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A46653 Death unstung a sermon preached at the funeral of Thomas Mowsley, an apothecary, who died July, 1669 : with a brief narrative of his life and death : also the manner of Gods dealings with him before and after his conversion : drawn up by his own hand and published / by James Janeway ... Janeway, James, 1636?-1674. 1669 (1669) Wing J459; ESTC R11356 73,896 158

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and_o my_o poor_a soul_n to_o be_v reconcile_v and_o oh_o my_o soul_n what_o if_o these_o be_v so_o already_o or_o what_o if_o one_o have_v tell_v thou_o of_o these_o thing_n some_o five_o year_n ago_o certain_o they_o will_v then_o have_v be_v too_o great_a for_o thy_o belief_n but_o what_o shall_v they_o now_o be_v so_o small_a as_o not_o to_o be_v worth_a thy_o praise_n oh_o disingenuous_a soul_n oh_o lord_n pardon_v my_o unthankfulness_n oh_o that_o all_o the_o angel_n in_o heaven_n shall_v rejoice_v and_o bless_v god_n for_o what_o he_o have_v do_v for_o thou_o even_o for_o thou_o for_o my_o poor_a soul_n and_o what_o can_v not_o thou_o find_v in_o heart_n to_o endeavour_v to_o set_v forth_o his_o praise_n as_o much_o as_o thou_o be_v able_a that_o so_o it_o may_v be_v know_v that_o at_o least_o thou_o desire_v to_o give_v all_o the_o glory_n to_o god_n and_o not_o to_o dare_v to_o take_v any_o to_o thyself_o oh_o my_o soul_n what_o say_v thou_o what_o say_v i_o oh_o i_o say_v again_o not_o unto_o i_o not_o unto_o i_o but_o unto_o the_o great_a and_o glorious_a jehovah_n be_v all_o the_o glory_n give_v and_o because_o i_o hope_v thy_o desire_n be_v great_a than_o thy_o expression_n therefore_o fail_v not_o my_o soul_n to_o show_v forth_o thy_o love_n and_o praise_n by_o give_v up_o thyself_o whole_o to_o serve_v and_o love_n fear_v and_o admire_v that_o god_n who_o have_v do_v such_o great_a and_o wonderful_a thing_n for_o thy_o soul_n that_o pass_v thy_o understanding_n my_o belove_a be_v i_o and_o i_o be_o he_o oh_o how_o be_v thou_o sure_a of_o that_o what_o be_v the_o peace_n conclude_v oh_o happy_a conclusion_n oh_o bless_a conjunction_n shall_v the_o star_n dwell_v with_o the_o dust_n or_o the_o wide_a distant_a pole_n be_v bring_v to_o mutual_a embrace_n and_o co-habitation_n but_o oh_o my_o soul_n here_o the_o distance_n be_v infinite_o great_a and_o now_o rejoice_v o_o angel_n shout_n o_o seraphim_n and_o all_o the_o friend_n of_o the_o bridegroom_n 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to_o play_v be_v very_o willing_a and_o i_o think_v desirous_a to_o lose_v which_o be_v soon_o accomplish_v according_a to_o my_o hope_n which_o when_o it_o be_v end_v i_o can_v say_v what_o i_o think_v or_o how_o my_o heart_n work_v but_o as_o i_o think_v that_o very_a day_n my_o heart_n be_v somewhat_o trouble_v by_o what_o follow_v for_o i_o have_v lose_v a_o great_a part_n of_o that_o in_o which_o my_o heart_n so_o much_o delight_v and_o idolise_v as_o its_o god_n and_o rest_v in_o as_o its_o ultimate_a end_n i_o can_v not_o find_v rest_n in_o it_o as_o former_o and_o so_o be_v much_o trouble_v i_o go_v to_o peruse_v some_o toy_n that_o i_o have_v by_o i_o and_o among_o they_o there_o be_v one_o jewel_n which_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o put_v into_o my_o hand_n which_o be_v a_o book_n entitle_v the_o crumb_n of_o comfort_n the_o which_o when_o i_o feel_v my_o heart_n somewhat_o incline_v to_o peruse_v i_o be_v much_o perplex_v within_o myself_o and_o can_v not_o but_o 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what_o i_o then_o feel_v i_o can_v now_o possible_o declare_v oh_o where_o be_v i_o certain_o have_v i_o be_v surprise_v with_o the_o great_a enemy_n in_o the_o world_n and_o my_o life_n in_o the_o great_a danger_n i_o can_v not_o have_v be_v more_o trouble_v and_o have_v i_o be_v afflict_v with_o all_o the_o torture_n that_o man_n can_v have_v devise_v i_o shall_v not_o have_v be_v more_o torment_v nay_o i_o think_v if_o my_o deceitful_a heart_n do_v not_o deceive_v i_o that_o have_v i_o be_v in_o hell_n among_o those_o infernal_a fiend_n and_o have_v hear_v the_o yell_n and_o howl_n of_o those_o damn_a wretch_n i_o think_v i_o can_v not_o have_v be_v much_o more_o affright_a for_o than_o i_o do_v look_v upon_o my_o soul_n to_o be_v within_o a_o hair_n breadth_n of_o eternal_a misery_n and_o oh_o the_o condition_n i_o see_v myself_o then_o in_o be_v unutterable_a have_v there_o not_o be_v a_o everlasting_a arm_n of_o power_n and_o mercy_n underneath_o i_o shall_v undoubted_o have_v follow_v the_o step_n of_o cain_n or_o judas_n but_o o_o bless_a and_o admire_v be_v free_a grace_n and_o why_o i_o lord_n why_o i_o oh_o love_n love_n love_n even_o love_v unspeakable_a yea_o love_n unutterable_a and_o further_o in_o this_o my_o trouble_n the_o lord_n be_v so_o far_o please_v to_o pity_n and_o show_v mercy_n to_o my_o poor_a soul_n that_o my_o soul_n have_v not_o very_o long_o labour_v under_o this_o insupportable_a burden_n of_o her_o great_a and_o mighty_a sin_n but_o i_o perceive_v a_o door_n of_o hope_n as_o it_o be_v unlatch_v and_o somewhat_o open_a and_o that_o if_o i_o will_v but_o in_o good_a earnest_n turn_v to_o god_n that_o yet_o it_o be_v not_o too_o late_o and_o that_o there_o be_v hope_n in_o israel_n concern_v this_o thing_n which_o consideration_n do_v not_o a_o little_a comfort_n my_o poor_a soul_n and_o then_o further_o it_o please_v the_o lord_n to_o open_v my_o heart_n to_o visit_v one_o who_o i_o think_v may_v do_v i_o much_o good_a and_o i_o judge_v he_o fit_a to_o be_v acquaint_v with_o my_o condition_n in_o that_o i_o hope_v he_o fear_v the_o lord_n and_o by_o the_o way_n let_v i_o tell_v you_o that_o i_o do_v at_o that_o time_n unspeakable_o love_v all_o such_o even_o more_o than_o my_o own_o relation_n with_o humility_n let_v it_o be_v speak_v and_o when_o i_o be_v with_o he_o he_o joyful_o receive_v i_o and_o declare_v unto_o i_o many_o comfortable_a thing_n which_o through_o grace_n do_v not_o a_o little_a raise_v my_o deject_a spirit_n and_o he_o then_o lend_v i_o
and_o worship_n that_o and_o shall_v do_v what_o i_o do_v more_o to_o advantage_n self_n than_o christ_n oh_o i_o say_v again_o what_o a_o wonder_n it_o be_v that_o ever_o he_o be_v please_v to_o let_v i_o see_v my_o folly_n and_o oh_o if_o he_o shall_v not_o have_v do_v it_o yet_o in_o this_o particular_a how_o inexcusable_a have_v i_o be_v which_o will_v appear_v in_o the_o next_o answer_n min._n now_o let_v i_o know_v when_o and_o in_o what_o manner_n the_o lord_n be_v please_v to_o magnify_v his_o grace_n in_o convince_a you_o of_o the_o insufficiency_n of_o your_o own_o righteousness_n and_o of_o the_o rest_n in_o duty_n conu._n i_o will_v likewise_o make_v this_o as_o plain_a to_o you_o as_o the_o lord_n shall_v enable_v i_o so_o that_o i_o may_v not_o be_v find_v guilty_a of_o a_o spiritual_a lie_n and_o to_o the_o best_a of_o my_o remembrance_n about_o four_o month_n after_o my_o powerful_a call_n when_o as_o i_o think_v i_o be_v assure_o in_o a_o most_o happy_a condition_n 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abundant_a cause_n to_o bless_v god_n which_o be_v the_o sincere_a convert_n and_o read_v the_o latter_a part_n of_o that_o which_o treat_v concern_v carnal_a confidence_n and_o rest_v in_o duty_n all_o which_o do_v very_o much_o concern_v i_o i_o be_v very_o much_o trouble_v and_o begin_v to_o question_v my_o estate_n a_o little_a concern_v duty_n but_o true_o i_o take_v so_o little_a delight_n in_o this_o that_o i_o soon_o lay_v it_o by_o and_o return_v it_o to_o the_o place_n from_o whence_o it_o come_v and_o likewise_o i_o have_v other_o book_n as_o mr._n baxters_n self-denial_n which_o i_o read_v part_n of_o with_o much_o delight_n as_o in_o reference_n in_o deny_v self-pleasure_n and_o sinful_a recreation_n and_o vain_a company_n etc._n etc._n all_o these_o yield_a comfort_n to_o i_o because_o i_o find_v that_o i_o do_v real_o desire_v to_o deny_v myself_o all_o these_o and_o make_v it_o a_o great_a ground_n of_o comfort_n to_o i_o that_o i_o can_v so_o earnest_o desire_v their_o destruction_n but_o when_o i_o come_v to_o the_o denial_n of_o self-righteousness_n this_o be_v a_o hard_a say_n and_o self_n will_v not_o bear_v it_o but_o away_o i_o go_v to_o those_o book_n where_o i_o can_v find_v out_o as_o i_o think_v a_o way_n to_o heaven_n by_o my_o own_o work_n and_o those_o that_o treat_v most_o of_o a_o holy_a life_n be_v the_o most_o please_a to_o i_o but_o when_o i_o read_v concern_v christ_n or_o hear_v he_o teach_v to_o i_o by_o his_o minister_n for_o although_o i_o have_v omit_v how_o my_o heart_n be_v in_o hear_v yet_o i_o will_v desire_v you_o to_o include_v that_o and_o to_o suppose_v that_o my_o heart_n be_v in_o that_o as_o in_o read_v or_o confer_v with_o respect_n to_o the_o subject_n i_o say_v when_o i_o hear_v christ_n teach_v by_o his_o minister_n either_o in_o a_o pulpit_n or_o a_o book_n i_o much_o delight_v in_o that_o i_o hear_v or_o read_v but_o when_o justification_n alone_o by_o faith_n in_o christ_n merit_n and_o live_v by_o faith_n upon_o a_o naked_a christ_n as_o peradventure_o i_o may_v be_v put_v too_o upon_o a_o sick_a bed_n by_o reason_n of_o a_o violent_a disease_n or_o the_o like_a that_o i_o can_v not_o have_v strength_n of_o body_n nor_o composure_n of_o mind_n to_o perform_v duty_n as_o in_o a_o fever_n or_o a_o fit_a of_o the_o stone_n or_o gout_n etc._n etc._n i_o say_v when_o these_o noble_a and_o heavenborn_a mystery_n be_v treat_v on_o i_o be_v much_o to_o seek_v and_o can_v take_v but_o little_a comfort_n from_o they_o and_o so_o i_o go_v on_o from_o duty_n to_o duty_n and_o if_o at_o any_o time_n i_o find_v my_o heart_n dead_a and_o can_v for_o that_o day_n or_o week_n or_o month_n it_o may_v be_v find_v any_o comfort_n from_o they_o than_o i_o live_v in_o hope_n that_o although_o i_o find_v not_o all_o well_o at_o present_a yet_o it_o will_v not_o long_o continue_v so_o with_o i_o and_o so_o in_o some_o time_n i_o recover_v life_n and_o comfort_n again_o i_o say_v i_o continue_v thus_o for_o the_o space_n of_o above_o three_o year_n and_o now_o i_o will_v declare_v one_o thing_n which_o do_v more_o trouble_v i_o than_o ordinary_a and_o that_o be_v in_o august_n last_o 67._o it_o happen_v that_o as_o i_o be_v visit_v a_o patient_a and_o for_o this_o thing_n in_o particular_a i_o have_v cause_n to_o bless_v god_n that_o he_o place_v i_o in_o this_o my_o call_n who_o we_o suppose_v the_o lord_n will_v take_v away_o at_o that_o very_a time_n there_o come_v dr._n b._n to_o perform_v as_o be_v think_v on●_n of_o the_o last_o duty_n he_o have_v to_o do_v 〈◊〉_d and_o among_o his_o discourse_n and_o ad●●●_n 〈◊〉_d bid_v she_o be_v sure_a to_o lay_v all_o her_o sin_n upon_o christ_n which_o i_o like_v very_o well_o but_o withal_o that_o she_o shall_v lay_v all_o her_o own_o righteousness_n at_o his_o foot_n and_o not_o at_o all_o ●o_o trust_v to_o any_o good_a she_o have_v in_o her_o se●f_n but_o whole_o to_o rely_v upon_o the_o merit_n of_o christ_n which_o when_o i_o hear_v my_o heart_n rise_v much_o against_o what_o he_o say_v and_o do_v much_o oppose_v his_o advice_n and_o think_v it_o not_o at_o all_o convenient_a to_o be_v speak_v and_o doubtless_o have_v i_o be_v in_o her_o condition_n i_o mean_v so_o near_a death_n as_o it_o be_v think_v she_o be_v and_o he_o have_v advise_v i_o to_o the_o same_o thing_n and_o have_v clear_v it_o to_o i_o oh_o what_o a_o dreadful_a visitation_n have_v that_o be_v sure_o it_o will_v have_v put_v my_o soul_n into_o such_o a_o dreadful_a agony_n of_o confusion_n if_o not_o despair_v that_o sure_o i_o shall_v have_v dye_v a_o second_o death_n before_o i_o know_v the_o pang_n of_o the_o first_o but_o oh_o i_o say_v again_o who_o can_v hear_v of_o this_o and_o not_o be_v overcome_v with_o soul_n ravish_v admiration_n of_o the_o love_n and_o goodness_n and_o patience_n of_o god_n towards_o such_o a_o wretched_a nothing_o as_o i_o be_v that_o ever_o he_o shall_v so_o long_o forbear_v from_o destroy_v that_o soul_n with_o eternal_a damnation_n that_o will_v not_o with_o the_o cord_n of_o love_n be_v draw_v to_o accept_v of_o so_o clear_a salvation_n but_o the_o lord_n be_v please_v still_o to_o keep_v this_o upon_o my_o heart_n and_o although_o i_o be_v somewhat_o trouble_v but_o as_o before_o again_o i_o go_v to_o my_o old_a physician_n and_o take_v a_o small_a pill_n of_o prayer_n compose_v of_o a_o little_a fear_n and_o humiliation_n but_o no_o soon_o it_o get_v into_o my_o heart_n but_o there_o it_o be_v guilt_n with_o pride_n and_o so_o again_o become_v pleasant_a to_o i_o and_o then_o i_o think_v all_o be_v well_o and_o i_o do_v desire_n earnest_o that_o by_o this_o god_n may_v be_v much_o glorify_v and_o again_o methinks_v i_o find_v my_o heart_n so_o mighty_o incline_v to_o go_v on_o in_o this_o work_n which_o at_o your_o request_n you_o may_v remember_v i_o be_v so_o unwilling_a to_o undertake_v that_o 〈◊〉_d have_v great_a hope_n there_o may_v be_v the_o hand_n of_o god_n in_o it_o and_o that_o it_o be_v he_o that_o put_v it_o into_o your_o heart_n to_o request_v if_o of_o i_o and_o i_o pray_v god_n it_o may_v be_v his_o glory_n alone_o that_o may_v move_v i_o to_o it_o and_o not_o any_o self-pride_n true_o you_o may_v say_v i_o have_v great_a cause_n to_o fear_v and_o not_o to_o trust_v my_o own_o heart_n any_o more_o and_o the_o lord_n preserve_v this_o jealousy_n more_o and_o more_o in_o i_o but_o to_o my_o present_a purpose_n and_o this_o which_o i_o be_o about_o to_o say_v may_v have_v prove_v a_o great_a disadvantage_n to_o i_o