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book_n find_v holy_a scripture_n 3,248 5 5.4817 4 true
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ID Title Author Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication) STC Words Pages
A96727 The vertuous wife: or, the holy life of Mrs. Elizabth Walker, late wife of A. Walker, D.D. sometime Rector of Fyfield in Essex Giving a modest and short account of her exemplary piety and charity. Published for the glory of God, and provoking others to the like graces and vertues. With some useful papers and letters writ by her on several occasions. Walker, Anthony, d. 1692.; Walker, Elizabeth, 1623-1690. 1694 (1694) Wing W311A; ESTC R229717 136,489 315

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which_o nothing_o can_v be_v hide_v and_o as_o easy_o will_v detect_v it_o as_o earnest_o detest_v it_o and_o severe_o avenge_v it_o her_o modesty_n which_o you_o hear_v before_o she_o call_v the_o woman_n ornament_n be_v so_o undeflowred_a that_o she_o loathe_v in_o other_o what_o have_v the_o slight_a appearance_n of_o stain_v or_o tarnish_v that_o orient_a beauty_n and_o adorn_v comeliness_n and_o which_o she_o strive_v to_o plant_v in_o her_o daughter_n as_o the_o fair_a flower_n in_o that_o garden_n which_o she_o cultivate_v with_o her_o best_a industry_n and_o for_o herself_o i_o can_v and_o do_v give_v she_o this_o true_a testimony_n i_o never_o hear_v a_o word_n proceed_v from_o her_o mouth_n of_o unpure_a defile_n sound_n or_o sense_n or_o of_o least_o tendency_n to_o either_o her_o garb_n and_o dress_n her_o carriage_n and_o gesture_n and_o her_o whole_a conversation_n be_v all_o of_o a_o piece_n with_o her_o communication_n which_o be_v always_o savoury_a season_v with_o 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constitution_n but_o aware_a of_o it_o she_o double_v her_o guard_n to_o prevent_v a_o breach_n upon_o her_o weak_a side_n she_o have_v gather_v more_o than_o five_o page_n of_o apposite_a scripture_n which_o exhort_v to_o meekness_n of_o spirit_n as_o i_o touch_v before_o page_n 74._o the_o three_o of_o which_o be_v psal_n 18.23_o i_o be_v also_o upright_o before_o he_o and_o keep_v myself_o from_o my_o eniquity_n which_o i_o conclude_v she_o do_v upon_o that_o account_n because_o she_o find_v herself_o liable_a to_o be_v surprise_v by_o that_o infirmity_n of_o her_o natural_a temper_n hastiness_n the_o contrary_a to_o meekness_n those_o sin_n be_v most_o proper_o call_v our_o own_o which_o proceed_v from_o our_o constitution_n calling_n and_o prevail_a custom_n and_o the_o next_o be_v job_n 13.31_o if_o i_o do_v despise_v the_o cause_n of_o my_o manservant_n or_o my_o maid-servant_n when_o they_o contend_v with_o i_o which_o she_o set_v down_o to_o keep_v she_o from_o be_v angry_a without_o hear_v their_o excuse_n if_o they_o have_v any_o to_o extenuate_v a_o fault_n or_o not_o beyond_o proportion_n to_o it_o if_o they_o have_v none_o and_o many_o or_o her_o servant_n as_o well_o as_o myself_o can_v witness_v if_o she_o have_v exceed_v in_o her_o reproof_n or_o chide_v she_o will_v chide_v herself_o more_o than_o she_o have_v do_v they_o and_o pray_v they_o to_o forgive_v she_o so_o much_o more_o willing_a be_v she_o to_o bear_v shame_n than_o gild_n she_o proceed_v cease_v from_o anger_n and_o forsake_v wrath_n fret_v not_o thyself_o in_o any_o wise_a to_o do_v evil_a psal_n 37.18_o and_o next_o a_o froward_a heart_n shall_v depart_v from_o i_o but_o i_o shut_v the_o book_n or_o i_o shall_v with_o transcribe_v and_o remark_v fill_v a_o sheet_n and_o weary_a my_o reader_n she_o be_v a_o very_a discreet_a wise_a and_o prudent_a woman_n and_o of_o a_o good_a judgement_n she_o be_v indeed_o sometime_o pretty_a positive_a stiff_a tenation_n and_o adhesive_a to_o her_o sentiment_n which_o i_o have_v gentle_o reprove_v as_o be_v a_o little_a overweening_a and_o too_o well_o conceit_v of_o her_o own_o wisdom_n which_o i_o remember_v with_o great_a regret_n but_o clear_v she_o and_o confess_v my_o own_o error_n without_o any_o regret_a what_o i_o now_o do_v therein_o for_o i_o must_v acknowledge_v that_o the_o event_n for_o the_o most_o part_n prove_v she_o be_v in_o the_o right_n and_o persist_v not_o out_o of_o humour_n but_o because_o her_o opinion_n be_v well_o ground_v and_o fix_v upon_o good_a reason_n she_o be_v a_o excellent_a proficient_a in_o satisfy_v acquiescence_n and_o have_v learn_v the_o art_n of_o contentment_n to_o perfection_n she_o have_v attain_v to_o a_o ne_fw-fr plus_fw-la ultra_fw-la in_o the_o thing_n of_o this_o life_n she_o do_v not_o only_o not_o desire_n but_o be_v afraid_a of_o be_v great_a or_o rich_a in_o this_o world_n than_o god_n have_v vouchsafe_v to_o make_v we_o she_o choose_v to_o follow_v not_o to_o lead_v or_o dictate_v to_o the_o motion_n of_o divine_a providence_n and_o she_o know_v my_o mind_n so_o well_o she_o need_v not_o to_o do_v it_o when_o we_o be_v alone_o but_o she_o have_v often_o say_v before_o many_o witness_n what_o i_o be_o about_o to_o relate_v when_o many_o friend_n who_o know_v her_o humour_n will_v be_v say_v i_o will_v be_v short_o so_o or_o so_o prefer_v i_o suppose_v in_o merriment_n rather_o than_o that_o they_o real_o think_v so_o she_o will_v reply_v and_o entreat_v they_o to_o hold_v their_o peace_n say_v such_o discourse_n be_v very_o unacceptable_a to_o she_o and_o lest_o their_o vain_a breath_n shall_v infect_v i_o though_o i_o thank_v god_n who_o sacred_a name_n i_o will_v not_o use_v in_o vain_a i_o never_o find_v myself_o susceptive_a of_o that_o infection_n she_o will_v drop_v such_o prevent_a physic_n what_o can_v we_o desire_v that_o we_o want_v what_o have_v they_o who_o have_v so_o many_o preferment_n more_o than_o we_o but_o a_o great_a account_n to_o give_v at_o the_o day_n of_o judgement_n we_o have_v enough_o to_o answer_v all_o the_o end_n of_o necessity_n and_o decency_n and_o somewhat_o to_o spare_v for_o charity_n we_o know_v not_o what_o it_o be_v to_o be_v in_o strait_n and_o often_o lend_v when_o other_o who_o have_v so_o much_o more_o be_v force_v to_o borrow_v it_o be_v a_o low_a and_o easy_a thing_n in_o our_o circumstance_n to_o be_v content_a it_o be_v too_o cheap_a a_o return_n for_o our_o enjoyment_n it_o concern_v we_o to_o be_v high_o thankful_a the_o good_a lord_n make_v we_o so_o and_o therefore_o i_o pray_v find_v some_o other_o discourse_n and_o leave_v this_o idle_a and_o unwelcome_a twattle_v so_o free_o will_v she_o speak_v when_o they_o have_v teaze_v and_o warm_v she_o not_o to_o say_v vex_v she_o with_o their_o impertinent_a harrang_n and_o indeed_o she_o be_v very_o thankful_a what_o a_o sweet_a spirit_n of_o praise_n breath_n in_o all_o i_o have_v transcribe_v from_o her_o paper_n and_o she_o do_v true_o abound_v in_o this_o grace_n she_o have_v well_o learned_a the_o apostle_n lesson_n in_o all_o thing_n to_o give_v thanks_o she_o bless_v the_o lord_n at_o all_o time_n his_o praise_n be_v continual_o in_o her_o mouth_n she_o seldom_o enterprise_v any_o thing_n without_o prayer_n and_o as_o seldom_o finish_v it_o without_o praise_n comparative_o she_o esteem_v praise_n much_o more_o excellent_a than_o prayer_n not_o only_o as_o it_o be_v more_o like_o the_o employment_n of_o the_o holy_a angel_n and_o the_o spirit_n of_o just_a man_n make_v perfect_a but_o as_o it_o be_v less_o selfish_a and_o have_v a_o more_o immediate_a aspect_n upon_o god_n our_o own_o necessity_n constrain_v we_o to_o cry_v to_o god_n for_o relief_n and_o the_o worst_a man_n will_v pray_v yea_o and_o make_v vow_n when_o they_o be_v in_o fear_n but_o only_o good_a man_n will_v return_v to_o pay_v their_o acknowledgement_n when_o their_o turn_n be_v serve_v all_o the_o ten_o leper_n cry_v for_o mercy_n but_o where_o be_v the_o nine_o there_o be_v but_o one_o of_o they_o find_v to_o render_v thanks_o st._n gregory_n the_o great_a give_v this_o reason_n why_o of_o all_o the_o holy_a man_n of_o god_n mention_v in_o the_o sacred_a oracle_n david_n only_o be_v call_v the_o man_n after_o god_n own_o heart_n because_o he_o write_v the_o book_n of_o psalm_n those_o divine_a praise_n praise_n be_v so_o agreeable_a to_o the_o heart_n of_o god_n he_o that_o offer_v praise_n glorifi_v i_o that_o the_o man_n of_o praise_n be_v the_o man_n after_o god_n own_o heart_n and_o this_o good_a woman_n have_v leave_v this_o comfortable_a evidence_n and_o ground_n of_o hope_n behind_o she_o that_o she_o be_v go_v to_o the_o place_n where_o eternity_n will_v be_v spend_v in_o endless_a hallelujah_n
lady_n essex_n specot_n pag._n 234_o to_o pag._n 246_o another_o consolatory_a letter_n write_v to_o a_o good_a christian_a friend_n under_o trouble_n pag._n 246_o a_o account_n of_o the_o care_n she_o take_v of_o young_a scholar_n which_o come_v to_o live_v in_o my_o family_n pag._n 247._o as_o it_o shall_v be_v though_o misprinted_n pag._n 227._o two_o letter_n in_o part_n which_o she_o write_v to_o one_o of_o they_o to_o stir_v he_o up_o to_o faithfulness_n in_o his_o ministry_n pag._n 250_o a_o good_a letter_n to_o a_o country_n farmer_n who_o marry_v her_o kinswoman_n which_o i_o hope_v may_v be_v useful_a to_o all_o my_o plain_a parishioner_n pag._n 258_o a_o very_a large_a but_o excellent_a letter_n write_v to_o her_o dear_a grandchild_n about_o two_o month_n before_o she_o die_v which_o i_o hope_v may_v be_v very_o useful_a to_o young_a gentleman_n of_o the_o like_a age._n pag._n 270_o the_o conclusion_n pag._n 296_o it_o be_v not_o needful_a to_o run_v over_o the_o whole_a to_o amend_v the_o mis-printings_a which_o be_v not_o many_o nor_o great_a prayer_n for_o praise_n amnestry_n for_o amnesty_n revenerable_a for_o venerable_a glassock_n for_o glascock_n pag._n 258._o and_o a_o few_o like_a be_v all_o i_o remember_v and_o some_o mis-pointings_a the_o holy_a life_n of_o mrs_n elizabeth_n walker_n the_o introduction_n i_o be_o not_o so_o short_a sight_v as_o not_o to_o foresee_v the_o censure_n i_o may_v expose_v myself_o to_o by_o this_o undertake_n especial_o if_o it_o fall_v into_o the_o hand_n of_o such_o as_o be_v prone_a to_o make_v sinister_a interpretation_n of_o other_o man_n action_n and_o receive_v with_o the_o left_a hand_n what_o be_v most_o innocent_o offer_v with_o the_o right_n yet_o consider_v it_o will_v be_v very_o ill_o become_v that_o endear_a affection_n i_o always_o bear_v to_o her_o live_n and_o owe_v to_o her_o precious_a memory_n now_o god_n have_v bereave_v i_o of_o she_o to_o balk_v a_o duty_n and_o neglect_v a_o office_n which_o may_v be_v as_o useful_a to_o other_o as_o kind_a to_o she_o upon_o such_o fear_n i_o shall_v free_o run_v that_o hazard_n to_o perpetuate_v her_o memory_n with_o just_a honour_n and_o deserve_a praise_n but_o principal_o to_o glorify_v god_n for_o that_o abundant_a grace_n vouchsafe_v to_o she_o and_o to_o carry_v on_o that_o work_n her_o heart_n be_v so_o intense_o set_v upon_o that_o be_v the_o promote_a god_n interest_n in_o the_o world_n and_o the_o good_a of_o soul_n that_o the_o bushel_n of_o unkind_a silence_n and_o sudden_a forgetfulness_n may_v not_o be_v whelm_v over_o so_o burn_a and_o shine_v a_o light_n who_o heat_n and_o lustre_n may_v warm_v and_o enlighten_v other_o though_o set_v upon_o so_o low_a a_o candlestick_n as_o my_o hasty_a pen_n must_v place_v it_o on_o i_o willing_o wave_v a_o obvious_a preface_n of_o the_o usefulness_n and_o efficacy_n of_o good_a example_n to_o enlarge_v on_o which_o it_o may_v elsewhere_o appear_v i_o be_o not_o whole_o unfurnished_v because_o i_o design_v the_o concise_a brevity_n and_o for_o the_o same_o reason_n i_o shall_v pass_v by_o what_o concern_v she_o in_o all_o other_o regard_v but_o those_o the_o title_n page_n suggest_v or_o touch_v they_o no_o far_o than_o seem_v necessary_a for_o decency_n and_o order_n sake_n to_o introduce_v what_o i_o main_o and_o indeed_o sole_o design_n in_o this_o essay_n that_o those_o who_o read_v it_o may_v more_o full_o know_v of_o who_o these_o thing_n be_v speak_v to_o effect_v which_o i_o shall_v begin_v with_o a_o account_n of_o her_o parentage_n and_o birth_n leave_v under_o she_o own_o hand_n sect_n i._o of_o her_o birth_n and_o parentage_n before_o the_o transcribe_v of_o which_o i_o shall_v premise_v thus_o much_o concern_v her_o paper_n from_o which_o i_o be_o chief_o furnish_v for_o this_o work_n i_o sometime_o come_v into_o her_o chamber_n when_o she_o be_v write_v she_o will_v slide_v her_o book_n or_o paper_n into_o the_o drawer_n of_o the_o table_n on_o which_o she_o write_v and_o this_o have_v happen_v several_a time_n she_o one_o day_n on_o the_o like_a occasion_n bespeak_v i_o thus_o my_o dear_a let_v i_o beg_v one_o promise_n from_o thou_o which_o when_o i_o have_v assent_v to_o have_v demand_v what_o it_o be_v she_o reply_v that_o i_o will_v never_o look_v into_o the_o book_n and_o paper_n in_o that_o drawer_n so_o long_o as_o she_o live_v so_o tender_a be_v she_o rather_o to_o improve_v her_o time_n well_o than_o to_o have_v it_o know_v even_o to_o myself_o how_o well_o she_o spend_v it_o which_o promise_n as_o she_o full_o acquiesce_v in_o be_v on_o my_o part_n most_o faithful_o make_v good_a since_o her_o death_n among_o her_o many_o most_o useful_a excellent_a and_o pious_a write_n i_o find_v a_o large_a book_n in_o octavo_n of_o the_o best_a paper_n she_o can_v buy_v neat_o bind_v gild_a and_o rule_v with_o red_a provide_v for_o the_o use_n to_o which_o she_o so_o well_o employ_v it_o on_o the_o second_o page_n of_o which_o i_o find_v thus_o write_v elizabeth_n walker_n her_o book_n all_o writ_n with_o my_o own_o hand_n though_o the_o character_n do_v vary_v i_o strive_v to_o write_v a_o little_a deep_o my_o sight_n grow_v weak_a i_o say_v there_o be_v not_o one_o syllable_n which_o i_o have_v not_o write_v with_o my_o own_o hand_n in_o this_o book_n from_o the_o begin_n at_o one_o end_n in_o about_o two_o three_o part_n of_o it_o be_v write_v many_o excellent_a instruction_n and_o religious_a direction_n for_o the_o use_n of_o she_o two_o daughter_n who_o be_v then_o live_v to_o teach_v they_o how_o to_o serve_v god_n acceptable_o and_o promote_v the_o salvation_n of_o their_o soul_n which_o i_o shall_v have_v occasion_n oft_o to_o refer_v to_o and_o to_o transcribe_v many_o passage_n out_o of_o it_o in_o the_o sequel_n the_o other_o end_n bear_v this_o title_n some_o memorial_n of_o god_n providence_n to_o my_o husband_n self_n and_o child_n then_o she_o begin_v thus_o my_o husband_n be_v bear_v etc._n etc._n and_o so_o give_v a_o very_a exact_a account_n of_o my_o parentage_n family_n education_n and_o many_o signal_n mercy_n and_o diliverance_n vouchsafe_v i_o before_o she_o know_v i_o of_o which_o she_o have_v inform_v herself_o at_o several_a time_n by_o inquiry_n of_o i_o and_o discourse_n with_o i_o i_o suppose_v to_o inform_v our_o child_n after_o we_o that_o the_o generation_n to_o come_v may_v know_v they_o even_o the_o child_n which_o shall_v be_v bear_v who_o shall_v arise_v and_o declare_v they_o to_o their_o child_n that_o they_o may_v set_v their_o hope_n in_o god_n and_o not_o forget_v the_o work_n of_o god_n but_o keep_v his_o commandment_n as_o the_o psalmist_n speak_v psal_n lxxviij_o 6_o 7._o and_o after_o every_o one_o of_o they_o testify_v the_o sense_n of_o a_o very_a pious_a grateful_a mind_n in_o such_o expression_n as_o these_o blessed_n be_v god_n for_o his_o mercy_n to_o he_o then_o and_o in_o his_o far_a goodness_n to_o i_o therein_o for_o which_o merciful_a providence_n i_o bless_v god_n blessed_n be_v god_n that_o uphold_v he_o in_o it_o and_o deliver_v he_o from_o it_o etc._n etc._n i_o can_v scarce_o obtain_v of_o myself_o to_o add_v more_o on_o this_o head_n yet_o beg_v the_o candour_n of_o the_o christian_a reader_n i_o will_v venture_v to_o subjoin_v the_o last_o passage_n which_o in_o this_o paragraph_n concern_v myself_o because_o it_o savour_v no_o less_o of_o pious_a gratitude_n to_o god_n than_o most_o endear_n kindness_n towards_o i_o when_o he_o be_v ready_a to_o commence_v master_n of_o art_n good_a bishop_n brownrigg_n commend_v he_o to_o worthy_a doctor_n gauden_n to_o teach_v mrs._n mary_n lukenor_n dr._n gauden_n wife_n daughter_n who_o be_v afterward_o the_o wife_n of_o my_o lord_n townsend_n and_o die_v childless_a after_o three_o year_n spend_v in_o that_o employment_n and_o assist_v dr._n gauden_n in_o the_o ministry_n at_o bocken_n my_o dear_a come_v to_o be_v household_n chaplain_n to_o the_o good_a and_o noble_a right_a honourable_a robert_n earl_n of_o warwick_n at_o leez_n where_o he_o receive_v many_o mercy_n the_o chief_a to_o be_v esteem_v the_o crown_n god_n be_v please_v to_o give_v to_o his_o ministry_n in_o the_o conversion_n of_o the_o then_o lady_n mary_n rich_a since_o the_o right_n honourable_a countess_n of_o warwick_n a_o most_o incomparable_a woman_n in_o all_o ornament_n of_o nature_n and_o grace_n and_o his_o most_o sincere_a and_o entire_a friend_n who_o i_o beseech_v god_n in_o his_o infinite_a goodness_n to_o preserve_v and_o crown_n with_o all_o his_o mercy_n excuse_v the_o patho_n of_o a_o grateful_a mind_n which_o can_v refrain_v cry_v out_o concern_v these_o two_o holy_a woman_n never_o man_n have_v better_a friend_n than_o the_o one_o or_o better_a wife_n than_o the_o
other_o bless_a be_v my_o gracious_a god_n for_o his_o great_a kindness_n to_o i_o in_o they_o both_o after_o three_o year_n continuance_n in_o that_o family_n upon_o the_o death_n of_o dr._n read_v my_o lord_n present_v my_o dear_a to_o fyfield_n in_o essex_n a_o competent_a good_a live_n and_o subsistence_n bless_a be_v god_n for_o it_o good_a lord_n crown_v his_o ministry_n there_o with_o the_o success_n of_o the_o conversion_n and_o bring_v in_o their_o soul_n to_o the_o obedience_n and_o knowledge_n of_o jesus_n christ_n give_v he_o abundance_n of_o the_o grace_n of_o thy_o holy_a spirit_n and_o store_v his_o heart_n with_o the_o treasury_n of_o thy_o heavenly_a truth_n and_o continue_v my_o dear_a husband_n a_o faithful_a painful_a able_a labourer_n in_o thy_o vineyard_n if_o what_o i_o have_v thus_o far_o touch_v may_v savour_v of_o any_o vanity_n the_o modesty_n of_o what_o i_o have_v pass_v over_o may_v excuse_v the_o error_n at_o least_o to_o they_o who_o may_v see_v the_o original_a manuscript_n now_o to_o return_v to_o she_o of_o who_o i_o write_v she_o proceed_v i_o be_v bear_v at_o london_n in_o bucklersbury_n on_o thursday_n the_o 12_o of_o july_n in_o the_o year_n of_o our_o lord_n 1623._o and_o baptise_a the_o 20_o day_n of_o the_o same_o month._n the_o lord_n vouchsafe_v i_o a_o reception_n into_o the_o visible_a church_n of_o jesus_n christ_n when_o he_o most_o just_o may_v have_v suffer_v no_o eye_n to_o pity_v i_o but_o have_v cast_v i_o out_o to_o the_o loathe_n of_o my_o person_n in_o my_o original_a defilement_n and_o stain_n of_o my_o sinful_a nature_n but_o to_o my_o first_o admittance_n good_a lord_n enable_v i_o to_o ascend_v that_o be_v a_o member_n of_o thy_o church_n militant_a here_o on_o earth_n i_o may_v attain_v to_o be_v one_o of_o thy_o church_n triumphant_a in_o heaven_n my_o dear_a father_n be_v mr._n john_n sadler_n a_o very_a eminent_a citizen_n and_o of_o a_o most_o generous_a love_a and_o charitable_a disposition_n and_o a_o most_o tender_a father_n to_o i_o and_o a_o kind_a father-in-law_n to_o my_o husband_n he_o be_v bear_v at_o stratford_n upon_o avon_n in_o warwickshire_n where_o his_o ancestor_n live_v my_o grandfather_n have_v a_o good_a estate_n in_o and_o about_o the_o town_n he_o be_v of_o a_o free_a and_o noble_a spirit_n which_o somewhat_o outreach_v his_o estate_n but_o not_o give_v to_o any_o debauchery_n i_o ever_o hear_v of_o my_o father_n mother_n be_v a_o very_a wise_a pious_a and_o a_o good_a woman_n and_o live_v and_o die_v a_o good_a christian_n my_o father_n have_v no_o brother_n but_o three_o sister_n who_o be_v all_o eminent_o wise_a and_o good_a woman_n especial_o his_o young_a sister_n who_o marry_v my_o father_n partner_n in_o trade_n a_o religious_a good_a man._n in_o process_n of_o time_n my_o father_n be_v desire_v to_o change_v his_o single_a estate_n according_o a_o match_n be_v provide_v for_o he_o but_o he_o by_o god_n providence_n approve_v not_o of_o it_o his_o father_n then_o provide_v he_o good_a clothes_n good_a horse_n and_o money_n in_o his_o purse_n and_o send_v he_o to_o make_v his_o address_n to_o a_o gentlewoman_n in_o that_o country_n but_o he_o consider_v well_o how_o difficult_a a_o marry_a condition_n be_v like_a to_o prove_v his_o father_n have_v reduce_v his_o estate_n from_o about_o 400_o l._n a_o year_n to_o 80._o his_o own_o prudence_n but_o especial_o god_n good_a providence_n overrule_a his_o mind_n instead_o of_o go_v a_o woo_v he_o join_v himself_o to_o the_o carrier_n and_o come_v to_o london_n where_o he_o have_v never_o be_v before_o and_o sell_v his_o horse_n in_o smithfield_n and_o have_v no_o acquaintance_n in_o london_n to_o recommend_v he_o or_o assist_v he_o he_o go_v from_o street_n to_o street_n and_o house_n to_o house_n ask_v if_o they_o want_v a_o apprentice_n and_o though_o he_o meet_v with_o many_o discourage_a scorn_n and_o a_o thousand_o denial_n he_o go_v on_o till_o he_o light_v on_o mr._n break_z bank_n a_o grocer_n in_o bucklersbury_n who_o though_o he_o long_o deny_v he_o for_o want_v of_o surety_n for_o his_o fidelity_n and_o because_o the_o money_n he_o have_v but_o ten_o pound_n be_v so_o disproportionable_a to_o what_o he_o use_v to_o receive_v with_o apprentice_n yet_o upon_o his_o discreet_a account_n he_o give_v of_o himself_o and_o the_o motive_n which_o put_v he_o upon_o that_o course_n and_o promise_v to_o compensate_a with_o diligent_a and_o faithful_a service_n what_o ever_o else_o be_v short_a of_o his_o expectation_n he_o venture_v to_o receive_v he_o upon_o trial_n in_o which_o he_o so_o well_o approve_v himself_o that_o he_o accept_v he_o into_o his_o service_n to_o which_o he_o bind_v he_o for_o eight_o year_n to_o which_o he_o willing_o submit_v though_o he_o be_v then_o full_a twentyone_a year_n old_a and_o there_o he_o serve_v a_o faithful_a and_o laborious_a apprenticeship_n but_o much_o like_v of_o his_o master_n and_o mistress_n and_o after_o serve_v he_o five_o year_n journeyman_n they_o not_o be_v willing_a to_o part_v with_o he_o in_o which_o time_n he_o have_v his_o master_n leave_n to_o trade_n for_o himself_o in_o drug_n and_o tobacco_n by_o which_o he_o leave_v grocery_n and_o be_v by_o trade_n a_o druggist_n in_o london_n and_o by_o that_o profession_n god_n bless_v my_o dear_a father_n with_o a_o very_a plentiful_a and_o good_a estate_n with_o which_o god_n give_v he_o a_o bountiful_a mind_n and_o liberal_a heart_n to_o do_v much_o good_a to_o his_o relation_n and_o other_o my_o dear_a mother_n mrs._n elizabeth_n sadler_n be_v the_o daughter_n of_o mr._n dackum_n sometime_o minister_n of_o portsmouth_n also_o my_o grandmother_n dackum_n be_v a_o very_a wise_a and_o prudent_a woman_n in_o my_o infancy_n i_o be_v very_o sickly_a and_o of_o a_o weak_o constitution_n bless_a be_v god_n for_o the_o love_n and_o care_n of_o parent_n and_o friend_n in_o my_o childhood_n estate_n she_o be_v her_o parent_n first_o bear_v after_o five_o year_n marriage_n and_o despair_v of_o have_v child_n which_o render_v they_o exceed_v tender_a of_o she_o and_o yet_o be_v she_o well_o nigh_o starve_v at_o nurse_n at_o lusam_n in_o kent_n for_o though_o her_o parent_n send_v so_o bountiful_o beside_o the_o nurse_n wage_n as_o may_v near_o maintain_v the_o family_n yet_o have_v they_o find_v the_o meat_n they_o send_v ready_a to_o stink_v for_o want_v of_o dress_v in_o my_o full_a age_n i_o be_v of_o a_o pensive_a nature_n god_n see_v it_o good_a that_o i_o shall_v bear_v the_o yoke_n in_o my_o youth_n but_o i_o do_v not_o consider_v the_o hand_n that_o put_v it_o on_o when_o i_o be_v young_a the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o deliver_v i_o from_o many_o casualty_n after_o name_v they_o she_o always_o conclude_v with_o praise_n bless_v be_v his_o prevent_a mercy_n blessed_n be_v god_n that_o preserve_v i_o in_o that_o danger_n and_o such_o like_a if_o st._n augustin_n confess_v of_o his_o rob_v a_o orchard_n be_v so_o much_o approve_v why_o may_v not_o i_o touch_v so_o small_a a_o thing_n as_o i_o meet_v with_o here_o which_o show_v the_o tenderness_n of_o her_o spirit_n when_o i_o be_v a_o child_n my_o mother_n will_v send_v i_o where_o she_o less_o trust_v my_o sister_n in_o what_o i_o may_v fail_v i_o can_v call_v to_o mind_n but_o i_o remember_v she_o send_v i_o where_o she_o keep_v her_o apple_n they_o suit_v my_o childish_a appetite_n i_o take_v one_o i_o can_v not_o keep_v it_o but_o think_v i_o have_v steal_v it_o i_o go_v back_o unlock_v the_o door_n but_o with_o some_o regret_n lay_v down_o the_o apple_n bless_a be_v restrain_v grace_n but_o i_o must_v pass_v over_o a_o great_a many_o thing_n for_o brevity_n which_o may_v be_v useful_a unto_o other_o and_o be_v very_o pleasant_a to_o myself_o in_o read_v for_o the_o savoury_a sense_n of_o pious_a gratitude_n which_o all_o along_o breath_n in_o they_o yet_o i_o will_v not_o hide_v the_o great_a fault_n i_o ever_o know_v her_o guilty_a of_o in_o my_o own_o observation_n or_o find_v she_o charge_v herself_o with_o either_o in_o her_o book_n or_o diary_n have_v write_v many_o thing_n which_o i_o pass_v by_o and_o last_o concern_v the_o burn_a of_o her_o father_n house_n she_o thus_o proceed_v about_o half_a a_o year_n after_o the_o fire_n which_o be_v when_o she_o be_v about_o thirteen_o or_o fourteen_o year_n old_a my_o father_n have_v a_o great_a fit_a of_o sickness_n which_o hold_v he_o a_o quarter_n of_o a_o year_n and_o in_o great_a danger_n of_o death_n in_o which_o time_n of_o his_o sickness_n i_o poor_a wretched_a creature_n through_o a_o sudden_a surprise_n and_o provocation_n speak_v a_o wicked_a word_n to_o a_o superior_a of_o which_o my_o father_n be_v inform_v and_o most_o
wise_o and_o grave_o admonish_v they_o of_o the_o evil_a tell_v they_o that_o modesty_n be_v a_o woman_n ornament_n and_o guard_n of_o chastity_n which_o will_v seldom_o or_o never_o be_v attempt_v do_v not_o some_o lightness_n or_o unwary_a carriage_n embolden_v those_o who_o do_v assault_v it_o and_o the_o flame_n which_o scorch_v the_o female-honour_n be_v most_o kindle_v by_o spark_n of_o their_o own_o strike_n sect_n xvi_o visitation_n by_o sickness_n on_o ourselves_o or_o child_n and_o death_n of_o some_o of_o they_o though_o there_o be_v not_o one_o of_o these_o which_o she_o have_v not_o record_v yet_o i_o shall_v touch_v but_o few_o of_o they_o she_o be_v always_o the_o same_o under_o the_o like_a dispensation_n all_o of_o a_o piece_n i_o be_o very_o sensible_a how_o little_a other_o be_v concern_v to_o be_v acquaint_v with_o god_n particular_a deal_n towards_o so_o private_a and_o obscure_a person_n yet_o her_o affectionate_a tenderness_n her_o devout_a address_n to_o god_n her_o faith_n in_o dependence_n upon_o he_o her_o meek_a submission_n to_o he_o her_o silent_a acquiescence_n under_o they_o and_o the_o support_v god_n vouchsafe_v she_o in_o such_o trial_n i_o think_v may_v be_v useful_a to_o other_o woman_n wife_n and_o mother_n in_o like_a trial_n which_o be_v the_o end_n for_o which_o i_o write_v the_o whole_a i_o have_v give_v one_o instance_n of_o her_o behaviour_n in_o one_o of_o my_o sickness_n and_o can_v add_v many_o more_o in_o all_o which_o she_o manifest_v no_o less_o endear_n love_n to_o i_o nor_o less_o fervent_a address_n to_o god_n in_o time_n of_o my_o danger_n or_o pious_a and_o enlarge_v praise_n upon_o my_o recovery_n december_n 1660._o after_o lying-in_n she_o have_v a_o long_a and_o sore_a sickness_n of_o which_o she_o thus_o write_v i_o acknowledge_v to_o the_o praise_n of_o god_n that_o in_o this_o sickness_n i_o have_v many_o manifestation_n of_o the_o love_n of_o god_n in_o his_o people_n beside_o the_o very_a great_a care_n and_o most_o endear_n love_n of_o my_o husband_n so_o exceed_o express_v to_o i_o most_o be_v much_o concern_v for_o i_o and_o be_v great_a solicitor_n at_o the_o throne_n of_o grace_n in_o my_o behalf_n i_o bless_v god_n that_o do_v not_o suffer_v my_o strong_a enemy_n to_o triumph_n over_o i_o though_o he_o impetuous_o assault_v i_o for_o great_a be_v he_o that_o be_v for_o i_o than_o he_o that_o be_v against_o i_o i_o remember_v that_o in_o this_o sickness_n which_o hold_v i_o long_o and_o bring_v i_o very_o low_a that_o almost_o a_o quarter_n of_o a_o year_n i_o have_v one_o or_o two_o to_o watch_v with_o i_o every_o night_n in_o which_o as_o in_o other_o long_a sickness_n i_o be_v never_o unprovided_a but_o have_v the_o continue_a readiness_n of_o friend_n to_o i_o or_o i_o in_o their_o attendance_n and_o help_n for_o which_o i_o bless_v god_n a_o plain_a neighbour_n a_o poor_a woman_n come_v to_o see_v i_o and_z with_o much_o joy_n see_v i_o out_o of_o my_o bed_n tell_v i_o she_o never_o awake_v in_o the_o night_n but_o she_o pray_v for_o i_o and_o according_a to_o her_o plain_a expression_n say_v that_o i_o have_v as_o many_o prayer_n as_o if_o i_o be_v a_o queen_n good_a lord_n shower_n down_o the_o blessing_n of_o prayer_n upon_o my_o soul_n god_n good_a providence_n have_v be_v such_o to_o i_o that_o with_o other_o signal_n mercy_n i_o can_v choose_v but_o express_v his_o kindness_n to_o i_o in_o restrain_v the_o smoke_v of_o a_o chimney_n in_o a_o chamber_n which_o be_v most_o convenient_a for_o i_o at_o my_o lyings-in_a and_o in_o time_n of_o sickness_n which_o at_o other_o time_n when_o i_o have_v have_v little_a use_n of_o it_o have_v be_v very_o subject_a to_o smoke_n but_o than_o it_o never_o annoy_v i_o how_o fantastic_a this_o may_v seem_v to_o any_o yet_o i_o bless_v god_n for_o it_o who_o compass_v i_o about_o with_o love_a kindness_n and_o tender_a mercy_n my_o daughter_n margaret_n have_v a_o long_a quartane_a ague_n about_o the_o year_n 1663._o which_o hold_v she_o three_o quarter_n of_o a_o year_n we_o use_v several_a medicine_n but_o they_o prove_v ineffectual_a but_o by_o god_n providence_n a_o very_a holy_a good_a man_n my_o very_a choice_n good_a friend_n a_o great_a support_n to_o i_o in_o my_o affliction_n come_v to_o see_v we_o and_o advise_v i_o to_o the_o use_n of_o matthews_n pill_n my_o good_a friend_n help_v i_o to_o weigh_v out_o twenty_o grain_n for_o twice_o take_v which_o have_v so_o good_a effect_n that_o after_o the_o first_o she_o take_v she_o have_v not_o the_o least_o symptom_n of_o a_o fit_a which_o before_o be_v very_o afflictive_a i_o bless_v god_n for_o the_o mercy_n and_o very_o believe_v the_o benefit_n be_v more_o from_o the_o prayer_n of_o the_o good_a man_n than_o from_o the_o medicine_n which_o have_v be_v use_v oft_o by_o other_o and_o not_o have_v the_o like_a success_n in_o the_o year_n 1667._o my_o daughter_n margaret_n have_v a_o most_o dangerous_a fit_a which_o exceed_o surprise_a i_o with_o great_a fear_n the_o more_o because_o my_o husband_n be_v a_o mile_n or_o two_o from_o home_n she_o be_v sudden_o take_v with_o most_o violent_a vomit_v viscous_a green_a and_o black_a matter_n and_o so_o sick_a withal_o as_o if_o she_o will_v have_v die_v present_o she_o vomit_v tough_a phlegm_n like_o gristle_n with_o which_o i_o think_v i_o see_v digest_v worm_n which_o matter_n i_o believe_v be_v contract_v by_o she_o long_o quartane_a we_o can_v not_o tell_v the_o certain_a occasion_n of_o her_o illness_n but_o fear_v it_o may_v be_v the_o give_v she_o some_o mercurius_n dulcis_fw-la which_o have_v be_v keep_v long_o be_v grow_v crude_a again_o but_o whatever_o it_o be_v we_o hope_v it_o contribute_v much_o to_o her_o future_a health_n through_o the_o overrule_a goodness_n of_o god_n for_o the_o abundance_n of_o corrupt_a matter_n which_o come_v away_o must_v needs_o have_v be_v very_o prejudicial_a to_o she_o if_o it_o have_v be_v retain_v o_o lord_n i_o bless_v thou_o who_o can_v and_o do_v bring_v good_a out_o of_o those_o evil_n which_o be_v most_o affright_v and_o disquiet_v to_o we_o i_o beseech_v thou_o with_o this_o and_o all_o other_o thy_o providential_a dispensation_n to_o she_o quicken_v and_o excite_v she_o to_o a_o thankful_a acknowledment_n of_o thy_o mercy_n in_o a_o holy_a life_n and_o her_o future_a dependence_n and_o trust_n in_o thou_o such_o devout_a and_o grateful_a improvement_n do_v this_o holy_a woman_n constant_o make_v on_o all_o god_n providence_n towards_o herself_o and_o other_o which_o i_o humble_o and_o hearty_o pray_v they_o may_v kindle_v in_o all_o who_o read_v they_o in_o the_o like_a circumstance_n to_o themselves_o and_o they_o which_o be_v the_o only_a reason_n of_o my_o transcribe_v they_o the_o next_o afflictive_a providence_n i_o shall_v take_v notice_n of_o have_v pass_v by_o many_o be_v the_o sickness_n and_o death_n of_o her_o daughter_n mary_n which_o she_o set_v down_o more_o large_o than_o usual_o with_o 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divine_a promise_n in_o the_o sacred_a volume_n and_o will_v stigmatize_v such_o impression_n with_o the_o contemptuous_a brand_n of_o enthusiasm_n or_o at_o the_o mild_a slight_a they_o as_o the_o effect_n of_o warm_a fancy_n but_o let_v they_o alone_o i_o will_v not_o disturb_v their_o please_a dream_n yet_o wisdom_n be_v justify_v of_o her_o child_n and_o though_o i_o will_v not_o presume_v to_o say_v we_o speak_v wisdom_n to_o they_o who_o be_v perfect_a and_o write_v such_o thing_n for_o they_o who_o have_v their_o sense_n exercise_v to_o discern_v and_o relish_v they_o yet_o i_o can_v but_o call_v to_o mind_n how_o petrus_n blesensis_n endorse_v his_o treatise_n of_o the_o love_n of_o god_n secretum_fw-la meum_fw-la mihi_fw-la my_o secret_n to_o myself_o and_o i_o hope_v this_o will_v meet_v with_o some_o reader_n to_o who_o it_o may_v not_o be_v as_o insipid_a as_o the_o white_a of_o a_o egg_n to_o allude_v to_o job_n expression_n and_o for_o those_o who_o think_v it_o the_o 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afford_v she_o both_o for_o the_o health_n of_o her_o body_n and_o satisfaction_n of_o her_o mind_n only_o she_o will_v appear_v once_o or_o at_o the_o most_o twice_o in_o the_o whole_a season_n on_o the_o green_n on_o a_o dance_a night_n not_o so_o much_o by_o inclination_n as_o to_o avoid_v the_o imputation_n of_o moroseness_n and_o affectation_n her_o charity_n be_v also_o always_o very_o considerable_a at_o tunbridge-well_n where_o she_o obtain_v signal_n mercy_n from_o god_n she_o show_v mercy_n for_o his_o sake_n to_o those_o she_o judge_v fit_a object_n of_o it_o though_o she_o have_v but_o a_o shallow_a purse_n she_o have_v deep_a compassion_n and_o i_o find_v above_o twenty_o shilling_n in_o money_n give_v in_o a_o water-season_n beside_o bibles_n and_o other_o good_a book_n which_o she_o carry_v down_o with_o she_o send_v for_o to_o london_n or_o buy_v there_o to_o give_v away_o to_o poor_a people_n as_o often_o as_o she_o go_v the_o commodious_a privacy_n of_o our_o 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a_o year_n i_o grow_v melancholy_a occasion_v by_o some_o discontent_n which_o god_n be_v please_v to_o cure_v with_o a_o smart_n corrosive_n through_o suffer_v satan_n to_o take_v advantage_n of_o that_o humour_n which_o affliction_n swallow_v up_o all_o my_o other_o trouble_n i_o go_v to_o prayer_n according_a to_o my_o usual_a custom_n before_o i_o kneel_v down_o by_o a_o outward_a action_n of_o my_o hand_n which_o be_v in_o itself_o very_o innocent_a and_o at_o that_o time_n not_o irreverent_a far_o than_o the_o devil_n make_v it_o so_o by_o cast_v a_o blasphemous_a suggestion_n into_o my_o mind_n which_o look_v very_o hideous_o upon_o i_o but_o notwithstanding_o i_o pray_v without_o far_a molestation_n at_o that_o time_n i_o can_v remember_v what_o notice_n i_o take_v of_o the_o temptation_n in_o my_o prayer_n but_o when_o i_o have_v end_v my_o prayer_n my_o enemy_n fierce_o assault_v i_o i_o can_v neither_o see_v any_o thing_n nor_o hear_v or_o do_v any_o thing_n but_o evil_a motion_n be_v force_v into_o my_o mind_n and_o though_o i_o beseech_v the_o lord_n more_o than_o thrice_o i_o can_v not_o be_v free_a from_o that_o affliction_n sometime_o through_o my_o dark_a and_o cloudy_a fancy_n i_o have_v temptation_n that_o there_o be_v no_o god_n which_o be_v very_o vexatious_a to_o i_o and_o i_o impatient_a of_o it_o desire_v to_o apprehend_v a_o god_n all_o vengeance_n and_o terror_n rather_o than_o no_o god_n at_o all_o but_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o obviate_v that_o temptation_n by_o my_o meditate_v on_o the_o creation_n my_o father_n much_o love_a flower_n and_o as_o the_o season_n of_o the_o year_n will_v afford_v always_o have_v his_o flower-pot_n stand_v by_o he_o where_o he_o sit_v write_v in_o his_o shop_n but_o then_o be_v above_o in_o the_o parlour_n window_n to_o which_o i_o often_o go_v to_o countermine_v my_o temptation_n in_o admire_v the_o curious_a work_n of_o the_o god_n of_o nature_n with_o other_o there_o be_v then_o in_o flower_n a_o chalcedon_n iris_n full_a of_o the_o impress_n of_o god_n curious_a workmanship_n which_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o make_v use_n of_o to_o raise_v my_o poor_a heart_n and_o thought_n to_o the_o admire_a and_o adore_v of_o he_o bless_a be_v god_n that_o that_o temptation_n be_v not_o above_o my_o strength_n in_o the_o time_n of_o my_o extremity_n i_o go_v to_o mr._n watson_n a_o good_a man_n minister_n of_o stephen_n walbrook_n the_o parish_n wherein_o we_o live_v to_o he_o i_o impart_v somewhat_o of_o my_o trouble_n he_o strive_v to_o comfort_v i_o i_o find_v little_a ease_n with_o my_o burden_n it_o grow_v more_o heavy_a i_o repent_v i_o have_v make_v my_o condition_n know_v i_o think_v my_o estate_n to_o be_v singular_a and_o that_o i_o shall_v
hear_v book_n and_o ballad_n cry_v of_o i_o about_o the_o street_n though_o i_o have_v not_o acquaint_v any_o with_o my_o trouble_n but_o only_a mr._n watson_n my_o father_n sister_n my_o dear_a aunt_n quiney_n a_o gracious_a good_a woman_n take_v notice_n of_o my_o deject_a spirit_n she_o waylay_v i_o in_o my_o come_n home_o from_o the_o morning_n exercise_n then_o in_o our_o parish_n she_o surprise_v i_o with_o a_o inquisitive_a desire_n to_o know_v what_o i_o ail_v but_o i_o not_o ready_o inform_v she_o she_o ask_v i_o if_o i_o be_v not_o trouble_v with_o temptation_n i_o marvel_v at_o the_o question_n and_o then_o acquaint_v she_o with_o my_o affliction_n she_z from_o her_o own_o experience_n in_o the_o like_a case_n advise_v i_o which_o for_o the_o present_a be_v a_o refreshment_n to_o i_o for_o before_o i_o be_v not_o acquaint_v with_o any_o in_o the_o like_a condition_n with_o myself_o some_o little_a time_n after_o my_o dear_a father_n take_v notice_n of_o i_o that_o i_o be_v not_o well_o but_o not_o full_o understand_v what_o i_o ail_v send_v for_o a_o physician_n to_o i_o dr._n bathurst_n who_o i_o hope_v be_v a_o good_a man_n but_o i_o be_v much_o trouble_v at_o his_o come_n though_o i_o know_v my_o father_n send_v for_o he_o in_o his_o great_a care_n and_o love_n to_o i_o the_o physician_n come_v to_o i_o one_o morning_n before_o i_o be_v out_o of_o bed_n he_o perceive_v my_o distemper_n to_o be_v most_o dejectedness_n and_o melancholy_n with_o other_o talk_n he_o discourse_v very_o pious_o with_o i_o i_o take_v the_o freedom_n to_o tell_v he_o i_o think_v i_o do_v not_o need_v a_o physician_n and_o with_o the_o expression_n of_o my_o respect_n desire_v he_o to_o forbear_v come_v to_o i_o which_o the_o good_a man_n do_v not_o take_v ill_a but_o with_o good_a counsel_n leave_v i_o it_o please_v the_o lord_n sometime_o to_o refresh_v i_o with_o those_o word_n of_o the_o psalmist_n why_o be_v thou_o cast_v down_o o_o my_o soul_n and_o why_o be_v thou_o 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good_a man_n he_o be_v minister_n of_o banston_n in_o essex_n my_o dear_a father_n hire_v a_o coaeh_n and_o go_v with_o i_o to_o mr._n beadle_n and_o with_o the_o expression_n of_o his_o tender_a love_n say_v to_o i_o that_o i_o shall_v not_o want_v any_o thing_n to_o do_v i_o good_a to_o the_o one_o half_a of_o his_o estate_n and_o he_o be_v very_o bountiful_a in_o the_o requital_n of_o my_o receipt_n in_o that_o family_n god_n goodness_n to_o be_v acknowledge_v my_o dear_a mother_n then_o be_v very_o kind_a to_o i_o i_o live_v at_o mr._n beadle_n half_a a_o year_n where_o i_o have_v the_o fatherly_a care_n and_o counsel_n and_o prayer_n of_o that_o good_a man_n with_o the_o great_a love_n of_o his_o wife_n a_o very_a good_a woman_n and_o very_o kind_a to_o i_o and_o the_o manifestation_n of_o the_o respect_n and_o care_n of_o their_o child_n and_o servant_n in_o any_o thing_n that_o may_v tend_v to_o my_o satisfaction_n and_o comfort_n the_o lord_n requite_v it_o to_o they_o in_o 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may_v have_v be_v more_o signal_n in_o the_o discovery_n and_o manifestation_n of_o his_o favour_n in_o my_o victory_n and_o conquest_n of_o my_o temptation_n it_o be_v not_o for_o i_o to_o prescribe_v or_o limit_v the_o holy_a one_o of_o israel_n if_o i_o may_v take_v leave_n to_o beg_v and_o wait_v on_o he_o in_o who_o be_v all_o my_o fresh_a spring_n for_o supply_v of_o grace_n and_o comfort_n if_o the_o lord_n will_v give_v to_o i_o his_o unworthy_a creature_n in_o penny_n and_o half_a penny_n what_o in_o big_a sum_n he_o see_v fit_a to_o bestow_v on_o other_o that_o my_o dependence_n may_v be_v continual_o on_o he_o i_o desire_v to_o be_v thankful_a lord_n if_o thou_o will_v not_o subdue_v my_o enemy_n at_o once_o yet_o make_v they_o tributary_n to_o thy_o glory_n and_o my_o spiritual_a advantage_n that_o these_o amorites_n may_v be_v hewer_n of_o wood_n and_o drawer_n of_o water_n useful_a to_o i_o that_o i_o may_v see_v my_o own_o deficiency_n and_o thy_o strength_n in_o my_o weakness_n for_o if_o thy_o presence_n go_v not_o with_o i_o i_o shall_v soon_o desert_v thy_o cause_n and_o though_o i_o may_v be_v assault_v let_v i_o not_o be_v overcome_v but_o see_v the_o quarrel_n be_v thy_o own_o lord_n undertake_v for_o i_o in_o this_o my_o military_a life_n here_o where_o there_o be_v no_o cessation_n of_o arm_n that_o i_o may_v war_v a_o good_a warfare_n that_o those_o my_o enemy_n which_o now_o affright_v i_o i_o may_v see_v no_o more_o for_o ever_o so_o grant_v lord_n jesus_n amen_n amen_n this_o mind_n i_o of_o that_o apposite_a passage_n in_o dan._n x._o 10_o 11._o and_o very_o applicable_a to_o her_o case_n vers_fw-la 9_o daniel_n be_v asleep_a upon_o his_o face_n with_o his_o face_n towards_o the_o ground_n then_z vers_n 10_o and_o behold_v a_o hand_n touch_v i_o which_o set_v i_o upon_o my_o knee_n and_o the_o palm_n of_o my_o hand_n and_o then_o vers_n 11._o he_o say_v to_o he_o stand_v upright_o on_o which_o place_n i_o meet_v with_o this_o note_n the_o lord_n do_v not_o at_o once_o restore_v his_o servant_n from_o their_o frailty_n that_o they_o by_o gradual_a comfort_n may_v prize_v every_o drop_n of_o mercy_n being_n not_o quicken_v all_o at_o once_o when_o they_o be_v mortify_v but_o may_v be_v admonish_v by_o the_o remainder_n of_o fear_n and_o frailty_n to_o keep_v their_o heart_n humble_a and_o in_o continual_a dependence_n upon_o god_n i_o shall_v have_v occasion_n more_o than_o once_o to_o touch_v this_o doleful_a string_n again_o it_o be_v record_v of_o our_o lord_n that_o when_o he_o be_v baptise_a he_o be_v drive_v of_o the_o spirit_n into_o the_o
sometime_o two_o by_o the_o glass_n she_o will_v be_v attentive_a at_o the_o read_v the_o scripture_n in_o the_o family_n and_o ask_v her_o sister_n the_o meaning_n of_o some_o passage_n she_o understand_v not_o she_o will_v constant_o go_v alone_o to_o prayer_n she_o tell_v one_o of_o the_o maid_n the_o devil_n tempt_v she_o to_o play_n at_o prayer_n but_o she_o have_v pray_v against_o he_o and_o that_o he_o do_v not_o trouble_v she_o so_o much_o since_o she_o desire_v one_o of_o her_o sister_n to_o grant_v she_o a_o request_n and_o say_v that_o she_o must_v not_o deny_v she_o which_o be_v not_o to_o refuse_v any_o good_a counsel_n when_o ever_o it_o be_v give_v she_o but_o to_o accept_v of_o it_o from_o who_o soever_o it_o come_v another_o time_n be_v with_o her_o sister_n as_o they_o sit_v at_o work_n she_o tell_v they_o all_o those_o thing_n will_v be_v dirt_n in_o heaven_n and_o it_o most_o concern_v they_o to_o get_v their_o sin_n pardon_v and_o a_o interest_n in_o jesus_n christ_n discourse_v of_o the_o vanity_n of_o this_o world_n and_o happiness_n of_o be_v good_a and_o fit_a for_o heaven_n as_o she_o have_v opportunity_n she_o will_v frequent_o be_v give_v good_a counsel_n with_o much_o sweetness_n and_o gravity_n if_o she_o be_v ill_o she_o will_v strive_v to_o hide_v it_o for_o fear_v of_o grief_n to_o her_o father_n and_o myself_o say_v when_o we_o ask_v she_o how_o she_o do_v pretty_a well_o i_o thank_v god_n four_o day_n before_o she_o die_v when_o the_o maid_n go_v to_o help_v she_o up_o in_o the_o morning_n she_o tell_v she_o she_o be_v very_o sick_a but_o god_n will_v do_v her_o good_a by_o that_o sickness_n and_o she_o shall_v love_v he_o the_o better_a for_o it_o in_o this_o last_o and_o short_a sickness_n she_o have_v very_o serious_a apprehension_n of_o death_n say_v she_o shall_v die_v but_o be_v not_o afraid_a of_o death_n and_o desire_v she_o may_v die_v quiet_o and_o without_o disturbance_n the_o physician_n desire_v to_o give_v she_o a_o little_a wine_n ask_v she_o if_o she_o love_v sack_n she_o answer_v no._n he_o desire_v she_o to_o take_v a_o little_a she_o say_v she_o will_v if_o he_o please_v but_o she_o do_v not_o love_v it_o to_o fuddle_v with_o a_o few_o hour_n before_o she_o die_v she_o desire_v to_o go_v to_o bed_n out_o of_o which_o she_o have_v be_v take_v by_o reason_n of_o the_o phlegm_n that_o trouble_v she_o and_o i_o be_v unwilling_a she_o say_v she_o will_v now_o go_v to_o bed_n for_o adieu_o and_o for_o all_o where_o she_o fall_v a_o sleep_n in_o jesus_n enfold_v in_o the_o arm_n of_o everlasting_a mercy_n she_o resign_v up_o her_o soul_n with_o these_o and_o the_o like_a expression_n lord_n let_v i_o come_v to_o thou_o my_o lord_n and_o my_o god_n and_o lord_n jesus_n receive_v my_o spirit_n i_o acknowledge_v the_o word_n be_v give_v she_o but_o she_o ready_o receive_v they_o and_o oft_o repeat_v though_o she_o can_v not_o speak_v but_o with_o difficulty_n she_o have_v be_v so_o affable_a and_o win_a to_o all_o rich_a and_o poor_a that_o many_o shed_v more_o tear_n for_o she_o than_o at_o the_o departure_n of_o their_o own_o child_n she_o be_v much_o desire_v in_o life_n and_o of_o all_o who_o know_v she_o much_o lament_v at_o death_n how_o partial_a soever_o this_o relation_n may_v seem_v to_o any_o and_o as_o from_o bribe_v affection_n yet_o i_o assert_v the_o truth_n to_o god_n goodness_n who_o have_v ordain_v praise_n in_o the_o mouth_n of_o babe_n and_o suckling_n and_o have_v i_o humble_o hope_v now_o perfect_v the_o same_o in_o the_o consummation_n of_o her_o eternal_a bliss_n in_o the_o fruition_n of_o himself_o to_o his_o everlasting_a praise_n i_o have_v hitherto_o in_o this_o account_n leave_v out_o many_o remarkable_a passage_n for_o brevity_n let_v i_o obtain_v liberty_n to_o transcribe_v the_o rest_n of_o the_o paragraph_n verbatim_o word_n for_o word_n as_o her_o pen_n leave_v it_o lord_n i_o bless_v thou_o that_o of_o eleven_o for_o who_o i_o praise_v thou_o 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and_o bound_v up_o their_o soul_n in_o the_o bundle_n of_o eternal_a life_n amen_o amen_n january_n 23._o 1669._o be_v a_o day_n of_o mercy_n to_o i_o in_o the_o midst_n of_o my_o affliction_n be_v lord_n day_n my_o sweet_a mary_n lie_v then_o dead_a with_o we_o in_o the_o house_n the_o extremity_n of_o my_o affection_n force_v i_o into_o the_o chamber_n where_o she_o than_o lay_v a_o cold_a piece_n of_o clay_n i_o there_o pour_v out_o my_o soul_n to_o god_n in_o prayer_n and_o from_o thence_o return_v into_o to_o the_o chamber_n of_o my_o signal_n mercy_n i_o have_v receive_v from_o god_n who_o comfort_v those_o who_o be_v cast_v down_o though_o he_o deny_v my_o vehement_a desire_n and_o wrestle_n with_o he_o in_o the_o time_n of_o her_o sickness_n for_o her_o long_a continuance_n with_o i_o in_o this_o world_n the_o lord_n abundant_o make_v up_o and_o compensated_a my_o loss_n i_o take_v my_o bible_n and_o my_o intention_n be_v to_o read_v in_o the_o new-testament_n to_o allay_v my_o 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