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much_o my_o husband_n rejoice_v to_o hear_v he_o say_v so_o and_o he_o be_v so_o take_v with_o he_o that_o he_o give_v he_o both_o money_n and_o clothes_n there_o be_v a_o poor_a woman_n that_o use_v to_o sit_v with_o the_o rest_n of_o the_o poor_a at_o his_o servant_n table_n and_o he_o hear_v she_o have_v the_o report_n of_o a_o good_a woman_n he_o take_v she_o to_o his_o own_o table_n and_o use_v she_o with_o much_o respect_n he_o have_v such_o humble_a thought_n of_o himself_o that_o for_o some_o time_n he_o will_v not_o allow_v himself_o decent_a
burial_n but_o afterward_o he_o consent_v to_o it_o and_o desire_v his_o neighbour_n may_v accompany_v he_o to_o his_o grave_n he_o often_o desire_v i_o to_o be_v bury_v in_o the_o vault_n by_o he_o i_o have_v something_o in_o memory_n of_o a_o dream_n that_o he_o tell_v i_o of_o when_o he_o wake_v a_o little_a before_o his_o last_o sickness_n he_o dream_v that_o the_o day_n of_o judgement_n be_v come_v and_o the_o lord_n appear_v in_o the_o cloud_n and_o call_v the_o elect_n he_o be_v leave_v behind_o upon_o which_o be_v grievous_o afflict_v he_o pray_v earnest_o and_o the_o bless_a jesus_n look_v back_o and_o call_v he_o and_o he_o go_v with_o great_a joy_n and_o be_v receive_v into_o heaven_n with_o the_o rest_n of_o the_o elect._n he_o be_v full_a of_o fear_n as_o to_o his_o future_a condition_n while_o he_o be_v here_o but_o now_o i_o question_v not_o but_o he_o be_v receive_v into_o the_o joy_n of_o the_o lord_n he_o be_v a_o sickly_a man_n for_o many_o year_n trouble_v with_o convulsion_n fit_n and_o shortness_n of_o breathe_v which_o make_v he_o fear_v sudden_a death_n and_o pray_v daily_o against_o it_o but_o his_o last_o sickness_n be_v the_o yellow-jaundice_n with_o a_o very_a sore_a throat_n and_o a_o violent_a fever_n and_o though_o he_o be_v in_o very_o much_o pain_n he_o bear_v it_o with_o a_o great_a deal_n of_o patience_n speak_v comfortable_o to_o all_o about_o he_o so_o that_o they_o say_v they_o never_o be_v with_o any_o one_o that_o make_v a_o better_a end_n he_o be_v much_o in_o prayer_n i_o think_v i_o hear_v he_o say_v the_o lord_n prayer_n near_o twenty_o time_n in_o one_o day_n when_o he_o be_v so_o weak_a that_o he_o can_v hardly_o bring_v out_o his_o word_n he_o desire_v i_o not_o to_o be_v trouble_v and_o say_v god_n will_v provide_v for_o i_o and_o pray_v god_n to_o send_v we_o a_o happy_a meeting_n he_o often_o tell_v i_o his_o prayer_n for_o i_o be_v that_o god_n will_v bless_v i_o with_o the_o blessing_n of_o his_o right_a hand_n and_o of_o his_o left_a i_o can_v remember_v half_o the_o heavenly_a expression_n he_o have_v when_o mr._n benson_n the_o minister_n of_o our_o parish_n pray_v by_o he_o he_o say_v to_o i_o mr._n benson_n be_v a_o good_a man_n he_o speak_v so_o sweet_o when_o he_o speak_v of_o god_n he_o desire_v the_o bell_n may_v be_v ring_v and_o ask_v many_o time_n after_o it_o if_o it_o do_v not_o ring_v he_o depart_v this_o life_n on_o the_o 10_o the_o day_n of_o may_n 1678._o being_n friday_n the_o day_n after_o ascension_n and_o i_o hope_v he_o have_v receive_v the_o benefit_n of_o the_o precious_a passion_n and_o glorious_a resurrection_n and_o ascension_n of_o our_o dear_a lord_n and_o ever_o bless_a saviour_n jesus_n he_o have_v former_o desire_v i_o not_o to_o be_v by_o he_o when_o he_o be_v die_v lest_o see_v i_o shall_v make_v he_o unwilling_a to_o leave_v this_o world_n and_o lest_o i_o shall_v by_o any_o sudden_a passion_n disturb_v his_o soul_n depart_v but_o at_o last_o he_o very_o much_o call_v upon_o i_o not_o to_o leave_v he_o so_o i_o stay_v with_o he_o to_o the_o last_o and_o though_o my_o trouble_n be_v not_o to_o be_v express_v yet_o i_o thank_v god_n i_o do_v not_o in_o the_o least_o disturb_v he_o he_o endure_v much_o pain_n in_o his_o sickness_n but_o at_o last_o i_o can_v not_o perceive_v he_o have_v any_o but_o his_o breath_n grow_v short_a and_o short_a and_o so_o he_o go_v away_o without_o the_o least_o gasp_n or_o groan_v his_o thought_n and_o discourse_n be_v much_o of_o death_n long_o before_o he_o will_v say_v our_o life_n be_v but_o as_o a_o dream_n or_o the_o shadow_n of_o a_o dream_n and_o as_o a_o vapour_n and_o when_o he_o see_v any_o disturb_v for_o fear_n of_o loss_n in_o this_o world_n he_o will_v say_v none_o be_v ever_o undo_v till_o they_o come_v to_o hell_n he_o love_v much_o to_o dispute_v about_o religion_n but_o once_o be_v dispute_v against_o predestination_n and_o fear_v he_o have_v speak_v something_o irreverent_a he_o be_v extreme_o afflict_v i_o never_o see_v any_o one_o express_v more_o sorrow_n and_o write_v what_o i_o here_o set_v down_o and_o have_v under_o his_o own_o hand_n by_o i_o i_o do_v immediate_o strip_v myself_o of_o it_o and_o throw_v myself_o down_o before_o the_o throne_n of_o grace_n by_o which_o it_o have_v no_o propriety_n in_o i_o i_o do_v it_o whatever_o it_o be_v to_o vindicate_v god_n mercy_n i_o have_v commit_v my_o cause_n to_o god_n who_o know_v my_o thought_n and_o let_v he_o deal_v with_o i_o according_a to_o his_o infinite_a goodness_n and_o wisdom_n let_v satan_n do_v what_o he_o can_v against_o i_o i_o know_v my_o saviour_n be_v the_o captain_n of_o my_o salvation_n i_o have_v here_o endeavour_v to_o give_v what_o account_n i_o can_v of_o my_o dear_a husband_n life_n but_o i_o know_v i_o come_v very_o short_a of_o what_o may_v have_v be_v observe_v by_o one_o of_o a_o better_a memory_n that_o have_v be_v with_o he_o so_o much_o as_o myself_o i_o hope_v the_o christian_a reader_n into_o who_o hand_n these_o paper_n shall_v come_v will_v pardon_v all_o imperfection_n in_o the_o style_n or_o method_n and_o make_v the_o best_a use_n of_o what_o be_v so_o well_o design_v by_o the_o author_n the_o fulfil_n of_o who_o will_n in_o set_v forth_o his_o book_n and_o discharge_v my_o duty_n in_o clear_v he_o to_o the_o world_n be_v the_o only_a cause_n i_o venture_v to_o appear_v in_o print_n sarah_n freman_n i_o receive_v a_o letter_n from_o a_o very_a reverend_n divine_a that_o give_v this_o account_n of_o my_o dear_a husband_n which_o i_o write_v in_o his_o own_o word_n that_o he_o be_v in_o many_o respect_v the_o most_o remarkable_a instance_n of_o humility_n the_o great_a example_n of_o godly_a sorrow_n and_o the_o most_o admirable_a precedent_n of_o self-denial_n and_o sincere_a detestation_n of_o sin_n in_o himself_o and_o passionate_a care_n that_o it_o may_v not_o infect_v other_o which_o i_o have_v know_v and_o of_o this_o it_o please_v the_o alwise_a guider_n of_o all_o thing_n to_o make_v i_o a_o very_a heedful_a witness_n about_o 18_o year_n ago_o when_o i_o preach_v at_o the_o savoy_n for_o dr._n t._n f._n not_o many_o day_n after_o i_o be_v summon_v to_o wait_v on_o sir_n george_n freman_n a_o person_n then_o altogether_o unknown_a to_o i_o who_o he_o entertain_v with_o a_o most_o doleful_a tenderness_n of_o affection_n and_o with_o manly_a because_o christian_n shower_n of_o tear_n speak_v after_o this_o manner_n sir_n you_o be_v to_o i_o as_o i_o suppose_v i_o be_o to_o you_o a_o stranger_n i_o thank_v you_o for_o your_o sermon_n at_o the_o savoy_n where_o i_o be_v your_o auditor_n i_o do_v not_o think_v you_o aim_v at_o i_o but_o sure_o i_o be_o your_o discourse_n pierce_v my_o heart_n i_o can_v scarce_o think_v any_o one_o there_o beside_o concern_v i_o dare_v say_v none_o more_o than_o myself_o i_o be_o that_o miserable_a man_n who_o have_v not_o remember_v my_o creator_n in_o the_o day_n of_o my_o youth_n my_o text_n be_v eccles._n twelve_o 1._o and_o now_o what_o shall_v i_o do_v what_o shall_v i_o do_v give_v i_o your_o advice_n assist_v i_o with_o your_o prayer_n thus_o in_o one_o person_n perceive_v many_o bless_a mark_n of_o true_a penitent_n wound_v with_o saint_n to_o peter_n hearer_n who_o be_v prick_v to_o the_o heart_n act_v 2._o inquisitive_a with_o the_o baptist_n pious_a auditor_n s_o t_o luke_n 3_o vow_v amendment_n with_o david_n and_o command_v it_o in_o those_o under_o his_o care_n send_v to_o i_o as_o good_a josiah_n do_v to_o huldah_n the_o prophetess_n i_o do_v as_o soon_o as_o i_o have_v recover_v myself_o from_o that_o tumult_n of_o passion_n which_o a_o sight_n so_o unexpected_a do_v raise_v apply_v myself_o according_a to_o my_o poor_a ability_n with_o utmost_a compassion_n to_o aid_v the_o sorrowful_a patient_n of_o the_o almighty_a who_o be_v please_v after_o diverse_a week_n conference_n prayer_n and_o meditation_n on_o several_a text_n of_o scripture_n and_o such_o like_a 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