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A14659
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A manifest detection of the moste vyle and detestable vse of diceplay, and other practises lyke the same a myrrour very necessary for all yonge gentilmen [and] others sodenly enabled by worldly abu[n]dace [sic], to loke in. Newly set forth for their behoufe.
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Walker, Gilbert, attributed name.
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1555
(1555)
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STC 24961; ESTC S121809
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23,976
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66
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iiii persoÌ„s at the least eche of them to play a loÌ„g seueral part by him selfe The firste is the taker vp of a skilful man in all things who hath by loÌ„g trauill cunnid with oute the boke a. C. resoÌ„s to insimate him selfe into a maÌ„s acquayntaunce Talke of matters in law and he hath plenty of casis at his fingers ends yâ— he hath sene tried rewlid in euery of the kinges courtes Speke of grasyng and husbandry no man knoweth mo shires then he no maÌ„ knoweth better where to rayse a gayn how the abusis ouerture of pricis might bee redressed Finally enter into what discorse of things they liâ—t were it into a browm mans facultie hee knoweth what gaine they haue for old boots shoes wheÌ„ce their gain commeth yea it shall escape him hard but that ere your talk break of he wil be your cuntry man at least peraduenture either of kinne or aly or some soule siâ— vnto you if your reach surmouÌ„t not his too far In case he bring to passe that ye be glad of his acquaintance and content with his company playd is the cheef of his part and he gyueth place to the principall player the barnard neuerthelesse he lightly hath in his company a man of more worship theÌ„ himself yâ— hath the countenance of a possessioner of land and he is called the verser And though it be a very hard thing to be a perfite taker vp and as it were a man vniuersally practised in all accidentes of a mans life yit doth the Barnard go so farre beyond him in cunning as doth the suns somer brightnes exceede the glimmering light of the winter sterres This bodyes most comon practise is to come stuÌ„bling into your company like some rich farmor of the cuntry a stranger to you al that had bin at some market town there abouts bying and selling there tipled so much Malmsy that he had neuer a redy word in his mouth is so careles for his money that out he throweth an hundreth or ii of old aungels vpoÌ„ the bordes ende and standyng some what a loofe calleth for a pot of ale and sayeth masters I am some what bold with you I pray you be not agreuid that I drinke my drinke by you and minister such idel droÌ„ken talke that the verset who couÌ„terfeatith the geÌ„ tilman coÌ„meth stoutly and sittes at your elbowe praing you to call him neare too laugh at his folly betwene theÌ„ ii yâ— matter shal be so workmaÌ„ly coÌ„ueied so sinely arguid yâ— out coÌ„ith a pair of old cardes wherat yâ— barnarde teacheth yâ— verser a newe game yâ— he supposeth coste him ii potts of ale for yâ— lerning not past aÌ„ hour or ii before The first wager is drink the next ii pence or a grote lastli to make yâ— tale shorte they vse yâ— matter so yâ— he that hath lxxx yeres of his backe and neuer played for a grote in his life cannot refuse to be the verseres halfe coÌ„sequeÌ„tly at one cutting of the Cardes to louse all they play for be it an C. li. and if perhap pes when the money is lost the cosin begins to smoke and sweare that the dronken knaue shal not get his money so theÌ„ standeth the rubber at the dore and draweth his swerd and picketh a quarel to his owne shadow yf he lacke an osteler or a tapester or some other to fall out with al. That whiles the strete company ga ther to the fray as the maner is the barnard steales away with all the stuffe pickes him to one blinde tauerne or other such as before is appointed among theÌ„ ther abidith the coÌ„ming of his companions to make an equall porcion of the gain wheÌ„soeuer these shiftes may not take place theÌ„ lede they yâ— cosin to yâ— gase of an enterlude or the beare baytyng at paris gardeÌ„ or some other place of throÌ„g where by fyne fingered Fegge boye a grounded disciple of Iames Elis picked shal be his purse and his money lost in a moment or els thei run to the last refuge of all and by a knot of lusty companions of the hâ—gh law not only shake the harm lesse body out of all his clothes but bind him or bob him to bote that lesse had bin his harm to haue stouped low at the first and so to haue stopped their greedy mouthes then to saue himselfe so long and in the end to bee fleesed as bare as a new shorne shepe and perchaunce so farr from his freends that he shal be forced to trip on his ten toâ—s homeward for lacke of a hackney to ryde on and beg for hys charges by the way R. Now speake ye indeed of a redy way to thrift but it hath an yll fauoured successe many times M. I wot what you meane you thinke they come home by Tiburne or S. Thomas of Watrings and so they do in dede but nothing â—o sone as a man wold suppose they be but pety figgers and vnlessoned laddes that haue such redy passage to yâ— gallowes The old theues go thorow with their vsies wel xx or xxx yeres together be seldome taken or tainted specially yâ— figge bodies yâ— haue a goodly corporacioÌ„ for the relefe Their craft of all others requireth most slyght and hath a meruelus plenty of terms strange language and therfore no man can attayne to bee a workmaÌ„ therat til he haue had a good time of scoling and by that meanes they do not only know eache other well but they be subiecte to an order suche as the elders shal prescribe No man so sturdy to practise his feate but in the place apoynted nor for any cause once to put his fote in an others walke Some ii or iii. hath Pauls church in charge other hath west minister hâ—ule in terme tyme. Diuerse chepesyde with the flesh and fish shambles some the borough 〈◊〉 some the court part folow marketts fayres in the country with pedlers footepackes and generally to all places of assembâ—y Some of them are certeinly pointed as it were by their wardens to kepe yâ— hauÌ„t with comission but a shorte whyle and too enterchaunge their places as order shal be made to auoyde suspicion By occasion wherof when soeuer any stroke is workemanly striken though it were at new castel the rest of yâ— Fygge boyes that keapes residente in London come forth with pronosticate by whome the worthi feate was wrought one great prouisioÌ„ they haue that is a soueren salue at all times of nede a tresurer thei chuse in som blind corner a trusty secret frende That wheÌ„soeuer ther coÌ„meth any Iuels plate or such geare to their share the present sale therof might chaunce to discouer the matter the same els committed inâ—o his hands in pledge as it wer of money lent he taketh a byll of sale in default of repayment as if all thinges were done by good fayth and playne dealing So that whensoeuer
easily xx handes together play al vpoÌ„ assuraunce when to win or lose Other helps I haue hard of besides as to set yâ— cosin vpon the bench with a great looking glasse behinde him on the wall wherin the chetor might alwais see what cards were in his hand Somtimes they work by signes made by some of the lokers on Wherefore me thynkes this amonge the rest proceded of a fine inâ—encion A gamster after he had bin oftentunes bitten among yâ— chetors after much losse grew very suspicious in his play that he could not suffer ani of the sitters by to be priuy to his game for this the chetors deuised a new shift A woman should sit sowing besides him by the shift or slow drawing hir needell giue a token to the chetor what was the cosins game so that a few examples in sted of infinit that might be rehearsed this one vniuersall conclusion may be gathered that giue you to play yeld your self to losse R. I feele well that if a man happen to put his money in hasarde the ods is great that he shall rise a loser but many men are so continent of their hands that nothing can cause them to put ought in aduenture some again vnskilful yâ— lack of running forceth them to forbeare M. I graunt you wel both But neuertheles I neuer yet saw man so hard to bee vanquâ—shed but they would make him stoupe at one law or other And for that purpose their first trauel is after yâ— they haue takeÌ„ vp yâ— cosin made him somwhat sweat to seke by al means thei can to vnderstand his nature and whervnto hee is inclined If they find yâ— he taketh pleasure in the coÌ„pany of femals then seke they to strike him at the sacking law And take this alwais for a maxime yâ— al the bauds in a coÌ„trey be of yâ— chetors familiar acquaintaunce Therfore it shal not be hard at al times to prouid for this amorus knight a lewed lecherous lady to kepe him louing coÌ„pany TheÌ„ fal they to banketing to minstrels masking and much is the cost that the sily cosin shal be at in Iewels apparell and otherwise he shal not ones get a grauÌ„t to haue scarsly a licke at this dainty ladiys lappes And euer among she layeth in this reason For hir sake to put his xx or xl crowsau in aduenture ye wot not saith she what may be a womans lucke If he refuse it lord how vnkindly she taketh the mater cannot be recoÌ„siled with lesse then a gown or a kâ—rtyl of sylk which coÌ„menly is a reward vnto hir by knap of the case and the cut throtes his complites to whom the matter is put in daying Ye and the more is if haply they perceiue yâ— he estemed not brouâ—id ware but is enamored with virginitie they haue a fine cast wtin an houres warning too make Iohn syluâ—rpin as good a mayde as if she had neÌ„uer come at stewes nor openid to any man hir quiuer The mistery thereof ye sâ—all vnderstande by this my tale which I my selfe sawe put in experience A young roisterly gentylman desyring a mayden make to content his wanton lust resorted to a baude and promised her good wages to prouide him a maide against yâ— next day he declared vnto hir yâ— he toke more plesure in virginitie then beuty but if both came together yâ— pleasure was much the more thankefull her reward shuld be the better This mother baud vndertoke to serue his turne according to his desire hauing at home a well paynted manerly harlot as good a maid as fletchers mare that bare three great foles went in the morning to the Apothecaries for halfe a pynt of swete water yâ— coÌ„monly is called Surfulyng water or Clynkerdeuice on the way homeward turned into a noble mans house to visite his coke an old acquaintance of hirs vnneth had she set hir â—ete within the kitchin set downe hir glasse the more hansomely to warme hir afore the rauÌ„ge but anone the Coke had taken hir in his armes and whyles they wrastled more for maners sake of yâ— light then for any sqemishe besines had she bene behinde the dore Down fel the glas spilt was the water out alas ê™ the womaÌ„ quiet your selfe qd yâ— coke let vs go into the buttry to brekefast I will by the a newe glas pay for the filling Away they weÌ„t out of the kitchin the boye that turned a couple of spits deliting with the sauor of the water let first one spite stand after another always with one hande taking vp the water as it dropped froÌ„ yâ— bord by him washed his eyes his mouth all his face withall Sone after yâ— this likor was with the heat of yeâ—ier dried soked vp in the boies face down came the coke again into the kitchin finding the breste of the capon all burnt for lacke of turning caught vp a great basting stycke to beate the turnspytte happly casting a sower loke vpon him espyed the boyes mouth eyes drawn so togither closid that nether had he left an eye to loke wtall scarsly myght ye turne your lyttell fynger in his mouth The cooke abashed with the soden chance â—anne about the house half out of his wit and cried the kitcheÌ„ boy is takeÌ„ he caÌ„ nether se nor speke so the pore boy with his starched face coÌ„tinewed more then halfe an houre a woderyng stocke to all the house tyl a man of experieÌ„ce bad bath his face with hot fat beâ— broth wherby forth with he was resto red to as wide a mouth as opeÌ„ eies as he had before â–ª R. A good miracle soone wrought If maydes be so easy to make no meruel it is we haue such store in LoÌ„doÌ„ But forth I pray you with your purpose when whoredome hath no place what other shifts haue they to raise ther thrifte vpon â–ª M. a. C. mo then I can reherse but most comenly one of these that folow If it be winter season when masking is most in vsâ— then missing of theyr chept helps they spare not for cost of the derer Therfore first do they hyer in one place or other a sute of ryghte maskinge aparel and after inuites diuers gestes to a supper all such as be ther of estimacion to giue theÌ„ credit by their acquaintance or such as they thinke will be liberall to hazard some thing in a mumchance by which meanes they assure theÌ„selues at yâ— least to haue the supper schot free Perchaunce to win xx li. aboute And how soeuer the coÌ„men people esteme the thing I am cleane out of dout yâ— the more halfe of your gay maskes in LoÌ„don ar groundid vpoÌ„ such cheting craftes and tend on ly yâ— pouling robbing of the kinges subiectes An other ioyly shift for the subtyle inuencâ—oÌ„ and finenes of wit excedeth far al the rest is the barnardes law Which to be exactly practised asketh