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A38461 The English Jeroboam, or, The Protestant reforming magistrate and what the Church of England may expect from such a one precisely characterized by a transformed church-warden at a vestry-consultation held upon the putting in execution the laws against seditious conventicles : being London's caveat in electing magistrates. 1683 (1683) Wing E3094; ESTC R28613 19,060 20

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ascend the Pulpit they fall on their Knees for Divine Assistance as if they could not be Cock-sure of it at all times Then they have a Premeditated Prayer not much exceeding a quarter of an Hour wherein they Petition for Peace and Vnity and Pray for Kings Queens and Princes and such like kind of People though they know them Popish as our so-much feared Successor is and then supplicate Our Saviour Christ for Choice Blessings upon Arch-Bishops and Bishops whom we have found by the Spirit that we lead about us to be strongest Lambs of Antichrist After this Mess comes the Sermon which is the greatest part of a Weeks Study Written perhaps over and over yet may be delivered in an Hour Their Conclusions which we are neither able nor willing to understand are confirmed by Scripture Fathers and Reason They consult with the Original Tongues and such Authors as are called Authentick and Classical fetching their Water from the Primitive Spring because they empty Casks think they cannot have as pure nearer Home So by their great skill in Divinity gracefully attended forsooth with Variety of Humane Learning they will exhort us to Study to be Quiet to Try the Spirits to be Charitable Moderate Obedient to the Higher Powers and to do things According to Order with a great deal of such hungry thin Stuff I have utterly done with Them and Theirs and am heartily over-joyed that I have ever thought of this Happy Padlock But of this more at large by and by in its due Place The Pulpit-Cloath was the Legacy of a Blind Zealot as appears by that Jesuitical Badge J. H. S. upon it for as some of Our Learned Professors do conceive J. Signifies Idolatry H. Heresy and S. Superstition Oh here 's good Work What but flat Popery can be expected from a Pulpit apparell do with such a Livery These Letters of Gold shall be delivered to the Finer to make Silver withall and the Velvet because it deserves a better Wardrobe and the costly Infirmities of the Testator should be hidden by our Christian Charity shall be Converted into Window-Cushions for my new Reformed Parlor where I intend frequently to entertain those Immaculate Assemblies which the Vnregenerate call Conventicles The Hour-Glass shall be turned out of Doors for our Extemporary Teachers may not keep time with Clock or Glass and so when they are out which is not very seldome they can take leisure to come in again whereas they that measure their Meditations by the Hour are often gravelled by complying with the Sand. The Communion-Table hath since 1660 regained its Antient Name and Sire and had I my mind our nimble joynted Mass-Priests shall never be suffered to Offer or Cringe there any Longer But I will be bold with the Round Pillars that inviron it when the Leaprous Superstition is scrapt off to make an Impregnable Fence for my Hospitable Buttery The Plate that is there so Decently placed I know to what Furnace it might be conveyed to what Vse and Form converted and by what Means Multiplied and faithfully Secured But there is such a Noli me Tangere upon it that I dare not finger the Twentieth Part of it But as for the Velvet-Cloath adorned with the Jesuits Badge and the Silver and Gold Embroidered Glory about it I shall put to a more Sanctified Vse with the Pulpit-Cloath The Organs are of Levitical or Popish Institution and like the breath of a Basilisk they deter hence the Two prime Grandees of the Parish the most Celestial Almanack-Maker and the Best Tempered Potter that ever lived by Heaven and Earth They drown the Virgin-Melody of the Galleries and Middle Alley and against our Wills bring our Confused Notes into Order Therefore though I adventure my Neck as that Desperado did in Worcester Cathedral and his Predecessour at Cheap-side-Cross I will set them such a flat that shall lay them Breathless on the Pavement This Romish Merchandize will yield good English Coine at Pauls or the next Cathedral that is not Bankrupt The Table of Degrees Prohibited in Marriage is obsolete and so is marriage it self as here it hath been used for I see no ground to the contrary but when all things are Common as they ought to be a Man may Marry whom when and how often as he will This is a very short but a sweet and comfortable Doctrine to you my Dear and Attentive Auditory and so the sudden pricking up of your Eares doth assure me Let us now take a little survey of our Church-Books The Bible which always comes first to my sight and handling hath a dangerous Apocryphal Obstruction in the very Bowels of it which is of a very Malignant Influence upon the whole Body This is Composed of such Histories as bind not our Credence and Morality which shall not be the Rule of our Practice it must needs be presently Expurged Yea the Canon it self in respect of Translation is not free from Infirmity and indeed it is no Marvail since so many Mitred Heads had their Heads in the doing of it The Geneva Version is far beyond it But Old Hugh Broughton if he might have been suffered had exceeded them both A Learned Synod and what d' ye think of another Assembly of Divines without either Root or Branch of Episcopacy must be the only Aesculapius that must cure this Evil. The Errata of the Book of Common-Prayer as some call it or rather the Lethargy of the Church of England were they exprest at Large would over-bulk the Bible Yet the Ravenous Esaus of the World had rather lose all their Liberties and Properties which are their Birth-right than one Mess of this Red and Black Pottage I will not contaminate my Lipps nor abuse your chast Ears with so much as naming any Errors that are in it but refer you to Rabbi Lewis Hughes the Glory of the last Brittish Druides and divers others who have already smitten this Belphegor under the Fifth Rib. It further behoves us that the Singing-Psalmes be rescued from the Back of such a Monster and from those other Humane Inventions Te Deum Da Pacem Domine Quicunque vult But whosoever will that any but the 150. Psalms be continued may do well in my Vnderstanding to defend Robert Wisedome's Preserve us Lord. There is an Error in John Jewell's Works but it is an Error with a Witness and although it be Palliated over Jure Divino yet it is instar omnium errorum and hath in it the Spawn of all Abominations It is beyond pitty that such a Gemme should be defiled with so base a Cognizance He was a Bishop The very word Bishop I fear I offend in naming it so often imparts all the Mischiefs that are destructive to a Common Church or State Your Holy Indignation Brethren is well expressed by the present Groanings of your Spirits but be comforted for these stall-fed Lordly Prelates must come to their Fatal Banquet Erasmus his Paraphrase hath found the more Favour hitherto at