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A07978
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Totenham Court A pleasant comedie: acted in the yeare MDCXXXIII. At the private house in Salisbury-Court. The author Thomas Nabbes.
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Nabbes, Thomas, 1605?-1645?
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1638
(1638)
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STC 18344; ESTC S113041
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36,725
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80
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worke of man prefer's not names Of auncestors She sometimes formes a piece For admiration from the basest earth That holds a soule and to a Beggars issue Gives those perfections make a beauty up When purer molds po'ish'd and g'oss'd with titles Honours and wealth bestow upon their bloods Deform'd impressions objects onely fit For sport or pitty Geo. Yet never can the mixture Of gold with clay make any transformation Of that base matter into purer metall Fran. The Chymistry of Love can surely doe it Wedlocke conferres all honour that 's a husbands Vpon his wife Geor. And therefore you will marry A milke wench one that 's drudge unto necessitie 'T would be a credit to that long continuance Of noble matches which your anncestors Have link'd to the chaine of their owne bloods To make the series of their Families Spread in so many glorious divisions Come let my counsell guide these passive Fires To flame aright and send their Pyramids More upwards Let the grosser stuffe that feeds them By an inversion choake them From advice Men must choose wives not passion Fran. She is faire Upon her person all the graces waite And dance in rings about her Her bright eye Is Loves chiefe mansion where he keepes his Court Envy not faire ones if my fancie doth Give all your dues to her save onely those Which your defects supply from wanton art Her white and red she borrow's not from any Cosmetique drugs nor puzzles the invention Of learn'd practitioners for oyle of Talxe To blanch an Ethiops skin Lillies and Roses Are figures fitting common beauties hers Wants a comparison but its proper selfe Geo. You swell her praise too high so meane a subject fits not these raptures Fran. Shee 's a subject George For larger volumes then invention Yet ever fill'd with flattering hyperboles The very thought of her hath strain'd my heart-strings Vp to a pitch of joy whose musicke makes My spleene dance lusty measures Geo. If she be So rare a piece her low condition Makes me suspitious shee 's some common wanton Lurks in that maske for safety Fran. Did not friendship Restrain 't I should be angry nay more punish So great a sin against her innocence I have laid all the baits that might entice Apt inclination to sweet wickednesse But could not catch her that way She hath shund them With witty scorne and such imperious checks Have made me blush at my intentions soulenesse Which now is cleer'd with noble resolution To give my hot desires their satisfaction In faire embraces such as the reverence Of lawfull Wedlock sweetens Geor. Vertuous policie Kill reputation that you may preserve A little better conscience Any judgement Would make a faire construction of my life That surfets in delights and playes the Epicure In all varietie and choyce of pleasures Sooner then of thy act Where ils doe want A faire excuse as thine doth they are doubled Fran. When thou hast seene her thou wilt soone acknowledge In what a misty error thy invectives Have lost themselves Geo. Nay rather hide her from me She may raise motions and if I should rivall thee I must be serv'd nothing was ere devis'd To fright libidinous nature from it's pronenesse That can restraine me Fran. Shal't not make me jealous Her soule is guarded with so many vertues Temptations cannot better it and i' th' way Of noble love though yet she never sung The musicke of consent I dare preferre My selfe the first accepted Geor. Still be confident The second Scoene To them CHANGLOVE STITCHVVELL and his WIFE But who comes yonder Fran. Some Citie loving couple Geor. What 's that Gallant Fran. Surely 't is Will Changelove The Proteus of affection one that vary's As many shapes of love as there are objects But what that shee-thing is I doe not know Geo. She seems a handsome piece That opportunity Would play the Bawd a little Fran. You 'd be nibbling Changlove is my acquaintance If they come this way as 't is most likely Tottenham-Court 's the end of their early walking I 'le be thy introduction Let 's walke softly Geor. Whilst I doe ruminate some policie Stitch. Besides the recreation Sir t is healthful Chang. Indeed sloth duls the spirits activenesse And too much sleeping blunts the senses quicknesse Though some be very needfull their affects Are the preservers of their instruments I love early rising Mris. St. But me thinks a nap in a morning's good Cha. True Mris. Stitchwell when the braine hath purg'd It selfe of grosser fumes the fancy yeeld's Such solace to the inward waking sense In pleasant dreames that I have often wish'd Those shadowes reall which they have presented Or their continuance to eternitie Indeed I love to sleepe in the morning Stitch. But stirring and exercise I say Wife I would you would vse it in bed then Stitch. I tell you Mr. Changelove though I am a Taylor I keepe servants that are stout knaves I love them well and they looke well to my businesse On holydayes I give them leave to use exercise Wife Yes husband your finisher is a pretty a fellow as ever did tradesman or his wife service He pitcheth the barr and throws the stone it doth me good to think of it Stitch. I have a Cornish-Lad that wrastles well and hath brought home Rabbets every Bartholmew-tide these five yeares At stoole ball I have a North-west strippling shall deale with ever a boy in the strand Change Now you speake of a ball I would wee had one here t is a commendable exercise the great Physitian Galen wrote a booke de exercitations parvae pilae Wife What 's that pray sir Change Concerning the exercise of the little ball Wife It seems great Physitians will busie themselves about small things but they are not of my mind Geor. How lik'st the project Fran. As the end proves it howsoever it promiseth fairely Geo. They are arriv'd let us prepare our selves Fran. Mr. Changelove a happy day follow this pleasant morning Change Worthy friend I returne your salute with double wishes pray know this Gentleman and his bed-fellow Fran. The day must needs bee fortunate that begins with such faire Omens Wife I pray sir why doth that Gentleman shun your company I hope we fright him not It had beene manners to salute me Fran. He alwayes doth that by Attourney Mistris Wife Then I must pay the fees Fran. The truth is he is a great woman-hater Wife Now out upon him I thought he was gelt hee is so fat Beast that I was to be so unmercifull to a dumb thing I had a dog serv'd so for the same purpose Fran. It is a disposition in his will Not a defect of power Stitch. How said you sir cannot that Gentleman indure women Fran. Hardly their sight at distance 'T is affliction Vnto his very soule to heare their vertues Discourst unlesse in scorne Chang. A strange unmanly humour I love not that Wife May all the curses our injur'd sexe can study fall upon him
You seeme a Gentleman Worth And am one that was giv'n me in my birth If not my sword hath purchas'd it Cice. With leave I would relate the accident to satisfie Your curious love which makes you doubt that ill Ne're stain'd a thought in her and for my selfe My life 's untouch'd by envy Keep Gentle sir Let my perswasion worke upon your temper And make it pliable to forgoe all jealousie And misconstruction Something is reserv'd In mine owne knowledge shall disperse those clouds That muffle error in their misty rowles And makes it blind in all things but in mischiefe Sam. If Bellamie be vertuous shee 's my Sister And shall not lose that interest Keep Now Ciceley 'T is time that you disrobe Cice. By no meanes father My part 's not ended yet Bella. Please her accept Th' exchange as my thanks gift since to her care And full discretion I must attribute My safety Something 's now in action By her begun from an ingenious practice Will make the end more comicke Cice. But 't will turne To a sad Tragedy if I enjoy not This worthy gentleman Keep A larger roome Were more convenient Please you sir the house Is well accommodated Worth What 's more to be expected Can crosse or crowne our loves with new events Exe. Slip. Goe your wayes and quarrell no more lest I bee stickler with this terrible Embleme of a Butchers cruelty Exit The seventh Scoene Enter CHANGELOVE WIFE STITCHVVELI in a Chayre asleepe Wife The effects of drinking Mr. Changelove his head should be troubled with something else were he rul'd by me But he cares not for my counsell nor mee I could eene curse mine own kindnes that am ready still to make more of him then he doth of me Chang. Why doe you not then Wife What sir I warrant you meane make him a Cuckold Chan. That 's a grosse construction Give a friend leave to do you a pleasure or so The truth is Mistris I love you Wife You were ever kind Mr. Changelove Chang. And would your freenes give me leave t' enjoy Those sweets although forbidden 't would be a happines 'Bove my desire Be assur'd my secrecie Is firme as night and locks Wif. Secresie Mr. Changelove I would have you know I will be open to all the world I 'le doe no more in the darke then in this very place were my husbands eyes open Chan. Here then He sleeps securely never dreaming Of any foreheads arming Wife Fie Mr. Changelove you are such a tempter Pray set heare many a woman would not hold out so long Chang. Consent then sweet wee 'l to it Stitch. Ware hornes there Chan. Mischiefe what noise hath wak't him Wife An infirmitie hee hath to talke in 's sleepe Nay I assure you hee will rise sometimes and doe the office of a waking man in his dreame and not know of it in the Morning Stitch. Rome for one of the headmen in his Parish a monster of his wifes making Wife Wicked man hee dreames now that I would make him a Cuckold Change Send it be no counterfeit Stitch. And have I tane you sir Lancelot would you be billing with my Guinever Puls Changelove by the eares Chang. Helpe me Mistris Stitchwell Wife Take it patiently Sir his fit will bee over presently Stit. For this attempt King Arthur doth here degrade thee from a Knight of his round Table to bee a Squire of his Wifes body So conduct me to her bed where I will beget a race of warriours shall cage thy great Turkship againe and restore Constantinople to the Emperour Chan. You mistake oh My Perriwig is not a Turbant Stit. Peace follows victory let us now to rest Wife Pray sir forgive him I dare undertake hee 'l be sorry for it when he wakes If any thing I can may make amends Chan. Prove his dreame true When the smart 's over I shall forget it Enter Tapster Tap. A quest of inquiry is sent all the house over to looke you Mistris The gentlewomans maid was in a swound they wanted your assistance Stit. Who wants assistance who breaks the Kings peace fetch me my Constables staffe Chan. Hee 'l dreame againe had I best stay Wife Now drunkard are you recoverd yet Stit. Wife and Mr. Changelove where 's the company Wife Gone being weary of such a sot as you make your selfe Pretend a walke for health and recreation to bee drunke so early I had done well to have served you in your kinde here were gentlemen enough that would have brought me home and some not farre off that used me kindly whilst you snorted to fright fleas and dream't perhaps some wickednesse of me Stit. Prethee peace sweet wife I le mend all Wife I promise you you shall never mend me till you doe better your selfe Stit. I 'le buy my pardon for it with a new gowne and a journey into the Countrey next vacation Wife You know Iohn I am easie to be wrought upon Tap. Will you discharge the reckoning Mr. Changelove Chang. Not willingly I doe not love it No revenge upon this dreaming tyrant over unpaid for gallantry A protection to defraud him is long since provided What is your reckoning Robin Tap. Nine and three-pence sir Chang. The particulars Tapst. Cakes two shillings Ale as much A quart of mortify'd Claret eight pence Stewd pruins twelve pence Change They were deare Tap. Truely they cost a penny the pound of the one-handed Coster-monger out of his wifes fish-basket A quart of Creame twelve-pence Chang. That 's too excessive Tapst. Not if you consider how many Carriers egges miscarried in the making of it and the charge of Ising-glasse and other ingredients to cremifie the soure milke Chang. All this is but a Noble Tap. Pray marke me sir I 'le make it more Twelve-pence Sugar You had bread sir Stit. And we had drinke sir Tap. 'T is granted sir A pound of sausedges and other things nine shillings and three-pence Our Barre never erres Chang. I 'le talke with your Mistris You know my meaning Robin steales away Wife Oh the extortion of Tottenham-Court Stit. No matter Wife kinde Mr. Changelove will pay for all Ha! where is hee Tap. Gone Sir Stit. Then give me my Cloake Tap. The reckoning first Sir Stit. How must Taylors pay Gallants reckonings Wife Sure husband he intends this a satisfaction for his beating Stit. Have you such tricks No great matter 't is but adding it to his bill in my debt-debt-booke and presently arresting him with a fat Martiallist Here sirrah Tap. Y' are welcome Sir Some profit comes from hence I have ore-reckon'd one and twenty-pence Exeunt Act. 5. Scoen. 1. Enter GEORGE and PORTER with the Trunck presently after them VNCLE SERVANT and TENANTS Porter A Heavy burthen I assure you Sir Geor. That 's strange a light Wench and feathers Por. You say true Sir 't is enough to break a mans back Geor. His mistake hits upon truth Rest thee Porter Oh this plots quaintnesse witty luxury How it acutes