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A36972 An essay towards the theory of the intelligible world intuitively considered designed for forty-nine parts : Part III : consisting of a preface, a postscript, and a little something between / by Gabriel John ; enriched with a faithful account of his ideal voyage, and illustrated with poems by several hands, as likewise with other strange things not insufferably clever, nor furiously to the purpose. D'Urfey, Thomas, 1653-1723. 1700 (1700) Wing D2721; ESTC T139705 74,146 239

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grown Intelligible The subtile Philosophy of F. Malebranch the seraphick Speculations of Mr. Norris and the irrefragable Argumentations of Mr. Dodwel's Epistle which I must confess with Shame appear'd formerly to my weak and dull Brain in the Shape of visionary Imaginations double-minded Sophisms Shadows of Eccho and Sick-men's Dreams do now put on another Form and show themselves in the clearest Light to be as finely deduced and as strongly coherent as if Truth her self had joined them together by way of Demonstration as no doubt She has taken that Pains in some Cases From this strange Effect and admirable Elucidation of my Intellectual Powers 't is a reasonable Conclusion that whoever makes a Visit to the Ideal World is as sure to return a Philosopher as he that Dreams upon Parnassus to awake a Poet. The great Reason I have to rejoice for the Death of Mr. Scarron That He would have been the most likely Person to have made a Iest of my Theory or Travested it into some whimsical Burlesque as soon as ever Mr. Boyer shall have finish'd his French Translation I know the Malice of the World and therefore can well enough foresee that the Honour I shall gain by this elaborate Work will provoke a great many envious Persons to set upon me with pretended Answers and real Abuses This indeed I am little concern'd at See Theory of the Intelligible W. P. 1. ● 149. being satisfied that no part of my Theory lies open to the least Objection and therefore the only Adversaries I greatly apprehend are your unlucky Drolls to whom these re●ined Speculations may appear like Unintelligible Iargon These Persons being endued with sufficient Ill-Nature and abundant Leisure-Time from their Business See abundance of Places in the Sacred and the Ideal Theories will probably endeavour instead of answering my Theory to turn the most Weighty Parts of it into Comical Conceits or expose them in some Odd and Humourous Disguise thereby to Banter Mankind into an Opinion that 't is all no more than a mere Fancy or a kind of Philosophical Romance I am sorely afraid if an Angel should write such a Theory as this these Men of Parts would pass the same Iudgment upon it by reason of the Narrowness of their Spirit and Vnderstanding 'T is certain that a pleasant Vein of Raillery may sport it self with the noblest Composition and make the most sublime Truths a Subject of Laughter and there are a Crew of Little Wits the very Pest of a Common-wealth that will be nibling at every thing that 's great and by these I expect to be Digni●ied with the Title of Visionist or Enthusiast only because the Truths I deliver are above their Comprehension Be it known to them that whether these or whatever other Names they shall chuse in their Great Wisdom to sit me withal I shall not think them worth a serious Answer and to write in their trifling manner is below If any Learned Person shall make an Attempt upon my Book in a Logical or a Metaphysical way he shall be considered but this as was said I don't at all apprehend If I here express my self with some Assurance See Preface to the First Volume of Mr. Norris's Theory 't is not that I prefer my Rational Abilities before those of other Men but it must be consider'd that I have been long Conversant in this kind of Studies and therefore may see things in a better Light than they do though not with better Eyes Nay so many thoughtful and solitary Hours so many nightly Lamps and Lucubrations have these Studies cost me that indeed my poor Eyes what with Age and what with assiduous Poring have the one departed this World and the other almost worn it self out with incessant Grief for the Loss of its Fellow By this I am accidentally reduced very near to that State of Illuminating Blindness which F. Malebranch had at first recommended to me and I think therefore 't is very hard if by this Time and with all these Advantages I may not be allow'd to know something of the matter Another Panegyrick upon my own Performance An Epitaph upon some of my Abortive Works The Causes of their Abortion My Grief and Weepings thereupon Polyuhemi lata Acies The Beauty of an Excrescence 'T Is with Tears in my Eye and great Anguish of Mind that I am going to mention how many Witty Things I have Iudiciously blotted out how many Dainty Thoughts and Curious Strokes I have either cramp'd or quite erazed tho' it went grievously against my Will and I could not be so cruel to my own dear Conceptions without a very tender Reluctancy of my Bowels All this I was forced to in Deference to the Authority of Milbourn Dennis Rymer c. Tyrannical as it is because tho' the Sentences were extreamly fine and beautiful it happenned that they were not much to the Purpose The Reader will see that my Book as now it stands is remarkable for the same Precise Justness with the Writings of Virgil there being nothing that can be taken from either without maiming the whole nothing that can be added to either without the Deformity of an Excresence This is the chief Point and a very rare Piece of Mastery Never to say too little nor too much and yet it makes good Mr. Waller's Saying of us Poets that we lose half the Praise we should have got Could it be known what we Discreetly blot This is my Case and to satisfie you that it is any Gentleman who will please to buy Six of my Books shall command a Sight of my foul Copy and my Adversaria both to see the Truth of what I am asserting and to enjoy the Pleasure of those lively Sketches which must now be for ever lost to the World and for the Loss of which the World owes but small Thanks to those Cynical Criticks above-noted Among other Remarkables you may see a Panegyrick upon Whip-stitch Slap-dash and Collier's Essays another touching L R s Council during his Intowerment and the of his Political Apostasy from G B 's Religious Principles You may see also a smart Saying upon Wise-acres and a charming Phrase for opening an Oyster both Fire-new besides two various Lection of great Importance to History upon the famous Garismachides a lost Author who is thought to have written nothing Not one of these shall ever be seen but upon the Conditions proposed and I am not a Man to be Wheedled out of a Purpose once settled in my Mind tho' it were to translate Hickeringil's or Toland's Works into Latin Verses any more than to be perswaded out of an Opinion I have once imbraced tho' it were that Toland and Hickeringil are both Saints or either of them a Philosopher Why the Author is so Desirous of being thought a Wit now in his Old Age. An Humble Request that the Reader would Humour him therein I Am well aware that among Persons who Canvas matters Nicely and are very Circumspect
The youngest was a Maiden-Body I little thought that she should so dye For she could cure Distempers marry And was a kind of ' Pothecary There 's Dr. Salmon would have bought her Tho meerly for her * The Cant-word or Term of Art for Cow-Piss All-flower Water At making which she had such Skill No Lady better could distill ' Twou'd cure Green-sickness and the Scurvy No Cow in England could with her vye The Fluor Albus and the Tumor Hydropick and Athritick Humor No Beast of ' Natomy e'er knew more She 'd have made Water for a Wager Had any ventured to engage her Nay Bromf●ild's Pills 't wou'd soon have cast out And Daffy's ' Lixir is an Ass to 't Pray what would Iuno say if Folk Stole Peacocks tho' t were in a Joke I 'm sure I 'd sooner eat my Nails Than touch a Feather of their Tails She 'd set her Clack up and so scold me Heaven would be soon too hot to hold me Nay Iove would rather wish Udzookers To have his Chimnies all turn Smoakers There 's Pallas keeps her Owls as chary Even as the Apple of her Blear-eye The Goddess-ship of her Divinity Or Maiden-head of her Virginity Her very Wisdom and Puissance With which she frightens Rats and Mice hence Could th' Harpies so torment Aeneas That shortly will be chosen a Deus And spoil his Dinner with a Vengeance That was as Odious and as Ingens As the most wisest Hist'ry mentions Bellum etiam pro caede boum Quoth th' Old One in a Passion to ' em I mean that Fury Dame Cela●no So dire a Monster ne'er was seen ho Then came the Flock and set a fluttering A Clawing Stinking and a Sputtering Drove the poor Trojans from their places All squirting in their Eyes and Faces Could Hercules the Giant take as Much Vengeance as he pleased of Cacus Altho' his Cows recover'd were soon And had no Violence done their Person And I forsooth that can the Bar throw Drive Coach or Shine or shoot an Arrow Break a new Horse-shooe crack a new Rope Or dry a Stall and common Shore up With e'er a Hercules in Europe Must be affronted and upon pissed Pray answer me on what acconp is' t I was induced to recede a little from strict Orthography in the last Line meerly out of Pity to the Ryme which would evidently have been in a miserable Condition if I had suffer'd either Ly REASON or even 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 ACCOUNT to get into the Penultimate Place which they both offer'd to supply but were both rejected tho' otherwise very worthy as not being agreeable to the Society The Verse and I are greatly and equally obliged to Syncope the Amputatrix as well as to some other Reformers of Modes and Superfluities who were extreamly ready and willing to come into Assistance in the present Case according to their usual Good-nature and very compassionate Disposition upon all such Emergencies From these two Proofs out of Poetry together with the Prose Arguments that preceded them it seems to be a very Rational Inference that of all Times Ages or Siecles those deserve the highest Renown as indeed they are allow'd to be beyond Comparison the best which neither Are Have been or Will be Present Have we not an illustrious Instance of this in the Saturnian or Golden-Age truly so called had so pernicious a Metal been consistent with the Happiness of those Blessed Days and have we 〈◊〉 another more illustrious in the Millennium at Ierusalem What more Peaceful and Innocent than the one What more Devout and Contemplative than the other And then if we enquire of our own Country in particular does not Great Britain confess that the Days now current are vile worthless and illaudable nor any way comparable for Blessedness to the precious Reign of that most gracious and magnificent Princess Quee● Dick Agreeably to this and no doubt upon the same Principles has the Sage St. E●remont determined concerning naked Goddesses and young Lancashire Witches that the Nymph which Finds her self 〈◊〉 where is VASTLY a fine● Creature than any that can be Found in Her Se● and must upon every Account carry the Golden Apple from all Her Fellows We likewise all know for certain 〈◊〉 least all that are Unprejudic'd will agree that Empedocles's Epick Poem is a 〈◊〉 Diviner Piece than either of Homer's 〈◊〉 Lucretius's Aeneis must also be owned infinitely Preferable to Virgil's the Truth of this may be put beyond Dispute by one plain Reason viz. That Virgil 〈◊〉 actually written an Aeneis or a certain Book of long Verses beginning with Ille Ego and Homer also is judged 〈◊〉 have made his own Epick Poems whereas the other Gentleman has writ 〈◊〉 and as for Lucretius's Twel●● Books of Aeneis See the Dissertation upon Phalaris's Epistles they neve● were in Rerum Naturâ By Parity of Reason has the Wisdom of the Ancients declar'd and pronounc'd it for a Maxim of most indisputable Truth Melius non nasci That of all Persons in the whole World none are in such a desirable Condition and happy Circumstances none so much to be envy'd or in so great Favour with Fate and all the Stars as those innocent Strangers that never knew the Misfortune of being Born and therefore as in Charity we ought to believe had no way deserv'd to be sentenc'd to that Execution or to have the Penalty of Life inflicted upon them Now does not all Philosophy with one Voice proclaim the Reasonableness of the fore-said Maxim for does it not assure us that Vtopia is a finer Region to dwell in than any other whatever not in this Terraqueous Globe only but even in either Hemisphere of that other in the Moon These Reflections may show us how justly the Religion and Virtue of Oliver C l the Vertue Loyalty and Merits of the Loyalty Merits and Poetry of have been so highly celebrated by Mr. W r Mr. S Mr. A c. for what can give to a Man's Virtue Loyalty and Poetry or Merits of any kind so eminent an Advantage what can make them so Worthy of being highly celebrated as that singular and characterizing Property of having no Existence The Life and Exploits of SANCHO PANSA After his Master's Decease AS the supreme Temporal Perfection is not found in any Times but those which neither Are have Been no● shall Be at all so is the second Honour very justly ascribed to those which although they do not come up to the same Perfection of Not-being with the other yet keep however the greatest Distance from the Moment in Being Now namely at my present Writing or you present Reading whenever that happen even tho' at a Thousand years Interval There is in Nature a parallel Case that may illustrate this Philosophy 'T is not imaginable the nice and strict Analogy between the Doctrines of Time and of Place can possibly have escap'd the Observation of so discerning a Genius as my Reader You see therefore
with great Appearance of Reason For who but ravenous Animals that came From th' Ideal Wolf of Wolfingam could ever have proved so Redoubtable in the Hesperian Fleecing Office See Ovid. Met. 7. Were we at leisure to enumerate all Surmises and Allegations there would be thrice as many Savages found to claim Kindred with Whezius and Querpillo as Cities contended for Homer or Religions for Mr. Bays † This last Paragraph was written of late Days See the Rehearsal and T. Brown's Dialogues But in this there is a Disparity that those Animals are all certainly a-kin to these Ramnusides in some or other Degree whereas Homer might possibly be born in the Country and Mr. Bays might possibly be of the same Lay-Religion with Smith or Iohnon or Ramnusides themselves Concerning my Pedigree and the present War I know not whether I may expect Thanks for my Discovery of a new World See Dr. Bently's Dissertat for I am resolved to stand it out that 't is entirely my own Discovery tho' the thing was long since discovered by my Predecessors Therefore We the Author of this Theory in our own Name and Person pronounce 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 and challenge Mankind to appear and do us Homage for the new Province put into their Hands We may fairly presume that a New-found World so much more Perfect Fertile and Delightful than the Old should reflect no little Glory upon our Age and upon our selves the Discoverer Let me add that we who boast the Happiness of our Birth from this Noble Island and our Descent from the Ancient Britons are able so clearly to make out our Country's Title that there is great Probability no other Nation will set up any Pretensions against our Propriety and peaceable Enjoyment for the King of France himself discovers no Inclination to quarrel with us about any part of the Ideal World Concerning my impartial Distribution of the Preferments in my Gift THERE are 't is true several Honourary Dignities now vacant and several large Countries that have neither Names nor Governours yet assign'd them Finding these unoccupied I have an indisputable Right to confer them on whom I please producing for Precedents those late Discoverers that disposed of all the finest Dominions in the Moon by an Arbitrary Nomination There is a Province peculiarly remarkable for a People of great Loyalty for Godfathers to which I have provided two noble Brothers the Joy and Glory of Ancient Rome who have freely bestow'd upon it the illustrious Name of Gracchia In this Laudable Canton purely to gain my Reader 's good Will I do constitute and appoint for Lord Lieutenant any one he shall please to recommend Many a good Title have I granted away either upon the Application of a Purse dexterously transferr'd or in Recompence for Passive Obedience at Baggamon Many a one have I parted with freely for the sake of Old Acquaintance or the Old Cause to Persons of Prime Quality and not a few also to my Inferiour Friends The in Consideration of the Great Services he did to Me and my Family during our unhappy Rupture with the late Grand Seignior I have elected King of Bubleria and New Formosa and when ever the Arch-Bishoprick or Dutchy of Puntillonia shall Fall being a Tatter'd Superbe Im s and August Oscitancy I am very willing to entail it upon any Branch of the House of or or or or The other especially the European Monarchs shall have no reason to complain of any unequal Favour or the least Neglect of any one's Merit for having observed that in making their Court they have carefully avoided all those Squablings and Sinister Practices that are usual among Competitors I have determined that they shall all have their Shares in my Bounty and be promoted each to such Posts and Offices as he shall be found best qualified for To make these Honours the more Honourable and Illustrate the Noble List I have faithfully enrolled my self erecting my Pillars on a certain Hesperian Promontory that is to rejoyce in the Denomination of Gabriel Iohannes and because some of my select Favourites whom I admit to a great Degree of Familiarity have got a Custom at merry Seasons to Salute me by the Name of Timothy that I might deal impartially between both my Appellations which are equally dear to me I have appointed one of the most con●iderable Islands in New Vtopia to go by the Name of TIMLAND A CHAPTER In Imitation of and SomeBody else that shall be Nameless I am not a Person of the same Humour and Principles with your Ordinary Preface-Authors to fill my Worthy Reader with high Expectations of what he is invited to and then put him off with a Flat and Beggarly Entertainment 'T is well known that I made Promise some few Hours ago when we first met to be at extraordinary Expence for providing him a Treat in some Measure suitable to His great Quality And now upon the nicest Review of all that has been set before him I cannot but bless my Good Genius that every thing has succeeded so well and pleased him in so extraordinary a manner 'T is a mighty Satisfaction to reflect upon my Happy Performance to find that the most sharp-sighted Philosopher can never descry the least Flaw in my Theory See Theory of the Earth nor charge me with an ill●grounded Position Inconsequent Deduction or the least Glimpse of Obscurity to assure my self that the most Captious and Cynical Critick● can spy out no Failure in the Composition the whole being compiled with so natural a Coherency of its Parts and enriched with such Delicate Sentiments Surprising Turns Ravishing Antitheses and these all adorned with the most lively Beauty of the Brightest Phrase and the Quaintest Harmony of most Elaborate Cadence Of my notable Meekness in taking Advice Of judicious Advisers Dr. B y's Head my own Pillow and some other Matters no less considerable AS to the few Pages that are still behind you must excuse me if I suffer my Pen to run a little more at Random Thus I shall greatly ease my self by relaxing that Intention of thought which is a Posture too wearisom for Human Mind to be long held in And this I take to be the properest Season for taking out my Freedom and entring upon the said Enlargement for which you shall have my Reason immediately Be it known then that after long consulting my Sagacious Pillow and my Learned Friend Dr. B y I have at last come to a Resolution that the concluding Word of this Paragraph shall be accounted the End of my Preface so long as my Book and this Universal Frame of Things shall continue in Being and I do hereby charge and command all dutiful Readers and other Loving Persons wheresoever dispersed throughout the Face of the habitable Globe that they so acknowledge and respect it accordingly Now this being declared 't is certain I shall drop some of my chief Readers the next Moment being Persons that fall