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ID Title Author Corrected Date of Publication (TCP Date of Publication) STC Words Pages
A39717 Life of Tomaso the Wanderer an epitome. Flecknoe, Richard, d. 1678? 1667 (1667) Wing F1227; ESTC R40935 4,412 17

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and he being the worst sort of Satyr not against Vice but Vertue a profest enemy to all that were Vertuous and never pardoning Vertue in any one So he was a perpetual Libel in the Court of others and to others of the Court and they but repeated his bold speeches when they wou'd speak ill of it though the worst they cou'd say of it was only that he was one of it Whence if the Court as they say be a Heaven or a Firmament where the Prince is the Sun and other Courtiers as they are nigh to him in place bright shining Stars he certainly was a dark Cloud obscuring all the rest and the Court wou'd shine far brighter if he were but away How he was a Soldier DUring the Warrs not to be a Soldier he made himself a Captain and to scape fighting has continued so ever since his Sword being so little able to boast its blood as all its nobility lyes in the Hylt and Belt and it derives its honour more from the Scabbard then the Blade All the Employment he had during the Warrs was now and then to bring up a Convoy of Wenches to the Camp a sort of terrible Engins of War that do as much harm and execution by Land as Fire-Ships do by Sea whence he gain'd the honourable Title of Pimp-Master General of the Army in which office he continued till chiefly for his sins his side at last being overcome he as from some common ship-wrack was the first that sav'd himself and so he were safe car'd not what became of all the rest Of his second Expedition I Could tell you but that 't were too long a digression how in this his second Expedition Cum Privilegio of Cavalier and Royalist he coz'ned more in the Kings name then ever Constable apprehended or Judge condemned Only I will say that if he fleec't them before he flay'd them now and plain Coz'nage might have past for Honesty compar'd to the tricks slights project and inventions which he had to cozen them especially his own Country-men so as his name became as formidable to 'um as ever Drakes was to the Spaniards or Talbots to the French and so it has continued ever since And in this and his first going abroad it was when he fell to writing Plays and h 'ad good witness he cou'd write one in a day or two imagine but what stuff it must be the whi●st Of his Writings 'T Is a great Commendation for a man to be tam marte quam mercurio as good at Artes and Armes and so was he for he was good at neither yet he would needs be writing though he could not spell and be an Author without Rhyme or Reason and without any other learning then only that of vice and debaucherie Whence his writings were so scurrilous and prophane as for less the Heathens banisht their Writers formerly and the Christians burn their writings by the hand of common Hang-men for less Martial's Poet was damn'd when forc'd by the Furies to confess his crime he only cry'd out Scripsi that he had writ and whilst others shall have other Books at the latter day produced against them he shall only need his own to condemn him and thousands others too there 's so much of the Devil and of Tomaso in them but that fevv or none ever read what he has writ excepting only such as are so bad already his writings cannot make them worse and so corrupted as they cannot corrupt them more Which he perceiving was so impudent to bring them upon the stage to infect that with it too by which he has frighted all chast ears from thence and will all the rest in time if he may have but his Playes Acted or the appointing of those which are Of his Religion OF his Religion I say nothing since he had none at all having left it long before that he might make no scruple nor conscience of any thing and your Athiest and Heathen were Names too serious for him who only made a mockery of it and counted it all a cheat Devotion foppery Scripture fabulous Heaven and Hell nothing and Gods and Fiends only inventions of men to fright and terrifie Fools from being as bravely wicked as himself who laught and made a fool of Machiavel for holding that none cou'd be extreamly vicious L' Envoy FOr his Diseases I will not touch them not to defile my self who had truckt vices for diseases so long till he had enough to furnish an Hospital nor will I describe his Person who being a Monster of a man I shou'd shame and dishonour Humanity to set him forth in any humane shape imagine him as ugly as you please whilst I declare his ugly qualities Onely to make an end of depainting him He is most commonly pictur'd with a Dog the right embleme of his disposition only a Mastive is too generous a beast for him it shou'd have been rather some moungril Cur always craving and never satisfied fawning on his greatest enemies to serve his ends and those once serv'd barking at his dearest friends by which Dog-tricks of his as he was an enemy to all so he made every one an enemy to him Thus have I briefly and in Epitome set forth his Life reserving the making his History more at large untill I shall hear that he is not content with this FINIS