR SIr though a stranger to your selfe your worth Is knowne to me by what you have set forth And though I cannot judge yet I admire The lively flames of your Phaebean fire Which wise-men doe approve none doe deprave But such as know not fancy as this slave Rusty as his old iron dull as stone Or th' anvill that his ware is wrought upon Who stupid slave by what hee never writ But bought for 's money your undoubted wit Would call in question Sir my infant muse Seing this slave persist in his abuse And knowing 't would a great dishonour bee For you to match your ingenuity With his notorious folly speedily Did undertake to make a swift reply Which soone as my employment did allow Mee time in two houres space I did run through Upon the title of Walkers Booke BEhold the Master peice of Walker's wit Fancying his friend the Divell here at shit Who first with malice did inspire his breast And then his first Bookes matter did suggest But t' is some silly fiend as sure as day The same perhaps was made an Asse i' th play Long since but I 'me deceiv'd there 's much brave wit I' th play but Walkers bookes have none of it What are they fit for then that onely raile Naught but to wipe his shitten Divels taile 1. His view of the transformed Divell VVHat wondrous raptures this our Author here Doth dreame of wine who hardly ere dranke beere Or any thing so mighty Horace's Lire Tels us what drinke doth most what least inspire 2. His Pedegree A Monstrous Birth sprong from the sheaves of wheat Tresh'd out he should have said for sure the great Father of this brave Sparke some tough blade was That cudgelled the corne and slash'd the grasse For such his base demeanour speakes him I Doe not detract from the old family Of Bredsall all this while nor doe I know Whether he bee extracted thence or no Oft 't is of worthy families the fate To send some Children forth degenerate But by his manners hee should rather bee Of that Ape Carriers affinity Hight Richard Walker but call'd Cherry-lickam Whom with his well taught-beast I saw at Wickam Doing rare trickes with many a lofty straine For Englands King but clapt his Arse at Spaine Told money which his Master cannot doe Yet hee a Walker is and Wanderer too But le ts admit our Libeller to bee Sprong from the wheaten Bredsall family And that the Golden-sheaves that doe belong Vnto that family this Ironmong-ER Er may justly challenge for his owne yet hee Hath armes which better fit his quality The Armes of his owne atcheivement A Gridiron passant on which lies A Libeller doth simbolize A Cart that doth up Holborne passe A sable trivet next wee place In cheif which you may easily Conceive doth Tiburne signifie To seeke a Rope weel 'e not take paines For worst delinquents hang in Chaines Then for supporters there shall stand Two men as true as steele in hand They rusty Iron forkes shall weild Thus you may blazonize his sheild 2. His Disposition IS it not vaine to tax his muse that writ Of a bad Subject to discover it Vnto the heedles World that when they see The thing attir'd in it's deformity They then may loath it that before appear'd Pleasing to them before the mist was clear'd Taylor his whore if rightly understood Deserves much honour 't was his Countrie 's good That set his muse on worke the rogue set forth In Spanish is a Booke of matchlesse worth Which honest men approve hee that doth looke Awry on it is Subject of the Booke 4. The Encounter I Know 't is not your custome to abuse The peoples eares with fancies of your muse For where there 's no invention straines of wit Can have no birth were you endu'd with it What monsters you 'd beget alreadi 's knowne By fathering of these are not your owne But what you publish here if wee admit To bee your owne Taylor those workes hath writ That a just Catalogue of them will fill More leaves then you have stained with your quill Leave then your ostentation time ne're saw An Eagle dar'd to combate by a Daw 5. His Religion 6. His Hypocrisie I 'Ve made a scrutinie but cannot find One word in Taylors Booke shews him inclin'd To Popery 't is true hee cann't approve Of Brownists nor the Familists of love Of Anabaptists nor of Adamites Nor those instruct their audience when the lights Are out and by their owne example too As well as precept teach them what to doe Though Ir'nmongers or Feltmakers they bee Or Coblers or what els fraternity This being all 't is straing hee not invites Your spleene that hath describ'd the Adamites The Brownists conventicle too that writ But 't is your envy to brave Taylors wit Hee onely is accus'd although they bee Guilty of as much Popery as hee Your faith I doe not question nor will make Much matter of argument what side you take But Taylor's guilty of Hipocrisie Because hee did comply with miserie A powerfull reason shame to vent such stuffe Snuffers are sweeter ware with unquencht snuffe 7. The Church persecuted by water A Title which doth promise at the least A copious treatise like that pregnant beast That travell'd with a mountaine yet brought forth A litle molehill see the lesser worth Of this poore fellow who can scarce discerne A difference 'twixt him did guide the sterne Of the great Barke oth'Church and him that neere A bigger vessell then an oare did steere 8. His weakenesse in judgement NOw I doe pitty thee that dares to tax Anothers judgemen when more time 't will aske Then was to teach the Asse to speake assign'd To render thy dull wits halfe so refin'd As the well-tuter'd Ape that 's Pupill to Thy name-sake Walker yet with much adoe Tha 'st made an Anagram of thine owne name And an AEnigma to thou think'st what fame Will not be due to thee well thou maist scoren The Dung-hill Pamphlets thou set'st forth t' adorne With th' honoured subscription of the name That 's grac'd with such an heavenly Anagram 9. His horrible lies ONe Distichon is all the verse ha's writ There 's just as many faults as lines in it 10. My sincerity to England IF you affirme this with sincerity I m'e confident in it wee doe agree 11. His humble Petition VVHat forward impudence is this to dare Before those noble Senators to appeare Clad in such ragges if ought 'gainst Church or State Hee hath offended with an equall hate I shall pursue him or transgress'd the lawes And made unto himselfe a guilty cause Or that it shall appeare in the least word Hee hath ●●aduc'd that lov'd and honour'd Lord But if o' th contrary it shall appeare His conscience and his judgement were more clear And that hee did nor Church nor State traduce Nor that most noble Lord with least abuse Then Caesar-like when Horace did acquite Himselfe before him then when 'gainst all right A base officious Tribune did accuse The harmeles recreation of his muse As that in mistique Hieroglyphickes hee Had plotted 'gainst the State some teachery Great Caesar gave the Poet higher place In 's favour and the Tribune the disgrace To weare a paire of Asses eares so now When these great Senators on Taylor's brow Read innocence his merrit they shall raise By giving thee the whip and him the bayes 12. The Conclusion ANd now friend Walker this but to prepare My muse to encounter if you dare With a foote-Poet enter in the sand You as you have lost by water may by land POSTSCRIPT ALthough in Ireland I was born and bred In Englands Church I nourisht am and fed Therefore let no dull Brownists apprehend That in defence of Popery I contend I doe esteeme both Sects as most a curst But of the twayn I thinke the Brownist worst FINIS