To bar up the Castle-door Ravish the Lady Lord comes home Slave mounts to th'upper Room Murders his Children 'fore his face Begging to spare his younger Race He yields if he will cut off his Nose The Father did so the Slave chose To kill the last Child throws him down And himself split upon the ground Th' Italian threats his Friend to kill Except he swear aginst his will To save his life he swore was sham'd Then die says he Villain and die damn'd A Bigot to revenge his Brothers death Arms Cap-a-pee foams out of breath Ceases not to Swear and Swagger Till h 'as the Murdrers Heart or point Dagger CANTO VII Ours are Robbin-Hood Whipping-Tom and all the Lines Of Bloody Guelphs and Gibbelins We were at the Sycilian Evensong To Paris Massacre we did throng Where Blood and Wine were spilt and drank Good store to play a wedding Prank Upon St. Bartholomew his score For that trick Trust him no more Peter Ramus after all their Looks Thou wast found hid under thy Books Varlets all gone but one he had a Charm Alas poor Scholar felt thy Cushion warm Thou diest a Scholars death with all thy Logick Was not this a gallant Frollick A Marshal and brave Souls had their lot That dismal Night to go to th'Pot The Powder-Treason Eighty Eight All the Conspiracies of late We built the Scaffold for a King Before his House of Banquetting After long baiting out of breath Brought to his Door to feast on Death One kept on 's knees pray'd for good luck Whilst the Fatal Blow was struck Bajazet's Cage and Pompey's Boat Where the Egyptian cut his Throat Seneca's Bath Phalaris Bull The Trojan Horse believ 't that wull The groaning Stairs the Starving Vault With the Lamp everlasting fraught The Sack thrown in the Sea fast tyed With Dog Ape Viper Cock and Parricide Jack Straw Wat Tylar Perkin Simson Went for Princes clad in Crimson Till we brought them to the Spit Or Gallows to learn more wit John-a-Styles and John-an-Okus Jack Tredescan Hocus Pocus Jugglers Gypsies and Trepanners With neither Honesty nor Manners Every Son or Mothers Daughter Of Rogues and Rascals follow after At the Black Rock the Northern Pole We fish for huge Whales and Cajole All the white Greenland Bears To fall together by the ears There 's a sad rout we leave them for meat For Fins and Laplanders to eat We meet and welcom at a day All the Monsters of Africa We whisper in a Rain-Deers ear And read a Lecture to a Steer Then up we get upon their Bums Soaring i' the Air and knitting Thrums Many a deadly stitch we fetch In Nets and Noozes Men to catch Oh 't is brave Sport the trade we drive To kill all the Bees in a Hive We gather all the poys'nous Grass That grows upon the Hills of Brass In Springs and Lakes and Rivers sides At Low Water and Spring Tides In Woods and Grotto's Sands and Rocks We scratch our Rumps and tear our Smocks To find out deadly Drugs and Simples For the Plague Poxes or Pimples These we distil and temper wisely And give Doses at hours precisely Under such or such a Star Or Aspects for Peace or War Kind or Malignant Quartiles Trines Either for good or bad Designs The Face of Heaven is fair or foul According as we smile or scowl The Twelve Houses by us are haunted The whole World by them 's enchanted Ascendents Lords and Ladies of the Hour All influenced by our Power In Zeniths Azimuths and Nadirs In Almacantars we are Traders We square the Circle double the Cube Find the Degrees of Longitude The Ptolomaick and Copernick Spheres Set ' Stronomers together by the ears Pixes Plots Charts Globes and Maps Give Demonstrations by haps So do Galilean Glasses Quadrants Loxodromi for some Vagrants Schemes Horolgies Horoscopes Astrolabes and Telescopes In Laboratories zealous Fire The Chymists Limbicks we inspire To firk up Salts fix'd or volatil Spirits of Silver Gold and Steel Sulphur and Mercury dance in a wheel Egyptian Mummies and the Moss Of Dead-mens Skulls purged from Dross Elixars Quintescential Draughts Raising Sallets and such like Crafts Fusil Marble Glass malleable Aurum Potable and Friable The Rare Inventions that are lost We recover without cost Otacousticon's Screws and Springs Automaton's Self-moving Gins The Oil of Everlasting Lamps The Art of killing killing Damps Flowers of Ashes many Feats Of Dry and Moist of Colds and Heats Jumbling blind Nature too and fro And Metamorphosing her too Come before her and behind her You shall not know where to find her Her Secretaries and her Masters Turning and winding her in all Disasters Panpharmacon 's Elixar vitae Extractions high and mighty Hunt Nature out of her Bow'r By Calcining every hour Ferret her out of sculking places Vertumnus like changing her Faces In all things striving to out-do her Yet for all this th' are glad to woe her Changing her shapes and in a Reek Making her play Hide and Seek Into prime Atoms her reducing By Separating and Infusing Putting her into Fainting-Fits And scaring her out of her Wits Till the Artist be left i' th' lurch With neither Wit nor Mony in his Purse Archimedes forsooth lackt a Base Be it spoke to his disgrace On which if he had stood he would Have turn'd the Globe round if he could Prometheus stole a spark of Fire To put Life into Dirt and Mire These are all lamentable Shirks Compar'd with our Monster-inchanting-Works The Sybils Leaves Mercurius Wand Jove's Thunder-bolts we can command The Staining and the Nealing Glass Spiriting all that ever was The size for gilding Balls like Flames And other Secrets without Names In Earnest what was thought a Jest White Powder and the Phoenix Nest Fine Washings hot Perfumes and Varnish Imbroyd'ring and Inlaying Garnish The Scarlet Fish and Gyges Ring And every Invisible thing When Spirits fall together by the Ears To lay them by the Musick of the Sphears To walk about Incognito To set a work Robbin good Fellow To make Fortunatus Cap Of Maintenance and all good Hap. To Conjure Spirits under-ground To find things that could ne're be found To renew Age and call back Years To free men from all Cares and Fears To charm the Moon and stop the Sun To awaken Endymion Charm Cerberus stop Charon's Throat Drown him in Styx and sink his Boat We cut the Bottom of the Streights Into the Red Sea spight of Fates It could ne're be done before The Sea threatned to drown the Shore For India thence we dare set out Cape-bon-Speranza is about Frobisher Anian Davis North-east-Way From Nova Zembla to China Speak but a word to a Stake A lusty Fellow it shall make To bake your Bread or brew your Beer To roast and sawce all your good Cheer Cook all your Pasties Pies and Tarts March-pains and the sweetning Arts Hogo's Fricacies and Oleo's Gusto's of all sorts Quarto's and Folio's Distill Spirits raise Perfumes For Persian or Arabian Rooms He 'l make
Smock Sinner or so Commute soundly and you shall be let go Fee Ogg the great Comissary before and behind Then Sin on you know my mind To Females all Males must be kind But Poor Whores no favour find Norfolk Swains that drive the Cows Whistle Littleton at their Plows Essoins Withernams Vouches Recapia's are stuffed in Leathern-Slowches The Salick Law is a rare Tool Excludes Females from all Rule Let no-Woman Fee Inherit Because in Wars they cannot Merit As freely Father goes to the Bow As the Son handles the Plow From the Females or Heirs Male A Fine past cuts off the Entail For a Recovery you may Rail No stopping a Ship under Sail. Pantomimi Histriones Wizards Egregii Nebulones Vox Populi vox Dei 't is confest Is as True as all the rest A Populo ad Regem Modus Conventio vincunt Legem It drives Shopkeepers into Nets When Priviledg'd men must pay no Debts Anaxarchus had the heart of a Porter That could endure to be bray'd in a Mortar Customs of contrary Feature Should they be call'd a Second Nature To say this Point is Law is in dark to grope Unless it agree with the whole Scope From Truth how can Falshood come Or Lyes harbour in Truths Room If all are inevitable Fate All Good or Bad 's quite out of Date Whether it be fair or just Men more than Brutes continual Lust How does Reason rule the Rost When Lasciviousness rides Post They couple only for a Brood Men for every wanton Mood They take their times for Generation Men at all times without Moderation What Witches were at the taking of Troy Fair Helena stole by the Roaring Boy Paris was that unlucky Toy Both fit to be call'd the Witches Joy Two contrary Parties Hallow Boys Hallow Jupiter in Troiam pro Trojâ stabat Apollo 'T is good well sung in Catches or Canto's 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 Which with a Pipe of Smoke to blow to Is Dimidium plus Toto 'T is time to bid your Companions be gone The Farthest about 's the nearest way home The Whole is greater than the Part That 's safe But the Contrary Thou lyest Ralph Every Effect hath a Cause There should be Reason in all Laws Clerks if you rightly apprehend 'um Hold Dignities in pure Commendam ' Cause men of Parts cannot be found While they are living above ground No harm for Wrong done shall come near ye Idem est non esse non apparere A Minor acts not without a Tutor An old Incumbent hath a Coadjutor And a Mistress hath a Suitor Status Naturae status Belli Is worse than Cock-broth in Gelly Jus unicuique ad omnia O rare Look out sharp the World 's a great Fare Nothing 's good but wha't 's Commanded Why should any man be hang'd or branded Nothing 's bad but what 's Forbidden Let Thieves and Rogues do as they 're bidden It should seem by all these Flaws Definitions are dangerous in Laws Go and be bound and pay the Debt You 're just taken in a Net I am all in a Sweat Come hang Laws they that have Brains To know or do them will take no pains For to be sure they 'l get no gains And they have many unlucky Strains For they keep us all in Chains 'T is better to be free and then We may be said to live like Men. Reason of State Reason of Law Right or Wrong keeps all in Aw Trust no Man if you would live brave Keep a good Word for a Knave Oblige all the World please every Man By hook or by crook Catch that catch can Study Men more than Books That will make you gentile Rooks. Get a Picklock for the Law To open every Crevise and Flaw Get Pincers and a lusty Screw To wrest from every Man his due Where Rocks are get Axes and Hammers Spades Pickaxes and Rammers Let all your Implements be ready And be sure to hold your hand steady Look big stand all in your Robes Like a Conqueror of both Globes From you every Line or Word Cuts more than a Two-handed-Sword Truth must not be spoke you say at all times The way to huddle up the basest Crimes To be an Informer is thought a Disgrace Then how shall Capital Laws take place Never of any Tale-bearer tell Tho you love me never so well But if I get a Friend in a Corner He will tell me the false Informer He that is an Inventor of Lyes By him many an Innocent dyes Deserves to be made a Sacrifice For shall not the good Law punish him sore And not suffer him to live to kill any more Is it not good for the Common-weal To reward him that shall Felons reveal Is he my Friend that will see me misus'd Or behind my back not tell me by whom I 'am abus'd Consider this Case better and try And do as you would be done by 'T is come to a fine pass you 'l say when Witches with Maces Authoritatively must Resolve Conscience-Cases For this call us no more Brazen Faces Nor load us with foul Disgraces We understand some Common Places Marcus his Scholars loosely taught That tho by all kind of Vice debaucht Yet no more tainted by these ugly Steams Than are by Dunghils the Suns Beams Sesostris was first Institutor of Fees To Souldiers he gave the best Aegyptian Lees. He fed them and taught them all in Warring And by this Tye restrain'd them from Jarring They must keep strict to Military Art From which Mechanicks might never depart And to preserve Families from falling The Son must be of his Father's Calling And so a Captain as well as a Cook His Father's Profession ne're forsook If he dye for his Inheritance he might go look 'T were good if Scholars were so kept to their Book But our Laws would never this Custom Brook To Souldiers and Priests so much good Land Preserv'd them close to the Kings Command Better than the old Praetorian Band. He also freed them from Taxes and Gabels Whose Names were listed in Warlike Tables So much Bread and Flesh he daily did award To all the Yeomen of his Guard They served their Master the rather Because he was their Foster Father Nomus Thebaeus assign'd to Regiments Panopolitus or Chemnitus all in their Tents Turk to this day prosecutes the same Intents For Love and Gratitude strong Arguments So Janizaries and Timariots Are hindred from Rebellious Plots The Roman Agrarian Law Kept Souldier and People all in Aw The Linotrophi not for Name With the Feudatories were much the same 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 〈◊〉 divided into Nomi Pannels Betwixt Nilus and Ostia Channels A wise Lady was once in hope To get License from the Pope For Women as well as Men to hear Confessions Resolve Cases and pardon Transgressions His Holiness his Answer did delay And bid her wait till such a day And gave her a Box to bring with her own hand But not to open it by strict Command The good Lady and her
Purses ‘ When they come into such Conditions ‘ Let them come out with their Prohibitions ‘ We can hear no Propositions ‘ Nor make any Compositions ‘ A Hâ—beas Corpus shall not remove it ‘ A Capias Animam will disprove it ‘ A thousand ways we have to fit 'um ‘ Hell confound 'um Devils split ' um ‘ The greatest safety in Law lies ‘ The greatest dangers from them rise ‘ 'T is time for all to open their Eyes ‘ Before they be made a Sacrifice ‘ We know where the Mischief lies For a base Rascal's Lust In no Mortal put your Trust We never into Purses dive Either to kill or save alive And your Posterity shall never thrive Smother all the Wasps i' th' Hive So we our Vengeance contrive Now a days 't is all the Note Young men are wise and Old men dote Experience is nothing now Old men want strength to hold the Plow At the Stern they cannot stand Young Wits are fittest for Command They can do nothing that most understand So the World thrives backward underhand This puts all Learning to a stand Judges you know damn all Commissions Lords answer no Petitions Make 'um for green Heads and hot Spurs Not for Sages clad in Furs Parents must not be Lords or Masters The youngest Doctors cure all Disasters Old Counsellers are past their Prime Take young Dupondias at half her Time Old Lytae you may burn your Books Give place to young Rooks You shall know them by their Looks Mongrel Philosophers be gone I 'le have a fling at you e're long Pety Foggers Fidlers Rhimers Ye are no better than Chimers We value not your Power or State Give us the Devil and his Mate Poet and Orator go prate To work Hags never stand still Bring us more Grists to our Mill We resolve to have our will The Watry Nymphs Primordia Are the Universe Praecordia These are accounted Genital Virgins them you may not call For they 're deflowr'd as we are all The Nine Muses are no better By Apollo that true Bone-setter Rationes Seminales Nunquam adhuc inveni Tales Spermatick Forms or Archei Are a kind of Semi-Dei Magnetick Particles are hurl'd By the Spirit of Nature and Soul of the World Vital Congruity Plastick Parts Puzle Philosophick Arts. Our Spells are nothing so perplext But Mortals have much more vext We preach much upon that Text. Old men lame and blind open their Lids Caper with their legs like Lambs or Kids When by a Taratantula Bit They arrive to more strength and Wit This is the Nail on the head to Hit Senertus a-la-mode de France Calls this St. Vitus his Dance An Iron Trevet on the Shelf Gives as good Oracles as the golden Tripos at Delph Satyricus Vmbilicus Veneris Provoke to lust utriusque Generis Yet the Rogue Wierus Is not afraid to Jeer us Wallnuts bear the Signature of the Head 'T is time for me to go to Bed The green Cortex answers the Pericrane The Kernel resembles the Brain The Salt of both cures the Head Pain Ye need never offer to open a Vein Augustus Herod prospered in Wars and Peace At home could find but little Ease Murd'ring Children killing Wives Were forc't to lend Cuckolds Lives Quintilius Varro and his Legions I remember well In Germany we 're fain to lead Apes in Hell CANTO IX A Pseudo-Daemon haunts the Town Beats poor Folk and throws 'um down Wou'd I could light on this cheating Lown Wou'd I cou'd find this unlucky Sot I 'de chop him as small as Herbs to the Pot. I 'de hang him and rost him like a Dog Or smoak him for a Bacon Hog Also there 's a Cant of Bitches That pass for counterfeit Witches Gypsies all and Ballad Sellers Juglers Smuglers Fortune-Tellers Palmestry and Lottery Spellers Spirits Sharks and Kidnappers And such like nimble Snipper-Snappers Of Girls and Boys Dye-Dappers Men and Women Entrappers Cutpurses all sorts of Trepanners Without all Honesty Wit or Manners Stargazers Pedlars Interlopers Tinkers Tumblers Dancing Ropers Rat-catchers Relique-Mongers Bully-Rocks Hectorean Dongers Figure-Flingers Circulators Almanack Prognosticators Nativity Calculators Fantastick Enthusiastick Quakers Canting Pretending Bewitchers For Beer and Porridge carry Pitchers They â—ram good Lug into their Laps Rake Dressers for Marrow-Bones and Scraps With large hanging down Paps Indeed I 'le have you by the Lugs For selling frothing unconscionable Jugs To feast your hungry Imps and Pugs Charwomen Whores the House command Filching all that comes to hand Sharking Drabs Kennel Rakers Ingrossers Forestallers Impropriators Insignificant Falsificators Counterfeit Rings and Jewels shining Gold Lace Money clipping and coyning Ends of Gold and Silver purloyning All kind of Honesty resigning And all Roguery refining Cutpurses live by their Fingers Hobby Horses and Ballad Singers Fencers Pipers Horoscopers Poachers Broom-men Kentstreet-Brokers Tom a Bedlams Jack a Dandies Jack Puddings Mountebanks Merry Andr'es Of all Trades Jacks and Jills That serve with or against their wills Madam Nurses Madam Washers Madam Dressers Cutters and Slashers All sorts of Wet and Dry Nurses Ladies look to your Purses Quarter Waiters Quarter Rockers Chymists Confectionary Dockers Madams Gossips Madams Tirers Madams what you will Requirers Madams unseasonable Desirers Madams Skullions and Wash-dishes Madams Kings and Queens Fishers And all sorts of Court Well-wishers A Ribble Rabble of old Jades That trade in Wenches for young Blades And Misses for old Cuckolades Stillers of Puppydog-Waters Black Patches and Beauty Spot makers Washes Paintings Cordial Drops Essences and Elixars for Fops Proctors Undertakers Projectors Bumbayliffs Excise Collectors Horseleeches Quacks Farriers News Gazets and Letter Carriers Scurvy-Grass Simplers Drugsters Monopolizers Hucksters Gamesters Deer-stealers Pickeroons Tripo's Jesters and Buffoons Thievish Hostlers and Grooms Catamits Bardashes Orphean Boys Lustful Trinkets and Toys Amulets Pictures Pilgrims Ware To be sold at every Fare Beads Roses Swords Banners Rings Puppets Bells Consecrated Things Conjuring Praestigiators Legerdemain Operators Jack in a Lanthorn Whipping Tom Will of the Wisp and Tom Thumb Women Dancers Puppet Players At Bartholomew and Sturbridge Fairs Or if you light among the Furies They shall be Ignoramus Juries Take in rank Casuists and Schoolmen Resolving Cases to befool men Pox-Curators and Red Noses Cooks and Caterers for Quelque Choses Secret Mysteries Disclosers Of other mens Estates disposers Assurancers Projectors State Engagers Dy-Coggers Betters and Wagers Fallacious Sophisticators Abominable Adulterators Pragmatical Agitators Busie-body Innovators Journy-men Hacknies and Tale-Bearers Cursers Blasphemers Dammers and Swearers Ranting-Rory-Tory-Ground-Tearers Counterfeits of Bonds and Indentures Sellers of Publick Faith and Debentur's To Knaves and Fools at all a ventures Prophets Contingencies Revealers Men and Women and Horse-Stealers Parasites Poor Robins Carvers Strangers Orphans and Widow-Starvers ‘ Pardon Reader this long digression ‘ To shew th' Abuse of my Profession ‘ By them that ne're had true Possession ‘ Nor were never brought to Confession Poor pitiful Pretenders Scrape-Trenchers and Table Tenders All miserable Offenders Inconsiderable Rascalado's That strut and make great
Eyes There 's Domitian catching Flies See Bloody Nero how he struts And kicks Poppaea on the Guts He Sings and Fiddles at the sight Of no less Flames than Romes by Night Disguis'd in habit of a Swain Handsomly basted for his pain The Devil was in him for they say He ript his Dam up saw where he lay Sejanus was a Rogue and Cateline Against their Country to combine Sylla and Marius did proscribe The richest Gulls of every Tribe Brutus and Cassius stab'd a Commander As great as e're was Alexander Cleopatra's doting Fool Mark Antony send them to School With Lepidus let Octavius whip'um For to the Throne he did out-skip'um Come Satyrs swinge your Whips of Steel We 'l help you slash and make'um feel A Generation of Knaves For sending Innocents to their Graves Xerxes how shamefully he crows Over the Waves and gives them blows And Fetters too to keep them in awe For breaking his Bridge indeed Law A Famous Duke with Pompous Train With a rich Ring Marries the Main From Brittish Shoars another swells And triumphs brave with Cockle-shells Cuckold Claudius Messaline Is every Varlets more than thine Before thy Face married thy Slave And led the Bride-groom to his Grave Another thinks he did much braver In doing his Horse that mighty Favour To make him Consul not to fear danger Gave him to boot a Golden Manger One feeds his Lampries fresh and fresh With fattest gobs of slavish Flesh For a Glass broke or Porridge spilt Runs his Dagger up to the Hilt He that shines in Diadems Drinks the Dust of Pearl and Gems In Crystal Cups 'T is costly Art For a Cordial next his Heart Heliogabalus the Gormandizer Caracalla the Bloody Miser Dionysius that Tyrant Devil Tiberius Author of all Evil Romulus Tarquin Villains bold The Plague of Mortals young and old Monsters of Men the Shame of Crowns The Sword 's an Enemy to Gowns One cuts Mount Athos in two pieces The Wiser gets the Golden Fleeces Don Quixots Red-Cross-Man in Steel Takes chanted Castles makes Giants reel Relieves all poor distressed Ladies And I 'le assure you does it Gratis George kill'd the Dragon sav'd the Maid E're since Knights-Errant are decay'd O poor Tantalus O poor Ixion O poor Prometheus in hard Iron O poor Danaides all the Fry Of miserable Wretches Come and try What we can do when all Helps fail If the Head can't save you try the Tail Will you always lie a dying Like Fools howling and crying We see the World all in a Glass What manner of Man Adam was All the mad Pranks that have been plaid Since the Foundation was laid We have Patterns fit for every Work From the Jew to the Great Turk Come then to us for we can tell Of all the Rogueries in Hell These and a Thousand more brave Sights Are represented for Delights Thus we battle in our Grease And Frolick in what Games we please We have our merry Bouts our Jovial Bowziâ—â— Our Junckets and our large Carowzings Pampring our Genius while we may With Nectar and Ambrosia We Devils Birds thus stufft and cram'd Our End is to be hang'd and damn'd CANTO VI. Lack you a Thousand Pound Wench To lift you to the Coram-Bench Court her Ghostly Father she 's Demure And you have her Cock-sure Lack you to drive a subtle Trade Mount ride your Horse to a Jade To Conventickling now or never And you are made a Man for ever Would you climb to high Degree Fee a Thais lustily Greaze her Servants build her Bowers And all Corinth shall be yours Catamits or Bardash Toys Dainty content of Girls or Boys The Stews of Venice is the same With the Long-Gallery of Amsterdam Lack you Glass Eyes or Painted-Faces Bumbasts Iron-Stays or Laces Fair Sets of Teeth Bridges or Noses Palats or Plump Breasts soft as Roses Silver Hands or Wooden Stumps For Arms or Legs or larger Rumps Or any other Secret Ware We can fit you to a Hair A Chair-Man or a Sequestrator Committee-Man or Agitator The Naked Wight or Tub-Divider The Stool the Bench or Stage-Bestrider These are brave Fellows the rest are Fools That plod and puzzle in the Schools We 'l shew you a nearer way to rise To honour than by Sacrifice Cromwel Bradshaw Peters Pride Cook Axtel Okey Ironside Chastel Clement Revilliac Fitz-harris Pick'ring do you lack Furies the strangling Dwarfs or Mutes Assasin-Banditi-Brutes We can furnish you live or dead To do your business at Board or Bed The Plaugues of Europe Goths and Vandals Huns Heruli those Northern Scandals Loiola's d' Alva 's Romanenses Hugonots and Albigenses John Hus Jerom of Prague Innocents by them betray'd Zisca shall bang them with his Bum When his Skin shall be made a Drum Popish Presbyterian Trade Traytors all in Masquerade Plots and Sham-Plots Whigs and Tories That trouble us with sad Stories Grebner Lilly Nostre-dames Whiggish Packt Juries Ignoramus Let the cause be what it will It shall be Billa Vera still Twelve Godfathers Good Men and True can Create a Knave or an Honest man Guilty or Not guilty make For Fear or Love or Hatred's sake Any thing to end or promote Strife Bribe to the Death or to the Life Our Lives Wives Children Fortunes lye At one Rogues turning of a Dye He 'l Swear ye through a Milstone Lye From the Earth's Center to the Sky He 'l split y' a Hair and ever after Sink ye between Wind and Water Give you a Broad-side Board ye rake ye Hall ye burn ye stem ye take ye Bear-up luff or tack-about In all Winds and Weathers in or out Like Proteus change to every shape Lion Lamb Fox Dog or Ape Drink ye all Waters swallow Death And yet never be out of breath Turn him every way and wind him But true you shall never find him He 's every thing for what you gave him To do or undo as you 'd have him These are but Knights o' th' Post and Petty-Foggers Bumbaily Slaves and dull Plow-Joggers 'T would vex a Man to starve or hang By such fit for nought but to bang Give us the Equivocating Proctors The sublime Reservation Doctors The lofty Rosicrucian strains That purchase Kingdoms for their painâ— Hang Dammy-Boys Stiletto-Blades Porters Carmen Assassinates The Wits the Wits the State Divines Loretta Compostella Shrines The Rota or the Areopagus Apollonius or Simon Magus A Felton or Ravilliac's Hand A Massanello's Command The Man in Hair-Cloth the bald Crown Devours the Riches of the Town For all his Cords Sack and Hair-dressing Lords and Ladies must ask him Blessing A Crosier Miter Triple Crown Scepters and Diadems pull down This is Cheating with a Witness Betwixt Religion and Fitness The rest are Mongrel Curs that Bark But dare not Bite save in the dark Pitiful Buffoons and Bumkin Boors Send 'um to truck amongst the Moors Give us the Renegado Blades That drive the Turk or Jewish Trades What 's a pimping Shark or Rook Let 's die bravely by the Book 'T is we prompted the ugly Moor